Title: Happy Golden Days of Yore
Rating: PG-13? Same as the show, I guess.
Summary: Christmas morning with Ned and Chuck. Set after season two.
Author's Note: Egads another new fandom! Unbeta'd, short, and very twee. Consider yourself warned. If it seems out of season, it isn't. (For me anyway. But my family celebrates Christmas early - before my grandparents leave for Arizona every winter.)

…..

We pause in our not ending/not beginning to bring you a small tale that could be described, if this were a television show, as a Christmas Special. The sappy kind, that are so saccharine sweet that the viewer might be in danger of getting a cavity. But if it is a sweet tooth you wish to sate, you have come to the right place.

For Ned the Piemaker and his childhood sweetheart, the girl called Chuck, are nestled in their bed, cuddled together. It has been two years, two months, twenty-three days, nineteen hours, and fifty-four minutes since Ned has last touched her, and since Ned brought Chuck back to life.

"It's strange that a month ago, we were baking our fingers off. And now, almost nothing."

"Mmmmjust be happy we can have few days off," Ned the Piemaker mumbled, clutching her a bit tighter.

It was 9:36, and both had reveled in the extra sleep. The girl called Chuck smiled into her pillow and cuddled closer to her sweetheart. Well, closer to the plastic sheet that separated them. Still, she could feel heat radiating from him into her through the plastic and her flannel pajamas, and thought that waking up on Christmas morning had never been more delicious. She did not celebrate Christmas in her past life, but as Ned had celebrated Chanukah with her, she was more than happy to celebrate Christmas with him.

Their holidays were busy ones, but they were together, and they could wear gloves and hold hands, so all was well.

Today was a day for everyone. Lily and Vivian, Olive and Randy, Maurice and Ralston, Emerson Cod, daughter Penny, and girlfriend Simone would all be arriving at the Pie Hole to celebrate Christmas as a loving, if often unconventional, family.

But first, the girl had a present for the boy.

"I have a present for you," she said.

"But I don't need a present, I have you."

"Yeah, but you can't open me."

"I can if I wear gloves and you tied yourself up in ribbons," he pointed out, contemplating briefly how delightful that would actually be.

She chuckled. "Well it's not that kind of a present."

"Very well. But let's make coffee first."

They ended up making hot chocolate instead. Once settled in under blankets and gloves (for hand holding) and plastic wrap (for kissing), the girl called Chuck passed a very small box to Ned.

He smiled at her as he took the box, and a thrill went through each of them.

As Ned carefully unwrapped the bow, Chuck's mind spiraled to thoughts of intimacy. It was as varied as the shared heat between them (that made its way through layers of clothing), to watching the other brush their teeth, to cups of cocoa on Christmas morning.

Lily had explained the facts of life to Charlotte when she reached that awkward, delicate age of puberty, but it had been Vivian who had taken the young lady aside and explained that it was the tiny things between two people that made sex intimate. And even if those two could not touch, and therefore had a limiting sex life, every single moment between the two of them could be nothing less than revealing. They were affectionate, buddy-buddy, cherished,chummy, close, clubby, comfy, confidants, confidential,cozy, dear, dearest, faithful, fast, fond, loving,mellow, near, nice, regular,roommates, snug, warm... Chuck had been studying her thesaurus. But intimates was by far the best word.

And intimate was the gift that he was unwrapping now. She watched as his careful fingers slowly unwrapped the tiny box. Chuck was nearly bouncing with excitement, even Digby seemed to be watching with interest as he gnawed on a new Christmas bone.

Ned lifted the lid of the box and peered in. Gently, he lifted out what looked like a dark, slim chain.

"I'm sorry, but what..."

"It's hair. My hair. It's a fob, for a watch. I thought we could get you a fob watch like mine, and then you could attach it to this, and have... my hair. Is it too weird? It was Vivian's idea-" she rambled.

Ned's fingers slowly ran down the length of the chain that Chuck had so carefully plaited.

"It's so soft," he marveled.

"Yeah. I just thought..."

"I like how you think."

She smiled. "I was worried you would think it was too weird. It's a Victorian thing - they were obsessed with death, and would keep all kinds of hair jewelry. But collecting hair goes back all through human history. There are loads of churches in Europe that are said to have the hair or fingernails of saints."

"Reliquaries."

"Exactly. I wanted you to have something of me you could, you know. Hold."

"Can I kiss you now?"

With grace born of practice, she ripped off a new sheet of plastic wrap and they dove into another intimate act.