Based on snowells deleted scene from 1x20 – Caitlin never ceased to impress Harrison and she could say the same about him.
She found him by Barry Allen's bedside just like at any other start or end of the day and every time she did so, he never ceased to touch her heart. Doctor Harrison Wells, the city's newest pariah, now on a wheelchair, his career along with S.T.A.R. Labs left in ruins and yet, he still fought, he remained strong. Caitlin was amazed by that strength of his if she were to be honest. She'd never seen him complain about his physical disability, not even when she'd rushed to the hospital that fateful night when it'd happened. She could still remember it well as she'd run out of the Labs and started searching for him frantically, not able to locate him anywhere, terrified he might still be inside and she'd never get the chance to… She sighed, frowning slightly at the memory. Thank God, he survived, but when she saw the medics carrying his unconscious form from the building, her heart almost stopped. The entire following night she spent in the hospital by his side, afterwards only leaving to get something to drink or eat or to take a shower. Yet, she never told him what she so desperately wanted him to know. Or maybe he already did. She wasn't sure. She'd tried to remain professional when he'd found her and invited her to work for him. She really had. She was actually still trying to, but she found herself failing. Failing every single damn time. Because she couldn't help the tender looks she'd been giving him, the care showing in her voice. She couldn't refrain from touching him sometimes, but she still made sure for it all to seem platonic. Well, not to her. The special connection they'd seemed to share ever since the moment they'd met had never been platonic. There was too much electricity hanging in the air between them, too much care being exchanged. She knew him to sometimes be a difficult man, but whenever his eyes set on her, his features always smoothed out and sometimes he even seemed to be uncomfortable with the way he couldn't help being around her, which only melted her heart more and gave her hope…
She was lingering in the door for too long and he must've sensed she was there, because he spoke, "I made a call…" there was clear hesitation in his voice as though he was hesitant to breach the subject, "to doctor Pearson at the university… and I told her that you would be perfect to head up a new molecular neuro-biology team." He didn't dare look at her when he finished, which only made her hope that maybe he wished she'd declined, that just maybe, he wished for her to stay. The gesture itself despite his own personal needs that were clearly in conflict here, only made her sure of her own feelings for the man.
"She made me the offer yesterday," Caitlin finally decided to reveal, feeling all nervous out of the sudden when noticing he just cocked his head her side, but refused to turn and actually look at her. Maybe he was afraid there would be too much written all over his face and he only wanted the best for her even if that hurt him in the end.
"She did?" he prompted carefully and finally, finally he slowly turned to meet her eyes, a slight frown marrying his features when he heard, "But I'm not… concerned about my career right now." There was a questioning look on his face, so she decided to just say it, "You need me. You're still… recovering yourself."
"No… I'm…" he started and immediately came to an awkward stop, his gestures betraying his nervousness and the fact that he avoided her eyes again. Eventually, he risked a quick glance at her after which he chuckled and quickly looked away, knocking on the bed in which the young man called Barry Allen lay. "Sturdier than you think," he commented and Caitlin found it comical. She also felt such hope entering her heart that she had trouble containing her emotions. She didn't want to give away too much, but clearly, he seemed to have the same problem.
"I don't want the world…" he eventually started again, now seeming to be even more embarrassed, "to judge you… by the company you keep." After having said that, finally, he dared look at her again and she was speechless because of the expression she saw in his radiant blue eyes. She felt like she could look into them forever, like she could just drown in them.
"The company I keep is working day and night to save the life of a man he doesn't even know. After everything that happened, you could've left, too." Could she be even more transparent? She wondered. Or maybe she just wasn't transparent enough? Maybe she should be braver? Maybe she should show him that despite everything that had happened to him, she'd still choose him in a heartbeat. "I wanna help."
"You never cease to impress me, Caitlin," he eventually said after another longer moment of awkward silence.
She wished she could've reached out to him, hugged him, held him, anything just to feel close to him, but before she was able to speak again, he drove out of the room, leaving her to check Mr. Allen's vitals one last time so she would be free to go home herself.
Caitlin wished she'd been braver. She wished she'd said more, hadn't just left the Labs for the night like she always did, also always regretting not having done or said anything. She was so helplessly and irretrievably in love with Harrison Wells and she couldn't even look him in the eye and say those words. She was afraid. She was afraid she'd destroy what they already had, because… because what if he didn't see her like that? What if it was all in her head?
"Stupid, stupid girl," she murmured under her breath when holding the wheel as she was driving home. Just then, her phone rang and she was surprised to see dr. Wells's ID pop up on the screen. She reached for the device and picked up, knowing she probably shouldn't be talking and driving in the same time, but she was curious. She couldn't just not answer.
"Dr. Wells? Is everything all right?"
"Did you mean it?" she heard his intense voice on the other side.
"What… What are you talking about?"
"Did you mean what you said?"
"All of it and…" Caitlin hesitated, weighing her options in her head, trying to assess what he meant by what he was saying now, "and more," she finally decided to just do it. To say it. Even if it didn't really convey much information.
"Caitlin, I… I think I need to see you. Now," she heard his changed voice and after she thought about it, she realized that he was trying not to make his emotions known.
She made a turn and drove straight to his house without hesitation.
He opened the door almost immediately and when considering his wheelchair predicament, she guessed he was waiting for her behind it.
"Caitlin, I'm sorry," he apologized in his usual slightly awkward manner that he seemed to betray whenever she was around him.
He led her to his spacious living room and as she took a seat on his large crème sofa, he came to a stop in his wheelchair right next to it.
She let herself study his face and saw him nervously taking off his glasses and looking aside after which he sighed heavily and put them back on, finally meeting her eyes.
"Caitlin… I…" He sighed again, putting his hands together and rubbing them slightly before lowering them back to his knees nervously and she couldn't possibly stand this tension any longer, so she reached for them and closed in her own. His surprised blues immediately met her hazels.
"Just say it, please. It's been too long," she encouraged him softly and his pupils dilated as he heard that.
"I… um…" He cleared his throat. "Listen… I know I probably shouldn't be calling you," he took one of his hands away to fix his glasses one more time. "Well… I probably shouldn't be doing lots of things…"
"Harrison," she said warningly, giving his left hand, that she was still holding, a gentle squeeze.
"You deserve better, Caitlin," he finally confessed, looking her in the eye with all of his intensity. "You always did and always will. And now… look at me… I'm a pariah, people hate me, my Labs are ruined… and you deserve so, so much better. You deserve someone who'd give you the stars and I'm not that man anymore."
"If I cared for those things, I'd say yes to the university job, Harrison."
"And here I thought you said no because you wanted to do some good."
"That was a lie. I said no because I couldn't bear to leave you."
That blatant confession hung in the air between them and there was sudden silence. Silence in which Harrison could do nothing but stop thinking, all the valid arguments he had flying away from his mind as only Caitlin and her beauty and love mattered. He didn't even know how it happened that he reacted then, but he did, reaching his hands to her face and they seemed to meet half-way as she did the same, their lips colliding together, moans escaping them at the sensation.
Before Caitlin managed to realize what she was doing, she was leaving the sofa and suddenly sitting in his laps, just needing him closer and closer because she'd craved this man for so long and was finally able to kiss him with abandonment. And how he could kiss! Their lips moved so naturally together that they didn't even think, they could just feel as their tongues met and bodies pressed together, her coat soon dropping to the floor, his own pants becoming tighter as she grazed herself against him.
"Wait… wait…" he eventually said as he stopped tasting the skin on her neck. He forced himself to pull away just a little. "We… We need to talk about this... This life… Caitlin, it won't be easy."
"I don't want easy," she told him when putting her arms around his neck, "I just want you."
After that he truly had no more arguments left. He could just feel her, let her do whatever she wanted to him and return with the same. Her hot, beautiful and plaint body soon enveloped his own and he found himself home.
Truth be told, he never intended on leaving it again.
