Unlike most people who work in retail, Masamune likes to think that his job is relatively decent. Most of the customers that came through Bean Me Up Cafe were reasonable with their requests, the facility was well kept and had a cozy feeling, and on top of it all, he got a 20% discount on all his drinks, something he took advantage of quite often. This job was easily the best one he'd ever had and some days he could almost say it was perfect
Almost
As great as it all was, no number of pleasant conversations between orders and discounted frappuccinos were enough to make up for the (albeit, very few) asshole customers who passed through acting like they were the top coffee connoisseurs, expecting a hole-in-the-wall coffee shop to be home to the pinnacle of all caffeinated beverages and giving him a look of disapproval when they soon realized it wasn't.
Ok, so maybe one or two of them might have actually been a coffee connoisseur, like he'd be able to distinguish them from the average joe customers. But he demanded respect from everyone who passed through this coffee shop, top coffee connoisseur or not.
But out of all the asshole-ish customers he'd ever dealt with, this damn prick definitely took the cake -and he probably ate it too...the bastard.
Just before Masamune had met the asshole who would soon ruin his day (and possibly his life) his morning had been going fairly well. He had managed to go through the entire morning rush without spilling a single drink, he'd only had to direct three angry customers to his manager, Tsubasa, and his beauty and charm had even gotten him a girl's number, which he planned on calling exactly two days later, so he didn't appear too desperate.
He'd been jamming out to a pop song behind the register, and was just about to nail the chorus with incredible passion when he showed up. At first glance, he seemed like a fairly typical guy (oh who was he kidding, he was freaking gorgeous): dark skin, dark blue hair, and rocking the good ol' art student flannel and beanie combo. He had a hopeful look on his face as he came up to the counter and honestly, Masamune hoped this guy would become a regular here...not because he liked him or anything; god! he didn't even know the guy. Any first impression Masamune had about this guy however, was thrown into the flaming pits of hell the second he opened his mouth.
"Okay, so I want a venti, half-whole milk, one quarter 1%, one quarter nonfat, extra hot, split quad shots, no foam latte, with whip, 2 packets of splenda, 1 sugar in the raw, a touch of vanilla syrup and 3 short sprinkles of cinnamon; for King, please. Oh, and hurry. I've got a class on the other side of campus that starts in 15 minutes."
Masamune was at a loss for words, too busy trying to comprehend exactly what the fuck this guy, King, was saying. Did he think Masamune was god or something? Did his spiky multicolored hair give of the impression that he was some celestial being that could carry out any task given to him? Because guess what, he fucking wasn't.
"Excuse me?" he finally managed to sputter.
King stopped in his tracks, running a hand through his perfect silky hair (dear lord he needed to calm down). "Oh, sorry did I going to fast? I want a venti, half-whole milk…"
Masamune willed himself to calm down. Losing his temper never lead to the customer admitting they were wrong, and doing so would only cause trouble for him (especially with Tsubasa in the back who could come out and see him at any time, and boy he did not want to deal with that!)
"Um, I'm sorry sir, I don't think I can make...whatever you just ordered. If you'd like something off our menu instead i'd be happy to get you it!"
That's right Masamune, patience and tranquility. Express yourself in a calm manner. This gorgeous customer will certainly be understanding and-
"Aw what? And here I thought you seemed like you knew what you were doing. Is there anyone else working right now that could make it for me?"
You know what? Fuck patience and tranquility
"What the hell dude? Nobody with even a speck of common sense would not only spiel such an abstract order that not even jesus himself would understand, but to ask for the barista to 'make it snappy' as well? We serve coffee here, not whatever the fuck you just ordered!"
Masamune felt the words come out of his mouth before he could register what he was saying, but he couldn't bring himself to regret any of it. This (extremely hot) asshole had attacked his skills as a barista; there was no backing down now.
King seemed to be taken aback by the sudden change in Masamune's tone, but the look of shock on his face was soon replaced by anger.
"Hey man! It's not my problem you suck at being a barista. If someone here can make my coffee then please get them, but if not I'm gonna find a place that can."
"Leave then!" he roared. "Take your money and shitty attitude somewhere else 'cause there's no way I can serve you when you're head's shoved that far up your ass!"
"MASAMUNE!"
The door to the back room slammed open as Tsubasa's booming voice rang through the shop, startling all of its inhabitants. Masamune himself must have set a world record with how high he jumped and King was probably a close second. He was shaking violently, probably from the seething rage that must have been on Tsubasa's face, and Masamune thought that he might just vibrate out of the vicinity.
Tsubasa moved to Masamune's left and placed a hand on his shoulder as a warning gesture.
"I'm very sorry about my co-worker, he doesn't always make the smartest of decisions" he glared at Masamune before returning to his conversation with King. "If there's anything you need please don't hesitate to ask me."
Masamune expected King to take Tsubasa up on his offer; to complain about how he 'sucks at being a barista' and try and get himself a free drink. He had served several customers who did that exact thing and he didn't put it past King do the same. However he seemed to have the impression that Tsubasa would claw his eyes out if he so much as looked at him so instead he began to back away from the counter slowly, avoiding eye contact at all costs.
"N-no it's fine" he sputtered "my class is starting so i better hurry and...bye!" he zoomed out the door, and Masamune had to force himself not to think about how well those jeans fitted him when he was running.
Oh god he was fucked
"Masamune, can I talk to you in my office please?"
And now he was double fucked.
So yeah, here's my last minute entry for AnEternalMelodyToAFlamingSoul's contest. Hope it's funny enough for you. I havent written in ages and it was honestly so much fun to write this that im thinking about continuing it. Would anyone be willing to read it if i did cause there's honestly so much i can add onto. Well either way, thanks so much for reading, ciao~