Title: On The Edge.
Author: Carly.
Rating: R.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story.
Summary: Amy discovers a way of coping with problems...but it certainly isn't the best solution.
Note: The main theme of this story is drawn from personal experience after I had some problems and found that the physical pain helped the emotional and mental pain. This story is to help people understand that self-harming is certainly not the way to cope.
Another horrible day had passed. Amy slammed the door shut of her hotel room and hurried into the bathroom, sinking to the floor. Rolling up her sleeves, she observed the cuts on her arms. Her entire arms covered in scars where she had hurt myself with a sharp object of some form. Amy was twenty-six and had a busy career, many other problems in addition to also cope with and no one to talk to. Amy had always known she was somehow different from everybody else. There was something deep inside of her telling her she was an individual. She figured she had different expectations of her life, something people couldn't accept. That's all she felt by other people, misunderstood. So, she shut away from everyone. And this day had been very much like any other. Getting hassled by her friends for whatever reason, stress through work as well as family problems. Not to mention that she'd caught her boyfriend cheating on her the day before.
With the tears slipping down her cheeks, she grabbed a scissors and took the sharp metal to her arm, feeling it penetrating the skin. She watched as the blood oozed out, as though he pain was being released too. Standing up, she cleaned the wound up and wrapped it firmly in bandages. Just as she was walking out of the bathroom and rolled down her sleeves, Matt walked through the door. He smiled at her then sat on the edge of the bed. The cut was still incredibly sore and she wanted to cry, but she wouldn't let herself, not in the presence of Matt.
"So, what have you been doing?" he asked, motioning for her to join him on the bed.
"Nothing!" she snapped, stunning him. "It's just...I'm just really tired. Sorry."
"It's okay. I've noticed you've been stressed out lately so how about me, you and Jeff do something next week?"
"Umm, I'll have to see if I'm not already busy. I'm going to bed. Night." She quickly changed into a long sleeved t-shirt and bottoms, and then climbed into her bed. But instead of going to sleep, she recalled the earlier events of that day and mutely cried, socking the pillow beneath her. Vince had yelled at her for being late, Trish had argued with her after finding out that she'd made one comment about her, Stephanie had called her a selfish bitch for not caring when she talked about her pregnancy, and she had yelled at Matt and Jeff after claiming that they were prying in her business. The subject about Steph's pregnancy upset her the most as it brought back the time when her boyfriend forced her to have an abortion. Nobody knew about it and she had no intention of telling anyone either.
The next morning, she was eating breakfast alone in the hotel restaurant when she saw her friends enter, laughing and joking without a care in the world. Amy wanted to be happy as well but problems were stopping her from doing so. Some fans interrupted her and asked for her autograph. Although Amy had sunk into deep depression, the fans made life worthwhile. They loved her for who she was, but not really knowing how she really felt inside. She always put on a brave face for WWF shows...and makeup on her arms to masquerade her scars. She was eating her food and minding her own business when she saw Matt, Steph and Trish talking while all looking at her. Furious, she left the table after giving the trio evil looks. Jeff ran after her and found her in the hall.
"Ames, what's wrong?" he asked, concerned.
"My so called friends making it so damn obvious that I'm the topic of their fucking conversation," she yelled. Matt came around the corner to see what the commotion was about. "Fuck you Mat. If you've got something to say, at least have the guts to say it to my face. Consider us ex-friends from now on," she screamed in his face, without giving him a chance to explain.
"What the hell just happened here? He questioned to his younger brother who shrugged, just as confused. "Something is definitely up with her." Inside the room, Amy was crying uncontrollably and the blood poured from her arms again. She groaned through the pain, gritting her teeth together as the scissor blade pierced into her. Snapping her eyes open from a knock at the door, she quickly placed a plaster on the deep cut and answered the door. But there stood her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend, Veronica. They quickly explained that they were on a romantic weekend before sharing a passionate kiss in front of her, obviously rubbing it in her face. She slammed the door in their faces, pretending not to care but inside, her heart was breaking. Feeling the anger rise in her body, she dug the blade into skin once again. She knew what she was doing was wrong and dangerous, but at the same time it did help her. Cleaning the blood away and covering the bandages more firmly around
her arms again, she fell to the bed crying. This carried on over the next two months until one day; she couldn't take it any longer.
One horrendously bad day in particular made her realise that there was no use in living. She was at the hotel, curled up in a ball, crying into the pillow. Amy was cold and lonely. She didn't want to go on anymore. Remembering those favourite words, `if you're going to do something, do it properly,' she retrieved the scissors from her cosmetic bag and laid them on her bed. She quickly scribbled down a note on a piece of paper then left it on the table next to the bed. She had written:
`To whomever finds me,
I couldn't cope any longer so I had to end things. Tell my friends goodbye and they were good mates but I shut them out. I know I shouldn't have done so but it's too late now. I'm sorry for this.
Love Amy.'
Picking up the scissors for the last time, she deeply slit her wrists, burying them into the veins. She began to feel dizzy and after a few moments, she collapsed on the bed. She couldn't see anymore, only blackness. She blankets that covered the bed were drenched in her blood. Steph was entering Amy's room when she saw her lying in a pool of blood. She began screaming at the top of her voice. Next door, Matt heard the screams and ran to see what was happening. Instant fear filled his complete body at the sight of Amy.
"Oh my god! Phone for an ambulance," he yelled, panicking. "Amy, what happened to you?" he cried, whispering to her. He picked her up and cradled her in his arms. Her body was limp and her breathing was becoming shallower. "I can't believe I didn't see how depressed you were." Within minutes, paramedics filled the room and they placed Amy onto a stretcher, rushing her to the ambulance. Everyone came to out from their rooms to see was had happened. Matt banged on Jeff's on passing, panic filled in his eyes. "Jeff, Amy tried killing herself. Come on, we need to get to the hospital." Jeff ran with his older brother into the ambulance and they all sped to the hospital where Amy was rushed to Intensive Care. "I can't believe we weren't there for her, bro. We've all been busy but god..."
"Matt, calm down. It'll be okay. Once she wakes up, we'll talk to her and promise to always be there from now on," he reassured. After several hours of waiting, the doctor approached them to explain that she was in stable condition and that she had had a history of self-harming. "You mean she cut herself? We never knew. Can we please see her?" The doctor nodded and the two rushed in to see their friend who was lying in the bed, looking incredibly guilty. They all shared hugs and tears before chatting about everything for an hour. Amy told them about her uncaring father, selfish mother, lack of trust in friends, abusive boyfriends and about the forced abortion. Now realising what she'd been through, Matt and Jeff vowed they'd always be there for her. A month later, her and Matt were lying in bed together, talking when he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.
"Ames, I know you've been through so much and I'm proud that you don't resolve to cutting yourself now," he said, leaning their foreheads together.
"Don't worry. I don't anymore. It feels so good knowing that I can rely on you and Jeff," she said, interlacing their legs together for warmth. She had Matt had grown incredibly close over the past few weeks and was so grateful for his friendship.
"Listen, you know about three months ago when you blew up whilst I was talking to Steph and Trish, it's because they were giving me some advice about telling you that...I love you!"
"What?" she smiled happily. "I had no idea," she laughed, hugging him tightly. After pulling away, she pressed their lips together passionately. "I love you too, Matt. I'm so glad you saved me from the brink of life."
The End
Author: Carly.
Rating: R.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story.
Summary: Amy discovers a way of coping with problems...but it certainly isn't the best solution.
Note: The main theme of this story is drawn from personal experience after I had some problems and found that the physical pain helped the emotional and mental pain. This story is to help people understand that self-harming is certainly not the way to cope.
Another horrible day had passed. Amy slammed the door shut of her hotel room and hurried into the bathroom, sinking to the floor. Rolling up her sleeves, she observed the cuts on her arms. Her entire arms covered in scars where she had hurt myself with a sharp object of some form. Amy was twenty-six and had a busy career, many other problems in addition to also cope with and no one to talk to. Amy had always known she was somehow different from everybody else. There was something deep inside of her telling her she was an individual. She figured she had different expectations of her life, something people couldn't accept. That's all she felt by other people, misunderstood. So, she shut away from everyone. And this day had been very much like any other. Getting hassled by her friends for whatever reason, stress through work as well as family problems. Not to mention that she'd caught her boyfriend cheating on her the day before.
With the tears slipping down her cheeks, she grabbed a scissors and took the sharp metal to her arm, feeling it penetrating the skin. She watched as the blood oozed out, as though he pain was being released too. Standing up, she cleaned the wound up and wrapped it firmly in bandages. Just as she was walking out of the bathroom and rolled down her sleeves, Matt walked through the door. He smiled at her then sat on the edge of the bed. The cut was still incredibly sore and she wanted to cry, but she wouldn't let herself, not in the presence of Matt.
"So, what have you been doing?" he asked, motioning for her to join him on the bed.
"Nothing!" she snapped, stunning him. "It's just...I'm just really tired. Sorry."
"It's okay. I've noticed you've been stressed out lately so how about me, you and Jeff do something next week?"
"Umm, I'll have to see if I'm not already busy. I'm going to bed. Night." She quickly changed into a long sleeved t-shirt and bottoms, and then climbed into her bed. But instead of going to sleep, she recalled the earlier events of that day and mutely cried, socking the pillow beneath her. Vince had yelled at her for being late, Trish had argued with her after finding out that she'd made one comment about her, Stephanie had called her a selfish bitch for not caring when she talked about her pregnancy, and she had yelled at Matt and Jeff after claiming that they were prying in her business. The subject about Steph's pregnancy upset her the most as it brought back the time when her boyfriend forced her to have an abortion. Nobody knew about it and she had no intention of telling anyone either.
The next morning, she was eating breakfast alone in the hotel restaurant when she saw her friends enter, laughing and joking without a care in the world. Amy wanted to be happy as well but problems were stopping her from doing so. Some fans interrupted her and asked for her autograph. Although Amy had sunk into deep depression, the fans made life worthwhile. They loved her for who she was, but not really knowing how she really felt inside. She always put on a brave face for WWF shows...and makeup on her arms to masquerade her scars. She was eating her food and minding her own business when she saw Matt, Steph and Trish talking while all looking at her. Furious, she left the table after giving the trio evil looks. Jeff ran after her and found her in the hall.
"Ames, what's wrong?" he asked, concerned.
"My so called friends making it so damn obvious that I'm the topic of their fucking conversation," she yelled. Matt came around the corner to see what the commotion was about. "Fuck you Mat. If you've got something to say, at least have the guts to say it to my face. Consider us ex-friends from now on," she screamed in his face, without giving him a chance to explain.
"What the hell just happened here? He questioned to his younger brother who shrugged, just as confused. "Something is definitely up with her." Inside the room, Amy was crying uncontrollably and the blood poured from her arms again. She groaned through the pain, gritting her teeth together as the scissor blade pierced into her. Snapping her eyes open from a knock at the door, she quickly placed a plaster on the deep cut and answered the door. But there stood her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend, Veronica. They quickly explained that they were on a romantic weekend before sharing a passionate kiss in front of her, obviously rubbing it in her face. She slammed the door in their faces, pretending not to care but inside, her heart was breaking. Feeling the anger rise in her body, she dug the blade into skin once again. She knew what she was doing was wrong and dangerous, but at the same time it did help her. Cleaning the blood away and covering the bandages more firmly around
her arms again, she fell to the bed crying. This carried on over the next two months until one day; she couldn't take it any longer.
One horrendously bad day in particular made her realise that there was no use in living. She was at the hotel, curled up in a ball, crying into the pillow. Amy was cold and lonely. She didn't want to go on anymore. Remembering those favourite words, `if you're going to do something, do it properly,' she retrieved the scissors from her cosmetic bag and laid them on her bed. She quickly scribbled down a note on a piece of paper then left it on the table next to the bed. She had written:
`To whomever finds me,
I couldn't cope any longer so I had to end things. Tell my friends goodbye and they were good mates but I shut them out. I know I shouldn't have done so but it's too late now. I'm sorry for this.
Love Amy.'
Picking up the scissors for the last time, she deeply slit her wrists, burying them into the veins. She began to feel dizzy and after a few moments, she collapsed on the bed. She couldn't see anymore, only blackness. She blankets that covered the bed were drenched in her blood. Steph was entering Amy's room when she saw her lying in a pool of blood. She began screaming at the top of her voice. Next door, Matt heard the screams and ran to see what was happening. Instant fear filled his complete body at the sight of Amy.
"Oh my god! Phone for an ambulance," he yelled, panicking. "Amy, what happened to you?" he cried, whispering to her. He picked her up and cradled her in his arms. Her body was limp and her breathing was becoming shallower. "I can't believe I didn't see how depressed you were." Within minutes, paramedics filled the room and they placed Amy onto a stretcher, rushing her to the ambulance. Everyone came to out from their rooms to see was had happened. Matt banged on Jeff's on passing, panic filled in his eyes. "Jeff, Amy tried killing herself. Come on, we need to get to the hospital." Jeff ran with his older brother into the ambulance and they all sped to the hospital where Amy was rushed to Intensive Care. "I can't believe we weren't there for her, bro. We've all been busy but god..."
"Matt, calm down. It'll be okay. Once she wakes up, we'll talk to her and promise to always be there from now on," he reassured. After several hours of waiting, the doctor approached them to explain that she was in stable condition and that she had had a history of self-harming. "You mean she cut herself? We never knew. Can we please see her?" The doctor nodded and the two rushed in to see their friend who was lying in the bed, looking incredibly guilty. They all shared hugs and tears before chatting about everything for an hour. Amy told them about her uncaring father, selfish mother, lack of trust in friends, abusive boyfriends and about the forced abortion. Now realising what she'd been through, Matt and Jeff vowed they'd always be there for her. A month later, her and Matt were lying in bed together, talking when he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.
"Ames, I know you've been through so much and I'm proud that you don't resolve to cutting yourself now," he said, leaning their foreheads together.
"Don't worry. I don't anymore. It feels so good knowing that I can rely on you and Jeff," she said, interlacing their legs together for warmth. She had Matt had grown incredibly close over the past few weeks and was so grateful for his friendship.
"Listen, you know about three months ago when you blew up whilst I was talking to Steph and Trish, it's because they were giving me some advice about telling you that...I love you!"
"What?" she smiled happily. "I had no idea," she laughed, hugging him tightly. After pulling away, she pressed their lips together passionately. "I love you too, Matt. I'm so glad you saved me from the brink of life."
The End