Long distance love

Disclaimer:- I don't own New Tricks nor the characters which is just as well or there'd be a lot more things that would mean it had to be shown later at night!

Pairing;- Sandra / ?

Rating:- M

Authors note:- This story contains adult material and is rated M for strong language and scenes of a sexual nature (as they say on the TV!) so if that's not your thing stop now !

Summary:- Sandra has been sent to a police conference in Cardiff and she's missing someone special but then that's what computers and instant messengers were made for right ? This is a three chapter story and the identity of Sandra's chat buddy is revealed in chapter 3 in the meantime happy guessing :)

Wednesday - 10.30am - Day 1

The room bustled with the inane chatter of over 100 police officers as Sandra stared out the window still silently sheathing that she was here at all. The last thing she needed was a course on team dynamics that would make no difference anyway. The long established dynamic of her team was that she gave them instructions, they agreed, she turned her back and they buggered off and did exactly what they pleased anyway! To the people in that room that would have seemed unconventional at best and poor leadership at worst but it worked for them and she thought that has been accepted by the powers that be. Now it appeared that had just been wishful thinking on her part.

As the speaker on the small raised podium rearranged his papers for the tenth time she felt her mobile vibrate quietly in her jacket pocket and reached for it not bothering to be discreet as no one else was paying attention to their lecturer either. Hitting the text message button she smiled to herself as the screen lit up with one new message from "trouble". When their relationship had changed she'd spent hours thinking of what name she should link to his number. She could of course just have left it as it was but given how prone she was to leaving her phone lying around and how prone others were to lifting it that had seemed risky. In the end with the realisation of how problematic their burgeoning relationship could be trouble had seemed like the most apt description. Even now when those around them knew that they were no longer just friends and colleagues she couldn't bring herself to change it. It meant more to her now than a simple covert nick name it was something that reminded her of when things were new between them. Not that even now their lives were ever boring, how could they be? Nor was there any less passion between them than there had been when they first started stealing moments of alone time and rushed expressions of their mutual lust. To her however it was special and she'd keep it.

"You've only been gone a few hours and I miss you already this place just it's right when you're not here xxxxx"

Reading the message again to imprint it on her mind for the boring morning that lay ahead she hit reply and typed quickly on the small touch screen.

"Well if it weren't for you I'd not be here at all just remember that! I mean what am I supposed to do tonight when all these guys are in the bar drinking themselves stupid and I'm all alone with nothing but a king sized bed with no one to share it with to look forward to! xxxxx"

Smiling she hit the send button knowing the message was sure to drive him mad for the rest of the day then turned the phone off and slipped it back into her pocket. It wasn't that he didn't trust her; he knew she would never be unfaithful to him, but he kept telling her how it got to him to see the way other men looked at her. He often ranted about how he knew exactly what they were thinking because he'd been thinking it for years, he'd mentally undressed her, imagined how it would be to hear her whisper his name in the throes of passion and he hated that they were doing it. A mild pang of guilt nudged at her chest and she considered turning her phone back on before it was swept away as the speaker started droning on again about leadership qualities and she was reminded that he was a large part of the reason she was there at all.

Wednesday – 7pm – Evening 1

Closing her hotel room door and leaning back against it Sandra sighed heavily. It had been a long day and she had a sinking feeling it was going to be a longer night. She had barely had a minute all day one seminar had rolled tediously into another with nothing but the shortest of breaks for floppy sandwiches and luck warm coffee in the middle of the day and now she had to change for dinner and go down and smile and make small talk with a crowd of people she had no desire to spend another second with.

Flopping onto the bed she sighed reaching into her jacket pocket and pulling out her phone. She hadn't intended to leave it off this long, she's meant to put it back on at lunch time and see what her very own bundle of trouble had to say for himself but it just hadn't happened. Now all she wanted was to hear his voice, to have him tell her that everything was ok at the office, that the place hadn't fallen apart without her and that, most of all, he was still missing her.

Pressing the on button she waited impatiently as the phone booted up then smiled as it flashed with warnings of 2 missed calls and 4 text messages. Confirming that the calls were from him she ignored them and switched immediately to the text messages.

"Well if I was there I'd make sure you put the king sized bed to good use but since I'm not just make sure none of those guys who will be gagging to get into it with you get a chance. Tell them you're boyfriend is very big and very strong and VERY jealous and he'll sort out anyone who tries to lay a finger on you! The guys say hi btw they miss you too apparently but not as much as me. xxxxxx"

Laughing aloud at the image of her acting like a 14 year old fending of the advances of all these guys he mistakenly imagined would find her irresistible by pointing out that her boyfriend would beat them up she flipped to the second message without replying to the first.

"I hope you ignored my last message because you're engrossed in what you're being told because the guys are going nuts here without you you'll need all the leadership skills you can get to get them back in line if this keeps up! It's been 7 hours since you left now and I'm having withdrawal symptoms so text me when you get this. xxxxx"

Sighing at the idea that as she'd predicted her team were running riot in her absence she felt a small smile cross her lips at the thought that he was so desperate to hear from her. They hadn't done the whole "I love you" bit, she didn't believe in it…actually if she was honest she was scared of it, to say those words meant it was real it was supposed to last and it was her experience that with those three words she had managed to kill most of her previous relationships. No this time she was happy to take each day at a time but she loved the fact that this time, the first time they'd spent more than a few hours out of contact, he seemed to be craving her as much as she was him.

Opening the third message the self-satisfied contentment she'd felt washing away the stresses of the day came to a shuddering halt as she realised it had been sent only an hour before and his playful, I miss you so much mood was gone.

"Sandra I wish you'd get back to me, I know you're the one that's always saying we shouldn't live in each other's pockets and that we're just taking each day as it comes but it's after 6 and you still haven't bothered to text me back. If you're getting these at all it'd be nice I you took a break from enjoying yourself to let me know you're ok."

Feeling her breathing get a little more ragged and panicked she flipped immediately to the last message her heart beat pounding in her ears.

"I miss you. I thought I'd say it again. Clearly the feeling isn't mutual I'll see you Friday night we can talk then."

Feeling tears sting the backs of her eyes she paced the floor her hands shaking as she scrolled through her contacts missing his number twice and having to scroll back she was in such a panic.

"Shit!" she shouted to the empty room "shit, shit, shit" this was what she got for even thinking the L word, who did she think she was being content, that wasn't her that wasn't her life. It was supposed to be a tease, something to make him think for an hour until she got a break and could ring him and remind him that she missed him too but it had backfired and now she had blown it, she knew she had.

Putting the phone to her ear she listened as it rang… and rang….. and rang before going to voice mail. She hung up and hit the redial button listening again as the same thing happened.

"It's me" she said quietly this time when the recorded message finished trying to keep her voice level, trying not to show how upset she was and knowing she was failing badly in that endeavour. "Sorry…..it's been mad here I…well….Call me…. I'm going down to dinner I have no choice the seminar organiser used to know my Dad and he's been trying to corner me all day so I can't get out of it…..anyway bye…." Pausing for a minute mid-sentence knowing that he would be able to hear the tears in her voice she added in a whisper "Oh and I miss you too."

Sitting on the edge of the bed she threw the phone on the duvet beside her and tried in vain to pull herself together. How could she have been so stupid, so complacent? Had she learned nothing in the 50 odd years she'd been on the planet? Never relax Sandra, never believe it's your turn to be happy, never trust, never trust anyone not even those you feel you should be able to trust with your life.

Twenty minutes late for dinner she was changed and had done the best job she could to hide misery behind a mask of make-up as she and stood in front of the mirror looking herself up and down. The fifties style pastel blue dress she wore had been a gift from him, something she had never expected but which he had proudly presented her with when he arrived the evening of their first "official" outing as a couple. She'd brought it because she'd wanted a part of him there with her even when she was forced to socialise, when other female officers commented on it she wanted to be able to say "yes it's gorgeous isn't it, it was a present from my partner", she'd wanted to see the look on their faces at the thought that someone cared enough about her to pick something that suited her so well. Now she wanted to wear it so that in her mind at least she knew that she was still committed even if she'd blown it with him. Reaching for her handbag she looked one more time at her phone before signing and dropping it inside. Taking a deep breath she reached for the door handle just as there was a gentle knock on the door and a clipped voice she recognised as the receptionist called;

"Detective superintendent Pullman I have a parcel that was delivered to reception for you."

When she opened the door the carefully coiffured reception beamed as she handed her a small rectangular box and informed her that the instructions from the courier were that she was to receive it before she went down to dinner,

"Unfortunately I only came on shift and I wasn't informed I'm sorry it's late." The pleasant young woman smiled adding "Gorgeous dress detective superintendent."

"Thank you, it was a gift from my…." Sandra replied before feeling the words catch in her throat and smiling weakly as she closed the door.

Sitting at the small dressing table in the room she turned the package over in her hands noting that it had been sent from London that morning at 11am guaranteed same day delivery before she ripped the paper from it and held the square jeweller's box in her trembling hand as the small white card fell onto her lap.

"I know you took the dress I thought this would go well with it. Just to remind you of me while men throw themselves at your feet. Miss you. Trouble xxxxx"

The trembling in her hand only increased as she opened the box and stared in amazement at the small turquoise heart shaped stone dangling on a delicate silver chain. It was spectacular and so much more than she deserved after what had happened today. Reaching for her bag she was determined to keep ringing him until he picked up when there was a more vigorous knock at the door and the loud voice of her father's long term friend called through it.

"Come on Sandra you're late for dinner and I've been waiting all day to get a good chin wag with you."

Lifting the necklace from the box she put it on and sighed deeply as she plastered on a fake smile and opened the bedroom door.

Wednesday - 9.30pm- Night 1

Walking through the hotel reception glad to have finally managed to extract herself from the evening's activities Sandra lifted her phone from her bag and glanced at it again before throwing it back in when she noted that it showed the same complete lack of activity it had all night. Her earlier panic had been slowly turning to a mixture of anger and dread all evening. She knew he was insecure, they both were , relationships had never been easy for either of them and they both had moments when they assumed that their happiness was never destined to last but the strong, independent side of her was now screaming that he had over reacted. Unfortunately it was still being drowned out by the vulnerable side of herself that feared loosing him and believed that was exactly what she'd done.

"Detective superintendent" the voice of the receptionists voice broke into her thoughts as she stood by the lift and she groaned at how close she had been to making a clean get away.

"Please call me Sandra," she replied as she turned trying not to show her disappointment "it's going to be a long couple of days and detective superintendent is way too much of a mouthful."

"Thank you I'm Judy," the young girl smiled before handing her an envelope "you had a call while you were at dinner we couldn't find you so I took a message."

"Ok" Sandra replied hoping the surge of hope that had overtaken her wasn't obvious in her face "thank you Judy"

Offering the other woman her warmest smile she turned to push the button on the lift only to realise that she still had company and turned again to see a nervous smile play across the younger woman's lips.

"I hope you don't mind me saying this Sandra." She said quietly clasping and unclasping her hands nervously. "But I noticed earlier that you were upset and I just wanted to say if it has anything to do with the person who left that message you have nothing to worry about. I took that call and he was desperate to speak to you, I don't think I've had so many questions about the wellbeing of a guest from anyone before. I tried to tell him I probably couldn't find you because you were in the bathroom or something and that I'd seen you just a short while before and you were fine but he was clearly worried about you. I only got off the phone by promising that I would personally make sure you got his message so... Well anyway like I said I hope you don't mind me saying but...well anyway I should get back to the desk."

Watching the girl leave as the lift dinged behind her Sandra felt like she'd been hit by a bus, a mixture of hope and confusion washing over her. Stepping into the lift she hit the button for her floor before opening the cream coloured envelope with shaking hands.

"I'm sorry, I miss you, it turned me into a bastard, forgive me?"

The words on the card inside brought tears to her eyes as she leaned back on the mirrored wall of the lift and sighed.

10 minutes later, changed into a fine cotton sleep shirt she grabbed her phone from her handbag and hit the on button on her laptop positioning it on the bed and sitting crossed legged in front of it with the mound of hotel pillows behind her.

The screen burst into life and as she was about to dial his number to finally put an end to the evening of torture she'd just endured an instant message box popped up in the middle of the screen.

Trouble:- I've been waiting for you, I'm sorry Sandra I was a bastard, I was missing you, I was jealous, I couldn't stand the thought of you there with all those guys and me here going home to a house without you in it. Forgive me?

Smiling she dropped the phone beside her and thought carefully about how she should reply. She could just ring him but she was becoming more and more convinced that they needed to talk and that might be easier if they couldn't actually hear each other's voices.

DSISexKitten:- it was my fault too I didn't mean to ignore you all day I miss you too and there isn't a guy here that could make me forget that even if they were interested which I promise you they weren't! The only person who thinks I'm somehow irresistible to anything in trousers is you.

Hitting the send button she laughed softly as she spotted her screen name at the beginning of the message. He'd set up the instant messenger a few months before when their relationship was still a secret and she'd had her mother to stay preventing them from spending much time together in the evenings as they had become used to. She had hated the moniker he had selected for her. He'd informed her that she was his sex kitten and he liked it so after several attempts to get him to change it she'd given up.

Trouble:- and the only person who can't see how irresistible you are is you! I shouldn't have gone off like I did though, having to get through today without seeing you or hearing you voice made me realise how much you make my days, well my life actually, better and I panicked. How's the leadership training going?

DSISexKitten:- how do you think? I've never been more bored in my life. You know I feel the same don't you? That my life is a thousand times better now that I have you I was so scared I'd lost you when I got your messages I don't know what I'd do if that ever happened.

As the message duplicated itself in the chat box Sandra felt her chest tighten, they didn't do this, they didn't say these sort of things to each other and she couldn't work out if she was relieved that they were now or even more scared at what it all meant. Could she really let go enough to admit that she didn't want to imagine her life without him? More importantly if she did would it just lead to disaster. Staring at the screen as he seemed to be taking forever to answer the fatalist side of her brain was laughing ironically and mocking her with the realisation that it was probably the later.

Trouble:- Sandra you just don't get it do you? Jesus for such a smart woman you can be really thick sometimes. You couldn't lose me if you tried, I'm going nowhere, don't you see that yet? Can't you see yet that I love you? That I'm IN LOVE with you?

Her heart pounded so hard against her chest that it felt like she might explode. What was he doing, how could he say that, he knew how she felt about it, he knew how it scared her.

DSISexKitten:- Don't! Don't say that!

Sending the only thing her fingers seemed able to type she felt a single tear roll down her check, how could he? That was it everything would fall apart now hadn't she proved that earlier? She'd allowed herself to momentarily think the word love and everything had gone to shit now he was actually saying it!

Trouble:- Why not? Because it scares you? Well prepare to be scared a lot from now on because I swear that I will never let another day go by without saying it. I'll keep saying it until you realise I mean it and that because I LOVE YOU I'm going to be right by your side showing you every day for the rest of our lives. Today has made me realise that this one day at a time shit is rubbish. It's shown me that I never want a day to go by of my life that you aren't part of and if that scares you Sandra I'm sorry but it's the way it is. Now tell me you don't feel the same because I think you do and I think it's time you stopped letting the past hold what we have back, hell if I can you can don't you think?

She couldn't think straight, she couldn't reply, she couldn't do anything but stare at the screen as her thoughts pulled her in 12 different directions at once. This wasn't supposed to happen, she'd never thought being with him would be easy but she'd not seen this coming. Suddenly she was shaken from her stupor by the ringing of her phone and as she lifted it and saw his name she knew this was it she could accept things for what they were and let go, or she could fight him on this and probably blow things completely. Hitting the connect button she listened silently as his voice filled her ear.

"Sandra? Talk to me" he said in the quiet soothing voice that she had grown to consider her solace from the outside world. "I'm not going to apologise for falling in love with you, I'm not going to say sorry for the fact that you've become the most important thing in my life but I am sorry if it scares you. Talk to be sweetheart, tell me you feel the same or even tell me you don't just say something."

"We don't do this" she whispered trying to force herself to say something more profound, something that would show him that she knew what he meant that she did feel it too she just didn't want to say those words.

"Well I think it's time we started doing it." He continued as she pushed the lap top away and stretched out on the bed closing her eyes and letting his voice wash over her. "Do you realise what it's been like for me today? There hasn't been a minute of the day that I haven't been thinking about you. The office seemed empty I wanted to go into your office and sit at your desk just to feel closer to you, I even brought you a bloody sandwich at lunch time because for a few minutes when I went out to get the lunches I forgot that you weren't there, you can imagine how that went down with the boys can't you?"

"Aww did they tease you?" she asked with a gentle laugh as some of the tension that was knotting every muscle in her body dissipate.

"Damn right they teased me" He snapped with an edge of irritation to his voice that she knew was aimed squarely at their colleagues rather than her. "But that's not the point the point is that it was just one small thing today that made me realise that I'm sick of this lets take one day at a time shit Sandra. It's been months and it's only getting better why can't we just accept that it might have taken a few years but we've finally got here, that this is where we belong, that it's ok to admit that we're in love?"

"Because it's too big, it's too much, it only ever leads to things falling apart baby you know that as well as I do." Sandra sighed wishing they were having this conversation face to face but also being glad that they weren't so he couldn't see the turmoil she was in.

"This isn't going to fail Sandra." He said with a conviction she was starting to believe he truly felt. "Do you love me?"

"You know I do, you said as much a few minutes ago, you know how I feel."

"Then say it." He continued the imploring tone of his voice gripping her heart like a vice. "Let me hear it Sandra tell me you love me."

"Why isn't it enough that you know its how I feel?" she asked "Why isn't t enough that you know that I'm lying here 200 miles away craving you like I've never craved anyone in my life? That I wish more than anything on earth that you were here right now holding me, touching me, making love to me and making everything else disappear like you do every other day of my life? Can't that be enough? If you mean what you're saying can't you wait till I'm ready to go there, to take that step when you know how much it scares me?"

"Ok…..ok I'm sorry" he sighed "I didn't mean to push you sweetheart I know it's a big thing for you and it is enough that I know how you feel, tis enough for me to know you're not going anywhere either, for now."

"Thanks you, I'll never know what I did to deserve you but whatever it was I'm grateful." Sandra smiled "So what was happening at the office? Anything I should know?"

"The usual ." he replied as she heard him sigh deeply too and knew for the moment the tension was past. "but I don't want to talk about them right now I want to talk about you and that huge king sized bed you've got all to yourself!"

"It's horrible" she laughed sitting up and closing the laptop down before setting it on the floor and stretching out in the middle of the bed as if to demonstrate her point. "It's too big for one person it's torture to be in it without you."

"You're tortured?" he scoffed "imagine what it's like fore me I'm in a bed that not only feels too big without you but that if I roll the wrong way I can still smell your shampoo off the other pillow that's proper torture you don't even want to know the things that have been going through my head all evening while you were being wined and dined."

"Tell me." She whispered allowing the relaxed, seductive edge to return to her voice as she heard him breathe deeply on the other end of the phone. "Tell me what you've been thinking why should you suffer alone?"

"You are a wicked woman Sandra Pullman you know that don't you?"

"Yes but that's one of the things you like about me now tell me, what have you been thinking about, what have you been doing to me in that sordid imagination of yours?"

"I want to make love to you. I want to make you cum so hard it takes your breath away. I want to do exactly what we did last night but I want to do it slower, I want to tease you, torture you until you're begging me to make love to you. I want to remind you that outside you may be the bad ass DSI but when we're alone you are all mine."

"Tell me how, tell me slowly, how would you torture me?" she gasped feeling every nerve in her body come alive at the memory of the frenzied, hard, desperate night of passion they'd shared before she left and longing, like he was, to relive those feelings in a way that they could savour.

"What are you wearing?" He whispered his voice raspy with the desire she knew matched her own as she told him about the short sleep shirt that barely covered her ass and the black lacy knickers that were all that were covering the areas she wished he was there to touch. "Undo the buttons on your shirt, if I have to tell you what I'm thinking I want to know you're feeling it as well as hearing it."

"What?" Sandra gasped being pulled back to reality for a moment by his comment.

"I want you to do what I'm telling you to do I want your hands to be mine for now until I can do it myself, you wanted me to make the world go away so let me do it. Don't tell me you've never done it because I know you have." He replied the challenge in his tone clear as she smiled and followed his instructions setting the phone down for a second while she pulled the sleep shirt over her head and dropped her underwear over the side of the bed. "Are you naked?"

"Yes" She replied "are you?"

"This isn't about me remember" he replied "it's about you doing what you're told so close your eyes and listen. You're body drives me mad, no matter when I see you, dressed or undressed it makes me want to pin you to the nearest wall and remind you what you do to me but I love it most when you are just like you are now, naked in front of me and all mine. I want to lie beside you and take you in my arms feel you skin against mine as I kiss you, feel the way that your lips melt into mine as I run my hands down your back feeling the perfection of your skin under my fingers. Can you feel it Sandra, can you feel my lips, my hands, are you with me?"

"Oh god yes." Sandra muttered her free hand involuntarily resting on her stomach as he continued to talk, telling her how he was resting her back onto the bed again, lavishing her neck in kisses before reaching her breasts taking first one and then the other in his hands rolling her nipples between his fingers and listening to the low moans he knew she'd be making.

"Do it for me sweetheart, let me hear it." He whispered as she followed his lead, gently caressing her breasts imagining it was him, that he was there with her instead of so far away, "what do you want Sandra tell me how it feels tell me what you want me to do."

"It feels amazing, it always feels amazing when you touch me." She replied her words ragged with the desire that was reaching fever pitch now "I want you, I want to feel your weight on me, I want you inside me making love to me, making my head spin the way it always does when we're together."

"You'll have to do it for me this time imagine my hand sliding the length of your body, my head buried between your legs as mu hands caress your thighs, my tongue teasing you bringing you to the edge then making you wait." He continued as she did as he asked her fingers teasing her clit sending shock waves through her body that she'd never felt when doing this on her own before. "Cum for me Sandra, let me hear that sound, the one that haunts my dreams when you're not here, the one that makes me want to make you do it again and again. Are you close? Tell me how it feels."

"Oh god…oh yes I'm…."She tried to say, her words coming out breathy and jumbled as she was over taken by waves of pleasure that tore at the edges of her senses making the word spin and his name echo around the room as it fell from her lips in a tortured scream.

"Jesus Sandra I love that I can do that to you." He muttered smugly in her ear as she came down from her high, her body still trembling from the force of it.

"Well you can and I think it's only fair that I return the favour." She replied in a voice so laced with contentment and exhaustion that it didn't even sound like hers.

"Not tonight my darling." He laughed. "I think we've had quite enough excitement for one day don't you? Tomorrow night maybe, for now sleep, you have another long day tomorrow."

"Ok" she agreed pulling the comforter over her and yawning "but definitely tomorrow night no maybe about it."

"Ok sleep well sweetheart." He sighed "and Sandra remember, I love you."

"I know." she replied sleep catching her too quickly for her liking "and I do feel the same you know, I promise."