A/N: Sooo, my first NaruSasu fic...ness. Sasuke is totally a drama queen and loves all things emo, so be warned. (Am I doing the seme-uke thing right...it's seme before uke or the other way around?)

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Just the story line of my fic.

Rock, Paper, Scissors

The New Guy

ANBU Private Investigations Headquarters

I sat at my desk, scanning my room rather than reading the file I was supposed to be. My feet lay on my desk and I held the file but hadn't even read one word beyond: Robbed.

A man had been robbed, boo-hoo. Who cares, I certainly don't. He'd live but I just couldn't keep living. I am in a room that doesn't even have the slightest bit of darkness to it. Kakashi, my boss, has forbidden it. He said, "No thick layers of dust, no spider webs, no lacey black things." I mean come on! How was a man, and quite a handsome one at that, as myself supposed to live without my personnel touch of dark to my office.

My ENTIRE family, extended and all, were dead all at the hands at my Mafia obsessed brother, Itachi. Oh how I wanted a case with him involved, Him and his Akatsuki. They fucking wore DRESSES! D-R-E-S-S-E-S and pranced around murdering people for money. Oh, how it disgusted me.

I needed darkness to fill the void he had left and to show all that I was indeed the emoest of them all. Sadly my mirror, exported from the Mist City (best mirrors in the world), didn't tell me if I was emoest of them all, but I would live. I mean no one else had lost their entire family at the hands of their trans-sexual brother.

I sighed, looking back at the file…It seemed to have a fair bit of dust on it…I glanced around for any sign of Kakashi. Then I grabbed my little black handkerchief, that's right it was black because white just doesn't give off the whole 'I'm emo, pity me' vibe. I had just put the handkerchief on the file when Kakashi hollered, "NO DUST!" I glared at no one in particular and damned the accursed man.

"I can't do this! Arg!" I had just had an argument with Kakashi which had landed me in a bit of a tight spot. I had a feeling that the new guy who we had been expecting of lately would have some sort of close tie in with me. I'd either be his mentor, which I didn't mind, since I would make the best of mentors…Or the worst thing that could happen to me right now. Kakshi could partner me off with guy…Ew. That could possibly ruin my image!

"Saskue, read the damn file!" Kakashi hollered out of nowhere. I looked up, and glared in the direction of the voice. I need a better assignment than this…He was robbed, so what? That happens all the time! They get robbed, come complain to the ANBU and that's that. God damned people.

I grunted in response, quite sure the silver haired man had heard seeing as he had strange listening and seeing abilities. I glanced back at the file I was holding and brought my feet so they met the floor rather than the paperwork situated on my desk.

I glanced at it, reading over what had happened. It was then that Kakashi entered my room. "New guy's here."

I controlled his sudden urge to go and smack the silver-haired man for ever thinking about getting a new guy in the company. I hated new guys. A prime example would be that other angsty guy that worked at ANBU P.I. What was his name….? Oh yeah, Negi. That guy just wouldn't give up on trying to look more emo than me, but of course he failed every time.

I got out of my seat, tossing the case aside. I didn't plan on doing anything about it anyways, so who cared if it fell to the ground and scattered all over the floor.

Kakashi sighed at my actions but left his office to get to the New Guy. I followed, rather reluctantly. I didn't want to meet him but I had, to so I could make sure that I was still the top dog.

As I stepped out of his office I watched Negi walk past, tossing his hair to the right…I guess long hair gets in the way of the emo flip.

I flipped my hair so that it got out of my eyes and Negi almost growled. I smirked smugly and went off in the direction of Kakashi's office.

I stepped into the boss's office to find a bright blonde head reflecting all the light in the room off his hair. I fought the urge to cover my eyes.

"Sasuke, meet Naruto."

Naruto…he already sounds annoying.

I glared at the flock of yellow right before he turned around and smiled widely. I felt my eye twitch because of the immense happiness on the guy's face. Was he an alien?

"HEY!" The boy screamed getting out of his seat to greet me. He extended his hand but I was in fear of catching his disease, toomuchhappinitis. It would ruin my image, an image I spent so many years perfecting. I didn't want to touch his hand but I saw Kakashi give me his, "Do it now," look. I slowly and with a slight tinge of fear, took his hand and shook it but quickly let go.

"Hi." My response was short. I didn't want to talk to the blue-eyed freak show, however pretty he happened to be….Wait! WHAT DID I JUST SAY!? Er…think…

My face suddenly felt red but I quickly hid it underneath my usual angtsy mask of glory. The blonde turned around to look at Kakashi. "Can he not smile?" He asked. I glared harder at the guy at his comment. Of course I could smile, why else would the ladies be after me. My smile was so beautiful that it could blind the people who saw it.

Kakashi chuckled, "I've wondered the same thing Naruto." I turned my glare at Kakashi, the nerve of that guy.

"Well, both of you have a seat." Kakashi moved his hand towards two seats that sat in front of his desk. I saw his perverted book sitting on his desk. Why did he get to add his little touch to his office and not me! The hypocrite! I glared harder at him and 'humphed' as I sat down in my seat.

As if reading my mind he retorted, "I'm the boss, if I want my book, I get it. You don't get your black lacey things 'cause I say so. Besides…you just get carried away all the time." Sasuke hated him, HATED. He wanted to growl but then the new guy wouldn't think to highly of him. Not that he cared what the Dobe thought…Dobe…I like it. Sasuke you're a genius!

"The reason I've called you here Sasuke is because I'm partnering you up with Naruto." My eyes widened.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" I roared. I was on my feet and looking fiercely at the old, grey-haired idiot.

"Sasuke how many times do I have to tell you, no swearing. You're the only one without a partner —"

I cut him off, "I don't need a fuckin' partner! I'm fine on my own." I growled, remembering that I had a "dark, didn't talk that much" image to withhold.

Kakashi sighed, "Sasuke you're being partnered off. I don't care. We all need a partner. The Akatsuki travel in pairs. It'll take two of you to take them down, even if you do have the best gun aim in the entire city."

I wanted to strangle the guy, instead I looked over at the puppy I would have to take care of. My nose scrunched up in disgust. He had no sense of style what-so-ever. I mean who the hell wore bright orange jump suits? He reminded me of the bushy eyebrow guy, who wore the green jump suit. Something told me, I was definetly not going to like this guy.

Than again, I didn't really like anyone. But what was with the, him being "pretty" comment?

A/N: Yes, so this is the extremeness of Sasuke OOC! YAY!! Actually they all seem OOC...BUT THAT'S THE FUN OF IT! WH00T! Yes, well, hope you guys enjoyed. Review my darlings and make me smile!