Azumanga Daioh: Superconnected- Kaorin's Revenge!

(See author's notes at the end!)

It was a year after graduation. Kaorin was bored, so she decided to play with Kimura-sensei. The fool was probably still such a lech, so she called Yomi to go with her to Azumanga High School because she didn't want to be alone with him. Kaorin wasn't scared, she just didn't want to be alone with him.

"Yomi, just go with what I say," Kaorin said. "and get kind of dirty."

Yomi sighed. "Oh, okay."

Yomi didn't understand why Kaorin wanted to visit Kimura-sensei after all this time, but she went along with it.

As they walked into the building, Kaorin recalled what Chihiro had told her during that final year of high school…

"You do know that Kimura-sensei was near you with a trouser tent, right?", Chihiro had said.

Kaorin laughed that day. "I don't believe you."

"I am serious.", replied Chihiro. "I swear that you made him pop a tent."

"EEEEEWWWWW!"

And even just recently…

"Kimura-sensei keeps asking my kid sister about you. Unfortunately, she's in his homeroom class this year.", Chihiro had told her while shopping at the record store.

But Kaorin didn't need to hear any of it from her friend, though it did confirm what Kaorin herself noticed during that time in high school; Kimura-sensei became advisor of the Astronomy Club after he found out she was a member. This made Summer Astronomy Camp pure hell, not to mention she would have preferred to be with her idol Sakaki-san at Chiyo-chan's summer home.

Then on the senior class trip to Okinawa, he actually bought the same shirt she got at a tourist shop earlier that day. Let's just say Kaorin never wore that shirt again. It was most likely in a box of junk somewhere.

All through that final year, Kimura-sensei was her homeroom teacher. Kaorin suspected he had a say in that. She noticed how he was- protective of her; sometimes too protective. Like when a boy in the class made a sexually charged joke, Kaorin wanted to laugh, but before she could, Kimura-sensei yelled at the boy. "Stop that!", he shouted. "That's sexual harassment!"

Then he glanced at Kaorin. All she could think was "Dude, the joke was funny. Get over it."

A few months earlier that year, things got weirder than usual. Kimura-sensei would point out things; he noticed how Kaorin would hold her pen to write or scratches from her cats that were fading. She just felt like he was watching her. He had called her by her nickname several times and just wanted to scream. She felt like he was watching her and one day, two classmates saw it too. They said that he would keep looking at her. It was creepy. So were the times he would ask her questions that had nothing to do with the lesson. Kimura-sensei wasn't asking anything perverted, but it still creeped out Kaorin.

The worst of it was when Kaorin wore her skirt kind of short one day. It made her feel as cool as Sakaki san, until… it just happened to be the same day as a test in Kimura-sensei's class. Kaorin felt like the lecherous teacher kept hanging around her, making it hard to concentrate. "Did anyone else see it?", Kaorin thought as she went home that afternoon. It didn't help that he gave her a 100 on the test.

"What was so special about me?", Kaorin thought.

She knew what he was doing but did he know what he was doing? A few girls would have loved the attention; yeah, if they were desperate losers. But Kaorin was lucky; Kimura-sensei never touched her. That would have been bad. Very bad. Very destructive. If she went to her parents or the school board with this information, Kimura-sensei would have probably lost his career and everything else with it. Kaorin thought of his wife and daughter and decided to keep it to herself. She also asked her friends to do the same.

So now it was time. Kaorin took a cherry blow-pop out of her bag and unwrapped it. It was one of those super blow-pops that just barely fit in a human mouth!

"This is crazy", Yomi said.

"Yeah…, Kaorin responded. "but the perv's got it coming to him!"

Yomi sighed. "Run this by me again."

Kaorin explained her plan. "Just tell me if you notice Kimura-sensei getting nervous or hot and bothered."

The thought of what Yomi was made to look for made her nauseous. "You so owe me, Kaorin!"

The girls walked in the classroom. Kimura-sensei was at his desk and his eyes lit up when he saw Kaorin. All that went through Yomi's mind was "Yikes."

"Ding-dong! Ding-dong! Kaorin's here!", he yelled with such excitement. "What's up, , my prized pupil?"

"Stop calling me Kaorin, you dick! Only my friends can call me that!", she wanted to say, but instead she just held up the candy and said "This blow-pop."

Kaorin started licking the blow-pop innocently. "And soon you will be too…", she said in her mind.

"Hey, Yomi", Kaorin said aloud. "I had a lot of fun with that guy last night!"

She then turned to Kimura-sensei. "Let me tell you something, teacher, you should have seen it. You could have gotten kissing pointers from my date."

Kaorin continued licking the blow-pop. Now all Yomi could think of was "Holy shit, what is she doing? She's going to turn this geek into a sex maniac! Now I know why she didn't want to do this alone. Well' I guess it's my cue…"

"So how far did you go with him?", asked Yomi.

Kaorin took the candy out of her mouth. "What's third base?"

Yomi answered uncomfortably, "It's oral sex."

"Then what's second?"

"Feelin' stuff up."

Kaorin licked the blow-pop. "That's the one!"

Then she turned to Kimura-sensei. "And you didn't hear that, teacher!"

She pointed at him with the wet blow-pop. "You know too much!"

Kimura-sensei just sat there with his mouth hanging open. Yomi got the information she had to. "Ick", she thought. "Now it's time to get the hell out of here!"

Come on, Kaorin. Let's go visit Yukari-sensei.", she said.

"Okay."

The two girls started towards the door. As they left, Kaorin gave the blow-pop one last slow long obnoxious lick. She could hear Kimura-sensei moan a little. "This is sick,", she thought. "But fun!"

As they walked away from the room and out of the building, Kaorin took the blow-pop out of her mouth.

"Where is the nearest trash can? I never want to see another blow-pop as long as I live.", she said, disgusted.

Yomi kind of laughed. "I guess not, you little tease!"

Then Kaorin laughed along with her, as she tossed the candy in a trash can. "I felt as cool as Sakaki-san just now!"

"I can't see her doing what you just did. Okay, you just got your former teacher all revved up with no place to go. You can never step foot in this school again, not even to visit Yukari-sensei or Kurosawa-sensei. You do know that, right?", Yomi asked her friend.

"Yeah, so?"

Yomi stopped walking. "You just caused Kimura-sensei to get an erection; this time on purpose- as revenge for being made a teacher's pet.", she exclaimed. "What are you going to do now?"

Kaorin thought for a second. "I'm going to Magical Land!"

The girls started walking again. "I bet you need a shower first.", said Yomi.

"Oh, fuck, yeah!", Kaorin shouted.

Yomi adjusted her glasses. "I need one of those gross horror movies about clowns to get the image of Kimura-sensei being aroused out of my mind. Just remember, bitch, you owe me, big time!"

The girls walked on. After a minute of silence, Kaorin spoke.

"Kimura The Unstoppable Sex Machine."

"EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!", they both yelled.

Suck on that, Kimura-sensei. Suck on that nice and slow, you pest.

Meanwhile, back in the classroom, Kimura-sensei found a note on a desk.

"To Kimura-sensei: It's okay if you jerked off to my picture. But know this-when I was 13, I had grown men wanting me, so you weren't the first one! They would really want me if I had a rack like Sakaki-san. I am saving up to get that boob job done. Care to make a donation? Yeah, keep that image for your spank bank. Okay, bye!-Kaori"

And after reading that, Kimura-sensei locked the classroom door, pulled down the window shades and got super connected; with himself!

Yeah those three worlds should have never collided.

The End

Author's Notes: This was based on a real life platonic friendship between two individuals I used to know. While I strongly believe there was absolutely no romance between the real life counterparts, it was suspected (but never proven) that the older gentleman did harbor illicit feelings for the younger lady that would have been illegal and immoral had it been acted upon. Watching the Azumanga Daioh anime and reading the manga brought back these memories and inspired me to write this story.

The three worlds I mention at the end ate that of the Azumanga Daioh world, the memories of my two long lost friends (I do hope they are happy, where ever they are), and the story's title, "Superconnected" is the title of a song by the 90's alternative rock band Belly, from their under-rated 1995 album "King".

Finally, I kept Kaorin's sexual identity out of the mix. It's up to the reader/viewer of the manga/anime to decide if she is lesbian, bi-sexual, or if her idolization of Sakaki-san was just a one time girl crush. Who really likes labels anyway?

Thanks for reading!—Melissa Watts a.k.a. LunaRaven

Originally written in 2014; revised in 2016