Riku's Survival Guide

By: Who do you think wrote the story?

Disclaimer: I own the foundation of the future site of the Riku's country, but I don't own the citizens yet. laughs

Note: I am the REAL Riku

G'evenin' ladies an' gents, this is ya cap'in speakin'. T'day will be our very first encoun'er with wat we down und'a like ta call "highschoo'" Well ok... mayba ev'ybo'y calls it that... but for a mat'r of fact... I'm not rea'ly down und'a like you might think. I'm simply a schoo' part'icipant who's been practicing the Brit'ish acc'ent. So now that ya'll know that I am cap'able of fooling ya, I'll start to talk like we do down here. (Not that it's any better) Ok, back to talking to you like the real me... I'm going to try to put together a nice highschool guide for you nice people so that when some random dude walks up to you and kicks you right dag in the shin you know how to react. I will be walking you through the meaningless predicaments that bake your potato and just plain piss you off... with examples. Fine I'll tell you the truth, I am gonna make you listen to how my school days go from good, bad, to worst. But did I make you feel all good about yourself when you thought I was making a story just for you? I thought so. Anyways if you ever read the titles of what you're... reading (duh-huh) then you should know who I am and what I'm capable of. If you're one of those brain dead wannabes who pick random stories and read them just to fit in with the more popular and better looking () social standards... STOP READING MY LIFE YOU DILUTED FREAK!

HINT ONE: the first day of school is the most important time to make a great impression. So, you should always try to wear nice, clean cut, designer branned if possible, clothes. But since Riku isn't as rich as people might think I am... I will wear a nice silver shirt with a pair of khaki pants to go along with it. Now for the difficult part... finding them. -.- So... where would be the best place to find these items in my room. I would usually say the closet but... I'm a boy, and guys don't really believe in closets. NO! Ok... let us begin in our search. Not under the bed, in the dresser, on closet floor. Where could it be!

"MOM! HAVE YOU SEEN MY KHAKIS!" I'm now desperate.

"YOU PLACED THEM IN THE LIVINGROOM THE OTHER DAY FOR SCHOOL!"

Oh yeah! So now I must run to the livingroom... but first I must race myself! Ready, Set, GO!

—–————LATER——————

AH HA! I win! I was almost two feet behind me when I crossed the finish line! Your pitiful small minds wouldn't be able to comprehend the significance of what I just said. But anyways... I see my clothes! They have been ironed and neatly placed on the side of the couch. Ok... I didn't do that part. I'll thank mom later. Well.. Now to dress... I know you are just DYING to hear step-by-step how I clothe myself... but that would be a bit odd.

—–————LATER——————

Ok I got clothes on. HINT TWO: where you sit on the bus is also important. The people who sit on front of the bus are usually geeks, lazy, and have little self-esteem. (If you sit on the front of the bus... I'm just kidding they're the nicest people in the world... DON T HIT ME!) The people who sit in the very back of the bus are usually loud, obnoxious, jocks, and the ones who think they better than everyone else. (Again... DON'T HURT ME!) So, my hint is to grab a seat towards the middle and more so to the back than the front. Unless your like me and usually have an assigned seat behind the bus driver, then it's ok to sit there... because you have no choice anyways. I think I'll wait until the last second to run to the bus stop... and they would wait for me even if they were pulling away because... I'm Riku remember? So like I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me, (GAH!) I am NOT, LET ME REPEAT, AM NOT, EGOCENTRIC! Hey lookie the bus is pulling in. Now for my super sexy ninja dash towards the bus. What? Didn't you know I have been secretly studying the ways of the ninjas? Ninjutsu is the name! I will be the next Sasuke. Anyways... bus.. Right... RUN!

—–————LATER——————

So I missed the bus... big deal... it's not a cool place to be anyways. But it's a heck of a lot cooler than to be dropped off in front of seniors by your MOM. Oh gosh... she's gonna do it to... just leave me in front of them to be beaten the first day. They're gonna throw me down Freshman Hill already! I must do something.

"Mom... Uh... my class is on that building." Our school is made up of buildings A-G.

"Oh hunney, I thought you said C-Building was were your home room is?" She's looking at me.

"Um.. Did I? I thought I said Kairi's home room is on C-Building?" Please buy it!

"Oh. Sorry dear... It's too early. Which building is it then?" With that she's turning the wheel.

"Uhm..." I gotta think of a building far enough away from seniors... and anyone else. "Just drop me off on G-Building" I'm gonna have a L-O-N-G walk.

—–————LATER——————

She just dropped me a G-Building and now's the fun part. I have been planning this since she turned the wheel. I am about to attempt my very own marathon. I shall call it... "The Riku Dash." Hehe... I think I shall hurry before class starts.

—–————LATER——————

HINT THREE: Don't lie if your afraid of being beat up and/or fighting someone in the early school year. When your afraid... tell whomever your with you don't feel well and need to go home (not recommended) and when you don't wanna get in a fight... then be a little nice sometimes you rude, rude person you!. Hehe. Anyways... I'm gonna go ahead a meet my new classmates. I'll talk to you again whenever I see it most fit.

—–END–—

You know I love the little lines that run from one side of the page to the other... it's just so fun to do. Ya'no! I do. I always know what I'm talking about. Didn't you know that? I have too much free time... For example look at figure 1-2 (a.k.a. the later things) Anyways... review... blah blah blah... or else... blah blah blah. Larc 'En Ciel is a great band!