Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, its characters, or its plot. If I did, Destiel would be canon and Bobby and Charlie would still be alive. I also don't own Hamilton: An American Musical, its songs, or its lyrics. If I did, it wouldn't be nearly as good as it is now, because I'm not that talented.
"I don't pretend to know the challenges you're facing, the worlds you keep erasing and creating in your mind. But I'm not afraid… If I could grant you peace of mind… That would be enough."
Castiel has never been one to be easily impressed. He is an angel of the Lord for Heaven's sake, there isn't any need for him to be impressed by humans or their insignificant creations. After all, his Father was the one who had created the humans in the first place. Angels, however, were created to love and defend Heaven and their Father so it makes sense, to Castiel, that angels can feel love. Or, more accurately, can feel what others love.
When Castiel touched Dean Winchester's soul for the first time, he, despite the time constraint, had to pause and simply take in the amount of love that he felt emanating from this human soul. Castiel could clearly see, and feel, why Dean Winchester was the Righteous Man. He didn't love many things, Castiel had noticed, but what he did love, he did so so strongly. Castiel had never felt such an emotion from anyone. Sure, angels loved their Father but, Castiel had mused, angels felt something closer to devotion than love, if Dean Winchester's emotions were to be believed.
As Castiel looks at Dean now, so hurt and broken, bloodied and beaten by Castiel's own hand, he can't help but look upon Dean in wonder. With every blow, every point of contact, Castiel feels Dean's love. His love for his brother, for Bobby Singer, for Jo and Ellen Harvelle, for Castiel. Dean is nearly unconscious from Castiel's hand and Dean still loves him.
Castiel can think of nothing else long after he parts from Dean. He knew that Dean loved fiercely and deeply and that his loyalty, once given, was unshakable. He just hadn't known that Dean was so loyal to him. That Dean loved him. He still can't really believe it. But still, Castiel says nothing. Dean has more important things to worry about and Castiel would only be a distraction. In Stull Cemetery, with Dean, Bobby, Lucifer in Sam's body, and Michael in Adam's, Castiel holds his tongue. One look at Dean is all it takes for Castiel to gather the courage to banish Michael with holy fire. He cannot let Dean be ruined by Michael. He simply can't. When Castiel is brought back by the power of his Father, he heals Dean, of course he does. When he sees Dean's agony at losing Bobby, Castiel has to bring him back. He has no choice. Deciding to leave Dean and try to bring order to Heaven is one of the most difficult decisions that he's had to make but it must be done. Dean deserves a life without chaos. He deserves a family, a stable home, a normal life. That cannot be achieved with an angel imposing upon him. Castiel, however, can't just let Dean remain unprotected (though, he was sure, Dean would be cross to hear Castiel think as much) so Castiel gets Sam back. He places Sam in front of Lisa's house so he can join Dean. Castiel, secure in the knowledge that Dean will be safe and happy, ascends to Heaven to sort out a new order.
A/N: Hey guys, I know I haven't updated in way too long but I swear, none of my stories are abandoned. I WILL update. I'm writing for all of them, I'm just doing it all at once. I've marked this as complete because I don't know if I'll write another chapter or not. I have one in the works from Dean's POV that picks up right at s6ep1 but I don't know if I'll finish it or not.
Please review, even if it's just to point out a typo.
Live Long and Prosper,
Karia