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Amuto, Tadase bashing, obsessively-protective-of-Amu Kukai, and much more!

For those of you who don't know, "baka" is Japanese for "idiot", "fool", or "stupid".

DISCLAIMER:

Throughout the course of this fanfic you may feel Amukai (Kukamu?) vibes. I promise that your worry is completely unjustified and you should feel ashamed for even suggesting that I am a fan of it.

Amu, Kukai, Tadase, and Yaya were walking around the park just having a good time, when a certain cat-like teen jumped down behind them. Well, one of them in particular.

He covered the girl's eyes, causing her to stop in her tracks. "Hey Amu," he whispered seductively into her ear.

She jumped, and tore his hands from her face. "Sh-shut up, Ikuto." She stammered out as he kissed her hair.

"YOU LEAVE MY LITTLE AMU-CHAN ALONE YOU PERVERT!" Kukai shouted as Tadase and Yaya did their best to hold him back.

"Oh that bothers you, does it?" Ikuto smirked and shifted his hands so they were in position to reach up Amu's shirt.

Kukai's eyes were full of fire, and he looked as if he was on the verge of tears. "YOU GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER YOU BASTARD! I WILL CALL THE POLICE FOR MOLESTATION OF A MINOR!"

Ikuto kissed Amu's neck, and she blushed furiously as he nuzzled her while unbuttoning the top couple buttons of her lolita-esq blouse. She just stood frozen, too shocked to try to resist.

Kukai cracked. He tore out of Tadase and Yaya's grasp, and pulled Amu into a (overly protective) hug. "YOU WILL NOT TAKE AMU-CHAN'S INNOCENCE, IT'S THE LAST SHE HAS LEFT WITH YOU POISONING HER LITTLE MIND!"

"Aww, but Amu liked it, didn't she?" Ikuto asked her, to which she blushed even harder and hid her face in Kukai's neck.

Kukai smiled. "HA, SEE? SHE LIKES ME BETTER! Come on Amu-chan, you don't have to be harassed by the bad man anymore..." He cooed to her.

"Ku-Kukai-" Amu began, but he threw her over his shoulder like an Amu-sized sack of potatoes and began walking away with the other two before she could finish her protest.

Ikuto swiftly side-stepped in front of him. "And I will call the police for kidnapping of a minor."

"I-I, hey, I'm not kidnapping her!" He stammered, Amu still over his shoulder.

Meanwhile, the girl in question was punching at Kukai's back, trying to get him to let her down. "BAKABAKABAKABAKA!"

"She appears to agree with me." Ikuto commented, noticing her futile attempts to get back on her feet.

"ANATA GA BAKADA!" (a/n: You're an idiot/fool) Amu yelled at Kukai.

Ikuto pouted. "I think she's forgotten I'm here..." He said as he effortlessly lifted Amu off of Kukai's shoulder, and held her bridal-style while Kukai gaped.

Amu just looked annoyed by the whole situation. "I don't even know what's going on anymore." She mumbled, cuddling into Ikuto and trying to catch up on the sleep she missed when Kukai called her at five in the morning when he couldn't decide what to have for breakfast.

Ikuto smirked. "See, now you don't want to disturb your 'little Amu-chan', would you?" He said, stroking her cheek with his thumb, half because he wanted to annoy soccer boy, and half because she looked so cute asleep.

"ARE YOU GOING TO MOLEST HER?" Kukai yelled, causing Amu to stir in her sleep.

Ikuto started walking away with the sleeping Amu still in his arms, seemingly ignoring Kukai's continuing threats and accusations.

Soooo...

Review, I guess? I'll probably update even if you don't, but they're always appreciated.