This story is based on the song 'I'm Too Sexy' by Right Said Fred. Put down any drink thou art drinking, for thee shall soon spit it out of thy mouth. I don't own Mortal Instruments, or I'm too Sexy.

Jace strutted down the street, followed by a train of teenage wannabe girls whispering to their friends and giggled when he put jaunt into his step.

"I love you, Jace! Marry me! EEEEE!"

He turned his head while continuing to walk down the road, "I'm too sexy for my love."

Girls pop everywhere as he trailed down Broadway, taking fans from different fandoms.

"O.M.G! It's Jace Wayland!"

"Jace Lightwood, idiot!"

"Ah! Don't spoil the third book for me!"

"Are he and Clary's siblings?"

"When does Fallen Angels come out?"

Jace ignored them and continued to walk down the stairs to take the subway towards the Institute.

"Take off your shirt, Jace! We want to see your abs!"

"I'm too sexy for my shirt…"

"Ahh! He's taking off his shirt!"

Jace gave a satisfied look as he threw his shirt behind him into the brigade of following teenage girls (and gay boys) who squealed and fought for this piece of his beauty.

"Jace! There's a retro party tonight at the Fat Black Pussycat! Come with me?" a girl asked hopefully, squeezing his muscles, which rippled under her touch.

"I'm too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party… No way I'm disco dancing!"

The girl gasped, and swooned before fainting into her friend's arms.

"So… sexy," she managed to let out.

"Ohmigod, you whores," yelled a raven-haired beauty, "He has a girlfriend. Read the third book!"

"Ah! Spoilers!"

"I'm going to cut you, bitch!"

Jace started a war between the girls that attacked each other, and continued to stroll down the street.

A girl ran up behind Jace and held out keys to a Lamborghini, and Jace raised his brows.

"Jace! I bought you a car! You're always taking the subway! Here!" she dropped the keys in his hand, and scurried away, giggling with her friends.

"I'm too sexy for my car, too sexy for my car, by far…" He threw the keys behind him into the pit of swarming fans.

"He touched it!"

"Oh my god!"

Jace finally reached the entrance of the Institute, where Church was meowing expectantly. Jace picked him up and turned to face the group of girls. They all gaped and went silent.

"I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat… " He stroked Church and winked at a blonde girl before touching the chin of a pretty brunette girl beside him that promptly fainted.

"Poor pussy; poor pussy cat."

Review if you got the perverted joke.