Tori: This is the other request from my friend. An Alex x Muller fic.
Ke: Again, as the voice of the readers, WHO THE HELL WERE THEY!?
Tori: You know those two random OZ soldiers who recruited Zechs at the Lake Victoria base because there were no other soldiers there while Noin was in Moscow to meet Relena? And they kept on calling Tallgeese an Antique? And then they use Zech as a decoy to turn the Noventa cannon (pride of the Alliance, don'tcha know) inland? And Alex says, "This is an execution!" when the leader offers to surrender? Alex was the blonde one and Muller was the black-haired one.
Ke: No.
Tori: Well, screw you. You're stupid.
Ke: …
Tori: Got my paycheck for Battlefield of the Pacifists today…
Ke: *reads it*
Tori: *giggle* Sorry for the really bad job I did, but…
Ke: TORI, YOU MORON!
Tori: *giggle* guess you noticed what I did to Howard's shirt…
Ke: "Buny is just a clumsy girl, but when she morphs into Sailor Moon, she fights for justice!" You're really messed up!
Tori: Why, thank you, Ke…
Alex And Muller's Big Date!
Alex pulled up outside Muller's house in his neon mango Jeep and opened the door for the smaller soldier to get in. He honked the horn a few times and waited patiently as Muller checked himself in the foyer mirror before running outside and hopping into the car.
"How've you been, Muller-baby?" Alex smirked and kissed him on the cheek.
"Just horrible. I've been wading through papers since seven this morning…" the soldier replied, "But that just made everything better."
"Well, I hope you're hungry! I made reservations at Café Amelia." Alex waited for a reaction. Café Amelia was where they'd had their first date, eight months ago. Tonight he was planning something special.
"You remembered…" Muller smiled, happy tears welling in the corners of his eyes. His heart swelled. Nothing could ruin their perfect night…
A few minutes later, they pulled up outside the tiny restaurant and Alex let Muller out, plucking him off his seat and spinning him around a few times before setting him down. Arm-in-arm, they pranced through the door and right up to the attendant.
"Alex, party of two," the blonde smiled and they were led to a small table, set with candles and a rose. They sat down and Alex ordered a wine.
"What are you planning?" Muller smirked, batting his eyes. Alex blushed and choked down the urge to ask him then and there. But their romantic moment was interrupted by a sudden outburst from the table next to them. Turning their gaze, they saw, well, the last people they wanted to see.
"Duo Maxwell, are you insulting my taste in women!?" a distinctly female figure cried as a braided boy nearly fell off his chair laughing. "Well, I chose you before, didn't I!?"
Her comment drew a "Ba-dump-bump-KEESH!" from the boy to the braided one's right. A blonde girl took the angry one's hand and pulled her back into her seat.
"It's alright…" she purred, laying a hand on hers.
"I'm sorry for yelling like that, Dorothy…" the braided girl apologized and the boy stopped snickering.
"It's those Gundam pilots and Treize's niece!" Alex whispered and Muller nodded.
"Well, we won't let the ruin our night."
"HEE-CHAN! Stop looking down Duet's shirt and pay attention to me!"
The soldiers cringed.
"Is everything alright?" the waiter asked when he arrived with the wine to see the two holding their ears.
"Um, those people at the next table are quite obnoxious…" Muller replied and the waiter looked over.
"I'm sorry, but nothing can be done. Miss Catalonia is close friends with our manager and… We could have you moved," he offered.
"Alright," the two replied at once. They took their bottle of wine and moved to the empty table across the room, which wasn't extremely far because it wasn't a huge restaurant. But it was quieter.
"Now we can really enjoy ourselves…" the Spanish boy said, resting his hand on Alex's.
No sooner had he spoken though than… "INJUSTICE! I WILL NOT SIT AT THIS TABLE IF YOU TWO DON'T CEASE TO DISGRACE YOURSELVES IN PUBLIC!" a Chinese boy yelled and jumped to his feet. The blond boy and the banged boy across the table simply ignored him and continued kissing.
"Wu Fei, sit DOWN!" the woman with strange curls next to him ordered and tugged on his sleeve.
"DON'T ORDER ME AROUND, WOMAN!" With that, the boy sat down and took up glaring at the couple.
"More Gundam pilots… And these are with that nurse, Sally Po," Alex grimaced, holding his head in his hands.
"Why can't we be open like that…" Muller whispered to himself.
"QUATRE! I SWEAR I'LL STAB YOU IF YOU TWO DON'T GIVE IT UP NO ONE WANTS TO SEE- ewww…" Wu Fei's sentence trailed off when Trowa remembered he had a tongue.
Finally, Alex had enough. He jumped to his feet and grabbed a knife off the table. "I KNEW YOU STUPID GUNDAM PILOTS WERE ANNOYING IN BATTLE, BUT TO GO SO FAR AS TO INTERRUPT MY DATE!? NOW YOU'VE MADE ME PISSED!" The soldier grasped the butter knife by the blade and with a flick of his wrist sent it sailing towards Trowa. He dodged it expertly (as it was sorta his job) and rose to his feet.
"…you're an OZ soldier…" Suddenly, all six Gundam pilots had their guns drawn and trained on Alex.
"Stop! I love him and I won't let you hurt him!" Muller cried and wrapped his arms around the taller soldier's waist.
"Muller…"
"Alex…"
"Will you… marry me?"
Everyone in the room blinked a few times before returning to their dinners. The pilots immediately dropped their guns and began clapping.
"I can't shoot 'em now… They're just beginning their lives together…" Duet cooed. Dorothy pouted a little.
"But we could start a beautiful war right here in the restaurant!" she protested.
"I like the way you think, you you've gotta have a little compassion. I mean, what if that was us?"
"You're right…"
"I love you, Dorothy…" Duet smiled.
"I love you, Duet…" Dorothy replied.
"I love you, Quatre," Trowa said.
"I love you too, Trowa," the Arabian responded.
"I love you, Heero," Duo cried, throwing himself at the mercenary.
"Ai shiteru, Duo," Heero whispered in the braided boy's ear.
"I love you, Wu Fei," Sally added.
"And I love justice."
"BAKAYAROU!" Sally yelled and slammed the Chinese boy with her purse before storming out of the room.
A happy ending for (almost) everyone!
~*~*~*~
Tori: Ahhh, all the twisted little romances of Gundam Wing and the one that doesn't work out is the average girl and boy.
Ke: What's twisted about 'em?
Tori: The pairings. I don't like 1x2, and Duet x Dorothy is QUITE scary when you analyze it.
Ke: *analyzes it* AHHHHHHHHHH! PREPARE FOR THE APOCALYPSE!
Tori: Yes, I agree. Duet and Dorothy should never be paired.
Ke: Yeah. 'Sides, Duet and Relena are a cute couple.
Tori: But you know how my friend hates Relena.
Ke: Just tell her Duet is doing a service to keep the girl from standing between Heero and Duo!
Tori: You know what else'd be scary?
Ke: What?
Tori: Duet and Hilde…
Both: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Zashi (roommate): WOULD YOU SHUT UP AND STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF, TORI!
