There's a monthly contest I run and this month, my friend Amanda has won it! She requested this cute little Free! fanfic that takes place after Eternal Summer when they're in university. So yeah! Please leave comments and kudos if you've enjoyed it!
To Be Free
What did it mean to be free? Haru Nanase always had the answer: to be free, it was a natural thing. He grew up with the freedom to what he willed while his parents did their own thing. The only semblance of order he would ever had in his life was through Makoto. His insistence to never swim in inappropriate places as well as to just be free but did he truly knew what it meant?
Everyone pressured him to pick a dream and go for it. It didn't take until Haru went to Australia with Rin until he truly understood what he wanted.
He just wanted to swim – it was the only thing he knew. It was the only thing he thought he cared about. He didn't realize it until he arrived back to Japan that he also needed the freedom to love.
The fight between Makoto and Haru was their first one – and it felt terrible. He didn't like being angry at his best friend but it woke up certain feelings he thought didn't exist.
He had always seen Makoto Tachibana as someone who ordered him around – a best friend with a motherly touch. Makoto would often hide his pain behind his smiles and cheerful nature. Haru never had to want or to need anything. In this instance, he was free to show Makoto any emotion he wished but Makoto never seemed to have that.
He always seemed to force himself be strong – for his siblings' sakes, for the club's sake, for Haru's sake. Never for himself, it seemed, and often Haru wondered why he never smiled for his own strength. Haru could never understand the way Makoto lived for others.
It slightly irritated Haru when he told him that Makoto wanted to be a coach instead of swimming competitively. Makoto was just as good at the backstroke as Nagisa with the breast stroke and Rei with the butterfly. Few had talent like he and Rin – Haru could see the fruits of their hard work flourish and bloom. Through their individual heats and even during the relay races… He couldn't help but get annoyed. He wished he could articulate these feelings, though, as Makoto genuinely seemed happy with his choice.
He had to respect his wish. At least, he could see him after university classes. At least, the two could freely go in and out of their homes.
Haru wished he could express his newfound feelings for the taller boy as easily as Makoto smiled. He wasn't content with how they were now. He wanted more.
Now that the two were in university, there was a greater risk of losing him. High school didn't force everyone at the same certain times – there was a possibility that Makoto could find another to smile at. Haru couldn't let him go.
Now that he found his dream and now that he's found his feelings…
Haru had to know how the other felt about him. He had to know if Makoto felt the same for him.
"Makoto…" Haru trailed off one evening. The two had met for the day after their separate training and university classes. Haru made sure that his training was around the vicinity of Makoto's university. They had been friends since they were children and there was no way he could let him go now.
Eventually, the two would separate. Eventaully, the two would go their own ways. Haru decided that he couldn't be free from his feelings. Whenever he closed his eyes, Makoto was always there. Whenever he opened his eyes, Makoto was always there. He intended to never be free of that.
To be free of Makoto would be free of love and life. There was no way he could do that.
Makoto looked at him with his usual curious green eyes. His hair was always messy and it always suited him. He always smiled. He always hid his true feelings while Haru was spoiled and was able to reveal himself quite freely.
"Makoto," he said again, mostly to bring him out of his drawn out thoughts. "I have something to tell you."
His smile deepened and possibly darkened. His light voice sounded heavy. Because of the longevity he's known the other, he grew scared himself.
Would he accept my love? Would he accept me? Haru worried. He knew the answer. He would probably force himself to. He didn't want to force him.
Worried for his silence, Makoto spoke up. "What's wrong, Haru?"
He bit his lip. Even if he rejected him, Haru just wanted to let him know.
"Makoto… this is something that's bothered me for a while." He breathed. The chatter from inside the ramen shop distracted Makoto as he could hear his stomach growl.
"Haru… can this wait until after we eat?" He asked gently.
Haru nodded as he tried to prepare himself, prepare his emotions. The meal itself was delicious as always and, because of his heightened emotions, he saw Makoto as sparkling. He saw him as someone who sparkled for others and he seemed to be genuinely happy for that. He seemed to be content with that but Haru wished he could freely smile for others.
And yet, he found he could only smile for Makoto.
The other saw his stares and chuckled. He reached down under the counter and grabbed his hand to squeeze it. This felt different. This felt a different kind of comfort. It gave him hope.
Makoto leaned over and gave him a small kiss on the lips. Time almost slowed down. He couldn't tell if the other patrons of the restaurant took notice of the lapse in time – would they care about these two young men kissing?
His lips were warm and sweet and it sparkled. Haru could taste the ramen Makoto ate. It was spicy and had a heavy tint of onion. The kiss ended just as quickly as it began.
He stared at Makoto's blushing face. Alcohol wasn't in sight so he wouldn't blame that. He just chuckled as he turned redder under the light and then Haru understood.
It was known that Haru wasn't very good at articulating himself. Makoto always pushed him along to communicate in different ways. He understood.
"Haru," Makoto said suddenly. "There's no need to worry. I love you too."
Haru smiled. To be free is to not just do what you want – but be who you want to be with.
