Disclaimer: All Twilight characters mentioned belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Summary: A girl wins a contest to be on the New Moon set were she meets Edward and learns the secret behind Bella's existence.

I Never Win

- Chapter One -

I rolled over on my side and gazed out my window. I could barely see outside. The windows were frosted white. I could feel the cold air breathing down on my cheek. I double-checked to make sure the window was completely shut. Then I snuggled back in bed, pulling the blanket up over my face. I laid there staring at the ceiling until my eye lids got droopy again. I hated waking up in the middle of the night.

It was March 23rd and the morning sun crept on my face like a spider. Another thing I hated the sun. I was already looking forward to the day ending. I had a good reason to. Midnight was the official DVD release of "Twilight."

As I rolled out of bed I walked to my vanity mirror. I guess I was vain, but that's because I never thought I was beautiful. My hair was a mess like someone raked it with a comb in all different directions. I could already see my dark brown roots growing back. Although, it wasn't noticeable when my short blonde hair was straightened and styled nicely. I examined my pale skin and then looked back at the pair of hazel eyes with a tint of gold beaming back at me. "Time for a shower," I thought to myself. I grabbed a towel and started the water.

After getting ready and eating breakfast I decided to log online to check out which stores were having a DVD release party. I typed in "Twilight" and clicked the link that brought me straight to the official movie website. "New Moon Contest" was the first thing that my eyes caught. The description read that participants had to submit a one-minute video explaining why they should be chosen. The winner would then be flown to Vancouver, Canada and possibly be an extra in the New Moon movie. I almost jumped around in enthusiasm, until I reached the entry deadline "March 24th," which indicated that I only had a few hours to self direct my award winning entry. I frowned immediately and sulked for a bit. How was I going to do this? With only a few seconds of disappointment I thought to myself, "I can do this!" I scrapped around for a piece of paper and reached for the first writing instrument I could find, a sharpie.

I sat on the floor and thought about the goofiest skits/scenes I could incorporate into my video. As soon as I finished it I had a quick sketch of stick figures. All my ideas were parodies from the "Twilight" movie.

I went into my closet to dress up for my first scene. I found a pair of blue skinny jeans and a pink and black plaid shirt. I put my plaid shirt over my grey baseball tee with black sleeves. Then I slipped on my black flats. I went to the mirror to grab my pink elastic headband. Before I slipped it over my blonde hair, I took time to straighten it out. I wanted to look my best. Then I headed out the door with my black purse and shades on. I walked along the sidewalk to the parking lot to film my first scene. It wasn't long. I just pretended to get hit by a car and saved just like Bella in "Twilight." Another wardrobe change and I was ready for my second scene.

I slipped off my plaid shirt and put on a grey jacket that came up to my ribs. Then I changed my shoes into my favorite grey heels and headed towards the kitchen. I looked around for the first fruit I could find and grabbed a banana. This was the part of the "Twilight" movie where Edward kicks up an apple and it lands perfectly in his had, a perfect carbon copy of the book's front cover. I did the exact same thing, only I used a banana and dropped it onto my foot a couple of times. I would edit it in the video to magically bounce back up into my hand. It took about two bananas to film this shot. The first banana could only withstand three to four droppings before the skin started to split. The second banana only took one or two shots before I got the right shot, it didn't suffer too much damage.

After playing hacky sac with bananas I headed back into my room to change again. I took off my grey jacket, heels, and jeans. I left my baseball tee on and slipped on some grey leggings. Then I searched through my clothes for my black knee high stockings, which I pulled over my leggings. I slipped on my aged converse shoes with drawings on the white tipped part and then finished my look with a black hat. I definitely looked like a baseball player now. I walked into the living room and turned on the television to set up the shot. Then I grabbed my Wii remote and started to swing. This was my version of the baseball scene from the movie. I edited it later with "Supermassive Black Hole" playing in the background.

That was it for all my major scenes to be incorporated into my one-minute entry. I filmed shorter scenes later, which were the introduction and the ending. All I stated in the introduction was that my name was Scarlet and that I was 21 years old. Then the reason I gave for why I should be picked was because I related to Bella and all the parodied scenes showed why. With my closing I just thanked the viewer(s) for watching and waved like an excited fan to be recognized.

After an hour or two of struggling to edit my clips together and adding music and text, I was finished with my movie. I then revisited the website to submit my entry. The moment the page loaded I clicked enter and began filling out the long ass questionnaire of personal information. Once that was finished it brought me to the page I could upload my video. I immediately clicked upload and selected my video. Then the upload status bar appeared. My heart started to pound as I looked at the time 11:00 PM. My heart then calmed down. I had about an hour to upload my video. Then I looked back at the status bar 1% and five minutes of staring at it hoping my gaze would hasten it, it moved to 3%, at this rate it would take all night to upload. It was like the cable company knew I was uploading my video at this very second and decided to play a joke on me and gave me back age-old dial up speed. I was impatient and worried. This video needed to make it! If it didn't make the deadline, I would be disqualified. I bit my lip and took a deep breath. I was going to make it I reassured myself. I was too afraid to even lay a finger on my laptop because some horrible catastrophe might occur. So I put my hands in my lap and started to play with my rings. After a while, I looked back at the clock and it was 11:15 PM and the status bar read 5%. I was going to take a shit. I walked away from the computer and decided not to look at it. I laid it in the hands of faith and headed right to the refrigerator.

I opened up the freezer and pulled out an ice cream sandwich. I peeled off the wrapper and stuck the sandwich in my mouth. Then I sat on the couch and nibbled the rest down. My fingers were covered in chocolate, I decided I wasn't in the mood to lick it off and savor each taste of my ice cream. I got up slowly and made my agonizing walk back to my room and washed my hands in the sink. I let the water drip from my fingertips and then dried my hands with the crimson towel hanging over the curtain rod. This was it. I burned a couple of minutes for it to be past 11:20 PM. I walked back to my laptop unsure whether I was going to scream at the top of my lungs or jump around like a bunny. I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath. The moment I opened my eyes I saw that it was 80% complete. Then in five more minutes it sped up like lightening. "Your entry has been submitted!" I let out a scream of excitement and then quickly navigated away to find locations for the midnight DVD release.

I found a location nearby the movie theaters. It was Barnes and Noble. I headed outside to jump in the car with my friend and one of my roomates Jeffrey. He had a Ford Explorer that was falling apart. The front bumper was duck taped on and so was the right side view mirror. His doors had problems unlocking so I had to wait for him to unlock the passenger door. The moment I climbed inside he groaned. The car battery was dead! It didn't take long to realize how this happened. It was earlier when we were filming the scene for my movie, the part where I get hit by the car. He forgot to turn off the lights to his car after we finished. It was my fault! If I didn't film that scene then the car wouldn't have died. "I'm sorry," I said to him. "It's okay, I'm going to see who has jumper cables," he replied quickly. He pulled out the key and walked back to the apartment.

After a while of waiting in the car he found someone who carried jumper cables in their car. A few friends had come over when we had decided to head on out. His friend Steve was prepared for every disaster imaginable. He came out and dashed away to go get his car; meanwhile, Jeffrey slowly backed out his car in the roadway of the parking lot. He got the car going and started pushing it with his body parking it perfectly for Steve to park in front of his car. It took a couple of minutes for Steve to get his car. He parked far away near the main office of the apartment complex. All guest parking spots were taken except there. He whisked around the corner with his white Toyota Yaris, it looked like a shiny white egg and parked it inches away from the dusty Ford. Jeffery then popped open his hood and made me hold it up, since he didn't have anything to hold it open with. Steve left his car on and then went to his trunk to get the jumper cables. He then popped out with an alien mask on. "What the fuck?!" I said laughing at his mask. Jeffery laughed along with me. "I just carry it with me at all times," Steve said pulling off the mask and opening his hood. He then instructed Jeffery to place the cables on the batteries and the two cars were hooked. Steve went to his car to give it some gas and bring poor Jeffery's Ford back to life. Vroom Vrrrooom his little car roared and then Jeffery's car started to ding that the car was alive and that the door was open. "Thank you Steve so much!" I rejoiced and jumped in the car and waited as Jeffery thanked him and joined me. Now we were off to the store!

It didn't take long to arrive there. I was excited to finally make it. I didn't think we'd get so lucky with the whole jumper cable ordeal. I thought maybe we would have had to go to the store and purchase one. As Jeffery parked the car, I unfastened my seat belt and was ready to dash out of the car. We walked together in the cold weather, which I was dressed poorly for, towards Barnes and Noble. I expected a line of screaming girls or fans in "Team Edward" or "Team Jacob" tees. However, there wasn't anybody around just two old ladies and a young boy parading around like he was conducting a circus line behind him. I could hear the old ladies talk in Spanish as we arrived to check the door to the store. It was locked and we still had 10 minutes to wait. I could do that, I thought and stood around with my friend.

I easily got tired of standing and fighting the wind, which came out of nowhere. I decided to find a place to sit down and a place that would block the wind from hitting my body. I peered around and picked the huge staircase leading down to the main ground. I had no other choice since the old ladies occupied the only bench near by. I walked over and sat right down on six or so stair steps up closest to the ground. The moment I put my ass down I felt the cold cement kiss it. At least I wasn't being blown away because there was a huge wall to my right.

There was now five minutes left till midnight and a huge lady with dark blonde hair started walking to the main entrance, but then she stopped and started to talk to her co-workers. She eventually walked away. What a tease. Making us think she was going to open the door early for us. The little boy that was roaming around was now glued to the glass doors. He had his face and hands pressed up against the glass like a suction cup toy you stick on your car. I laughed and I thought I was impatient.

Finally, as the clock ticked away it read 11: 57 PM. I got up with Jeffery and walked to the entrance. A couple more people arrived. One was a man in his thirty's in a black suit, another a petite lady in her late twenty's with a lavender dress and black coat, and then two girls that looked highly obsessed with Twilight. Those three minutes couldn't have been any longer. As the two girls arrived they giggled and said to us, "Wow we don't feel so lame anymore," and then giggled like chipmunks. They continued on, but I didn't pay much attention. I was watching the lady in the lavender dress stand alone, until the dressed up suited man walked up to her. I could hear him trying to converse with her and her face turned into Jasper's face. She looked like she was in pain, begging for someone to save her. She looked too nice to turn away and ignore him. He sounded like a generic cheesy man. Then my eyes wandered to the entrance. Hallelujah! The doors were going to be opened and the little boy obviously made it first in line, followed by the slow old ladies, next was the chipper teens no older than sixteen or seventeen, afterwards was Jeffery and I, and then the poor lady being hovered by the suited man.

I watched the two old ladies pay for two copies of the "Twilight" DVD, while listening to the suited man exchanging business cards with the lavender lady. Then it was the two chipper girls who both purchased a DVD. They then asked if they could get a cover for their DVDs and the longhaired man behind the desk pointed to the entrance, which had black cardboard bookshelves holding rows of DVD covers for display. I then noticed the lavender lady walk out of the store. I think the suited man had scared her off. It was now our turn and Jeffery was going to pay for my DVD. He owed me a birthday gift from February. The man behind the counter asked us before he paid, "Do you have a Barnes and Nobles card to get an additional discount?" I replied, "No, do you? You could give us a discount" I smiled. He laughed and said, "Sorry my manager is right there watching." I pouted and then he gave us our DVD as Jeffery paid and then instructed us that we could pull out one of the DVD covers from the entrance to keep.

I was really happy leaving the store. I couldn't wait to watch the "Twilight" DVD for the first time on my television. I thanked Jeffery with a huge bear hug once we arrived home. The moment I got inside I got ready for bed taking all my make-up off and slipping into my comfy pajamas.

I went back to my bed were I laid the sealed DVD and slowly began to unravel it. It was like Christmas all over again. I turned on my xbox on and slipped it in. I crawled under the covers where it was cold as the air outside, it was waiting for a warm body to fill it and once I was settled in I hit play. I didn't even make it twenty minutes into the movie before I fell fast asleep.

More than two weeks had passed by and I was starting to get worried. I didn't hear any word from the website if I had made it as a finalist. There were supposed to be about ten finalists and those who had been chosen were supposed to receive some sort of notification. I started to give up my hopes. Maybe my video wasn't good enough, sincere enough, crazy enough, funny enough, and whatever else they were looking for.

I logged online and even did a little research if any of the finalists had been announced or if anyone had received notification. When the results popped up it got me speculating. People were saying that they haven't received anything nor did they know who did. I started to think maybe Summit decided to not send notifications out and planned to just announce the winner on the 24th of April or what if they were having problems picking the winner since there were so many submissions. All these ideas started to race through my head "What if." I started to zone out at the ground not even realizing it. I flinched and suddenly shook myself out of my trance.

I decided to lie down on my bed and pick up "Breaking Dawn." I had read the other three books with ease and speed, but for some reason I was having problems with this last book. I had been stuck at the chapter where she exits the Cullen's house after the wedding reception. I guess I didn't want the saga to end. I knew deep down I would've finished the book in no time, but maybe I was afraid to find out the ending. I was a sucker for happy endings. I hated crying. I pulled out the bookmark and back tracked a couple of pages before from where I left off. I always forgot what happened previously since it had been awhile and by the time I finished back tracking I was falling asleep. I placed the bookmark back in and placed it aside for another day. This was just another reason why I never got further. I couldn't lie in a reading position very long. I just couldn't resist the pillow slowly inching towards my cheek, welcoming my head to hold it. Off I was to dreamland hoping of escaping to something wonderful.

It was Monday, April 20, 2009 and there was four days left till the winner would be announced. I was excited as hell and scared that I had no shot. It was another regular day for me and I had to go to school. I lived in Orange County and my school was located in Los Angeles. It took me about one hour to get to school (waking up at 5:30 AM in the morning) and two to come back home if I left school later than one o' clock. I was only taking one class; I dropped my other class, which was World History. The teacher that taught it was French and she was absolutely lovely besides her teaching. She went all over the board and I had just given up taking notes since it was impossible to follow. My other classes were Physiology and a laboratory class; however my last laboratory class ended last Wednesday. It was only every Wednesday from 1-4 PM, those were the days it took me two hours to get home. My Physiology class was Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from 8-9 AM. I immediately go home after lecture.

I was taking science courses because I wanted to be a nurse. I planned on doing my nursing at my college, but tuition became really expensive and the drive was suicidal. I was planning on transferring and leaving the college this semester with an AA in pre-health science, which wasn't much. And the only reason I commute so far was because I recently moved out of my dorm and relocated to wonderful Orange County.

The moment I arrived home I undressed and slipped on some comfortable clothes. I took off my hat, which I wore since I valued sleep over fixing my hair and then crashed in my bed. I seemed fatigue lately because commuting was getting to me and testing had been relentless.

The windows by my bed were open and the blinds were fluttering, driving me mad. It was too hot to close the windows and it was only 11 AM. I remember yesterday was 93 degrees. Mmmm, I could smell something baking or being heated up. It was toast or some sort of pastry. I love bread, especially when it is hot and fresh. My stomach started to growl like I wasn't feeding my tiny monster inhabitant. I did miss breakfast after all. I decided to go into the kitchen and find something filling.

I was no cook like Bella. I guess I could cook a few things, only things with directions, but nothing complicated. I could make eggs benedict, only I didn't know how to make the hollandaise sause. And stuff that didn't involve to much work like make stuffed cheese ravioli with fettuccini sauce and broccoli, which only involved boiling and heating up. I could cook to survive starvation.

I pulled out a chair and put it in front of the long cabinet by the refrigerator. This is where each roommate kept his or her food. Mine was at the very top and at 5'5' I needed the extra hoist.

I peered into my deep cubbyhole like a little kid and pulled out a packet of top ramen. It was chicken flavored. I then borrowed a piece of bread from Jeffery's cabinet.

I popped in my toast and took out a pot and filled it with water. I started the stove and waited for the water to come to a boil; meanwhile, I crushed the ramen packet against the counter. I didn't like scooping up long strings of noodles.

The piece of bread finished and jolted me when it popped out. I let it sit for a while and started to poor the ramen packet in. I opened the fridge and pulled out an egg, cracking the contents in. I sprinkled a little pepper and then got my toast while it finished cooking. After a few minutes my ramen was done. I turned off the stove and dumped out the water in the sink and slid it into my white plastic bowl. I took out the little flavoring packet and sprinkled it on. I washed my pot before I left to eat and grabbed a fork to devour my ramen.

My ramen was hot and steamy and I finished it and my piece of toast in no time. Now all the blood in my body was rushing to my stomach and I was starting to feel the exhaustion from earlier. I washed my dishes and walked back to my room to rest.

I sat straight up on my bed and turned on my laptop. I popped out my widgets and the temperature read 98 degrees and I laughed because I remembered that old ass band with Nicolas Lachey. I looked back at the date and realized that it was 420. Explains why I could smell weed floating on down from upstairs. They were daily stoners. I wonder what it would be like to watch "Twilight" high or even on shrooms. I hadn't done shrooms just weed a long time ago. I was pretty much drug free, never smoked, and only drank occasionally like at restaurants. I had heard crazy stories about shrooms. It was a hallucinogen that would make Edward appear before my eyes or James crawl out of my television like "The Ring." Fuck that. My friend told me an experience he once had. He was sitting outside on front door steps tripping out on shrooms. When his friend came to join him, but when he looked his friend in the face to talk to him he started to trip out. He said his friend's face was slowly sliding off his skull. It started to drip drop onto the ground like a leaking faucet and slowly his eyeballs followed and then his mouth still moving while it slid down. He obviously freaked out. I wouldn't blame him.

April 22

....

April 23

....

April 24

Today was the day! I was going to find out who won. I was a little on the edge like I had too much coffee. My hands didn't want to navigate to the website. And then it loaded. On the front page was a video of the winner. Immediately, from the screenshot I knew it wasn't me. I didn't know how to react. It felt like there was zero gravity for a split second and I could feel my heart falling to the pit of my stomach. I closed my laptop gently. I didn't even have good sportsmanship to watch the video. I didn't want to know how badly mine sucked. Fuck! I never win. I don't know why I was so upset. It was a silly contest. I was silly. I laughed at myself. Get over yourself. And forced a smile upon my morning face.

I dragged my lifeless body to the kitchen. I was surprised my legs still functioned. I expected to tumble right onto the floor. I pulled out my cereal box and poured it into a bowl, got out the milk and drowned it. I sat on the kitchen table with my knees up to my chest. Crunch crunch. I put spoonfuls of Golden Grams in my mouth. I took my time savoring the taste and then slurping the rest of the milk down. I put my bowl in the sink to lifeless to wash it and headed to my room for a shower.

I grabbed a new towel that was rolled up perfectly and turned on the shower. I pulled off my shirt and slipped off my pjs. I slid open the shower curtain and poked in a leg to make sure it wasn't too hot. Ah! A little too hot and I lowered it a bit. I stepped right in and then let the luke warm water shower over my body. I picked up my Shea Butter Shampoo and poured it into my hand and lathered it into my hair. I stroked my hands threw my hair and then heard a faint sound in the distance. I couldn't quite make it out and then creaked open the door. And then I heard it. It was a piano playing some familiar tune. It was my phone! Bella's lullaby! I jumped out of the shower with shampoo still in my hair and wrapped the towel hanging near by around me. I dashed out and attended my phone instantly. It was a restricted number. I picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Scarlet?"

"Yes…."

"Do you know who this is?"

His deep lovely voice sounded so familiar. It took me a second to register it.

"E-d-d-d-ward? I mean Robert!"

"Yes! That's me," he chuckled.

My mouth dropped open and I was speechless. Did I slip and hit my head in the shower?

"Hello, Scarlet are you still there?"

Stay tuned for Chapter 2! Please leave a review!