Please read and review :)

Lily often called James an idiot. A blind one. She really hated the fact that she loved him sometimes, but Cupid decided that they would be a good match.

Or maybe he just had bad aim.

Back to insulting James. He was just so remarkably stupid sometimes, it was worrying. It was so blindingly obvious, Lily didn't know how he could miss it. Then again, this is James we're talking about. To tell you the truth, when Lily first pointed the 'blindingly obvious' thing out to James, she almost worried for his life. Almost.

He had said that he never wanted a heart attack again, when he had finished hyperventilating.

"Of course they don't fancy each other, Lily," he had said. Then he had smiled at his girlfriend and said fondly, "You're so silly, Lily. Hey! That rhymes!" he had giggled a bit. Of course, by then, it wasn't the first time that Lily had vaguely wondered why she was going out with this buffoon.

"Alright, I'll prove it to you. I'll have them going out with each other by the end of the week. Willingly." James guffawed, and Lily had whacked him. "Well then, until I get them together there will be no physical contact between us. Oh, and James, my love, I see a frilly dress in your future."
And with that, she had stalked off, leaving a gaping and confused James behind.

-------------------------------------------------

All Lily had to do was to prove that Remus and Sirius fancied each other, and surely, that couldn't be that hard. She would just ask them. And if they didn't comply, she would ask them again. Forcefully.
And then, Lily would get them together.
And then, Lily would be able to see her lovely boyfriend in a dress. Which would both be very fun and very, very traumatising for her poor, poor boyfriend.

------------------------------------------------

Lily decided to talk to Remus just before dinner, in the library, because it was the only place she could guarantee James and Sirius not to follow due to a large amount of books. As she walked in, she waved to the librarian, who (unsurprisingly) had a soft spot for the red-headed girl.
Lily strolled forwards, taking her time, and spotted her favourite werewolf at a desk in the corner of the library. Remus was an extremely good-looking guy and Lily could completely understand why Sirius would love him. Unfortunately for her, Lily still didn't know why she loved James. She had yet to work that out.

"Hey, Lily." Remus raised his head and smiled at her gently.

Another thing, Remus had an absolutely amazing personality. Oh, and nice hair: hair to die for.

I better not let James hear me say that.

"Hey! How are you?"

"Good. You?"

Lily gave him a pensive look.

"Remus, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure."

"How do you feel about Sirius?" She asked sternly. Lily leaned forward and narrowed her emerald eyes, eagerly waiting for his answer.

Remus didn't move. It seemed like he had stopped breathing for a second.

"We're friends."

"Liar. Do you want me to tell Sirius what really happened to his Spiderman cape and gloves?" Lily quirked an eyebrow. She knew she had won. Nobody wanted to be on the receiving end of Sirius' temper. Especially when it was to do with his beloved Spiderman cape and gloves.

"Well, I might fancy him... Maybe. Possibly. A tiny bit."

Lily beamed. Awwww.... they'd be so cute together...

When she glanced at the werewolf, however, the wide smile slipped off her face. His face was glum; eyes downcast and lips turned down. Lily had never seen such a devestated expression on anybody's face before (not even when Petunia had woken up one morning with bright green hair and frogs in her bed); it made her heart ache.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, don't worry."

"Which is why you look like you've just sucked a lemon."

"Yup."

Lily quirked an eyebrow.

The werewolf sighed and his mouth twisted into a grimace. "He'd never want me."

Pushing away his books, he banged his head on the table.

A sad smile gracing her face, Lily made her way around the table to wrap her arms around Remus. God, he was way too hard on himself sometimes.

"Shut up, just shut up." she ran her hands through his hair (Hope James doesn't see me doing this.), "How on earth would you know that?"

"He's straight."

"Again, how do you know?"

"Isn't it obvious?" he mumbled.

"No. You never know, he might be gay."

"Yeah, and Snape is handing out sweets."

"I'll look into that."Remus glared.

"Can't you just leave me alone?"

"Nope. And if you aren't going to do anything about this, I will."

"No, please, Lily, don't! What if-?"

"You do realise that I am about to ignore everything you are going to say."

"But-!"

"Don't you glare at me, Mister! I'm going, and sooner rather than later, you'll be Sirius' and he'll be yours."

And with a large, triumphant smile, Lily twirled around and walked away.

Remus groaned and resumed the slow process of demolishing all thoughts of Sirius, Lily, Sirius, essays, Sirius and so on.

"Ow," thump. "Ow," thump. "Ow," thump.

--------------------------------------------

Remus sighed as he exited the library, mentally preparing for the whirlwind of activity he didn't know was coming. As he walked down the corridor, his mind wandered, back to the very same thing, or person, that Lily had been talking to him about. Hmphf, more like interrogating. He smashed into something hard and crashed to the ground, pulling someone down with him.

"Whoa, Remus!"

Remus' head snapped up and his shocked gaze landed on the dark-haired male he was currently lying on top of.

"What's up, Rem?" Sirius asked, as if lying down with your best friend on top of you was a regular occurrence.

"N-nothing much, y'know, the usual... Um, you?"

"Yeah, just- You need to eat more, Remus!"

"Huh?"

"You're so light! That's it, I'm taking you to the Great Hall for dinner."

He rolled Remus off of him and then leapt up, grabbing Remus' hand as he went. Being Sirius, of course, he forgot he was holding it, which happened to cause quite a commotion as they entered the Great Hall.

"Come on, Remus, eat!"

"I'm, er, not hungry..." Remus said, as he looked around at all the curious stares the students of Hogwarts were sending them.

Whispers flew around the hall like wildfire-

They're GAY?

Are they holding hands!?

They're GAY?

Why would someone like Remus want to go out with Sirius?

They're mother-fucking GAY?

Haha, James, I told you I was right!

Sirius, of course, remained absolutely unaware and was still piling food on to Remus' plate. Remus, however, was completely still in shock and comprehension, as he had just realised why the rumours were circulating.

"Um, Sirius, you might want to- mphf-!" The sentence was interrupted when Sirius shoved a fork full of food in his mouth.

"Eat up, Remus!"

This only served to increase the number and intensity of the rumours, as well as making girls giggle and 'awww' at them and boys wolf-whistle.
It was only when Lily approached the two and congratulated them on their newfound relationship did Sirius realise what was going on. His eyes widened and food sprayed out of his mouth like a fountain. Which happened to land all over Peter.

"What!? You think we're together?!" Sirius yelled, catching the attention of almost everyone in the hall. Lily shrugged.

"Well, you are holding hands and you were feeding him just now."

"What!?" Sirius looked down at their clasped hands and wrenched them apart. "You've got it all wrong. I'm not gay! And I'm definitely not going out with Remus!"

Remus flinched.

"I mean, not that I wouldn't, you know, want to... IF I was girl..." Sirius corrected himself, noticing the hurt that flashed in Remus' eyes. Remus nodded and bit his lip, not meeting Sirius' eyes.

"The first thing to do when in a hole is stop digging."

"...Yeah, um."

"You morons are the thickest people I have ever met! Well, apart from James... But anyway, you, Sirius, are in love with Remus and you, Remus, are in love with Sirius. Can you quite manage that?"

Sirius, for the first time since he could remember, blushed.

"What? No, of course I can't. Remus and I are both straight!"

Remus opened his mouth to contradict the statement, but was interrupted by the spitfire named Lily.

"Remus is gay, you imbecile! You've been living with him for nearly six years, how can you not have noticed?"

"What? How come you didn't tell me Remus?" James choked on the potatoes he had been eating.

"Don't get involved, James!" yelled Lily and Sirius, both red-faced and irritated.

"Alright, alright. Gawd, you guys get so stressed!"

"James, I'm warning you. Now Sirius, Remus, follow."

As they left the hall, six hundred pairs of eyes followed them.

--------------------------------------

Standing outside the hall, Sirius looked absolutely bewildered. Remus stood behind Lily, silently praying to God that she would shut up soon.

"Evans, where the hell did this come from?"

"You."

"Huh?"

"You, Sirius Black, are obsessed with the aforementioned Remus Lupin."

"... Huh?"

"Every time you look at him, your eyes light up. Every time you hear his voice, your stress melts away. Every time you touch, you feel your heart beat faster."

"How the hell would you know?"

"That's how I feel about James." Realisation crashed down around her and soft smile tugged at her lips.

The two canines were stunned into silence. Their eyes connected over the motionless redhead between them; the only thing separating them at that moment. Gold met silver, the air sparked and crackled uncontrollably. Remus broke first, lowering his eyes and wringing his hands.

Why did things have to be so complicated?

"I can't love you because-"

"Hurry up Black," her lovesick demeanor fell and the spitfire returned, "if you don't give me a reason in the next ten seconds, I see you joining James in a frilly dress."

Why did girls like Lily have to- a frilly dress? What? Lily snapped her fingers in front of his face impatiently. Now was not the time to be thinking about frilly dresses. Remus, however, glared at Lily. She was ruining everything. Couldn't she see that Sirius would never like him, let alone love him!? He had just said it, for Merlin's sake!

"Lily, please stop it." Remus said firmly. "Now."

Lily opened her mouth to protest but caught sight of his pleading face and shut it slowly. The energy seemed to drain out of her and she sighed.

"Fine. Whatever. But Black, just know this- this is your last chance to tell Remus you love him. Ever."

Sirius bit his lip. "I'm-....Sorry...- I-"

Lily looked at Sirius. "You fool."

She turned away, freezing when she spotted James leaning against a wall. Silently he held out a hand towards her, knowing no words were needed. Slipping her hand into his, he led her away.

---------------------------------

Tension clogged the air, so thick it was suffocating.

Remus didn't want to be there. He didn't want to feel the tears coursing down his cheeks, didn't want to feel the tiny shattered pieces of his heart breaking even further. He began to turn away, wanting to hide the shameful tears that burned.

With a strangled cry, Sirius flew across the corridor, flinging his arms around the startled werewolf. Why was he leaving? How could he just go like this? Didn't Remus understand why he was doing what he was doing?

He clutched at Remus, his fingers fisting in his shirt. Murmurs filled Remus' ears.

"I'msorryi'msorryi'msorryiloveyouiloveyouiloveyou..."

The kiss was clumsy and imperfect, yet flawless in almost every way. Teeth clicked and nipped, desperate.

It was wrong, it was right, it was everything they had ever wanted.

-----------------------------------------------

It was the first of many, many kisses. Kisses that were soft and tender. Kisses that were needy and passionate. Kisses that blew the mind.

The students and teachers of Hogwarts gradually got used to the sight of the couple together, however, unfortunately, they would never be able to get used to the image of James Potter in a frilly pink dress (with matching heels).

Like it? Hate it?
Review?