Well, after some time off from writing, I'm writing this little something just to get back in the swing of things. Props to Hammer for suggesting a fic with Guy in it.


I'm Your Guy

"Guy…I need your help."

The myrmidon looked up from the sword he just finished polishing. Matthew stood in front of him, hands behind his back with a nervous expression that clashed with hopeful.

All in all, the last person Guy wanted to see.

"What do you want?" sighed Guy.

"Well…I guess you could say you're the guy I need for a special job."

A vein pulsed in Guy's head. He breathed out slowly, and collected himself.

"And that would be?" Guy said, completely ignoring the horrid pun on Matthew's part.

Matthew sat down next to Guy. Unfortunately there was enough ground for him to do so. Guy knew at this point, he was going to be making a fool out of himself sometime.

"Well, I need a guy who can talk to a certain girl for me, and lure her to a particular spot so I can have a certain conversation with her." Matthew grinned like a wolf.

Guy blinked. "Stop being vague."

"I need a guy to lure Leila to a certain part of the woods where I can propose to her."

"And that involves me how…?"

"You're just the guy I need." Matthew affirmed with a nod.

Guy let out a sigh. He was quickly losing count of how many times he had done that.

But then an idea blossomed in his mind.

"So…that means I'm your guy?" Guy couldn't help but allow a small grin.

All of the humor drained from Matthew's face.

"Guy, that wasn't funny. Shut up and think about what you said. Elimine, I thought you were better than that. Now, let me run you through the plan."

Guy died a little inside as Matthew explained what was to happen.


"Leila?" Guy asked, just outside her tent.

"Hm?" She poked her head out of the tent flaps. "Oh, hello Guy. Is Matthew having you do your dirty work again?"

"Is it really that predictable?" Guy moaned.

"A bit. I mean, you are his go-to guy."

Guy went to his happy place for a few seconds, and then came back to reality.

"Anyway," Guy nearly pleaded, "just come with me so I can get back to my life."

Leila giggled. "Lead the way, Guy."

The myrmidon led the spy through the camp, and into the woods. Not so far as to be cut off from the army, but far enough for privacy.

"How have you been, Guy?" Leila asked.

Guy smiled. "Oh, not bad. I've just been training to fight that Karel we recently met."

Leila patted his back encouragingly. "I'm sure a guy like you can mop the floor with him."

A scream was suppressed.

They pair finally reached the place Matthew had directed Guy to. It was a shimmering pond with the last light of dusk on it, guarded on all sides by stalwart trees. Matthew stood, waiting for them.

"Let's hear it, Matthew," Leila said. She had a smile on her face, clearly expecting this outcome.

The spy took it in stride. He bent down on one knee, and ring in his hand. "Leila, I almost lost you in a forest because I couldn't protect you. Will you marry me, and never leave each other's side?"

Her smile grew. "Even though I can protect myself, I guess I'll say yes."

Matthew's jubilant laugh even made Guy shed a smile. He dashed to embrace his lady love. When they finally broke apart (And shared a few kisses), he turned to Guy.

"Guy, thank you for leading her here. You really are a guy I can rely on in any situation."

Guy died a lot inside.

"Matthew, why did I have to lead her here?" he protested. "I was expecting you to have some big extravagance planned for her that you needed time for!"

The spy in question scratched his head. "Well, I needed a guy to get me the time to practice what I had to say."

"You said two sentences."

"Two important sentences."

Guy sighed in defeat.

Matthew's smile grew. "Don't worry. If anyone asks, I'll make sure to tell them that you're a guy to be counted on."

Guy curled up into a ball on the ground.

Leila's mouth formed a devilish smirk. "Are you feeling okay, Guy? Don't worry, Matthew and I know a guy who can probably help."

Guy moaned.


Author Notes: I am proud of every one of those repetitive puns. Thank you, Hammer, for indirectly giving me this idea.