Just a Man's Plaything

Chapter 1

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep!

The alarm didn't even make me jump; I'd been lying there waiting for it to beep for the last 3 hours. I hate mornings, especially after getting no sleep. My step dad had come to visit me in my room in the early hours of this morning and the headache caused from my silent tears had kept me up all night.

I got out of bed and realized that I was going to have trouble walking today, I had put up my usual fight last night, perhaps even more desperately than usual seen as I was already in a depressed state and he had got rough with me again.

I jumped in the shower, refusing to look at my body, too afraid of what I would find on it; quickly pulled a pair of jeans and a shirt on and brushed my long brown hair. I didn't put any make-up on; he didn't allow it so I had to sneak it on later in my car before school.

When I got down stairs my mum was sat eating some toast, she didn't have a clue what was going on, we had been growing apart ever since my dad died when I was 8 and I was too ashamed to tell her that her squeaky clean husband had been forcing himself on me for the past 5 years. I doubt she would believe me anyway.

I heard movement on the stairs and my stomach flipped with fear. He came into the kitchen and kissed my mum as if he was the perfect loving husband and I had to choke back the bile. Then he looked up and gave me a wink.

"Erm, I'm gonna get off to school" I rushed out

"Ok then Kimmy" Argh I hated when he called me that, "straight home afterwards, your mum needs your help round the house."

She looked up at him gratefully, "Thanks Mick", she was blatantly unaware that that was his trick for making sure I didn't get a chance to have a boyfriend. Not that anyone noticed me. It's not that I'm not pretty, people used to always comment on my beauty when I was younger and it had given me my ticket into the popular group at school, but ever since I had caught the attention of Mick (I cringed at the thought of his name) I had become quieter and quieter until no one bothered talking to me anymore, I had just faded away. It didn't really bother me to be honest, I mean yeah it was lonely at times but lonely was great for me, school had become my safe-haven, the only place that I could go to get away from him.

I jumped in my car and drove to school, not bothering to stick to the speed limit, I loved the freedom of driving fast. When I got to school I was pleasantly surprised to see a car I've haven't seen in a good 3 weeks. It belonged to Jared Makah, the only person in school I did want to notice me. I sat next to him everyday in Art but he hadn't spoken to me since kindergarten, not that I could blame him.

I don't really have any friends at school so I just went straight to first period. It flew by like usual, bringing me closer to having to return home but at least I got to see Jared next period.

The bell rang and I made my way to Art, ignoring the attention I always got from the freshmen boys who didn't know how much of a social outcast I was, if only they knew what I really looked like under these clothes.

I rushed to class eager to see someone who didn't mentally undress me every time I walked past him, someone who didn't even notice me, someone safe. I'd missed Jared these past few weeks, my fresh air had gone along with him and all I had left to think about was the black hell that was my life.

He wasn't there when I got there so I just sat down and watched the door, waiting for him to come in and make everything easier to cope with again. I heard the popular girls in the seats behind me gossiping about his mystery disappearance and how much he had changed but I just ignored them. I hated gossips.

I heard the door open and looked up to see the object of my infatuation walking through the door. Wow, he had changed, he had grown a foot taller and looked like he'd been constantly working out for the past few weeks; his jaw was more chiseled and he looked so tired I wondered when he last had a good nights sleep. He looked up and caught me checking him out. Shit, I knew how annoying that was and I felt the blood rush to my cheeks, staining the skin there, I looked away quickly and started studying the art on the walls.

"Jared? Jared? Jaaaarrrreeedd???" The voice of Jared's best mate, Paul caught my attention and I glanced up to see what was going on, instantly regretting my decision. Jared was still looking at me, eyes wide with a look of wonder glinting in his eyes. What the hell? I felt my cheeks redden even further. Paul was waving his hand in front of his face when he snapped his head round to look at me, as if something had suddenly occurred to him, and dragged Jared out of the room.

That was weird.

I looked behind me to see Carly Lewis, the prettiest girl in school who had been dating Jared on and off for the past 2 years and I quickly came to the realization that it had been her who had caught Jared's attention so intensely. Nice.

Mrs. Reynolds walked in and I tried not to notice when I heard Jared and Paul file in behind her. I resisted the urge to look at his perfect face for a good minute before I couldn't take it any longer; I glanced up at him and was shocked to see him still looking at me with that same look of wonder. I wanted to ask him what he was looking at but I hadn't spoke to him since we were about 8.

"Jared Makah!" Mrs. Reynolds was obviously fed up with his lack of attention, "do you want to be somewhere else?"

"Sorry" his apology was quiet and vacant, as if he wasn't sorry at all.

"Well Jared, your preoccupation with Kimberley has given me an idea for the next class project," My head snapped up to the sound of my name and I almost died, as I heard everyone in the room turn to look at me.

"Everybody look at your next door neighbour", what the hell? How am I supposed to look at him, "In the eyes Kimberley" I looked up at him, embarrassed to see a big smile on his face, wow he had a sexy smile, I had never been on the receiving end before and it was quite the treat to get free reign of looking at him.

"Get comfortable with looking at this face for the next 6 weeks and say hello to the object of your portraiture project". I heard groans of protest coming from around the room but I couldn't look away from Jared, I didn't understand it but there was some sort of instant electricity between us.

"Jared!" Carly hissed as she threw a piece of scrunched up paper at his face, and snapped me out of my trancelike state, "What's up with you?"

"What? Nothing, what you want?" He asked sounding slightly irritated.

"Er, I just wondered if you wanted Kim to swap partners with me?"

"Yeah sure I don't mind" I butted in, of course I wanted to be partners with Jared but this sudden attention was kind of worrying. I liked being invisible.

"No!" Jared sounded almost desperate, I looked at Carly to see her mouth hanging open, "we can't swap now, and it will be good getting to know new people." Did he just say that? Carly looked like she thought he was insane.

He turned in his seat, blocking Carly out, "Hey, I'm Jared" he smiled at me and I must have looked as confused as Carly.

"Erm, yeah I know, we used to hang out years ago. I'm Kim."

"Course I remember but I didn't think you would, we haven't spoke in a while" I was blushing again.

"Yeah, I guess you're right sorry."

"Don't be, you can't get away from me now" He smiled and winked at me and I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. That was what he always said to me.

"Are you ok, I was only joking?" he looked distraught

"Yeah, sorry I just feel a little queasy" It wasn't a lie.

He looked like he was going to say something else but I was saved by the bell. I grabbed my books, got up and left the room as fast as I could. After art, 3rd period was pretty dull but I enjoyed the normality of it, which was more than I could say for lunch.

I had got my lunch and was sat in my car eating it as usual, when I heard a tap on my window. I almost jumped out of my skin and looked up to see an anxious looking Jared. I rolled my window down,

"Erm, yeah?" I asked confused as to why he was suddenly talking to me at all, let alone outside of class.

"Are you ok? Why are you sat out here on your own?"

"I always eat here Jared, what's it to you?" It came out harsher than I had planned but I couldn't help it, school was supposed to be the place I came to get away from controlling guys. But Jared looked crushed and I instantly felt guilty, he wasn't my step-dad.

"Oh, sorry, I was just worried, I-I'll go"

"Wait, sorry I'm just a bit confused, it's not as thought you normally talk to me"

"I've never had the opportunity before, you're always so…so"

"Alone?"

"Well, yeah I guess"

I shrugged, "I like it that way" Jared looked confused.

"Why?" I didn't like all these questions but he looked as though his life depended on knowing the answer.

"Er, I just don't have a high opinion of human nature I guess" Wow, that was more honesty than I planned on giving. Jared suddenly had a big grin on his face.

"Well, I'm not human so can I join you?" huh?

Before I could question it he'd walked round the other side of the car and was getting in.

"So where you taking me?" He asked with an eager smile that made my stomach flutter.

"I-I-We have school Jared, I can't just drive off with some guy I don't know." As much as I liked Jared I just didn't trust the male species.

"Good job you've known me since kindergarten then" He gave me a cheeky smile and I couldn't help but smile back.

"I love your smile."

"Wow, Jared where did that come from?" Fear filled me and my eyes bulged from my head.

Jared looked shocked but that was wayyyy too much for me, I didn't have a clue what was going on but if he had some bet with Paul then I couldn't take it.

"Get out." I said bluntly.

"Huh? Kim I-"

"Get out!" My eyes pricked and tears threatened to spill over. Jared looked horrified and hurried to get out of the car and close the door. I had to get out of here, I turned the engine on and Jared came rushing back over to my window but I sped off before he could say a word.

"Hey Kimberly, how was school?" My mum asked as I walked in the door at the usual time.

"It was school, mum. I need a shower." I walked past and straight upstairs, I didn't want her to see I'd been crying.

After I left school I just drove to a spot I like to go to on the edge of town and cried for a good 2 hours. It wasn't just about Jared, that had started it but this was a regular occurrence. I came here when I needed to cry about everything that was wrong in my life.

I jumped in the shower and did my ritual mind game of pretending all my troubles washed away with the water until I felt ready to face the world again. I quickly got dressed and made my way downstairs to help tidy up.

"Kimberly, I need to talk to you, Mick has finally agreed to take me away on a romantic holiday and we fly off to Barbados next week." My face lit up, this was the best news I'd heard since, well EVER! Hang on Kim calm down, lets check the details first.

"And you're leaving me on my own?" I asked careful not to look too happy or sad and make her change her mind, which was unlikely seen as she never took notice of how I felt anyway.

"Yes, Kim but only for a week, I know we've never left you before but you're practically all grown up now at 16 and, well you know we need this holiday."

Yeah, they needed it all right, mum and Mick had been arguing a lot recently, something about him always being to tired to make love to her. Ha, I knew why that was; he was too busy raping me every other night.

"Mum it's fine" I said encouragingly, "I'll be fine, and you're right you do nee-"

I was interrupted by a knock at the door; my mum went to get it.

"Hello Mrs. Ryan, is Kimberly at home?" Oh my god, It was Jared. How did he know where I live? And hadn't he gotten the message this morning.

"Yes she is. Jared Makah isn't it? I'll just get her" wow my mum was letting me talk to a guy, she must really be happy about this holiday.

"Kim! Jared Makah's at the door for you." She called. Why couldn't she just have sent him away? I made my way over to them.

"Hey" he said as I reached the door, our eyes connected and I almost got lost in the huge range of emotions I saw there, I tore my gaze away and looked at the floor.

"Hi", my mum disappeared into the kitchen "erm what are you doing here?"

"I was worried about you after you drove off toda-" My panicked look cut him off.

"Shhhh" I hissed as I pushed him out of the door, "Mum I'm going for a walk, I'll be back before dinner!" I shouted back into the house.

"Ok Kimberly, take care!" Yeah, completely preoccupied with holiday fantasies to care about me going for a walk with some random guy.

"Sorry" Jared's quiet voice pulled me out of my thoughts, "I didn't mean to upset you earlier, I don't know what happened but I'm sorry Kim" I looked at him then and I could see that he meant it with every part of his being. Poor guy, he doesn't have a clue.

"It's ok Jared, I over reacted I just don't tru-" I stopped before I said too much, why did I keep letting my guard down around this guy?

"You don't trust people?" He looked disgusted, great now he thought I was even more of a social retard.

"Not people, just guys" At least that was only half as bad, and would probably get the message through to him.

There was a long silence and I looked up to see Jared seething in anger, I thought about running away before he could start yelling at me for blowing him off.

"Did some guy hurt you Kim? Cause I swear to God I'll rip his head off!" Shit, how did he come to that conclusion so fast??

"Erm, you could say that but I really don't want to talk bout it ok?" I gave him a look that told him not to push it any further and he looked hurt that I shut him out, making me feel like a total bitch.

"Look Jared, I'm sorry for being cold with you but I don't know what's happened today to make you suddenly care about me? Not that it matters, whatever it is you should no that I'm really not worth the hassle". Why beat around the bush hey?

"Kim, I can't stop asking myself why I didn't notice you sooner but when I walked in that classroom today something just…just changed, and I couldn't take my eyes off you". He looked me deep in the eyes and I couldn't help but believe everything that he said. My stomach turned to mush and I could feel my cheeks flaring up again.

"And Kim" he said stopping to look me straight in the eyes, "you are absolutely worth the hassle" he smiled melting me all over again.

I was about to protest but he beat me to it,

"So when are we going to start our project?"

"Well, erm, my step dad is kinda funny about me being around guys so it's going to be difficult."

"Oh" he said looking crushed.

"But he's taking my mum on holiday next week so I guess we could do it then?" His face brightened up immediately and I felt myself smiling with him. Wow, I was smiling, I haven't done that in a while.

"Great! Well, I've got to go do some things now but I'll see you at school tomorrow?" erm, were we suddenly friends now?

"Yeah…I guess"

"Great, bye Kim!"

"Erm, bye".