The Cold-Hearted Alchemist
Chapter 1
I watched Fullmetal Alchemist the other night and decided to write fanfic about it, so here it is!
It was eleven-thirty in the morning, and Ethan Miller was walking down a street in Central with his twin brother, Thomas.
Let me introduce these two guys. Ethan Miller was a twenty-seven-year-old man. He was lazy, shy, a perv, immature, and an idiot. His brother, on the other hand, was strong, hotheaded, and also an idiot. They were walking down a street in Central. "Where are you taking me?" asked Thomas.
"To a magical land," answered Ethan.
Thomas just stared blankly at him. "Seriously, where are we going?"
"I want to show you something."
Thomas sighed and followed his twin brother into a restaurant. "Why are we in here?"
"They have the best food here. I'm not kidding."
Thomas just stared at him. "That's seriously why you brought me here?"
They sat down at a table. "Actually, that's not the reason, but if I told you, you'd hit me."
"Oh, c-mon, I'm not going to hit you. What is it?"
A waitress with a rather big chest walked up to their table. "Can I take your order?" she asked.
Thomas glared at Ethan. Ethan smiled uncomfortably. Thomas leaned over the table and gave him a good, hard whack on the arm. Ethan yelped in pain before rubbing his bruise. "Told you you'd hit me."
"I don't have all day," the waitress said impatiently.
"I guess we can have an early lunch," Thomas said. "I'll have the ribs."
"And you?" the waitress asked as she turned to Ethan.
"A doctor," Ethan answered.
"Ok, so that's one order of ribs and a doctor," the waitress said as she wrote it down on her note pad. "It'll only be a second."
"Hurry back," Ethan wheezed.
"That's what you get for perving."
"Shut up."
After about a minute, the waitress returned with a mountain of ribs on one plate, and a doll in a doctor's costume on the other. "One stack of ribs and one doctor," the waitress said as she smiled. "Enjoy!" She walked off to another table.
"I can't believe the size of ribs they give you at this place!" Thomas exclaimed as his mouth watered at the sight of the meat.
"I can't believe she took a crummy joke this far," Ethan said as he prodded the doll with his fork. "Hey, Thoma-" Ethan stopped at the sight of his brother's empty plate filled with bones. "How did you…?"
"How did I what?" Thomas asked.
"Never mind."
After Thomas unbuttoned his pants and Ethan, out of spite, put the doll in his pocket, they headed out of the restaurant.
"I can't believe you ate a mountain of ribs in under three milliseconds!" Ethan said in amazement.
"I can't believe you didn't eat your doctor!" Thomas joked.
"Too chewy."
"I should probably get to work, though."
"What is it you do again?"
Thomas stopped, turned to face Ethan, and gave him a look like he was an idiot. "I'm in the military. I'm a Lance Corporal, remember?"
"I don't think you've ever told me this."
"I've been one for almost a year now!"
"Have you?" Ethan rubbed his chin. "I don't remember this."
They started chuckling as they started walking again. "I got to go. See you!"
"See you, Tom!" Tom began crossing the street, when he turned around and started walking backwards, waving. "Idiot."
"This just proves I'm-" Thomas stopped talking when his ribs became a part of the hood of a car.