(Don't own the characters--don't even want to)
This year, the annual women's conference for Detectives and Others United in Criminal Hindrance Endeavors (or D.O.U.C.H.E.)overlapped the nation's 4th of July celebration. The participants were dismissed from speeches early to celebrate and watch the fireworks on the mall.
Anita Van Buren took her place among a gaggle of women sweating, swearing, and sipping from plastic water bottles. Everyone gazed skyward expectantly. Suddenly Anita heard the sound of stiletto heels on concrete. Turning around she got a blast from the past. "Serena Southerlyn! Only you would wear hells to an outdoor event."
"Yeah," said a buxom beauty pushing her way through the crowd. "What kind of a D.O.U.C.H.E. are you? You trying to show us up?"
Serena blinked innocently. "No, Detective Benson. This is the way I always dress. Even my house slippers have heels."
"Now that I'd like to see," Olivia said.
Serena perked up. "Really?"
"What's going on here?" Eames asked, joining the fray. "Where are the fireworks? They said there'd be fireworks. I promised Bobby pictures."
"They'll get around to it," Benson said, tucking her hands into her back jeans pockets and adding two inches to her bust. "In the meantime, we're discussing heels."
"I've known a few of those," said a redhead sipping water from a mug that read PRINCESS.
"Who the hell are you?" asked Van Buren.
"Oh, don't mind me. I just needed to get away from house and hubby. Now what about heels?"
"They're attacking the way I dress," Serena sobbed. She looked at the group of women frowning at her. "Is this because I'm a lesbian?"
"Of course not," said a voice over her shoulder. Rodgers handed a handkerchief to Serena. "I'm a hasbian, and they never attack me."
"A hasbian?" inquired Eames.
"A retired lesbian," Benson explained, looking melancholy.
Suddenly the sky exploded with light and all the D.O.U.C.H.E.'s looked up. While everyone ooohed and aaahhhed at the spectacle, Serena slipped her hand into Olivia's. "Well, at least you're a blond," Benson said.
