Author: MegTDJ
Category: Missing scene; humour
Rating: K+
Pairing: Daniel/Janet UST
Spoilers: Urgo
Summary: Urgo puts Daniel in an awkward position. #21 in the Love Comes Softly series.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1, its universe and its characters are not mine. The story itself is, however, so please don't archive without my permission.
Author's notes: I hate Urgo. My mom absolutely adores him and mimics him every chance she gets, so that kind of put me off the episode after a while, heh. But I've always felt it's the perfect episode to write a Dan/Jan missing scene for, so... here it is! Believe me, it wasn't fun for me to actually write him after trying to avoid him for so long... ;)
Many thanks to Misty and Kerri, without whom I would probably never have forced myself to write this. ;)
(Additional note: This was written in 2006, uploaded to FFnet in 2008.)
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Subliminal Messaging
Daniel gritted his teeth and tried to focus on his work rather than the constant chatter coming from his new companion.
"Daniel? Yoo-hoo! Are you even listening to me? Come on, it's no fun if you don't play along!"
"I don't want to play, Urgo," Daniel said with a sigh. "I told you, I'm trying to work."
"But work is so boring! Don't you think it's boring?"
"No."
"Wouldn't you rather play I Spy?"
"No."
"Twenty Questions?"
"No."
"Hide and Seek?"
Daniel thought about this for a moment. "Yes. That's a good idea, Urgo. We can play Hide and Seek. You go and hide somewhere, and I'll come and find you."
Urgo looked momentarily excited, but then he stopped to consider what Daniel had just said. "Aha!" he said, pointing his finger at Daniel. "Ahahaha! Clever, very clever, Mister Doctor Daniel Jackson. I almost fell for it, too! Haha, you were trying to play a trick on me!"
Daniel rolled his eyes and groaned as Urgo chuckled and chortled and then went back to asking a million questions about the things scattered around Daniel's office. It was never going to end, he realized. This was hell, and he was going to be here for the rest of eternity.
"What is hell?" Urgo asked curiously.
Daniel was about to give him a detailed description and directions when he heard footsteps approaching his office.
High-heeled footsteps.
"Oh, look, here's the little doctor!" Urgo said, clapping his hands and giving an excited little hop. "Aww, isn't she cute?"
Daniel could feel his face heating up with embarrassment, even though he knew Janet couldn't hear what Urgo was saying. He tried not to think anything that Urgo could use against him, and forced a smile for Janet's benefit. "Hey, Janet," he said. "What brings you here?"
"I just came to see how you were doing," she said almost nonchalantly as she walked over to his desk. Daniel could see, however, that she was examining him as closely as she could without the aid of an MRI.
As she spoke, Urgo sidled up beside Daniel and waggled his eyebrows. "I think she likes you, Daniel," he said. "I think she reeeeally likes you!"
Daniel would have welcomed a hole in the floor right about then.
"So... how are you?" Janet asked.
"Fine," Daniel said, perhaps a little too cheerfully. "Urgo's not even here. I think he's with... Sam or Jack or... maybe Teal'c..." He could have kicked himself for stumbling over his words.
"Liar," Urgo said. Then he giggled and added, "You like her, too, don't you? Haha! They like each other!"
Daniel didn't need to put any effort into keeping his mind blank this time. His brain went strangely numb at Urgo's announcement while it tried to figure out whether to be angry, embarrassed, or amused by it.
"That's good," Janet was saying, though Daniel found it hard to focus on her voice. "I was... Daniel? Are you sure you're okay?"
Daniel was holding his breath in an attempt to resist snapping at Urgo for snickering in his ear, but suddenly he realized that this was probably coming across to Janet as strange. "Yeah," he said, letting his breath out with a whoosh. "Just, um..."
"Why don't you kiss her?" Urgo said, and then stifled his giggles with both hands over his mouth.
"I, um..."
"Oh, go on," Urgo pressed, removing his hands from his mouth to wave them excitedly in the air. "Kiss her! I've never kissed a pretty lady before. I wonder what that feels like?"
"Daniel?" Janet said, reaching out a concerned hand to touch Daniel's arm.
"Uh!" Daniel jumped up from his chair in surprise at the sudden wave of electricity that flowed through his arm at the touch. "You know, I uh... I just remembered, I'm supposed to meet Sam right about now for, uh..."
"Kiss her! Pleeeeease? Pretty pretty please? You know you want to..."
"Will you SHUT UP?!"
The room fell silent.
Daniel winced when he realized what he'd done. His outburst had had the desired effect of shutting Urgo up, but it had also made Janet stare at him like he'd just grown another head. An ugly, nasty head.
"Sorry," he said. "He... came back."
Janet nodded slowly, but the look on her face didn't change. "I see. Maybe I should... leave the two of you alone, then."
Daniel could feel Urgo pushing at his subconscious, and it was all he could do to stop himself from moving towards Janet, taking her in his arms, and...
"That would probably be a good idea," he said in a strained voice. He couldn't remember a time when he'd felt more humiliated, and that was saying something.
Janet moved slowly towards the door, turning back every two steps to give him another odd look. When she was finally gone, Daniel let out a breath and sank back into his chair.
"I can't believe you just let her go like that," Urgo said in the closest thing to a pout that his bouncy personality could achieve. "I knew you were boring, but I didn't know you were... were... well, that boring!"
Daniel groaned and buried his face in his hands. "Then please, go find someone else to humiliate," he said, defeated at last. "Sam's probably doing something interesting. Go annoy her."
When a few seconds passed without a reply, Daniel peeked through his fingers at the place where Urgo had been standing. He was gone.
Daniel dropped his hands from his face and looked all around his office. Not a sign of Urgo to be found. "Thank God," he sighed, finally feeling able to relax.
But relaxed and Urgo-free or not, somehow he couldn't get Janet's face out of his mind long enough to get any work done. When he caught himself actually wondering what it would be like to kiss her, he shook his head and laughed. "I can't believe I'm actually giving in to this," he muttered. "I don't feel that way about Janet!"
He sighed and gave his head another sharp shake as he prepared to get back to work. "Just goes to show what subliminal messaging can do."
The End