Masks

Elise wakes up in the middle of the night with wet tears running down her cheeks and the Kurain master's talisman heavy against her skin, settled in the valley between her breasts. She's been dreaming of her daughters again.

She sits upright in the bed, the sheets only covering her to her hips. She barely thinks of the man whose arm is wrapped around her waist until a cool breeze wafts in through the open window, chilly against her bare chest and for the first time since waking, she doesn't feel numb. Instead she feels lonely, everyone important in her life gone, the body lying next to her providing nothing but warmth and a shell for the man who is chasing the same insipid dream that she is.

The only regrets Elise has about leaving her daughters behind is that she wasn't around to see them grow up, and that she was not there to keep them safe. If Elise had never left, Mia wouldn't have died.

It is only now, only in the middle of the night when she is alone except for the gentle snores of the man lying next to her, that she is allowed to think of herself as Misty: a mother without her daughters, which, in reality, is no mother at all.

That is why, when she had first heard of the danger facing Maya, Misty had agreed to help, no matter how convoluted the plan had seemed. Both she and the man who calls himself Godot need to save Maya for the same reason – because both of them had failed Mia. Misty's hand creeps up to the talisman resting against her chest and she touches it softly, well aware of the memory it contains. It's so close now – Misty can tell that everything will end soon, and either they will succeed, or they will fail again. But no matter what happens, Misty knows she is too ashamed to face her daughter as her mother. Her daughter will only see her as Elise Deauxnim, a picture book author that she has probably not even heard of.

Misty's been lost in her thoughts for so long now that she barely notices the soft red glow filling the room, streaming from the softly humming mask on the bedside table. Does he feel safe at night? Misty wonders, looking down at the gentle smile of the sleeping man. Does he feel safe like she does, to take his mask off and be nothing more than who he really is, Diego Armando, the man who had loved her daughter?

While the mask allows Diego to see (but not everything, Misty remembers), the real mask Diego wears is the mask of a man named Godot, a man who pretends to be stronger than he really is, the very same way Misty would like to pretend she never had daughters – the guilt never leaves, but night-time, as Misty, is the only time she allows herself to cry.

The man beside her stirs, his hand unwrapping itself from her body, rubbing at his weary eyes. And then his hands are on Misty's hips again, fumbling not only in the darkness of his room, but also that of his sight. His hands slip down Misty's thighs gently. "Mia?" he breathes and Misty hears her daughter's name from her lover's lips. For now, Misty is grateful that Godot is blind: that without his visor, he will never be able to see the new tears that the single word has caused.

She shrugs his hands off her gently, and he provides little resistance. Then Misty rolls over and shifts so she is leaning over him. She grabs his shoulders firmly, and in Elise's voice she murmurs, "Godot." Even though she knows his name, she never calls him Diego.

The man mumbles as he tries to comprehend his surroundings, deciding not to touch the woman on him now but reaching out for the visor on the bedside table. Misty relents, handing the visor to him and helping him slip it on. Misty hopes that with the minimal light that the visor provides that Godot will see that she's not Mia, but rather, Misty, or…

"…Elise," Godot answers, trying to sit up, and Misty moves back to her side of the bed. They sit in silence for a moment, the quiet slightly too tense to be companionable. They need each other, Misty knows, not only to save Maya, but to save themselves.

Then Godot moves his hand to Misty's chest, not running over her breasts as it had been earlier that evening, but instead, resting gently atop the talisman she always wears. The silence is not broken, but the tension is. For now, Misty is not Misty anymore – Godot is awake and it will be morning soon.

They lie together, wearing their masks: Misty is Elise, and Diego is Godot.