Author's Note: This is my first attempt at an Inu-Yasha fan fiction of any
sort. Any other fan fictions were created as a one-shot because I didn't
like the ending of a particular series. They never surfaced, and won't for
many reasons. Be gentle on me, I know my writing is horrid.
Another note? I am trying very, VERY hard to fix the format. I have no idea what happened. I didn't read the note on the tags for one thing. Another, since I'm worried about the tags a -- is the beginning or end of a thought or a memory (example: --this is a thought--). I don't know how it's double spaced or why chapter two is cut off, but everything will be fixed shortly. Thanks to everyone who's already reviewed! ~exsanguination
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Inu-Yasha rolled over and moaned melodramatically.
"Inu-Yasha, stop! If you keep moving around, you'll hurt yourself more and I won't be able to dress your wounds." Kagome sat up with irritation, crossing her arms over her chest.
"I never asked you to," he shot back. Kagome gave him a nasty look before he swallowed his pride and went back to laying on his stomach. He did, however, mumble under his breath. Kagome let it slide, understanding his aggressive personality through her own. Instead, she focused her energy on wondering, yet again, what to do about her friend's transformations from half-demon to full-blooded demon.
He was getting worse every time. He didn't recognize his fellow friends anymore. He'd nearly killed her. She'd been attacked and nearly killed many a-time in this era. It didn't phase her nearly as much as it did before. But this was Inu-Yasha. It was different having to flee from him, watch as his claws went after her. Had Sessomaru not shown up when he had..
"Why do you insist on leaving him injured and vulnerable? You want to kill him so badly, why not do it? If not for you, another demon could easily come along and take the opportunity. Would you mind explaining your strange behavior? Or could it be your affections for living creatures have grown? Don't expect we haven't noticed the child who follows you without question.." Miroku had been defiant this time again. His dark eyes disappeared under the slits of his eyelids. So much that Sessomaru almost missed Miroku's disdainful and untrusting stare.
"My answer, monk, has not changed. I wish to slay my brother, but not until he knows himself once more. If he must kill the girl, I want those same circumstances to apply." Inu-Yasha's brother was every bit as cold and hateful towards Miroku as Miroku was to him.
"What about the girl called Rin?"
"I have no affections for the girl. She is merely a servant to me."
"I thought you had no wish for human help. Was it not you who told Inu- Yasha that under no circumstances, even as one lay dying, should a demon accept human aide?"
"I gave you my answer. I have more important matters to attend to. Come, Jaken." With his icy, calm remark, he turned on his heel and walked away. Jaken ambled behind him.
Kagome sighed, trying to understand. Why had Sessomaru, again and again, insisted on testing the depths of Inu-Yasha's murderous demonic rages? He was only pushing Inu-Yasha to do the exact opposite of what he was implying what he wanted to happen. Making him lose his human aspects only made it that much easier to lose himself again.
"OUCH! Dammit, Kagome, do those remedies have to hurt that MUCH?"
"Sorry," she muttered. She continued to apply antiseptic to his back, before wrapping it in bandages.
"I like it, myself," Miroku said. "They work just as well as anything we have. But we need not waste the time preparing them. They're already ready, put into little cans and tubes. Besides, with Sango applying them- He was cut short with a quick blow to the head from Sango.
"Spare me."
Miroku grinned and threw Kagome a wink. Kagome laughed, to the confusion of both Sango and Inu-Yasha. She wondered when Miroku would finally win Sango over. When he would finally learn that lechery would not get him what he desired.
"Inu-Yasha?"
"What?"
"Don't you remember anything?" She cocked her head to the side, letting her midnight hair fall in her face.
"No. I don't. What's the big deal about it?" He sulked, wishing they'd just shut up already. They never actually came out and said what needed to be said. He'd had it up to here with every one of them. It was getting damn annoying. "If you want to say something, just say it, all right?" He was nearly at growling level. Sango jumped and Kagome glared.
Miroku took a deep breath and started in. "Inu-Yasha, when you transform and become a full demon, you are even more aggressive, powerful, and formidable than you are at current, correct?"
"Yeah, so what?"
"However, unlike most demons, you do not distinguish allies from foes and go after whoever happens to be standing in your way. In this case, Inu- Yasha, the one standing in your way was Kagome."
Inu-Yasha's heart skipped a beat. Kagome?
"Wh-what happened?"
"Sessomaru stepped in and stopped you."
"What!?"
"Don't act as if you did not hear me, Inu-Yasha."
Kagome continued the story. "He said that if you were to be killed by him or.." she swallowed hard. "Or if you were to kill me, he said he wanted you to know yourself. Not to be what you were. And not know who you were." Kagome's voice was cracking, and they all noticed. Inu-Yasha twisted his aching back in time to see Kagome blink back tears. It hurt him to see.
Again, the doubts of being a full-fledged demon started in on his mind. He'd always wanted to be a full demon, save for the time spent being with Kikyou. But that power wasn't supposed to be as malevolent, hateful, or murderous. His powers weren't supposed to be used for purely slaughter, with not distinction between evil and good. And now, now he'd almost lost Kagome because of this horrible transformation.
Kagome sat back, done with fixing him up with her strange medicines and wrapping his wounds. She pulled her knees to her chest, hugging herself tight.
"Inu-Yasha, STOP!" she'd yelled, watching his claws rip through the leader of the band of thieves. A small girl, much like Rin, cowered in fear off to the corner of the tiny room. Innocent and helpless, but also in the wrong place at the wrong time. She didn't deserve death, nor did she deserve this sight as a memory. Much like, but not the same, as Kohaku's memories.
He had turned to her then, suddenly and frightfully, his dark eyes full of a menace and hate. A menace and hate he didn't even hold for Naraku, the evil bastard who'd torn all their lives to Hell.
He came at her, holding up his blood-stained claws, poised to strike her. She called out in fear, but did not budge. Her head was held high, with tears so full of torment that the sight broke Miroku and Sango's hearts.
"Inu-Yasha, please.."
"Inu-Yasha!"
The names were called at the same moment, but the louder and more spiteful of the two won Inu-Yasha's attention. Clad in billowy, decorated white robes and spiked armor stood the very brother who despised Inu-Yasha with every fiber of his being. No greater pleasure would be found than in his death. Kagome felt an even deeper fear than her own death. That being Inu- Yasha's.
"Sessomaru, please, don't! Don't hurt him!"
"Your insolence is most irritating. Shut your mouth, filthy wench, or would you prefer death at his hands?"
"I don't care what happens to me as long as you leave him alone!"
Sessomaru merely gazed at her with his icy stare. She did baffle him, however. Did this young human girl truly prefer to die instead of seeing his brother, a worthless mix of the two races, die instead? However, she need not worry. For the time being. It was not his time to die. He chuckled on the inside, leaving an eerily placid look on the outside.
"I do not intend to take his life yet, stupid woman."
The retelling was too much for Inu-Yasha to bear. The idea and fears of this very incident had plagued him, but the reality of it was the final straw.
"Kagome, we have to talk."
She looked up, surprised. Her chocolate brown eyes were a mix of fear and concern. "But your wounds.."
"Feh. They don't concern me right now. There are more important issues at hand." He got up slowly so the pain would not be too great and overtake him.
"Inu-Yasha, Kagome is right! You are in no condition to be sitting up, much less be moving around and walking outside--"
"Spare me, all right, Sango? I don't need any lectures from you. I'll be getting them from Kagome the whole way down," he snarled in her direction. She scowled, but knew better than to argue with Inu-Yasha. He could be more stubborn than an ass and just as rude.
Kagome followed Inu-Yasha reluctantly out of the hut, eyeing his waist to be sure his faithful sword was there. Finding it was, she followed him a bit more at ease. But not much. Something was wrong.
"I feared this would happen," he began as the two ambled slowly through the forest. To the rest of the world in the feudal era, life was normal. Birds sang, villages around them continued on their daily routines, completely unaware of the peril that the four had grown quite used to. It was like their battle only affected their lives, and the others directly involved.
"Feared what would happen?" She tilted her head upwards, looking at his downcast face. The cool shade of the trees washed over him, casting a shadow on his fine, silvery hair. The cute little ears on the top of his head swiveled around to catch each noise their peaceful surroundings had to offer.
"That I would attack you, Kagome. I cannot allow this to happen, no matter what. Since you stumbled into my life, you've given me back so many things I'd once lost: trust, friendship, and the ability to care for others. I owe you so much, because with all of that you've given me back life. And what do I do? I turn around and nearly rip you apart. The smell of their blood is terrible, but yours would be.." His words trailed off and Kagome's breath stopped for a moment. His words were kind and almost scary the way the mere implications of his concern and affection made all of the past seem like a silly little dream. But she also knew what was coming. He was going to make her go...
Inu-Yasha pulled her into another hug, much like the one before. The one where she'd been pushed into the well, free of the jewel shards. Her heart silently broke. If the words had not signaled his farewell, the hug that once caused her to be pushed forcefully back into a home she was not sure she wanted did. It was the same, it was his way of letting her know without gathering the words to go along, and they both knew it.
"Goodbye, Kagome," he said. He lifted her up in his arms, without any sign of protest. He was confused, and looked down. Tears ran down her face and he dropped her in. More gently this time.
"Goodbye, Inu-Yasha."
The words, cracked and broken, slowly drifted up the well and into Inu- Yasha's retreating ears. If his heart had not shattered at her tears, her goodbye was enough to do it.
At the very least she'd be safe and sound at home. Inu-Yasha sighed inwardly, heavy and sad, as he made the long walk back to Kaede's hut.
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Author's Note: Heh! I'm done! Yeah, I know my chapter was long. But that's just how I write... Please review! Hope you enjoyed!
Another note? I am trying very, VERY hard to fix the format. I have no idea what happened. I didn't read the note on the tags for one thing. Another, since I'm worried about the tags a -- is the beginning or end of a thought or a memory (example: --this is a thought--). I don't know how it's double spaced or why chapter two is cut off, but everything will be fixed shortly. Thanks to everyone who's already reviewed! ~exsanguination
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------
Inu-Yasha rolled over and moaned melodramatically.
"Inu-Yasha, stop! If you keep moving around, you'll hurt yourself more and I won't be able to dress your wounds." Kagome sat up with irritation, crossing her arms over her chest.
"I never asked you to," he shot back. Kagome gave him a nasty look before he swallowed his pride and went back to laying on his stomach. He did, however, mumble under his breath. Kagome let it slide, understanding his aggressive personality through her own. Instead, she focused her energy on wondering, yet again, what to do about her friend's transformations from half-demon to full-blooded demon.
He was getting worse every time. He didn't recognize his fellow friends anymore. He'd nearly killed her. She'd been attacked and nearly killed many a-time in this era. It didn't phase her nearly as much as it did before. But this was Inu-Yasha. It was different having to flee from him, watch as his claws went after her. Had Sessomaru not shown up when he had..
"Why do you insist on leaving him injured and vulnerable? You want to kill him so badly, why not do it? If not for you, another demon could easily come along and take the opportunity. Would you mind explaining your strange behavior? Or could it be your affections for living creatures have grown? Don't expect we haven't noticed the child who follows you without question.." Miroku had been defiant this time again. His dark eyes disappeared under the slits of his eyelids. So much that Sessomaru almost missed Miroku's disdainful and untrusting stare.
"My answer, monk, has not changed. I wish to slay my brother, but not until he knows himself once more. If he must kill the girl, I want those same circumstances to apply." Inu-Yasha's brother was every bit as cold and hateful towards Miroku as Miroku was to him.
"What about the girl called Rin?"
"I have no affections for the girl. She is merely a servant to me."
"I thought you had no wish for human help. Was it not you who told Inu- Yasha that under no circumstances, even as one lay dying, should a demon accept human aide?"
"I gave you my answer. I have more important matters to attend to. Come, Jaken." With his icy, calm remark, he turned on his heel and walked away. Jaken ambled behind him.
Kagome sighed, trying to understand. Why had Sessomaru, again and again, insisted on testing the depths of Inu-Yasha's murderous demonic rages? He was only pushing Inu-Yasha to do the exact opposite of what he was implying what he wanted to happen. Making him lose his human aspects only made it that much easier to lose himself again.
"OUCH! Dammit, Kagome, do those remedies have to hurt that MUCH?"
"Sorry," she muttered. She continued to apply antiseptic to his back, before wrapping it in bandages.
"I like it, myself," Miroku said. "They work just as well as anything we have. But we need not waste the time preparing them. They're already ready, put into little cans and tubes. Besides, with Sango applying them- He was cut short with a quick blow to the head from Sango.
"Spare me."
Miroku grinned and threw Kagome a wink. Kagome laughed, to the confusion of both Sango and Inu-Yasha. She wondered when Miroku would finally win Sango over. When he would finally learn that lechery would not get him what he desired.
"Inu-Yasha?"
"What?"
"Don't you remember anything?" She cocked her head to the side, letting her midnight hair fall in her face.
"No. I don't. What's the big deal about it?" He sulked, wishing they'd just shut up already. They never actually came out and said what needed to be said. He'd had it up to here with every one of them. It was getting damn annoying. "If you want to say something, just say it, all right?" He was nearly at growling level. Sango jumped and Kagome glared.
Miroku took a deep breath and started in. "Inu-Yasha, when you transform and become a full demon, you are even more aggressive, powerful, and formidable than you are at current, correct?"
"Yeah, so what?"
"However, unlike most demons, you do not distinguish allies from foes and go after whoever happens to be standing in your way. In this case, Inu- Yasha, the one standing in your way was Kagome."
Inu-Yasha's heart skipped a beat. Kagome?
"Wh-what happened?"
"Sessomaru stepped in and stopped you."
"What!?"
"Don't act as if you did not hear me, Inu-Yasha."
Kagome continued the story. "He said that if you were to be killed by him or.." she swallowed hard. "Or if you were to kill me, he said he wanted you to know yourself. Not to be what you were. And not know who you were." Kagome's voice was cracking, and they all noticed. Inu-Yasha twisted his aching back in time to see Kagome blink back tears. It hurt him to see.
Again, the doubts of being a full-fledged demon started in on his mind. He'd always wanted to be a full demon, save for the time spent being with Kikyou. But that power wasn't supposed to be as malevolent, hateful, or murderous. His powers weren't supposed to be used for purely slaughter, with not distinction between evil and good. And now, now he'd almost lost Kagome because of this horrible transformation.
Kagome sat back, done with fixing him up with her strange medicines and wrapping his wounds. She pulled her knees to her chest, hugging herself tight.
"Inu-Yasha, STOP!" she'd yelled, watching his claws rip through the leader of the band of thieves. A small girl, much like Rin, cowered in fear off to the corner of the tiny room. Innocent and helpless, but also in the wrong place at the wrong time. She didn't deserve death, nor did she deserve this sight as a memory. Much like, but not the same, as Kohaku's memories.
He had turned to her then, suddenly and frightfully, his dark eyes full of a menace and hate. A menace and hate he didn't even hold for Naraku, the evil bastard who'd torn all their lives to Hell.
He came at her, holding up his blood-stained claws, poised to strike her. She called out in fear, but did not budge. Her head was held high, with tears so full of torment that the sight broke Miroku and Sango's hearts.
"Inu-Yasha, please.."
"Inu-Yasha!"
The names were called at the same moment, but the louder and more spiteful of the two won Inu-Yasha's attention. Clad in billowy, decorated white robes and spiked armor stood the very brother who despised Inu-Yasha with every fiber of his being. No greater pleasure would be found than in his death. Kagome felt an even deeper fear than her own death. That being Inu- Yasha's.
"Sessomaru, please, don't! Don't hurt him!"
"Your insolence is most irritating. Shut your mouth, filthy wench, or would you prefer death at his hands?"
"I don't care what happens to me as long as you leave him alone!"
Sessomaru merely gazed at her with his icy stare. She did baffle him, however. Did this young human girl truly prefer to die instead of seeing his brother, a worthless mix of the two races, die instead? However, she need not worry. For the time being. It was not his time to die. He chuckled on the inside, leaving an eerily placid look on the outside.
"I do not intend to take his life yet, stupid woman."
The retelling was too much for Inu-Yasha to bear. The idea and fears of this very incident had plagued him, but the reality of it was the final straw.
"Kagome, we have to talk."
She looked up, surprised. Her chocolate brown eyes were a mix of fear and concern. "But your wounds.."
"Feh. They don't concern me right now. There are more important issues at hand." He got up slowly so the pain would not be too great and overtake him.
"Inu-Yasha, Kagome is right! You are in no condition to be sitting up, much less be moving around and walking outside--"
"Spare me, all right, Sango? I don't need any lectures from you. I'll be getting them from Kagome the whole way down," he snarled in her direction. She scowled, but knew better than to argue with Inu-Yasha. He could be more stubborn than an ass and just as rude.
Kagome followed Inu-Yasha reluctantly out of the hut, eyeing his waist to be sure his faithful sword was there. Finding it was, she followed him a bit more at ease. But not much. Something was wrong.
"I feared this would happen," he began as the two ambled slowly through the forest. To the rest of the world in the feudal era, life was normal. Birds sang, villages around them continued on their daily routines, completely unaware of the peril that the four had grown quite used to. It was like their battle only affected their lives, and the others directly involved.
"Feared what would happen?" She tilted her head upwards, looking at his downcast face. The cool shade of the trees washed over him, casting a shadow on his fine, silvery hair. The cute little ears on the top of his head swiveled around to catch each noise their peaceful surroundings had to offer.
"That I would attack you, Kagome. I cannot allow this to happen, no matter what. Since you stumbled into my life, you've given me back so many things I'd once lost: trust, friendship, and the ability to care for others. I owe you so much, because with all of that you've given me back life. And what do I do? I turn around and nearly rip you apart. The smell of their blood is terrible, but yours would be.." His words trailed off and Kagome's breath stopped for a moment. His words were kind and almost scary the way the mere implications of his concern and affection made all of the past seem like a silly little dream. But she also knew what was coming. He was going to make her go...
Inu-Yasha pulled her into another hug, much like the one before. The one where she'd been pushed into the well, free of the jewel shards. Her heart silently broke. If the words had not signaled his farewell, the hug that once caused her to be pushed forcefully back into a home she was not sure she wanted did. It was the same, it was his way of letting her know without gathering the words to go along, and they both knew it.
"Goodbye, Kagome," he said. He lifted her up in his arms, without any sign of protest. He was confused, and looked down. Tears ran down her face and he dropped her in. More gently this time.
"Goodbye, Inu-Yasha."
The words, cracked and broken, slowly drifted up the well and into Inu- Yasha's retreating ears. If his heart had not shattered at her tears, her goodbye was enough to do it.
At the very least she'd be safe and sound at home. Inu-Yasha sighed inwardly, heavy and sad, as he made the long walk back to Kaede's hut.
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Author's Note: Heh! I'm done! Yeah, I know my chapter was long. But that's just how I write... Please review! Hope you enjoyed!