"Oh, oh, oh Claaaudeee."

Alois was a sobbing mess on his hands and knees. His face was a blur of red and snot and tears. Words dribbled out of him like saliva, just a constant, wet repeat of his butler's name.

Claude was lying, face down, in the chip pan. His body was slumped, lifeless. And he had a huge sword jammed into his back.

He was dead. He was definitely dead.

"You said you'd never leave me," Alois said without a drop of anger. Another loud howl spewed out of him, the wail merging into a fit of coughing. This wasn't right, this wasn't right, this wasn't right and it was all her fault.

And there she was, there she fucking was. Standing at the door like a helpless little fairy, with her delicate little hands clasped as if she was a fucking child. She even gasped. Who knew, who knew that her pathetic, housebroken demeanor was all an act?

"You, it's you…" Alois hissed through a glut of phlegm. He slowly rose to his feet, legs shaking as he stared at her.

"Master… What ha-"

"SHUT UP," he shouted. "Just shut up, just shUT UP." He walked forwards, speeding into a run as he approached her and grabbed her by her stupid hair. Digging his nails as deeply as he could into her scalp, he wished he could stab right through her skull and right into that dumb little treacherous brain of hers. "Get out, get out, get out and don't look at him."

She was squealing. Struggling, even. "You think you don't deserve this punishment, hmm?" He felt sick all over, sick, sick, sick. He was alone. He was always going to be alone. Even Claude, even Claude had betrayed him by letting himself get stabbed in the back. What an idiot! If only he could see the look on his own greasy face! "What, what do you want me to praise you, think you did well for saving me or whatever stupid little game is going through your head?"

"Master, Luka wo…"

"NO, FUCK OFF." He slammed a boot into her gut. Again. A couple more times. She still whined and gargled and complained making all that pathetic, pathetic noise. "You don't get to see Claude and you don't get to say his name. No one has that right! No one!"

He slammed her head into a door, threw her into a vase, chucked her basically anywhere. But no matter how many little cuts she got. No matter how much her forehead drenched her in blood. No matter what he did she was still making all those dumb noises and was still better off than Claude. He should have gone back. He should have ripped the demon sword out of his back and corkscrewed it right into her fucking eye.

Wrenching the door open to the front of the mansion, he finally threw her out.

"Go on, go on, just go."

Hannah looked back, remorsefully, almost. "Master, I …"

"And take your stupid gingers with you," he yelled, before slamming the door shut.

Leaning against it, he collapsed to the floor. Crawling, and slipping, and eventually walking - he made his way back to the kitchen and back to Claude.

There's no one else, now.

The woods were full of singing things and dust.

Skipping, Alois noticed how small the trees looked, now. Spider webs wrapped around his fingers, thick and soft and fuzzy and gross. Morning light shivered through the woods, dew reflecting the soft orange light. A blazing circle met his face, a spider web so thick with dew that it felt wet and horrible on his skin.

"Hoheo Taralna, Rondero Tarel."

Claude would remember that song. It was his song. This was all his.

"Hoheo Taralna, Rondero Tarel."

His body was starting to stink, and not just of grease. The wound in his back was festering.

"Hoheo Taralna, Rondero Tarel."

It was time to come back. He'd had his break. Now it was time to come back and clean up that fucking kitchen.

…

"Hoheo Taralna, Rondero Tarel."

It wasn't going to work. He knew it wasn't. He knew this was stupid and that Claude was dead and always would be dead and that he probably deserved to be dead but…

"Hoheo Taralna, Rondero Tarel."

Suddenly, the woods filled with a bright, impossible light. The smell of alcohol burned in his throat, and he gasped, suffocating. He felt a hand on his shoulder, words awakening in his ears.

"Alois! I'm sorry what happened to Claude, but I'm gonna be yer new butler now," said a short, plump man with too much body hair.

"Who the fuck are you?"

"I'm Frank. Frank Reynolds."