REUPLOAD
DISCLAIMER:i unfortunately don't own my chemical romance or anything that belongs to them this is my first fanfic, its poorly written because Ive written this on notebook which doesn't have spell check so my grammars crap, please review and let me know if you like it :)
The High School Life Is Gonna Kill You
Chapter 1
Hazel POV
"RAY, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE" I called from my room, that curly nob head was in deep shit. "You called Sis?"running through the door, Ray said panting. "You've stolen my green day album already?!" i whined, hitting his arm. " Sorry sis, you know i cant resist being an American idiot" Ray replied laughing and scruffling my hair. "I'm amazed Mom let you do that to your hair he continued. My hair was meant to be curly like my brothers but around a couple of months i got chemical straightening, bleached the crap out of it then dyed it atomic blue. I loved it, it was amazing, unique, just the way i wanted it. And then i thought of mom and i got a little teary. Ray noticed this and pulled me into hug. "I know its hard Hazel but you've got me and dad now remember?" Ray soothed as i cried into his Queen top.
When i was 11, my parents got divorced. Dad and Ray moved to Belleville, New Jersey whilst Mom and me moved to New York. Me and Ray had the odd phone called but i never got to see him. 4 months ago, Mom got diagnosed with cancer. Whilst going through chemo, all her hair started to abandon her body, she told me to do whatever i wanted with me hair, because one day i may just lose it all. She was soggy from the chemo all the time and her lips chapped. Two weeks ago i went to her room to give her her painkillers and she just lied there, slowly breathing. I knew i was losing her. I got into her bed hugged her for ages, begging her not to go. Then she said I Love You Hazel and Your brother,
i always will. I whispered back i love you mom, So long and Goodnight. I kissed her on the cheek, tears rolling down both our cheeks and she smiled. And in that moment, she was gone.
My mom had just died in my arms.
i didn't know what to do.
I laid there with mom still in my arms for an hour, i wasn't ready to say goodbye yet, so i just continued to stay with her until she went cold. I kissed her and said goodbye and called the hospital. Hoping they knew what to do.
They took her into the van and i collapsed, crying. I went in and called Ray we talked and cried for hours. I went and sorted her stuff, i didn't want it just staying there, haunting me. I went to into her wardrobe, picking out her favourite outfit, a black and red long dress. It was easy to understand why she loved it, it was beautiful. I knew that's the only thing she wanted to be buried in. As pulled out the dress, 3 letters fell out, one to dad, one to ray and one to me.
Dear Hazel,
I'm so sorry that i will never be able to see you before your prom, when you pass your driving test, your wedding day and when your first child is born. I'm so disappointed that i wont ever be able to see those moments.
Although i wont be there, i will be in spirit.
You will be moving in with your brother and starting again in Belleville, you've missed so much school, you need an education. Its all been arranged with your father. Keep the hair, i love it.
Thank you for everything and im sorry for what Ive put you through.
I love you and i always will all my love Mom xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I sat on her bed, under her clothes and just laid there, smelling her perfume and soon fell asleep.
Suddenly there was a knock at the door, it was ray and dad. i hugged ray for ages, i didn't want to let go. Dad sorted all the legal crap and depressing shit. I kept my Xanax with me at all times, since mom got cancer, they had helped a lot. Mom funeral was beautiful, the church had red and black ribbons and roses all around, she was in her favourite dress. Her gravestone read "Helena Toro, mother and a fighter, she will be in our hearts and mind forever" will roses craved into the tomb. Its just what she wanted, she was buried in all her favourite colours. After her funeral me ray and dad got on a plane with all my stuff and moms perfumes, i didn't want to lose her completely.
So here i am now, 16, in Belleville New Jersey, in my new room in a house with my brother and dad, unpacking my stuff, crying into my brothers top, starting high school in a week.
I'm screwed.
