Teehee, this one was enjoyable. At least, it is so far. The title is not really working for me right now, but whatever, it was the best I could come up with.

Hope you like it!

PS. it's so far a bit more raunchy and out there than my other fluff...but still I tried to keep them in character without turning them into sex fiends.

WARNINGS: If you are uncomfortable with gay sex, be a gem and click the 'back' button.


"Come on, I haven't got all day. Do you want it or what?" The voice was hard to miss. It was Draco Malfoy, and the way his words slurred it was pretty apparent that he was drunk out of his mind.

Oh shit. Ron thought, They don't know I'm in here, do they? Ron considered his options. He could reveal himself, but no doubt it would result in an awkward situation for everyone. Or he could wait it out. IT. Ron could feel the blush rise on his neck. You just HAD to choose the one and only gay bar to use the bathroom, didn't you? Couldn't wait for the next open business?

"Unhh!" Ron's thoughts were interrupted by the heavy panting and groaning. The door on his stall began shaking, Oh no. They are not having sex on my stall door. No fucking way!

Ron squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop his mind from imagining it. Draco was pretty small in frame, so it would be Draco who was…Oh Merlin! You poof, you've got an erection. Go on; jack off to the gay sex, why don't you?

And how could he not? All he could think of was the sweat and panting and firm muscles and gliding skin on skin, and that he hadn't had time to himself in over a week…Oh

Huh? The noise has stopped?

"Wait a minute!" Why had they stopped? But Ron was too far to stop now, he was almost there, almost…

"Weasley?"

Ron blinked. Malfoy was in the stall, staring at him in disbelief. What was that all over his face? Ron looked down, realization dawning.

"Ma-Malfoy…this isn't what it looks like."

Malfoy's expression hadn't changed. He didn't even respond.

It's over, it's all over, and your life is ruined. Hermione will never marry you. You might as well become a hermit now, stupid Ronald Weasley, horny as fuck.

"M-Malfoy? Please say something?"

The blonde was still staring in shock, "Weasley, please get off that toilet, I need to puke. Now!"

Minutes later Ron was still in the stall standing over a green Malfoy. The other man had apparently left awhile ago. Draco finally seemed to hack up the last of his stomach's contents. Ron handed him a towel silently. Draco wiped his face and looked up groggily, confused, "Did you come on my face?" and then passed out.

Fuck! What do I do? I can't bring him home, can I? Is that weird? Will he think I'm trying to take advantage of him? RON! Bring him home you stupid idiot, it's the least you can do for wanking on his face.

Right. Ron picked up the smaller blonde and apparated back to his house.

This was shaping up to be the weirdest night of his life.


Ohohoho! What's next? I'll let you know after you've given me bountiful reviews!

(Still, it might be awhile, I really haven't written much more... just a heads up. Although nothing gives me inspiration like friendly comments!)