"Yuki-chan, are you almost ready?" Yori asked me as I adjusted the black ribbon around my neck. "Nearly." The reflection in front of me couldn't have been me. It was too womanly, granted that I wore a sliming black dress that hugged my waist and flared out to meet my feet, but my eyes lacked my childness excitement. Kaname had gotten me this dress so I had to be proper and thank him. I had to face him in that romantic atmosphere with its glittering people and dim candle light. I didn't want to. His eyes were too deep and held an unknown evil. When gazing into them it was the equivalent of tumbling into a black hole. You had nothing to grasp on to, no security, his wickedness was utterly hypnotizing. I shuttered against the thought. "Yuki-" Yori started but I interrupted her. "I know, I'm done." I passed her to open the door. "That's not what I meant. You're beautiful Yuki!" She grabbed my wrist, forcing me in a joyful hug. "How did you do that? Turning mature all of a sudden without even hint of make up?" I shrugged her complement off, my mind on other things. "Oh, Yuki don't pull a Kiryu! Let up and smile some." She squeezed my hand. An image of Zero's death glare appeared in my head and I knew she was thinking the same thing. Fluttery giggles filled the air as we laughed. The sound eased the knot in my chest even as we neared the white building. From outside it loomed almost completely in shadow of a carefree blue night, the massive glass windows threw inviting orange light and classical waltzes drifted faintly. "It's magical." Yori whispered more to herself than me. I suppressed a dreaded sigh as I entered the threshold. It wasn't that it was vile or any less enchanting but it felt like a princess dream I didn't deserve. Were white horses and prince charmings were the norm.
Yori left to fetch some drinks and I stood at attention; heat seared at the base of my neck and more than flushed my cheeks. How could I feel so alone and exposed in a crowd of people a saw every day? Where had this immediate shyness come from? From the corner of my eye I saw a group of day class boys staring at me and talking in muted terms. I wanted to be a big girl like I seemed and just shrug it off but I couldn't. The paranoia swelled to a max; so much my eyes were glued to my hands as I rang them out not daring to move. After what seemed like centuries, but what was surely only a handful of moments, passed. A hand tapped on my slender shoulder. My head whipped up. "Hello Yuki-chan!" Ichijo chirped happily and beamed a smile down at me. (Even if I wore high heels I was shorter than everyone there.) "You're so cute tonight! Too bad Kaname couldn't make it." He stated. My heart skipped a beat. Trying to hold back my enthusiasm I said. "He's not?..." Ichijo's former state of disappeared as he shook his head. "I'm afraid he had other matters to attend to." I nodded saying nothing pretending to understand the seriousness. "He'll be gone for quite some time-" "Ichijo! Oh, Ichijo!" a small swarm of girls cooed while fawning over themselves. "One moment." Ichijo turned; flashing them his brief but blinding grin. "Well, as I was saying he won't be here for possibly a few months." My eyebrows shot up. "Don't worry I'll protect you if you get in trouble." He slung a casual arm around my neck causing the girls to glare intensely at me. "Ichijo come dance with us." They said slowly; assuming I was stealing their man. They mocked medieval gowns and charms and had the snobbery of royalty. "Okay!" Ichijo seemed unfazed by their coolness toward me. He tightened his grip to whisper "Have a good time Yuki-chan." And then let go strolling into, what was my opinion, the claws of jealous women.
I was able to settle down into a plush chair on the balcony. Surprisingly it was empty there. No clumsy couples or star gazers, just me to wallow in my loneness. At least I learned that Kaname wouldn't be coming back soon. Before I left the dance floor I saw Zero leaning up against the wall watching the night class with those brooding eyes. I felt the need to go and comfort to him but I squelched it. Sometimes it felt good to be separate from him, from his negative aura and everlasting anger. I was being selfish tonight. Not wanting to deal with the world that was twisting around me. I just wanted to be a girl at a dance that was shy. Not flogged with all these guilty emotions. Why was everything so difficult? Complicated to the extent where there's no going back; where you always make the wrong choices. Feeling unaware of my surroundings I dug my chin into my knees, lost too deep in thought to be brought back. Tears ran freely from my eyes and some far off part of me was glad I didn't wear makeup. 'I'm going to lose someone I care about soon. They are going to die and it's going to be all my fault…' pessimistic thoughts bombarded me like a foreshadowing instinct. If ignored it could destroy.
"Yuki Cross what are you doing out here?" a warm voice beckoned me.