[Author's Note: I know you guys probably want me to work on my Return to Avalon fic, but due to lack of inspiration and me getting annoyed as hell with trying to establish a credible mythos without gaping plot holes, I have decided to put it on the back burner for the time being. Instead, I give you a tale of shock, terror, poetry, Creepypasta, bad babysitters and -GASP- German Folklore! Sit back and enjoy. -Kaylee]
"But mom! Jenny, Stacy and I've been planning this sleepover all month!" Candace shut the refrigerator door behind her, frowning angrily as she popped open her can of soda.
Linda Flynn-Fletcher, her mother, continued moving around. "I'm sorry Candace, but this trip came up at the last minute and we couldn't possibly find anybody to watch the boys on such short notice!"
Candace humphed sarcastically. "You could let them stay home alone. If they can build a beach in the backyard, I'm sure they could handle not burning the house down for one lousy weekend."
"Candace, don't start with me again." Linda sat down next to her daughter. "For one thing, they're nine years old. I don't doubt that Phineas and Ferb are responsible boys, but it just isn't safe to leave them all alone. And for another thing, you still haven't shown me any proof that they ever DID build a beach in the yard. Or anything else you've claimed this summer."
The teen tapped the side of her head, thinking. "Wait a minute...You guys are leaving tonight, right? And you have to spend the day getting ready? What if...I could find them a babysitter! Totally! Mom, if I could do that, could I still go to Jenny's, please please please?" Candace did her best "puppy dog pout".
Linda sighed, feeling that she should at least let Candace try. "Oh, alright. But I want them to have references, and mannequins don't count as sitters!"
"YES! Thank you mom, thank you!" Candace hugged her mother tightly, getting a little smile, before the teen dashed outside in a blur. She decided to cross through the yard, stopping at the old tree to try and get a bit of an opinion out of her two brothers. "Hey boys?," she asked sweetly, trying to get them to take the bait. "You know how I'm usually in charge when mom and dad have to go on trips like this?"
Phineas nodded. "Yeah...but only if a satellite crashes into the house, right?"
Her voice took on a sharper tone. "That's beside the point." She changed her tone back to the saccharine slickness it was before. "Well, I was wondering; how would you guys feel about someone else being in charge this weekend? Like, a new babysitter maybe? It could be an adventure! And I know you like meeting new people."
Phineas smiled obliviously."Yeah. Yeah, we do like meeting new people. And we LOVE adventure"
Candace grinned happily. "Great! Do you think you would mind maybe helping me look around for someone to stay here by tonight?"
The boys shrugged. "Sure. Ferb! I know what we're gonna do today!"
A few hours later, Candace scanned available ads for sitters around the neighborhood, mostly teenage girls and the occasional old lady, with the creepy old guy thrown in every so often. The young woman sighed unhappily. "It's no use! I'll never find another person to watch the boys and I'll be stuck at home instead of at Jenny's! We were going to do our nails and watch movies and stuff! Together!" In the middle of her rambling, something at the very edge of the paper caught her eye; an ad for an available sitter! Available; Reliable sitter Edie Dewitt, Danville local of German origin. Knows CPR, First Aid and Trained to handle any situation. Has references, call 555-4592. Candace squealed happily. "She sounds perfect! MOM! I FOUND A SITTER FOR THE WEEKEND!"
Later that day, a willowy young woman stood in the family kitchen, listing her qualifications and showing her references. "Now, Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher, I can assure you that everything will be fine. If you need my number, I have it available and you can call whenever you feel you need to." The girl's voice was deep, German and raspy, but feminine and reassuring somehow. It was as if when you heard her, everything would be alright. Of course you could trust Edie Dewitt, despite her peculiar appearance. The girl's eyes were the color of Mountain Dew and had curvy pupils like a cat's. She had long, long brown dreadlocks, starting from the very top of her widow's peak and reaching down almost to her knees. Her skin seemed as if it had never seen the sun, and a gold, almost microscopic Scarab beetle stud clung to her left nostril. Edie's jeans were ripped and her dark purple overcoat was too hot for the weather outside. And yet despite all of this, she smiled warmly and appeared welcoming and sweet.
Linda smiled. "Well, I must say, you have outstanding recommendations, and you are CPR Certified. At first I wasn't sure, but... Ms. Dewitt, you're hired."
Edie smiled knowingly. "Thank you, ma'am. And please, you may call me Edie. I hope you have a wonderful trip."
"We certainly will." Linda hugged and kissed her kids goodbye. "I'll miss you guys. Be good for Edie, okay? Listen to her. And Candace, have fun at your sleepover!"
"I will mom!" Candace rushed out the door before anything else could be said.
Phineas and Ferb nodded their agreement to the conditions of their mother, hugging her goodbye as she left. When the door closed, Edie put her coat on the rack and sat down. "You boys go ahead and play, I won't bother you.
The next few hours in the house were odd to say the least. The boys pretty much carried on as normal, planning for the next day and playing outside, and Edie watched them. Something seemed a bit off, though. She watched them, but not as an adult watches over a child. More the way a scientist does a lab rat. They ordered pizza that night, but Edie didn't touch any of it. In fact, it seemed to disgust her. The boys knew it was freaky, but they decided not to press the matter. She could have a food allergy or something and maybe not be comfortable sharing it with anyone.
As it got darker, the new sitter seemed to be getting more and more restless. She watched what the boys were doing, of course, but she was noticeably more fidgety and high-strung. Phineas and Ferb were getting creeped out. Phin went up to Edie at around nine o'clock, smiling nervously. "Well, Edie, we had a lot of fun so far, but right now we have to get to bed. Goodnight!"
As he turned around to go upstairs, Edie stopped him. "Wait!" She smiled sweetly and yet unsettlingly. "If you boys go get ready for bed, I'll meet you upstairs in ten minutes. I have a kind of surprise for you."
He froze; what else could he say? She was in charge. "S-Sure..."
Edie's face seemed to flash to something different for a split second before it changed back to an unreadable expression.
As the boys lay in bed, Edie sat down on the floor, brown tendrils of hair swirling to the floor like seaweed. She held a flashlight to her face, making her bright green eyes appear yellow and catlike. Her raspy German accent highlighted the disturbed elation in her voice. "Submitted for the approval of you boys, I have a little story to read. My father taught it to me when I was a little one, it being an important legend to our family." Her already wide bow-mouth stretched out even further into a twisted, swallow-you-whole grin. "This poem is entitled, The Erlking."