okay guys, so this is my very first fanfic ever. I'm very fond of the lizzington ship and I have read tons of brilliant fanfics. My native language is dutch, so please forgive me if I made some mistakes...

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Chapter 1

The silence was killing her.

It was killing her ability to breathe, to move. Liz thought she could handle Red ignoring her, but as it turns out she could not. She thought she got to know him pretty well after being on the run with him for over month now. But of course she didn't. He was Raymond 'Red' Reddington after all, the Concierge of Crime. But even so, it was disappointing to feel their connection take a beating. They had survived five weeks together. Day after day they talked, shared meals and killed time on his jet on their way to their newest safehouse. He had been kind and understanding. Telling her about his first time on the run and how difficult it could be. But she knew that she destroyed whatever bond that was beginning to form between them. And knowing that it was her fault was making it so much worse.

Lizzie had no idea where they were going, but she couldn't care less. She was exhausted. And deep down she knew Red would not jeopardize her safety. It was dark outside and there were no street lanterns lightning the dark road. But Dembe was an excellent driver. Red's bodyguard had a soft spot for her, she knew. And Liz herself returned that feeling, having been saved on several occasions by this quiet man. But the disappointment his eyes carried when he was looking at her these last few days, was making her feel guilty. Lizzie inhaled sharply when she felt a hand palming her shoulder. She looked over and saw Dembe holding the door. She looked over to Red's seat only to see that he already left the car. She sighed. Quickly she took Dembe's hand and stepped outside. Liz heard the door close and watched for a minute how Dembe got their luggage out of the car. She knew she should follow him into the house but chose to wait and breathe in the fresh air. All she could smell was trees. Lizzie promised herself she would go out and explore their surroundings in the morning. But first she wanted a shower.

She walked onto the stairs leading to the small wooden cottage. Liz closed the door behind her but on her way to the living room she grew still. Red was yelling. "How am I supposed to do that, Dembe?! I told you I wanted it set up separately, and this is not separate." Liz frowned. She never once heard him yell, not to his enemies or her colleagues and certainly not to Dembe. "Raymond, be rational brother. This is all they could offer in such a short timespan, you should be thankful." Liz couldn't see Reddington's face but imagined he gave Dembe the look. The look she's been receiving all week. The look he gives people when he thinks their being insufferable. "Thankful? Really my friend, I think you understand where I'm coming from. How am I supposed to share a bed with the woman when I can't even look her in the eye?" Lizzie swallowed and quietly collapsed against the wall. It was painful to hear him say those things. Her tears were threatening to spill over her cheeks but she shook her head to will them away. She wasn't allowed to cry not when she did this to herself. Liz took a deep breath and entered the room. Red was standing by the window and didn't seem to register her presence. She shared a look with Dembe who smiled sadly at her.

Lizzie bit her lip and then said: " I'm not going to keep apologizing, Red. I already said I was sorry and I won't force you to sleep next to me." Red looked surprized and a little alarmed but she ignored him. She reached for her luggage and began searching for her nightgown. "I'll take the couch." Red opened his mouth and for a minute Lizzie thought she saw something what looks like disappointment flash over his face. But she wasn't sure. "You can use the bathroom first then." He left before she could say anything else.

Chapter 2

The bathroom is small but the water is warmer than she expected. The hot water was freeing her emotions and forcing her to relax. Tears were streaming down her face and she let them. It felt good to let go. But when she emerged from the bathroom she heard Red coming up the stairs. He stopped at the top of the stairs, his eyes widened briefly at the sight of her in just her nightgown. Liz felt a blush coming up to cover her face.

"There has been a change of plans, agent Scot. Something went down with my business in Lisbon. I'm leaving in the morning." His words hit her with a force that blew all the air out of her lungs. "Wh-What?" She shook her head, not understanding what she just heard. But Red stayed silent. "What?" She asked again. "I'll sent someone to keep you company while we're spilt up. I'll see you in two weeks." Red didn't even look at her. He turned and walked away. But Lizzie was quik to follow and began to yell at him. "absolutely not. If you think for a second that you can just run away when things get hard, your mistaken!" She moved around the room, picking up her clothes and toiletries and threw them back in the case. Red was still talking to her, explaining that there was no way she could come with him. "I'm coming with you." Suddenly, she's pushed against the door. They're touching from head to toe and Lizzie can feel the anger radiating from his body. "I said no, Lizzie," Red growled. "I don't want you with me."

The intensity of his gaze causing goosebumps in her neck. Liz swallowed. "I'm sorry," she said breathless. Gosh, his proximity was distracting her. Liz could feel his breath against her ear and they were touching in all the right places. She mentally shook herself, but still all she could think about was kissing those soft lips. How would he taste? Would he kiss like the way he dressed? As a gentleman? Or would he just take whatever he wanted and dominate his way into her mouth. Lizzie shivered. Red's grip tightened and he looked into her eyes. There was a smirk forming on his face but that did stop Liz from wanting to kiss him. She bit her lip. "What are you thinking about Lizzie?" Red spoke in deep, hoarse voice. Lizzie desperately shook her head. "N-Nothing. There's nothing you can say to me that will make me want to stay here. Alone." She tried to pull away but he just leaned in and put more of his weight against her. Her gaze wandered to his lips. Only to close after seeing them. When she opened them again she said fiercely:"Nothing has changed, the answer is still no even when that means that I have to- His lips closed over hers before she wass finished speaking. His hands were all over her body. He bit her bottom lip and made his way into his mouth, exploring the depths she had to offer. And she was feeling. For the first time since she shot O'connely, she felt something other than fear. There was a fire burning in her belly and she heard someone moan. It took a minute to realise that she was the one doing the moaning. It felt like he was everywhere at once. Feeling her up, touching her nipples and squeezing her ass.

But as fast as it had begun, just as fast he disappeared. Lizzie was still breathing hard and her eyes were still closed. "If you're in danger call Dembe, he is your emergency contact." Her eyes flew open and she stared at him in disbelief. Her legs were shaking. Red grinned devilishly at her, pinched her nipple and blew her a sickining kiss. "Be safe." Her legs gave out. Trembling hard she stayed where she was until she heard the door slam. He was gone. "Sick bastard!" She yelled and ran down the stairs into the dark. It had begin to rain. The wind was howling through the trees but she didn't notice the storm. Red was getting into the black car in which they arrived at the cabin earlier that day. "Red!" She cried. "Red please! Please don't leave me alone!" She knew it was no use. He was gone. He could not hear her anymore. Shaking and completely soaked, she went back inside. She stripped, got under the covers of the bed now only for her use and curled up underneat the sheets. What the hell was she going to do now?