Disclaimer: As per usual, the good things in life are not mine to have, but belong to someone else... Nevermind, they're mine in my dreams...
Authors Note: Never done this before, but was just inspired by the opening line... Only meant to be a 15 minute challenge, but I did it in 20. But I did get interrupted by the cat, so does that count? Be gentle, be kind... Flames welcome though they may dishearten... Burns heal after all...
"I can't take it anymore. You've been sending so many mixed signals I just don't know what you want from me...
"I want what I've always wanted... you"
"But how can I be sure? One minute you're merrily talking away to me as though I'm your best friend, the next, you're either ignoring me or insulting me...?"
"But..."
"But nothing, I don't know how much more of this I can take Avon..."
"Vila, my love, I'm sorry, I don't know what to say... How can I make it up to you?" Avon stared up at Vila from his seat on the edge of their bed, his chocolate brown eyes almost brimming with tears.
"There you go again... You are so highly strung these days... If you were a woman, I'd say you were pregnant... But you're not... And I just don't know what to think anymore..." Vila paced the room angrily and ran a hand through his hair. He stopped in the middle of the room and just stared at Avon.
They stared at each other for long minutes before Avon sighed and hung his head.
"I'm sorry... It's just..."
"Blake!" Vila finished Avon's sentence for him. Catching the slight blush spreading across the other's cheek, he too sighed... knowing his guess to be the truth.
"Not exactly..." Avon got off the bed and started to walk towards Vila. "It's more to do with Tarrant..." Avon stopped and sighed again, momentarily realising how much he'd been sighing this past week. "I can't help it if I miss him Vila. I know we didn't always see eye to eye but..." He crossed his arms and stood there in front of Vila, the man he had shared his life with for the last year and finally told him how he felt.
"It's his anniversary tomorrow. Two years since he died. I just don't know how to feel... One minute I'm deliriously happy that I have you... the next I feel like I'm betraying him... We were together for so long Vila, long before we met you. Long before we started all this..." he gestured around the room and sank to his knees.
"I can't help the way I feel Vila, and I'm sorry if I've been sending you mixed signals, but it always hits hard at this time... I thought we'd be together forever... then we were caught. And then he rescued us. We could be together again. But it was never the same..." he paused, looking up at Vila, staring at that face and those blue eyes, so deep he thought he might drown in them. He took a deep breath and continued. "It was never the same because I'd met you. Blake knew it... he just never wanted to accept it... The fact that I could fall in love with someone else never even crossed his mind. He used to laugh at me, tell me it would never come to anything... that you would never love me... quite the opposite. He delighted in telling me how much you hated me."
"Oh Avon... I never hated you... I felt the same, you know I did, otherwise we would never have happened. I'm sorry he used to say such horrible things to you. He was an incredibly possessive man." /just like me/ he silently added. "But he's not here now... I am... you don't have to hide your feelings from me, or anyone else for that matter. They all know and they accept us. You know Cali even told me that we were better together that you and Blake ever were. She said we had a... now what was it she said? Ah, a 'more equal partnership' And I'd like to think she's right."
"She normally is..." replied Avon, a small smile tugging at the corner of his thin lips. "Oh Vila... I guess over the years we've both sent out a lot of mixed signals..."
"Damn right, it's amazing we did what we did..." Vila retorted with a small chuckle. "We should vow, here and now to never hide anything from one another again... to always talk about how we feel. Nothing you could say would ever make me hate you, remember that my love." He tenderly raised a hand up to stroke Avon's cheek. Avon smiled and leaned into the caress.
"Agreed" he said closing his eyes and savouring the sensation. "I love you my Vila..."
"And I love you too my Avon." They enveloped each other in a gentle, warming hug before Avon finally broke the silence and pulled away, staring deep into Vila's eyes.
"Vila, we promised to tell each other the truth and how we feel right?"
"Yes" replied Vila nodding, wondering what bombshell his lover was going to drop.
"Well, right now I want you to make love to me..."
"With pleasure my sweet..."