Sorey and Mikleo had always been Sorey and Mikleo. Inseparable since infancy, when each would cry as soon as one was lifted out of their crib before the other. They had never needed to wonder about their relationship since they were the closest two people could be. They were brothers. They were best friends. But they were also more than that, a thing left undefined because there wasn't a need to do so. They had always been together, and neither wanted—could—imagine a time when they weren't. Living in a confined domain, populated with only a few dozen seraphim, they didn't know much about relationships. To them relationships were constant, stable things that simply evolved with time.
Sleep was not a necessity for seraphim, but it was something they could do and find pleasure in. It wasn't until they were four and five respectively that Mikleo realized he was the only seraph to sleep on a regular basis. The habit had developed naturally just as everything about their dynamic. Mikleo shoved the revelation off because being close to Sorey was more important than the realization that he was different.
Gramps had almost constructed a second bed for the water seraph, but it had become quite apparent one wasn't needed from the way the two boys would snuggle together as if it were their most natural state. Small body pressed to small body, all smiles and youthful giggles.
The village was close-knit, fully aware of how innocent their relationship was, so it continued without question. If someone had told them at ten and elevent that they had passed the age when it was common for boys to cuddle, they wouldn't have understood. Relationships grew fonder, not further apart. And that was exactly how it was for them.
Sorey had been told he was human early on, but it wasn't until he was ten that it finally set in. He didn't feel any different from the others, yet by this point in time he could no longer overlook the small signs everywhere. While Mikleo joined him in bed each night, he was the only one whose head would slump to the study desk when he pushed himself to stay up reading about ruins for too long. He was the only one whose stomach would growl with hunger. And he was the only one who couldn't wield seraph artes.
They told him he would only live to be a hundred at the most, and this was something he could not comprehend. Not when everyone—save for Mikleo—was already twice that age at least. Not when Mikleo would surely live well passed that age.
He finally confronted Mikleo about it, hiding his sadness with annoyance. "What does it matter? I'm only a human," he said after Mikleo lectured him about cleaning up their room.
"What does that have to do with anything?" the other boy asked him, confusion clear on his face.
Sorey wavered somewhat. "It's not like we will be together forever or anything."
He saw Mikleo's face sour at this statement. "E-even so, you should still clean up after yourself."
"Maybe so. Or maybe humans are just too selfish to."
"Sorey, what are you talking about?"
"We aren't the same, Mikleo. We may try to be, but we aren't. I'm just some human."
Mikleo stared him down with sincerity. "You aren't just some human. You are Sorey."
"I don't want to be special. I want to be a seraph like you."
Mikleo bit his lip at this. "I do too. But you can't. It doesn't work that way."
"But what if it did? What if I could become a seraph?"
"That's nonsense."
"Nuh uh. Don't you remember that story Gramps used to tell us, the one about that human who was changed as a gift from the very first seraph?"
"That's just a kid's story."
"No. I believe it really happened. And I'm going to do it too. It has to be possible. Because if not then I'm…" He broke off, tears betraying him.
"Dummy. What are you crying for?" But Mikleo looked ready to cry as well.
Sorey was all out sobbing now. "Because I'm gonna die, and then you'll be all alone."
Mikleo pulled him to his chest, wrapping a protective arm around his back even though he was also trembling. "That won't happen."
"But Gramps said-"
"I don't care what Gramps said. You're gonna live a long life, and we're gonna spend that entire time together."
It wasn't a question, or even a request, but Sorey nodded anyway. "Yeah." His tears were beginning to subside, and he let his head press against Mikleo's chest, feeling the steady heartbeat there. Mikleo rubbed comforting circles on his back, and he began to do the same, feeling that between them Mikleo had the worst of it. "Mikleo," he finally said, voice soft and subdued, "I'm sorry."
"What for?"
"For not being able to stay with you forever. I'm sorry I was born a human."
Mikleo tightened his hold of him, body trembling again. "Don't say that. I like you just the way you are."
"Yeah, but, won't you be sad? I get sad just thinking about it."
He laughed, but Sorey could tell it was hallow. "You don't need to worry about me. I'll manage without you just fine. So, don't think like that anymore, okay?"
Sorey nodded, and tried not to.
However, Mikleo couldn't stop thinking about the day Sorey would leave him. When it wasn't his death it was his conscious departure. Gramps always said that Sorey would leave Elysia one day, that he would be drawn outside by the allure of other humans. Mikleo found that difficult to fathom considering how well Sorey fit in with the rest of them, how happy Sorey seemed to be with the rest of them, and the promises that Sorey made to only him. He told himself that he would go with him whenever that day came, if it ever did at all, because not only did he long to explore all the ruins of the world just as Sorey did, but imagining a world without Sorey scared him more than he would have liked to admit even to himself.
He prepared himself as best he could. He researched human towns, ruins locations, edible plants, survival guides, and anything else that seemed remotely useful that he could find among Gramps' books. Not once did he read anything that would prepare him for her.
Neither of them had seen another human before. It was supposed to just be a regular day like any other exploring the Mt. Mabinogio ruins. It wasn't supposed to be the day when Mikleo first felt the pains of possessiveness. When Sorey moved to wake the sleeping girl he suggested they stop to think about it. Humans weren't supposed to enter Elysia or know about the seraphim. But Mikleo also didn't want her to know about Sorey, or more accurately, he didn't want Sorey to know her. If he did, he might end up leaving.
Sorey didn't listen, and the girl awoke. Mikleo moved in front of her, and just as he'd been told, she didn't register his presence in the slightest. She was human. Just like Sorey. A sour feeling prickled in his chest, but he ignored it. Sorey deserved this rare opportunity. It was because of this that he stood up for Sorey's decision to bring her back to the village to Gramps.
But the feeling set back in when he realized that she would be staying. Sorey's caring nature forfeited their bed, opting for a pile of cushions instead. Mikleo knew he could have still slept with him there—it wasn't like Alisha would have known anyway—but he couldn't bring himself to. So, they spent their first night separated, and it is awful. Mikleo was used to sleep, so used to it that he could feel tiredness weighing down his eyes, so he laid down. He tried in vain to fall asleep, but there was too much space, the air too cool around him. He realized that this would be how it would feel without Sorey, which made him feel absolutely miserable.
The girl left days later, but Sorey couldn't stand by after realizing that a hellion was after her. Sorey really was too pure for the world. Of course, Mikleo left with him without question.
He thought he had prepared for it, but human society was a lot to take in. There were so many people and so much activity. Compared to the laid-back seraphim, human society looked exhausting. People moving around from one place to another constantly, chatting continually, and working, always productive. There seemed to always be something to be done. Yet, there was an odd beauty to it. It was through this drive that such artistic architecture was possible. The difference between him and Sorey was highlighted by the sparkle in the latter's eyes as he took everything in. While Mikleo was sure he would become worn out just from being in the middle of such hustle and bustle for long, Sorey could surely shine in it.
They found Alisha during a trial to discover who would become the new Shepherd. It wasn't surprising that Sorey's eyes glistened at the prospect of becoming the Shepherd—he had fantasized over the idea for years after all—but Mikleo had never expected for this dream to ever become a reality. Everything had happened so fast. One moment Alisha was praying to the Lady of the Lake, and the next hellions were attacking. It wasn't a burden to be taken on lightly, yet Sorey appeared to be the only hope, and he didn't hesitate. He claimed that it was a burden he was willing to take on so that seraphim and humans could live together in peace and harmony.
It was reckless, but Mikleo admired him for it. If he was willing to give of himself for it, that showed just how important that dream was to him. And he hoped that included him as well. But then he collapsed and The Lady of the Lake, Lailah, said he would have a fever for three entire days, and worry gripped him. Nothing was worth the possibility of losing him sooner than he already would.
Those three days were agonizing. It had only been a few days since they left Elysia, yet Mikleo had already failed to protect Sorey. His worries were lessened, however, by the fact that Alisha was there to take care of Sorey's arrangements (since neither he nor Lailah could do so) and that Lailah was there to help monitor his condition. She reassured that sleep was all the body needed to adjust. Finally, Sorey woke, and Mikleo could truly breathe again.
Sorey was carefree about the incident, though Mikleo assumed it would have been silly for him to worry over a problem that was never there to begin with. Still, he resented the fact that his care was so easily overlooked. Not long after, they set out, Sorey donned in regal white, and Lailah in tow. She was a welcomed addition to the party and never once made Mikleo's chest tighten as Alisha had. It made him realize that it had nothing to do with gender or new relations. Mikleo was jealous of what a human could give Sorey.
He may not have been jealous of Lailah, but the longer they traveled, the longer he stood back completely helpless against the hellions, the further he felt from Sorey. So, when he voiced his longing to become a Sub Lord it was entirely about supporting Sorey. He would not stand by only as a liability to him. He had vowed all those years ago that he would protect and support him no matter what. Of course, Sorey's dream was his own as well. He couldn't believe the way Sorey doubted his resolution. Couldn't believe his gull to tell him to wait and think about it when he himself had jumped head first into the Shepherd's role. Of course he would want to fight for a life where humans and seraphim could live together in peace, where he and Sorey could live in peace.
Alisha had become the Shepherd's Squire, and one night when they were nowhere near an inn and had decided to sleep outside, she questions them. Sorey had scooted over so that Mikleo could settle under the blanket beside him. She shifted uncomfortably watching them. Finally, after clearing her throat, she asked, "Do you usually sleep like that?"
"Yeah," Sorey answered nonchalantly.
"I see." She paused, still looking uncertain. "Why is that?"
Mikleo gave her a look. Were they that unusual? "We're brothers."
"Isn't this what brothers do?" Sorey asked.
Alisha hesitated. "I am an only child, so I can't say for sure. However, no, I don't think that they do." She wrung her hands, not making eye contact. "But it isn't important anyway. What matters is that your two do." She smiled at them, but Mikleo could tell it was forced.
Eventually, Alisha's Squire pact was too much of a strain for Sorey, and they parted ways. Further along their travels they gained Edna, Dezel, and Rose to the party. Again, Mikleo's chest tightened having another human so close to Sorey. But just like Alisha she was nice and he couldn't help liking her. If only he hadn't had to watch her and Sorey pretend to be married to pass the border into Lastonbell. He knew what marriage was, but it had always seemed like a distance concept. Now he realized that Sorey would most likely get married one day. And when that happened he might not be in his life.
The longer their journey weighted on, the more it became apparent to him that he could lose Sorey at any moment. As much as it hurt, he prepared himself for it. But yet again, he wasn't ready when the time came. He hadn't anticipated losing him to his duty. This was a parting he had never imagined, and one more bittersweet than he could describe.
Under the endless starry sky, Sorey began, "I forget who said it. That there are as many emotions as there are stars in the sky. I can totally see that."
"A metaphor for how each emotion sparkles in its own way, huh? Must've been a romantic who came up with that one," Mikleo replied.
"There's something I learned from this journey. Some stars you can't see. And because you can't see them, you think they're not shining. But they are."
Mikleo could feel his heart beat at this, but he ignored it. "It turned out there were a lot of stars that we couldn't see from our home in Elysia."
"Once people notice the stars, they start to understand just how brilliantly they shine. Just like how Alisha finally got a sense of what seraphim were truly like the first time she heard your voices. I was really excited back then. It gave me hope that one day other humans might be able to talk to the seraphim."
"But even then, you had to cut off your sense and hold your…" Mikleo's gentle expression fell into a hard line. "Oh, I see. You were actually contemplating wat you'll do after the last battle."
"Yeah," he answered, not looking at him. "If I let myself become a vessel, for Maotelus, and shut off all my sense, we might be able to spread that power throughout the entire continent of Glenwood. If it works—and that's a big if—the squire ought to be able to wield power like mine, even if she doesn't possess natural ability on par with a Shepherd."
"So long as you entrusted all of your senses to the Squire, it's not out of the question. And we might be able to grow the ranks of Squires who could help us. Just think of Alisha. It's arguably a more constructive approach than just waiting for another Shepherd to appear."
"Exactly."
"But…" he wavered. It was the best plan they had. But Sorey would have to give up so much. Who knew what this might do to him. He may lose his memory, he may die, and even if none of those things happened, he would lose any chance he had of making a life with Alisha or Rose. "You understand the implications, don't you?"
Sorey walked around to the other side of him, touching his shoulder affectionately in the process. "Yeah. Until the Squires can quell enough of the earth's malevolence to let Maotelus' natural purification take over…I would need to wait, and sleep."
"By bonding with Maotelus, you'll be abandoned in time. It could take years…It could take centuries. And even if humans appear who can see and talk to seraphim…There's no guarantee they'll choose the path of coexistence."
"I believe in them." He said it so effortlessly that Mikleo found it difficult not to believe in him just as effortlessly.
"What about your dream? Weren't you going to go off exploring ruins around the world?" Weren't they going to go together? It was stupid. He knew full well that coexistence between seraphim and humans had always been Sorey's true dream from the beginning.
"My dream will live on, so long as I don't forget."
Mikleo turned toward him. His mind was clear. The day of parting had finally come, and he would accept it. No matter how much it tugged at his chest. "Very well."
"Thank you, Mikleo."
Sorey looked genuinely grateful or the support, and they touch their wrists together as has been their friendship trademark since childhood. Mikleo is flooded with images of that childhood, of memories that will probably never again be repeated. He almost felt like crying, but he didn't. He was stronger than that.
It wasn't until Sorey was gone—asleep—that Mikleo finally realized what had been feeling all this time. Before leaving Elysia things had been so much easier. He had never had to wonder about his relationship with him. Now he had seen love and death and relationships of many kinds. He knew that love could be a flitting thing or an endless thing. Now, sitting under an endless starry sky, thinking back on the man he had no idea if would ever see again, he knew that his was the latter. It didn't even matter if Sorey's were the same. It was enough to finally understand why it was he had wanted to be together with him always. Why he had struggled to protect him and stand on equal ground with him. He didn't just want to be a part of Sorey's life forever, he wanted to share all of that life. But here he was, missing out on it.
While Sorey slept he thought about Mikleo. He wasn't sure when he had realized his feelings were beyond friendship or brotherhood. Somewhere along the line, after forging so many new relations and comparing each one, he had realized that Mikleo's could never compare. It wasn't just that he knew Mikleo better than anyone, but there was a uniqueness to Mikleo alone that he craved with all his being. They fit together like puzzle pieces, only forming a complete picture when together. He wondered through his sleep how he was taking the separation. They had both been crybabies as kids, and he wondered whether Mikleo would cry for him. He imagined being there to soak the tears up with his sleeve, to hold his shaking body to him so that he could assure him that he would never leave him again. And that's what Sorey vowed to himself. As soon as he awoke he would find Mikleo and stick by him for whatever time they had left together.
There was still a bond connecting them, whether it is from their Sub Lord pact or their close tie he couldn't be sure, but he was able to follow it to a crumbling ruin set in a beautiful aquamarine blue that reminded him exactly of Mikleo. The bond led him inside where he watched a distant figure fall with the caving floor. He knew immediately it was Mikleo and dashed to the ledge. His hand found his, and he watched silently as realization hits his friend. His eyes shifted in a way that showed he couldn't believe this was real, and Sorey wondered how many times he daydreamed about his return. Finally, his eyes rounded into assurance, and he brought his other hand up to grasp Sorey's.
Sorey tugged him up, using more pressure than necessary so that the water seraph landed in a heap atop him. They locked eyes, content for a time merely to drink each other's presence in.
"Sorey," the seraph said, reaching out a hand to brush against Sorey's check.
He resisted the urge to close his eyes and give into that touch. Mikleo was far too beautiful a sight to give up. He stroked long silvery blue hair. "You're beautiful," he said.
Mikleo blushed, averting his gaze. "You are too."
Sorey knew he was different but he hadn't taken a look at himself in his haste to find Mikleo again.
"How…How are you still alive? It's been hundreds of years." Mikleo looked pitiful, as if he had given up on Sorey ever returning.
Sorey took his hand in his own, intertwining their fingers. "I said I would become a seraph, didn't I?"
Tears glistened in Mikleo's eyes, but he batted them away. He breathed his name on stagnant breath. "What about your chance at a human life?"
"Silly. I never wanted that. It was always you from the beginning. It was you and ruins."
Mikleo cracked a smile. "Nerd."
"Double nerd." They hit each other playfully, just like old times.
"Sorey," he said with seriousness, "I need to tell you something."
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
Sorey smiled. "I love you, too."
Mikleo frowned. "I mean romantically."
"So do I." His blush was back ten-fold, and Sorey poked him in the cheek. "Mikle-adorable~"
"Not you too. And to think I just got away from Edna's constant jibes a month ago."
"It's a warm up. For seeing them all again."
"That's true. We'll have to go visit them and introduce you to the new Shepherd and Squire."
"Sounds like a plan."
"What will we do then?"
"What else? Go explore ruins," he answered animatedly.
"Is that all?" Mikleo asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"What do you mean is that all? It will be the time of our lives!"
"Yeah. You're right. It's just, I always thought there were more to romantic relationships than this."
Sorey took his hand again, and this time Mikleo squeezed back. "We aren't a romantic relationship. We're just us."
Mikleo smiled softly. "Yes. We are."
