A Thin Line Between Best Friends And Lovers
It was hard to get oxygen into my lungs as Bobby tightened his grip around my neck. All I could think about was Frankie and Maura. "Shoot him!"
"If you do, she dies!" The more I struggled his grip would tighten. "You better listen or find a way to kill me because if you don't, I'll kill your little Medical Examiner girlfriend."
"No!" Finally getting the gun positioned downward, I forced him to pull the trigger. Pain radiated where the bullet entered and exited. I heard Maura scream my name as I hit the ground hard.
"Jane!" Running to my side, the blonde placed pressure on the wound. "You'll be okay."
Paramedics joined her. "Dr. Isles, we need to get her in the ambulance and to the hospital."
"Of course." I tried to mumble Frankie's name but nothing came. "Frankie Rizzoli is in the autopsy room. You need to get him as well. I'm riding with her." I could only imagine the serious look Maura was giving the two men who placed me on the gurney. I winced with each movement. "Jane, you'll be alright."
Smiling weakly, I took Maura's hand. "I know."
Xxx
Jane laid there and I could do nothing but comfort her. Once we arrived at the hospital, I never left my friend's side. "Dr. Isles, you need to let us take Detective Rizzoli back. You can't-,"
"John, she's not leaving Jane's side. She's a doctor so I'm allowing her to come with us." Dr. Mathews' gaze turned towards me. "You will not scrub in, but you may stay by her side." All I did was nod. "Alright, let's go!"
Standing there, I watched as Mathews operated. Jane was so pale from the amount of blood she lost. I can't lose her. I just can't. Keeping an eye on the monitors, my stomach started to drop. Her heartrate was decreasing fast. Alarms sounded and three shocks later, Jane flat lined. "Jane!" Tears rolled down my cheeks. I know it's unprofessional to cry in the workplace but my best friend is died. I can't lose her!
Stepping away from the table, Dr. Mathews gave me a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry, Dr. Isles. There's nothing else I can do. I need to call it."
Walking to Jane's side, I leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I love you Jane."
"Time of death: five fifty sev-," Mathews halted when Jane's heartrate started just enough to be in sinus rhythm. Leaning up, I studied the brunette's face. She couldn't have heard me. "It seems like she's more of a fighter than we thought."
Xxx
Dr. Mathews insisted Jane stay in the hospital a few days to make sure there weren't any further complications. Refusing to leave Jane's side, I called for Dr. Pike to take my place until further notice. Everyone hates the man but they will understand. I'm of no use if I'm constantly worried about Jane. "She'll tell you to not worry about her and go back to work, you know that right?" A soft chuckle escaped my throat when I saw Angela leaning against the doorframe.
"I know. But I won't let her wake up alone." Placing my hand gently atop Jane's I gave it a gentle squeeze to let her know I was still here. When I did, her heartrate jumped a beat faster but then went back to its original pace.
"Does that normally happen?" Angela came to sit on the bed beside her daughter.
"No. Not normally." My brow creased in confusion. Her heartbeat was untraceable during surgery until I kissed her forehead and said that I loved her. Could that have something to do with it? No. I'm being silly. There's no science to back that up.
"How is she?" Vince stood at the doorway with Detective Frost by his side.
"She's not, as you would say, out of the woods just yet. There was a complication during surgery so Dr. Mathews wants to keep her here a few days."
"Is that why you called in Dr. Pike?"
He's insinuating something. But what is it? "Yes. I'll be staying out until further notice."
"Okay." He smiled knowingly. "Between you and Angela, Jane will recover just fine. Especially since you'll force her to take it easy. You've always had that effect on her."
I'm not sure what he means by that. "Yes, I'll make sure she gets rest."
Since I was staying with Jane, Angela went to stay with Frankie. I stirred feeling someone pet my hair. "Maura?" Shooting into a sitting position, I noticed an amused look on the brunette's face. "Hey."
"You're awake." Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I stretched.
"And you fell asleep with your head beside me holding my hand." A soft blush crept up my neck. "What time is it?"
"Uh," looking at my watch, I frowned. "Two in the morning."
"Why are you still here? You have work in a few hours. You should be at home sleeping." Confusion turned into fear. "How's Frankie?" Jane's heartrate increased.
"Everything is fine. Calm down before a nurse comes rushing-,"
"Is everything okay, Dr. Isles?" Berry, the night shift nurse, stood at the doorway.
"Yes, she just woke up and is worried about her brother. She'll be fine." With a nod, he left.
"So he's going to be okay?" Her voice cracked slightly.
"Yes, he'll be fine. But you'll be here a few days because of complications during surgery." Jane's brow creased. "Does your chest still hurt?"
"Yeah, it feels like someone took a baseball bat to it multiple times."
"That's because they had to resuscitate you. The shocks didn't work at first." My voice wavered remembering what Jane looked like on the table as her heart stopped beating. "Dr. Mathews was calling your time of death when your heart started beating." I want to ask if she heard anything but I don't want to tell her why I want to know.
"Maura," I didn't realize I had been crying until Jane wiped a tear away with her thumb. "Please, don't cry." Scooting over, Jane patted the empty part of the bed. "Lay down. You need some rest."
I had already agreed mentally but I had to be cautious. "Jane,"
"No arguing. I'm the one in the hospital. I think I deserve a little pampering." Jane's grin faded when she became serious. "Obviously, I scared the hell out of you by dying." Finally, I gave in and did as she asked. Wrapping me in her arms, Jane angled us so my head would be on her shoulder. "Now, is this so bad?"
"No." I love the feeling of being in her arms. Getting lost in the sensation, I snuggled as close to the brunette as I could.
"Comfy?" All I did was nod. "Good." Carefully, I placed my hand on Jane's arm and slid my thumb into the crook of her elbow. Her pulse has increased again. Not much but it's still elevated. Resting her cheek against the top of my head, Jane sighed contently. "I'm sorry for scaring you like that. It was the only way I could keep you and Frankie safe."
"All that matters is that you're going to be okay." Moments later, what Jane said finally registered. "What do you mean it was the only way to keep me and Frankie safe?" When there wasn't a reply, I looked up. She's not really asleep. She must realize a person's breathing is shallow when they're asleep. Hers is normal. She must not have meant to say that.
Xxx
Shit. Shit. Shit. I didn't mean to say that. Maybe if I act like I'm asleep she'll let this go. No. She's too smart for that. Laying her head back against my shoulder, Maura murmured a goodnight. This is nice. She probably just agreed because I nearly died. I better enjoy this while I can. I doubt I'll ever be able to hold her like this again. The thought caused a lump to form in my throat. Why did I have to go and fall in love with my best friend?
A few hours passed and I woke feeling Maura move. Tilting my head, I felt a soft hand on my shoulder. Her grip tightened slightly as she whimpered. "Jane….you can't die…don't leave me…"
Leave her? Why would I leave her? Wait, is she dreaming about me dying? She probably is. Guilt clenched my stomach. "Maura, I'm right here." I held her closer, if that was possible. "Sssshh. I'm not going anywhere." Especially without you.
"Jane? Maura?" I groaned at my mother's voice.
Opening my eyes, the light caused pain to radiate in my head. "Hey." Gently, I shook Maura awake.
"Huh? Jane, is everything okay?" Worried green eyes met mine.
She looks beautiful in the morning. Even if she has dark circles under her eyes. "Everything's fine. Mom's here."
Slight horror crossed the blonde's face before she turned to see my mother. "Angela, good morning." Carefully, Maura moved to stand. Instantly I missed her warmth.
"Good morning." She watched us skeptically. "I brought coffee. Can Jane have caffeine yet?"
"In small, and I mean very small, amounts." Maura glared back at me. "Very small."
"Just enough to get my headache to go away?" I grinned knowing Maura couldn't stay serious when she saw it. "Wait, shouldn't you be at work?"
"I've called Dr. Pike in until further notice. I'm taking off to take care of you." I started to protest only to be cut off. "This isn't up to you Jane. You're moving into my guest room so I can take care of you. Everyone knows if you don't have one of us around, you'll overdo it and hurt yourself." Maura stood with her arms crossed.
I can't say no to that. "Okay." Geez. She's like me when I'm in an interrogation. She really does care about me.
Xxx
Over the next few days, I stayed with Jane. The only times I left the hospital grounds were to shower and get fresh clothes. I brought books and magazines with me for when Jane was asleep. "Hey Maura," Jane's voice was timid.
"Yes, Jane?" Closing the book, I gave her my full attention.
"Can you help me with something that's pretty embarrassing?" The brunette fiddled with her hospital bracelet.
"Jane, you're my best friend. Of course, I'll help you. What do you need?"
"Can you help me take a shower? With my side the way it is, I can't wash my back. And it hurts to move a lot. But I feel disgusting."
"Sure. Let me get your towel ready and everything else." Walking into the small bathroom, I set out everything Jane would need. I'm going to see the woman I love naked. Thankfully, Jane likes hot showers so I can blame any flush tone on the steam. After a few minutes, I went to retrieve Jane from the bed. "Are you ready?"
"Yeah." Jane smiled nervously as we entered the bathroom. "Thank you. I'd ask mom but, I'd rather a doctor redress the wound. Also, I think it would be hard to see me with a hole in my back."
"I understand." Turning my head, I let Jane turn on the water and strip down.
"You can look now." A soft moan escaped the taller woman's throat. "This feels amazing." I sat quietly and even more uncomfortable. I'm a horrible person. That moan slightly arousing me. "You still there, Maura?"
"Yes. Let me know when you need my help."
"I will." Jane winced in pain when she removed the dressing. I read each bottle until I was needed. "Can you do my hair? It hurts to keep my arms up for that long."
Standing, I pulled the back of the shower curtain aside just enough to reach her hair. Massaging her scalp, I looked straight ahead. I never took my eyes off my hands. "How is this?"
"Maybe I should get you to do this more. This is great."
Chuckling, I rinsed my hands and let Jane rinse her hair. "All you have to do is ask."
"Really?" She was genuinely surprised.
"Yes." Scrubbing soap in a washcloth, I waited.
"Well crap. I've been missing out all these years." We shared a laugh. "Okay, can you do my back?" Jane stood ridged as I started.
Why is she so stiff? I'm going to hurt her. It's probably just because she's vulnerable and Jane Rizzoli is anything but vulnerable. Her back is so toned. What I wouldn't do to have the opportunity to explore each inch with my hands. Biting my lip, I felt guilty. I shouldn't be thinking about Jane like this. She's my best friend and trusts me enough to be vulnerable like this. "Alright. I tried to be as careful as possible around the wound."
"I know you did." Jane smiled quickly before closing the curtain.
"Do you still need me?"
Without hesitation, Jane replied. "I'll always need you, Maura." Tension rose quickly. She's lucid enough to know what she just said. "I mean, you're my best friend. I'll always need you to keep me in line."
"To keep you in line?" I couldn't help but laugh. "I don't think that's possible."
Xxx
Finally, I was able to go home. Home being Maura's guest room, which I didn't mind. Maura and Ma got me set up in the guest room after I settled on the couch. Flipping through the channels, I couldn't find much. None of the shows Maura recorded for me held my attention. All I could think about was her and how good she was taking care of me. It's pathetic that I used the wound as a reason to have Maura help me in the shower. In my defense, the first few times I did actually need her help. After that, I just wanted her near me. Her touch was so gentle and caring. Now that we're here, I doubt she'll sleep in my arms like she has the past few nights.
"Jane, I'm going to get groceries for you and Maura. Do you want anything special?" My mother walked behind the couch and kissed my head.
"Hmm Maura always has my beer in the fridge so…"
As if on que, Maura chimed in. "No beer for you. Not while you're on pain medication."
"I know. It was a joke." Smirking at the blonde, I waited for her to join me.
"Although, could you pick up more laxatives? Jane hasn't had a bowel-,"
"Hey! Keep my bowels out of this." A deep blush burnt my face. Maura's musical laugh met my ears when I covered my head with a blanket.
"I'm sorry Jane. I'm just worried about the side effects of the pain medication." Placing a hand on my knee, she squeezed trying to apologize.
I can't stay mad at this woman. It's not fair. Smirking, I huffed. "Am I allowed to have chocolate?"
"Yes, you may have chocolate." Looking back at my mother, I asked if she could bring me my favorite salted caramel chocolate. She agreed and was out the door. "Now that you're out of the hospital, you can get caught back up on your shows. I've recorded them all for you."
Smiling, I started a random episode. "I noticed. Thank you."
"You're welcome." Opening her book, Maura began to read. "Let me know if you need anything."
"I will." A few episodes later, I continued to battle with the idea of asking for a head massage.
"You want something." Maura flipped a page. "I know that look on your face."
"How have you noticed the look on my face? You've had your nose in that book for the past hour and a half." Wait. That could backfire on me. To know the look on my face would mean she's watched me. And for me to know the fact she's not looked away from that book means I've watched her. Crap. Please don't read into this. Please Maura.
"I'm more observant than you give me credit for." Placing her book on the coffee table, Maura gave me her full attention. "What can I do for you?"
Again, I battled with myself. The need to be close to the blonde won out. "A head massage?"
"Sure." Placing a pillow on her lap, she waited for me to lie down.
"Thank you." Slender fingers started to massage through my hair. This feels amazing. Letting out a soft moan, I felt Maura's hand pause. Not very long but long enough to notice the change.
Xxx
Hopefully Jane didn't notice my pause. I need to get that under control before she finds out I'm not only attracted to her but I'm in love with her. I can't lose my best friend. I continued massaging the brunette's scalp until I noticed her breathing had changed. She looks so peaceful when she's sleeping. And so unbelievable beautiful. "I'd never leave you, Maura. I promise." She's talking in her sleep. And she's dreaming about me. I shouldn't be listening to this. Dreams are private but I don't want to wake her.
A finished book later, Jane started to stir. "Maura?"
"Yes?"
Rubbing her eyes, she peered up at me. "How long have I been asleep?"
"Just a few hours. I got to finish my book."
Sitting up, Jane carefully stretched. "You got to finish an eight hundred page book that you were only a quarter of the way through? I know you read fast but not that fast. How long have I really been asleep for?"
Biting my lip, I finally answered. "Five hours."
"Five hours?! You should have told me to move." The horrified look on Jane's face was adorable. "I'm sorry. I guess your head massage put me to sleep."
"You need your rest and I didn't mind." I hopped my smile would ease my friend's panic. It seemed to work.
Looking at the clock, Jane yawned. "Well it's late. I'm going to bed."
Standing, I helped Jane to her feet. "I'll get you settled." I know she can manage on her own but I wanted to help her. Once she was in bed, I went to turn off her light. "Goodnight Jane."
"Hey Maura?"
There's the timid voice again. "Yes?"
"Would you…uh…never mind." Rolling to her side, Jane closed her eyes. "Night."
Flipping off the lights in the house, I retired to my bedroom. As I did my nightly routine, I thought about the look Jane had. Did she want to ask if I'd sleep with her again? She used that same timid voice when we were at the hospital. Throwing caution to the wind, I entered the guest room once more. Jane had already fallen asleep when I slide between the sheets. We had done this plenty of times. Nothing has changed. Not a moment later, I felt a strong arm wrap around me.
Xxx
The next morning, I woke to the smell of Maura's shampoo and something tickling my nose. Opening my eyes, I saw nothing but blonde locks. Oh shit! Realizing where my arm was, I started to panic. Double shit. Trying to move as slowly as possible, I removed my arm. "Morning Jane." I've been caught.
"Morning." The room was filled with an awkward silence. "Sleep well?"
"I did."
She doesn't seem mad or upset that I snuggled with her all night. "Want me to make breakfast?"
Maura chuckled softly as she moved to lie on her back. "You're supposed to be recovering. Not cooking us breakfast."
"I am recovering. You're forcing me to do so. I just want to thank you besides saying 'thank you.'"
Smiling softly, she finally gave into my request. "Okay. You cook and I'll make coffee."
"You know, using a coffee pot works too. And it's less difficult than using that press thingy you have."
Maura laughed as we entered the kitchen. "I enjoy using the press thingy." A comfortable silence filled the room as I cooked French toast and Maura made coffee.
This is nice. I'm not sure how I'm going to sleep when I go home. I'll have gotten so used to this and our routines that I won't know what to do with myself. "Alright. It's ready."
"And so is the coffee. Would you like to eat at the table or the bar?"
"The bar is fine." Sliding into one of the chairs, I started to eat. Maura stood and did the same. "How do you like it?"
"It's good." The blonde tried to eat so properly it was adorable.
"Cool. Because I've never made it before." Maura nearly choked on her coffee. "Surprise."
"You've never cooked this before?" All I did was nod. "I let you cook a new dish in my kitchen."
"Well, I didn't tell you because you wouldn't have let me cook." Before Maura could argue, Ma walked in.
"Morning girls."
"Good morning, Angela. There's coffee left if you would like some."
"Thank you. How did you all sleep?"
"Good." We spoke in unison and the awkward tension came back.
Ma looked between the two of us skeptically. "Did something bad happen?"
"No." Again, in unison.
Xxx
Over the next week, routines took effect. I'm not sure how long it will take me to get back to my old routine after Jane leaves. I'm not sure how I'll sleep without her holding me either. Groaning inwardly, I ran my hands over my face. Her mannerisms have washed off on me also. Hearing Angela exit the guest room, I took a seat on the couch with my tea.
"How is she really doing?" Angela joined me on the couch.
"Jane is doing quite well. I think in a few weeks she'll make a full recovery." She knows something is different. Angela always knows.
"Well you've taken excellent care of her."
"I do what I can. Forcing Jane to take it easy is harder than it sounds."
Laughing, Angela took a sip of the tea I made her. Silence filled the room and I knew what was coming. "Do you love Jane?"
"Of course I do. She's my best friend." I knew that wasn't what she meant.
"Maura," her voice was stern. "You know you'll get hives if you lie."
"I'm not lying. I do love Jane." My anxiety rose by the second. I wanted her to drop the subject.
"I didn't mean 'love' in that way Maura."
"I know. Can we please leave it alone?" The blood drained from my face when I blurted out my response. I felt better since my secret wasn't a secret anymore but a new anxiety replaced it. Now someone knew I was in love with Jane. "I'm sorry Angela."
"Does she know?" Angela's voice was quiet but caring.
"No." Rubbing my temple, I continued. "It's better to stay that way. If she knows, things won't be the same." Letting out a heavy sigh, I remembered Jane covered in blood. "I was terrified when she was shot. I can't imagine a life without Jane in it being my best friend." My voice cracked at the thought.
"Is it such a bad thing that things would change between the two of you?"
"Yes. I told you Angela, I can't imagine my life without her. That would be a void nothing could ever fill."
"What makes you think it would be a bad change? Because that's obviously what you're thinking about."
"Angela," I sighed in defeat. "Jane is straight. If I told her how I really felt, things would be awkward between us. Eventually that would drive us apart. I can't handle that."
Xxx
My mother seriously needs to back off Maura. This line of questioning might lead to her telling Maura how I feel. And I want to be the one to tell her. But it sounds like she feels the same way. That would make the dream she had in the hospital make more sense. And the fact that she's willingly slept in my arms the past two weeks. "Maura, Jane-,"
"Kind of needs your help. The tape came off the dressing on my back." Both women jumped when I spoke.
"Oh Jane, I didn't realize you were awake. Go lay back down and I'll get new supplies."
After Maura disappeared into her bedroom, I nearly hissed at my mother. "Are you crazy? You can't tell her I'm in love with her!"
"Why not? You won't tell her. And she clearly feels the same way."
"Because it's not something you should tell." Before Ma could reply, Maura walked back in the living room.
"Shall we?" I smiled until the blonde was in front of me. Glaring at my mother, I followed Maura into the guest room.
"Thanks for fixing it. I guess I moved too quickly."
"Not a problem." Green eyes lingered a split second when I lifted my tank top to my armpits. She has always liked lace underwear. Maybe she likes it on me more. I groaned inwardly remembering when I realized the good doctor liked lace and how unbelievable jealous I was of the guy she was dating. "Alright, there you are. Just be careful."
"I will. I guess the bed is just too big that I'm not being careful not to move around." Please read between the lines. Please Maura don't take this just literally. All I got was a nod. Damn.
"I'll come to check on you once I go to bed." With that, Maura cracked my door and rejoined my mother.
For the next two hours, I played on my phone praying it wouldn't go dead. I was wide-awake and horrified that I couldn't hear what they were talking about. When I heard the front door lock and each light switched off, I plugged in my phone and acted like I was asleep. Since my back was towards the door, it was easier when Maura looked in on me. "Goodnight Jane." It took every ounce of self-control I had to not say it back.
When she left, my heart fell. Well, I guess the nights of her sleeping in my arms are done.
Xxx
Lying in my bed, I stared at the ceiling. I can't sleep. I miss Jane holding me. I wonder what Angela was going to say before Jane interrupted us. This bed is too big. It feels empty. Suddenly, Jane's words crossed my mind. Does she enjoy sleeping in the same bed as well? I lay there a few moments longer before throwing the covers back.
Peering into the room, Jane was sound asleep. Carefully, I slide in behind her. I was hesitant to wrap an arm around her because of her wound. The last thing I want is to wake her. Finally, I decided to let my hand rest on the taller woman's hip. Subconsciously, Jane snuggled into me with a content sigh.
Waking up to dark curls in my face was, actually, nice. It meant Jane was still in front of me. Once I became more aware of my surroundings, I realized my arm was atop hers and her hand was atop mine. When I tried to move, Jane's grip tightened subconsciously. Not wanting to wake her, I stayed still. "I had a weird dream when I was in the hospital." Jane's voice was quiet.
"What about?" That familiar dread filled my chest again.
"I was in an O.R. and everything was really white. Dr. Mathews and his nurses were there. I was on the table and you were standing a few feet away from the table. You were crying and there was a faint buzz in the background. I tried calling for you but you never heard me. Dr. Mathews was calling my T.O.D. and you kissed me on the forehead. And you whispered something." Jane's voice was soft. "Why are you so stiff?" Carefully, the brunette turned to face me. She made sure to keep my arm exactly where it was. "What's wrong?" I kept my eyes closed. "Maura?" Tenderly, Jane let her arm rest on my side.
We had never lain like this before. It was nice but scared me. I knew if I opened my eyes and saw hers everything would change. "Nothing."
Dark eyes burnt into me. "You'll be getting hives soon."
We were so close I could feel her breath on my lips. My heart started to pound. All I had to do was move in an inch or two and I could kiss the woman I was in love with. "Jane, I-"
"Jane? Maura? I'm here to cook breakfast."
Jumping back, I was finally out of Jane's hold, her physical one. "Your mother is here."
Jane watched me from the bed. There was a penetrating look in her dark eyes that I couldn't escape. "Yes, I know that." Before I had the chance to exit the room, Jane's arms wrapped around my waist. "We'll finish talking later." I tried not to shiver as her breath caressed my ear.
Xxx
There was tension between Maura and me the entire day. I knew what it was from but we couldn't talk about it when there was the threat of someone walking in. Like my mother had this morning. While Maura went for a run, I went to the Dirty Robber for lunch. "So, I see Maura is letting you eat your normal diet again." Frost grinned as he popped a fry into his mouth.
"She's let me eat normally for a while now." Dear lord this BBQ bacon cheeseburger is amazing.
"Says the woman who just inhaled half a cheeseburger in seven minutes." Vince laughed. "I'm glad you're doing better Jane. We've missed you at the station."
"I've missed being there. Does everyone hate me for sealing Maura away and replacing her with Pike yet?" Both detectives groaned. "I'll take that as a yes."
"I'm glad she's forcing you to get rest but there's only so long you can deal with him. He's such a pain in the ass." Vince and I laughed. Frost only curses when he's passionate.
"Wow, that bad huh? I should be back soon. Then everything will be back to normal."
"Are you sure you want things to be back to normal?" Vince studied me.
"What do you mean by that? Of course I want to be back at work." Vince is a great detective. I'm sure he's picked up on something different.
"It's just, once things go back to normal, you won't be staying at Maura's. And, from what Angela has said, the two of you are pretty dead set in routines now."
Frost chimed in. "It's love."
"Shut up, Frost." My voice was nearly a hiss.
"I was kidding Jane." His eyes narrowed. "Do you love her?"
"Of course I do. She's my best friend." Vince and Frost shared a glance before looking at me again. "What?"
Clearing his throat, Vince became serious. "It's okay Jane. Everyone already knows. We're just glad the two of you are finally together."
"Togeth-what? No we're not together." My defenses skyrocketed. Before either detective could reply, the door opened. "Maura, I swear I'm drinking water. It's not as bad as it looks." My smile caused the doctor to shake her head.
"Vince, Agent Frost, how are you?" Maura came to sit beside me at the table.
"We're good." They spoke in unison.
"What's going on here?" Maura's attention turned from them to me. "Is everything alright?"
"Oh look at the time. We need to get back to the station." In a matter of seconds, Vince and Frost were out the door.
"What just happened?" Maura's brow creased.
"I have no idea."
That night Maura slept in her own bedroom. I tried to be careful as I tossed and turned. If mom wouldn't have interrupted us this morning, I could have told Maura how I felt. Is it so obvious that Vince and Frost even see it? What am I supposed to do? I can't very well go in there and say: Maura I'm in love with you and I think you're in love with me too. Hearing a light flip on, I heard Maura open a cabinet.
Getting up quietly, I walked into the living room. "Can't sleep either?" Maura jumped at my presence. "Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
"It's okay Jane. And yes, I can't sleep." After pouring herself a glass of wine, she brought down another glass. You're no longer on narcotics, so you can have a glass if you'd like."
"Thanks." Taking the offered glass, I sipped the red liquid. "Couch?" With a nod, the shorter woman followed. Getting comfortable, I had to break the awkward silence. "Maura, there's something I need to tell you." I've never been so scared in my whole life. What I'm about to say could ruin everything.
"What is it, Jane?" Maura's voice was light. "And there's something I need to tell you as well."
"Do you want to go first?" A nervous laugh bubbled up my throat.
"No, I don't want to be rude."
"Of course you don't." I tried to find my voice but nothing came for a few minutes. "Maura, I…"
Scooting closer, the blonde took my hand in hers. "What is it, Jane?"
Closing my eyes, I just said it. "I love you. And it's not just in a best friend way." I braced myself for a fatal blow. When it never came, I met Maura's gaze. "Maura?"
xxx
Finally, I heard the words I have longed to hear for years. "I love you too, Jane." Satin brown eyes looked into my soul. "In the same way."
"Really?"
"And why I let you hold me all those nights. You know I don't care to be hugged or held." Cupping Jane's face in my hands, I met her gaze. "I want to be with you, Jane. I was just scared of what might happen if I told you how I felt."
Placing a hand upon mine, Jane held it in place as she kissed my palm. "We're in the same boat then." She was about to continue when our phones both buzzed. Leaning over to grab mine, I swiped to open a text from Angela.
It's about time the two of you tell each other. Love you guys!
"Your mother is stalking us." Turning the phone, I allowed Jane to read the text.
"I can't believe…Ma go back to the guest house!" Soon our phones buzzed more; a text from Frankie, Frost, and Vince saying congratulations.
"Well, it seems we don't get the pleasure of telling everyone about us. Your mother already has."
"Ma!"
I couldn't help the laugh that bubbled up my throat at Jane's reaction. Leaning forward, I cupped the woman's face and kissed her softly. At first, Jane was timid. But she quickly became more passionate. "Let's take this somewhere more private."