this world...is truly rotten
light grieved as he held his beloved shiori in his trembling arms. he stared at her caved in face and began shedding wild tears down his peachy cheeks.
why...why must it happen, what's wrong with everything light sighed, he could no longer control what he was saying or thinking, he just wanted his shiori back.
he was filled to the top with cold hearted rage, glaring at the old woman who had fucked up his girlfriends face. the old lady gave a crooked, diabolical smile as she massaged her fist, she was ready for another clobbering. and this time, she wanted light. the elderly being cracked her neck and began waving her fist manically.
are you ready for another leopard smash, young lad she cackled in a mocking tone of voice.
light dropped his girlfriend, smashing her skull. the contents of her head had leaked out all over the tarmac. light had become a raging mad ape, there was no chance in saving his girlfriend now, she had died. and people die when they are dead. black liquid poured out his eye sockets and his forehead began sweating foetuses from mankinds' cruel past.
he revealed a cannon on his firm stomach, he took aim at the old woman and fired. the blast was so huge that it replayed the holocaust and 9/11 backwards in slow motion. the recoil was causing light the scream in unbelievable pain, no orgasm could be greater than the one he was receiving.
ohhhh mama he squealed, clenching his nipples like a short sighted goose.
the cannon fire ceased. all was quiet. light panted as he had just had the greatest kama sutragasm. he smiled reluctantly and gave a thumbs up to his crippled, dead girlfriend who was now a pile of stinking ashes. he shed the last tear and headed home.
light locked himself in his room, he couldn't get over the fact that shiori had died. he curled up into a ball and started sobbing his sorrows all over his tatty pillow case. ryuk had appeared through his bookcase and witnessed his best friend in depression.
raito? what's wrong ol' buddy? ryuk said calmly
its shiori...her face was pummelled..i..i still could of saved her but.... light paused, lightly sobbing. i was too careless..i dropped her and she broke..she's dead ryuk he sniffed.
oh raito... sighed ryuk ..im sorry
light shook his head and wiped away the tears from his eyes.
its okay ryuk, i mean, at least ive got you.. he said, his face red with embarrassment.
ryuks' mouth fell open, he has always secretly liked light, but he never had the right time to tell him. while ryuk was still in shock, light walked over to him like a saucy grandfather clock and touched ryuks face gently with both of his hands, caressing his bony face.
ryuk... light said with an aroused smile
light stuck his tounge in ryuks' mouth, churning it like a wet salmon in a washing machine. ryuk began playing along and flexed his tounge muscles. it was an orchestra of slurping and suggestive moans. they both fell onto the floor, almost out of control. the hot passionate kiss kept going.
i think its time ryuk light panted
light slipped his hand down ryuks cold chest and made his way to his skeletal crotch.
huh... light said with a sudden shocked expression, he almost began crying as he struggled to find a genitalia.
raito! let me explain! i- ryuk was interrupted by the slamming of the bedroom door, light had ran out. never to be seen again..
the moral of the tale is don't buy cheap cup noodles if they're not prawn flavour, or else you may end up like poor crotchless ryuk. then nobody will want to be intimate with you.