Warnings: Sexual Situations, Language

Disclaimer: The characters of South Park belong to their respective owners. I do this for fun, not for profit.

Chapter One

It was three weeks before the end of Stan Marsh's junior year of high school when his entire life changed.

He just didn't know it.

It was a regular day at South Park High. Stan was eating lunch with his Super Best Friend, Kyle Broflovski, and the other two people he had been friends with since preschool, Eric Cartman and Kenny McCormick.

Kyle had wanted to be a basketball player when he grew up, but when puberty failed to give him any height, he decided to go with his back-up plan. Kyle's mother had been happy when he announced that he planned on becoming a surgeon, less so when he told her he was thinking of specializing in cardiac medicine.

The two had a laugh over her antics, but Stan knew Kyle hated disappointing his mom. When Kyle told Stan he decided to go into neurology instead, Stan didn't say anything.

Kyle was also the one dating Wendy these days. The two of them had bonded over a common love of learning and found they had a lot more in common than Stan and Wendy did. Neither Kyle or Stan told Wendy about the fist fight they had when Stan first found out.

Kenny decided he was sick and tired of being poor. He worked his ass off, both in school and at his part-time job, and earned a place at a tech school within ten miles of South Park. He attended during the school day, returning in time for lunch and the last two classes of the day.

Kenny was also, in his own words, playing the field and had made his way through most of the junior and senior girls. There were even a few rumors about him dating a few boys, but those rumors were quickly squashed by the boys in question.

Then there was Cartman. He had grown from a fat little boy into a young man that was built like a brick shithouse. At 6' 1", he towered over the other three Stan was the next tallest at 5' 9" and was solid muscle. He didn't seem to care about dating anyone, but always managed to have a date for the important social milestones.

On this random Tuesday during lunch, the four were quietly eating when Cartman broke the silence with his sudden announcement.

"I'm going to join the football team."

Silence ruled over the table, sporks hovered in mid-air while the other three struggled to find something to say. Kenny broke the quiet by asking, "Dude, are you serious?" At Cartman's nod, Kenny let out a little squeak of laughter. When Cartman narrowed his eyes at the other boy, the squeak turned into a full-out belly laugh that almost caused Kenny to fall over.

Frowning at the way his lunch wiggled as he poked at it, Kyle turned his attention to Cartman. He sneered at the other boy, "Finally gonna put that weight to good use, huh, Fat-ass?"

Cartman snarled back, "The team could use someone like me, Jew-boy! The only thing you'd be used for is someone's cup!"

Kyle waved him off, refusing to let Cartman know his remark landed a hit. "Whatever, dude." He ate a bite of the Salisbury steak and a speculative gleam entered his eye. "What's the real reason you want to be on the team? It can't be the cheerleaders 'cause you've turned most of them down."

A grin split Cartman's face. He batted his eyes at Kyle and reached across the table to grab his hand. "I've been secretly trying to get your attention for years. C'mere, my love, and gimme a kiss."

Kyle scrunched his nose up in disgust and shrank back into his seat. "Ew, no." He looked over and saw Stan staring into his mashed potatoes as if they contained the secret to life. Nudging his friend, he asked, "What do you think?"

Looking up from his lunch, Stan looked Cartman over and shrugged his shoulders. "We could use a guy with Cartman's size out there. The only other decent-sized dude is Craig, but he's our best kicker." He handed his jello to Kenny then returned his gaze to his mashed potatoes. "That's what I think anyway. Coach might think differently."

As Kenny scarfed down the jello, he caught the worried gaze in both Kyle and Cartman's faces. Deciding to get everyone out of the sudden funk they were in, he wiggled his eyebrows at Cartman. "Now that Kyle's out of the picture, you should take a chance on me."

Cartman blushed at the other boy's comment, then glared at Kenny and gave him a light shove. "Knock it off, Kenny! You know that shit's not funny."

Stan looked up from his food and saw Cartman's reddened face and wondered what was so bad about the comment. He watched as Kenny raised an eyebrow at Cartman before nodding his head, concern in his eyes. Choosing to ignore the by-play between the two after all, there were things about him that Kyle only knew he finished his lunch and headed to class.

Stan stretched on the sidelines as he looked over this year's group of hopefuls as they shuffled into the field. His assessment of this group led him to feel that the only ones who stood a chance at being a decent pick were Cartman and Token. He watched as they ran through some speed drills and was impressed by Cartman's speed.

He walked over to where Kyle as the team's statistician was keeping track of everyone's times. Kyle let out a low whistle as Cartman blew past them. He jotted down the time, then looked at Stan. "Who knew the Fat-ass could be so fast? I sure as hell didn't."

Stan kept his gaze on Cartman as the coach ran them through a few plays, switching everyone around to see where they would fit. After several had been run, Stan was waved over.

"Now, I'm going to have you throw some passes to a few of these new recruits, Marsh." Coach Nesbit pointed at Token and a freshman. "You two try to catch it. Cartman and Donovan, take turns blocking tacklers."

Stan sighed, but got into formation. He called out the play and had the ball hiked to him. He watched Token tear down the field and as he readied to throw the ball, he caught sight of Butters slipping past Clyde out of the corner of his eye. He hurled the ball toward Token and braced for impact. When the hit never came, he looked over to where Butters had been coming from. Sandwiched between him and Butters was Cartman.

From on the sidelines, they heard, "Way to go, Fat-ass!"

Everyone turned and saw Kenny standing on the bench, waving the pom-poms he'd stolen from Wendy. In a high-pitched voice, he yelled, "Eric, Eric, he's our man! If he can't do it, no one can!"

Nesbit marched over to Kenny, yelling, "McCormick! Quit fucking with the cheerleaders and get back on the bleachers!"

Stan snickered into his hand at Kenny's salute and Nesbit's barely contained fury at having his practice interrupted before he turned back to Cartman. He clapped his friend on the shoulder, grinning from ear to ear. "With that play, I'm pretty sure you just made the team."