Broken Image
Chapter 1: Who I am
I remember…it was a beautiful, warm, sunny day. The cool air brushed against my face with the warmest of desire. I wanted it to never end, but sadly my eyes came apart. The sun shined upon my lips as a good morning. Everything was perfect…right here.
I'm Mashi Kuna, well my real name is Mashiro. I'm an 18 year old girl, a weird one at that, with bottled up emotions inside. I am a senior in the academy with my weirdest of friends. At least, if you just looked at us we wouldn't be matching one another at all. They are nice in their own way…but they're still kind of frightened of me. I act happy or make a fool of myself just to see them happy and to see them smile. I was always the type to be so selfless; I always wanted to make everyone else happy, never myself.
My whole life was messed up from the very beginning. As a young child I was never given the opportunity to be one, and even so...it wasn't so great either.
Throughout my whole childhood I was teased, mocked, and bullied by everyone around me. Mostly it was the boys who enjoyed messing with me; the girls just kindly welcomed me with eyes that were full of pity. No one noticed the bruises, scratches, and even blood that appeared on my body, no one cared to pay attention. I was alone from the beginning…alone to be raised with my father, who even him, didn't love me, or cared about me enough to help, all he really did was give me a roof over my head, clothes to cover myself up with, and trinkets for company, along with food to fill myself contently.
He never really cared for me, just bought my 'love' I guess. And even so I barely got to see him since he seemed to be enjoying his own life with his friends and what not.
There was a time when I was about 6 years of age, my father started to stick around just a little more than usual. On a certain day he brought home a friend but the thing was…he seemed to be American. It confused me at first, to see my very first non-japanese person. Different kind of skin, kind of overweight with a purple polar bear tattoo pasted on his left arm.
"Mashiro, this is my good friend John Felcon."
John Felcon…
John Felcon..
That name tears me down every time I hear it. That name haunts my mind every night I go to bed, every time I close my eyes. He's a poison that won't leave my veins…a poison that is slowly crawling its way to my heart, killing me in a painful way.
"Now Mashiro…you know what to do."
"B-But John.."
"Call me sweetie, no formalities."
And with that he made me do what he told me so. I bit my lip hard, slowly pulling off my clothing one by one…and when I was done with that, I set myself on all fours on my bed. And with that, he tore me. Night by night. He did such adultery to my mind, body…and soul, I'm traumatized. I never really told anyone, but it lasted until I turned of the age 12. By then it seemed like he had to move; work related most likely. But for me, it was the day life decided to give me a break.
I was so glad…so glad to finally be free, to finally feel the fresh air again. But Then I realize…where had my childhood gone? Where does my life go from here? I've been exposed to so much at such a age, I have developed a very mature mind set yet..
How do I go on?
Father never realized; he had too much fun enjoying a close relationship with the man. Hell…he even called him his brother. I think he had his suspicions, but I guess the thought of having someone close to him do such a thing was impossible, he never made an effort. I guess that's also why I hate him so much, and that's when I became Mashi.
Life was hard…at mid 12, I was used by men again till the age of 13. I never gave them the front of me...I felt that if anyone was to breach me there, my life would have very little meaning, and I would fail myself as a person. I want to stay untouched, I want at least one holy spot on my body. Men were such scum to me, and they still are. I hate them all, and to protect myself I always scared the guys around me which was a good thing because I'd be safe from them.
Safe from anymore hurt that can be caused by them.
But even if they couldn't hurt me physically…it always happened mentally.
My green hair got me laughed and teased at,
And the thought of the one man who ruined my childhood still haunts me, and cripples me mentally. Not every life can be a fairytale. I've learned that the hard way. Not everyone who's happy and is the clown of the group has the greatest life.
It takes someone close, someone who cares enough to see past their fake façade. I wish I had something like that actually…To have someone care enough to see through me, to see the pain and suffering I'm going through, that would be that day my savior comes.
And I hope my savior comes soon..
YEP!
Short first chapter. This is based off of someone I know and I'm simply protecting the names of all the INNOCENT people with characters.
The second one will come soon; this is written down so all I really have to do is add-on and name change. Sorry if this seems...a little more dark
than the rest of my stories. I wanted to be a little realistic here so bare with me kay? Love you all.-Q.S.O
