"Tricky Love"

A.N. I do not own anything of MASH besides the 2 characters, Lieutenant Sallas and his daughter.

All was as usual at the MASH 4077 and at the time it was fall, really close to winter. There had not been any casualties or even heavy fire a while, so everyone there had inefficient amounts of time on their hands and not patients. Hawkeye and BJ were drinking their latest concoction from their sill, relaxing in The Swamp. Klinger was in his tent with most of the nurses, helping them pick out the latest dresses in fashion….at least in Korea fashion, while also sewing some things for himself as well. Coronal Potter and Father Mulchady were in the Mess Tent feeding themselves some, "Food" if you would call whatever it was that. Hotlips and Burns went out for a picnic, which started several hours ago and had yet to return.

Now Radar was actually the only one doing business at the time because, they were getting a new arrival today. Unlike all the others, this one was tight-lipped, he didn't even know if it was a girl or guy. All he knew was that this one was special, he could feel it. He was in the V.I.P Tent at the moment finishing up the last preparations of the room. He took off his hat, wiping his forehead, before replacing it on his head. As he turned around to head out, door swung open hitting him straight on the nose, making him fall backwards onto his butt. His glasses were askew on his face, nose red and starting to bleed, as he put his hand to his nose. He heard the voice of Father Mulchady saying, "Oh I'm sorry my child! I was just here to tell you the new arrival will be here any moment! Coronal Potter said this was someone important and we all have to be there. Hurry, Hurry now!" As he was saying this, he was pulling Radar up by his forearm, literally dragging him out of the V.I.P Tent. All the while Radar had one hand to his nose trying to stop the bleeding, while the other hand fixing his glasses. Father pulled Radar next to Potter and then left him to go to his spot, standing next to Hawkeye. Coronal Potter looked over to ask Radar, "Where's Margaret and Burns at? What happened to you Radar?"

"Uh sir I don't know about the Majors and a door did this to me." Radar said through his hand.

"Well here's a handkerchief until we can get you fixed up." Potter stated as he handed a Radar a red hanky.

"Thank you sir." He said as he replaced his hand with the hanky, just as a jeep pulled up. As the jeep came to a stop in front of them, Radar surveyed the man driving the jeep. He was Lieutenant Sallas, remembering in his mind to pronounce it as say-yas because it was a Mexican last name. His name suited his appearance for he had black shaggy hair, black eyes, a very tan skin, and was built like a body builder. He wore the usual uniform of a Lieutenant with his arm by his side, hat in hand, his other hand shaking Coronal Potters.

"Long time no see Sherman!"

"Right back at you Jose! How is the family?"

"Fine, Fine, how is Mildred? And the grandkids?"

"Just peachy, told me to send you and the family love."

"Well the next time I talk to them, I'll tell them family. Oh speaking of family, thank you for allowing my daughter to stay here for research."

"Not a problem Senor, I could never turn down your request for her to stay."

While they finished talking, Radar who had heard that it was a girl, turned back to the jeep to see who was in there. When he saw what the girl and what she looked like, he could barely stop his jaw from dropping. She was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, an angel in his mind. She had dark brown hair, up in a ponytail that reached her shoulder, with long straight bangs, reaching her red lips. Her eyes were a dark green that they almost looked black, outlined with black eyeliner and her body was a slim hourglass. But what caught him off guard is what she was wearing, it was didn't even look military issued. She had dark green shorts on, with black knee high stocking on, with boots. She wore a black spaghetti strap shirt with black stockings up her arms but her fingers were free at the palm of her hands. A dark green long sleeved shirt was thrown over her shoulder, with one of her hands on her waist. She was almost…smirking, but the look suited her, clothes and all. He had never met someone who ever dressed or looked as beautiful as her. She was amazing…..

He was shook out of his thoughts when he heard Margaret and Frank run into line, breathless and red in the face from trying to get here so quick.

"Sir! Majors Burns and Houlihan here sir!" shouted Margaret, with her and Frank saluting the Lieutenant and Potter. Both of the higher rank officers looked at the both of them when Potter suddenly shouted, "At ease everyone! I want Houlihan, Burns, Padre, Pierce and Hunnicutt in my office now! Follow me Lieutenant and you too, someone will be along to put all your things in the V.I.P. Tent. Radar as well." All that was called followed Potter into his office and sat down in chairs that were there. Potter cleared his throat before he spoke.

" Alright now for introductions, this here is Major Houlihan head nurse." Margaret saluted the newcomers before sitting down again. "This is Major Burns one of our surgeons here." Frank also saluted with a stupid grin before sitting down. "These doofs over here are Captains Pierce and Hunnicutt, both surgeons and Pierce is head surgeon." Each of the men took hold of one of the girls hands and kissed them saying, "You can call me Hawkeye and if your ever in need of Assistance, I'm always in the Swamp. Dingy little place, looks about to fall apart, that's the place." "You can call me B.J. and if you need my assistance with Hawkeye, I am also located in The Swamp." Both of the men sat down when the girl bowed her head in recognition and the Lieutenant gave them a look that was almost as deadly as a nuke. "This here is our local Chaplin, Father Mulchady." The priest came up and grabbed both of her hands, "Hello my child, welcome to our humble home." The girl bowed her head until it touched the priests hands, then straightened up.

"And last but not least our Corporal, Radar O'Reilly." When Radar heard his name he snapped his head up, still holding the handkerchief to his nose, eyes wide.

"Oh hello." He reached his hand out to shake the girls, before realizing there was some blood on it and retracted it. Blushing with embarrassment he kept his head facing the floor. The he felt a soft hand on his chin forcing his head even to the girls. Her eyes were full of curiosity and something else he couldn't comprehend. She took the handkerchief, pulling it away being able to see his nose. It looked broken and bruised, still bleeding a bit.

"What does she think she's doing? Coronal Potter aren't you going to stop her? Coronal-!" Burns started but was interrupted by the Lieutenant.

"Watch Burns, then you'll know." The lieutenant said with a grin, he knew exactly what his daughter was going to do.

Radar was lost in those dark emerald eyes, they were hypnotizing him. He could barely breath and he could feel her gaze reach deep into him. What he didn't feel or even notice was that her hand had went to his nose and with a quick jerk and loud POP, his nose wasn't broken anymore. He was so mesmerized he didn't come back to his senses until he felt a cloth wiping his nose and felt not pain, but relief. All the others, besides the Lieutenant who was smiling, were shocked that she could do this, without a yelp from Radar. Potter got over his shock first and laughed.

"Well it looks as if we have another miracle worker on our hands. Oh yes, I forgot the most important thing, this is Major Talea Salles, newest to the MASH 4077. Now we'll leave you all to be acquainted while I have a quick chat with Jose here." When they both had stepped out, Frank started bugging Talea.

"You? A Major? Ha, I bet its only because you're the lieutenants daughter. That's right, your probably a scared daddy's little girl. You couldn't even kill a fly! HA! And your probably as young as that silly corporal over there!" Frank continued throwing insults at her, while Talea ignored him looking around the room.

" Be quiet Frank, your probably just jealous because you were never that mature enough at her age to be a major-." "Or even now." B.J. finished Hawkeye's sentence, as they laughed at him. Meanwhile both Margaret and father were trying to stop Frank from insulting her. Finally the tiny corporal couldn't take it.

"Would you shut up and lay off! She's new here, give her a break already!" Radar yelled at Frank. All noise seemed to stop for they were all shocked that Radar rose his voice like that, even Talea turned to look. Finally Frank came to his senses, stepping forward threateningly.

"What did you just say to me, Corporal?" Frank's eyes were glinting with malice, while Radar realized his mistake. Taking a deep breath, he faced the Major saying.

"Y-You heard me."

"Why you little piece of-!" Frank started to say as he was about to hit Radar in the face. Radar shut his eyes, while everyone was yelling at Frank, when he heard two loud thunks. When he opened his eyes he saw that Franks shirt arms had been pinned to the wall by two large knives.

"Touch one hair on his head and I wont be weary to slit your throat here and now."

The strong, melodic voice came from Talea who had a knife in both of her hands. Everyone was looking from Talea to Frank and back again, waiting to see what happened. Frank was struggling, his feet kicking the wall trying to get free. Talea smirked before putting her knives away in two holders on her waist. She stepped forward until she was almost nose to nose with Frank who was struggling harder now. She whispered dangerously, "Mess with me, and you wont even have a head to think your stupid comments with." She grabbed both knives pinning Frank into the wall and jerked them out, letting Frank fall to the ground and put the knives away in sheaths on her back. Frank was having a twitching moment, while Margaret tried to calm him down, ignoring Talea. Talea made her way to the door before turning around and stating clearly.

"It was very nice to meet you all. I hope to see you around camp often. But until then I shall be in my tent, I bid you all ado." She turned and walked out through the doors leaving some bewildered, some seething, and some love sick.