A\N: My random musings...let me know how it is? Please? Thank you! :)
It was called the Motel at the End of the Earth.
It was a shiny metal building. A tall tower, a circle atop it with bedrooms. A small half-trailer, the kind that made you think of a 50's diner, beside it. An odd combination--the ugly trailer and somewhat dazzling tower.
As she pulled up, Jean Grey was more interested in the desert. The endless robe of brush lay under the full moon, silvery-blue coating everything. It stretched out endlessly, and her road lay along it.
Her road into infinity.
She stopped the truck, staring helplessly at the Motel. She'd never seen such a thing. That in itself made it above suspicion. In the desert, the unusual was the everyday. Even mutants were tolerated. But she leaned her head against the steering wheel, sighing.
She didn't know why she'd bothered to stop, because the question she'd been asking had never been answered before. She didn't know what the point of living was.
She unbuckled her seatbelt, getting out. Well, tonight she'd give the world one more try. One more chance to tell her. If it didn't answer by morning, she was leaving. She didn't know what she expected to find in the desert, honestly, had only a vague idea of outer space and aliens somewhere within its grasp. Probably a premonition, although she couldn't imagine what in the world outer space signified.
Scott...something terrible is about to happen...
She laughed at herself. Premonitions...always right, always incomprehensible.
She took a deep breath and pushed the door in.
The clerk looked up in surprise. A young girl, hardly thirteen, Jean thought. She took pity on her, carefully altering her stance and softening her tone so she wouldn't startle the child. "I need a room. One night."
"Um...name?" The girl pushed a paper at her. "Sorry...I just...I'm not used to customers who just show up."
"I'd think you would be." Jean said, writing her name and handing the paper back.
"No. Not, uh, unless they're nutjobs. And you don't look like one." The girl handed Jean a key. "Room 210. There's an elevator there."
Jean smiled. "Thank you."
The girl suddenly called, "Hey!"
Jean turned.
"Welcome to the Motel at the End of the Earth."
Jean's smile became more genuine. "Again...thanks."
The elevator was as metallic as anything else. There were silly alien decals, and Jean shook her head. There didn't need to be--this place screamed of outer space, of worlds no human knew or understood. Maybe that was where her premonition came from.
The psychic stepped into a circle of doors. She walked over to her room, unlocking the door.
One wall was a window. Heavy, giant curtains lay on either side, waiting to be pulled for privacy. A bed was opposite it, a TV in one corner and a table opposite it. A bathroom was on the left side. Jean smiled. Sparse, showcasing the deserted wasteland outside and the stars waiting for her. She liked it.
She tossed her bag on the floor, standing in front of the window. So. She was here. Now what? Was she supposed to do something, meet someone, think on her own? It all felt so unreal...
She sighed and lay on the bed. For now, she could enjoy the view and bed. Who knew what tomorrow would bring, what the next moment would bring? Live for the moment, Jean, she told herself, let yourself float in reality.
She yawned. Soul-searching took it out of a girl. But she was far too energetic to sleep. She frowned. Was there a pool here, an exercise room? It wouldn't be the Danger Room, but she could at least work off some of this energy.
She heard a knock on her door.
Jean stood and walked to it. Probably the maid. She hadn't seen a Do Not Disturb sign, so she hadn't hung one outside the door. She opened it a crack.
Logan stared back at her.
"Jean." How was it possible to put so much feeling into one word?
"Logan..." Jean's whisper was just as bad, just as broken. The first true word she'd spoken in weeks. Suddenly she stepped aside. Not for anything would she push Logan away.
Logan stepped into the room and dropped his bag next to hers, admiring the veiw. "Wow. You sure know how to pick 'em." He smiled at her. "What, I don't get a smile back?"
"Not this time." Jean said.
"Jeannie...what're you doing?" Logan asked softly, drawing her into his arms. "The Professor said--"
"I don't care what he said." Jean's words were harsh. "He wants to kill me. He's getting what he wanted, that's all." Jean smiled and rested her head against Logan's shoulder. "He should have gotten it at Alkali Lake."
"Why?"
Jean looked up. It was a question filled with need, with pain. "Everyone I love has been taken from me." Logan said hoarsly. "Everyone. Why you, too?"
"You don't want to know, Logan." Jean whispered. "Please don't ask."
"I am asking." Logan said.
Jean sighed and walked away, staring out the window while she tried desperatly to arrange the words. "When I got my power," She started slowly, "I was a brat. It would have driven me insane, being able to do what I could. So Charles locked it off. He thought I could use it when I was older, but it started thinking for itself. It became Phoenix." Jean shut her eyes in pain, but she could still see the starlit desert outside, the empty void waiting to be traversed. "She's a murdering bitch, Logan. She wanted to kill Scott when I found him with Emma. And she wants you."
Logan stepped over to her.
"If I let her," Jean continued, struggling to keep the emotion from her voice, "She'll kill everyone and everything I love. So I'm getting rid of her first. Before she can hurt any of you. You...you shouldn't die..." She breathed slowly, forcing the tears back, "Because Scott fell in love with another woman."
Jean shut her eyes. Logan would leave. He would walk out, write her off as one more lost soul, and the Hotel at the End of the Earth would be the last any of her teammates would hear from her. She would die. She knew Logan would leave--Scott hadn't loved her enough to stay. Why would this player even bother?
Logan stood beside her, gazing at the endless void with her. "I murdered a girl with my bare hands." He confessed. "I was so high on pain and rage that I didn't realize what was going on. I let Wolverine take over. I was a killer." He glanced at the woman beside him. "But when I faced Stryker...I could have torn him apart. I could have been Wolverine again." He looked out at the desert again. "But I realized that I am Wolverine. And if I want, I can be better."
Jean turned her face to him, and for one second, Logan could see the broken, ravaged soul within. "I don't know how." She whispered. "I don't know how to live anymore."
Logan took her hand in his. "You just wait." He whispered. "Life shows you how to live. You just give it time to do that." He carefully took her into his arms again. "And if you want, Beautiful...I'll be there with you all the way."
"I'll hurt you." Jean protested. "I hurt Scott. I'll hurt you, too."
"No, sweetie." Logan whispered. "Scott hurt you."
Their lips met.
It was salvation and damnation clashing in one desperate, final battle. It was hate and ferocious joy waiting for Jean, a choice she had wrestled with since seeing Scott and Frost together, since hearing Scott say it was her own fault for being so unfaithful and constantly talking to Logan, since Logan had come to save her.
Jean didn't care.
The two made their way over to the bed, gasping and touching and delighting in each other. Jean almost screamed as Logan slid his mouth over her body, moaning in pleasure.
The Phoenix was pleased.
Jean found herself, suddenly, atop Logan, staring down at him with wild joy. No. No, she would hurt him, she couldn't fall in love or she would tear him apart.
If I want, I can be better.
Jean's lips touched Logan's gently, a sweet caress that made Logan moan.
The next morning, they went home.
TEN YEARS LATER
Jean yawned as she stumbled out of bed. She desperately needed coffee. Hopefully Jessie hadn't gotten at the coffemaker again.
"Happy anniversary, Mom!"
Jean took the tray from her daughter, smiling. "Thanks, sweetie. You didn't let Jamie cook this, did you?"
"Nah, Daddy did. Anyway, gonna be late for training, see ya!"
Jean laughed as her daughter bounded outside. She was blessed--a wonderful husband, two beautiful children, and a fun, if somewhat insane, life. She slid in front of her computer. It was time to look up that hotel again, definitely.
She smiled as she typed the words in: Motel at the End of the Earth. Wouldn't Logan like to see the place where she had conquered the demons in her head, the place where they had first made love? It would be romantic to go there again...
She blinked at the screen.
No matches found. Retry query?
She sat back.
Somewhere, she could swear she heard the Phoenix laughing.