It was something about the fence that separated you from me when we were younger. Strangely...my first memory of you comes from that fence. You had just moved in next door to me from Boston, and you caught my eye as soon as you stepped foot out of the U-Haul. Blonde and black hair. Dorky yet adorable glasses. And the goofiest grin I had ever seen.
To be honest...your smile irritated me at first. You were always so annoyingly cheerful..just seeing that smile made me feel frustrated and exhausted throughout most of our school days, especially in high school. Passing you in the hallways surrounded by your usual company, brushing against you in the cafeteria on the way to my solitary spot in the corner table, or hearing about how you scored the winning home run at last night's baseball game...annoying.
But there was one thing that I never admitted...
Another vivid memory that I have of you...
The day I saw you crying after graduation night...
Although I graduated in the top ten of our class, I was never able to understand why someone like you would cry. You had always been well liked, highly admired, and extremely popular with members of the opposite sex. You always had either a bright smile or a cheesy grin on your face..or this sparkle in your eye that could make even the goth kids smile a bit. So why..why were you crying that night?..
I regretted not being able to ask when I had the chance.. But ever since that night my sleep was troubled because I was thinking about you so much. At the time I was unsure.. I didn't have the slightest clue why the sight of you crying troubled me so much. For hours I stayed up through the Summer, often looking out my bedroom window in hopes that I would catch a glimpse of you.. Just a small glimpse to make sure that you were okay.
But I didn't see you...
The Summer ended, and in the following Fall I moved into my dorm room at college. My parent's wanted me to attend Harvard or Yale, but I decided to go to a small university. My mind would often drift back to that memory of you crying everywhere I went. I became so used to not sleeping that I just stayed up late reading literature or browsing Facebook so see what our classmates were up to. It was also on one of those nights that I decided to search for you, but came up empty handed.
Not being able to see you.. That smile. Those eyes. Those dorky glasses. It frustrated me even more. One morning I decided to leave my dorm earlier than usual, caught the bus into town, and decided to take a stroll. I didn't care where I went that day. I didn't care about my classes. I just...felt like I didn't care about anything any more.
My feet lead me to a small corner bookstore that was having a half-priced sale on overstocked materials. At first I hesitated to enter...but I've never turned down a good sale. A voice in the back told me that they would be with me briefly and to just ring the bell on the counter when I was ready, so I began to browse for a James Paterson novel.
That day..was a day that I never want to forget.
After ringing that bell..after seeing that familiar smile..blonde and black hair..as well as those dorky glasses.. You looked so happy and cheerful. The person that I was used to seeing playing on the other side of the fence as a child, the popular kid at school, the home run hitter at baseball games. Ronald Knox...
"Ronald?..."
"Sebastian?..."
That day you seemed just as surprised to see me as I was to see you. Hopefully I didn't come off as a stalker or creepy because I stared, but you just laughed and smiled that goofy smile of yours are you scanned my books. "Still reading, eh? That's so like you, Sebastian."
The thing I never admitted?
Well...now it's very simple to explain. The thing I never admitted was that I had fallen in love with you. I didn't realize it until I kept thinking back to that day I saw you crying after graduation. I always wanted to see you smiling, and that tears don't belong on a face as perfect as yours. Maybe it's the romance novels I have stashed away in my storage box talking but...until I met you Ronald, I never knew how it felt to love someone...
"Ronald?.."
"Yes, Sebastian?"
"Would you...mind joining me for coffee later?..."