Have you ever felt that there was no way you could go on with your life? When everything you've ever worked for comes crashing down around your ears? When everyone you care about just suddenly aren't there anymore? Welcome to my world. No, my world hasn't always been like this. I had a family, friends, my life was good. Then the Heartless came. I lost everything I had that day, but found something new. I may not have a heart, but I have friends, family. Well, almost family. We Nobodies don't really have a family, since we can't feel anything. But, we have each other. And to me, that's all that mattered.

Now it's happening again. One by one, I'm losing everyone I care about. Heart or no heart, I can feel their absence. It's like a black hole in my chest, sucking away everything I thought I had. The pain is agonizing. Even more so because I've done this all before. Once again, whatever heart I have left is being ripped into tiny shreds of its former self.

I'm starting to think, death might not be so bad. Years of suffering, finally at an end. Sweet release. The only downside is, I have to watch almost all my closest friends go first.

First it was Roxas, left to go find Sora. Then it was Vexen, killed by Axel. Larxene never stood a chance against the Keyblade Master and his friends. Marluxia did some damage, but didn't make it either. Lexaeus, felled by Riku. Then Zexion. Axel made sure he wouldn't ever talk. Even Xaldin, strong as he was, couldn't beat Sora. My friends and family, killed by two scrawny twerps with funny-looking swords, helped out by a talking duck and some kind of dog thing along with one of our own. If that's not depressing, I don't know what is.

Thanks to Sora, I can't run to my best friend Zexion when I'm depressed or in trouble. He was always there to help me out of a tight spot or to cheer me up when even I got down. I can't even go to Saïx or Xigbar now. Xemnas keeps Saïx close and Xigbar only just got back from The Land of Dragons, messing with Sora's head no doubt, to buy us some time. I miss the days when Saïx would awkwardly pat my head when I went to him, smiling that half-happy, half-uncertain smile of his. Xigbar would have simply scooped me up into a bone-crushing and completely unnecessary hug. I can't have any of that now.

My head automatically nods as I accept whatever mission Xemnas has just assigned me. Its not as if I could have refused anyway. Not that it really matters, as I'm still lost in my memories. Memories of how, when it got really stormy, Zexion used to read me horror books and Xigbar would jump on me from behind, making me scream while he, Roxas, Axel, and Zexion laughed. I used to help Marluxia tend his plants, while staying as far away from that man-eating fly trap as possible. Vexen would sometimes ask me to help him test out some of his new inventions, and afterward, he'd let me use special potions he had put away, just for me. They used to turn people into animals, turns things blue, make anything into water, and I never knew which one I'd get to use. I would watch Lexaeus work on the gumi ships while handing him tools. I would spar with Roxas, and we'd end up laughing so hard, we'd both fall over. Xaldin and I used to have dance parties; we were the best dancers in the whole castle. I wish those days had never ended. Why do all good things have to come to an end? Is it a curse I carry? Does my life have to fall apart every time I put it back together?

Luxord and Xigbar are giving me strange looks as I shuffle out of the Superior's room. I must look like hell right now; with my hair un-gelled and hanging in my face, which is set into an almost constant frown, bags under my eyes from not having slept in days, but most of all, my complete silence. I haven't said a word since Axel came back from Castle Oblivion with the news that everyone but him had been killed. A few days later, he got drunk and spilled how they had really died. My beloved Sitar sits in a corner of my room, untouched. Why sing and dance when your world come crashing down? I have nothing to say, nothing to sing, no reason to be "happy" anymore. I know we're all doomed. Why pretend?

Xigbar touches my shoulder as I pass by, but I shake my head and he lets go, watching me disappear into a portal to my room. I can't see his face, but I know it's sad, maybe a little hurt that I won't even let him try to comfort me. I don't really care anymore. My will to continue, to live, to exist is gone. Smashed by an over-large key in the hands of a teenager.

I pull my mission papers out of my pocket and the ghost of a once bright and happy smile touches the corners of my lips. Hallow Bastion. The fortress of the Organization's enemies. I am to fight Sora, subdue him, and bring him back to the World that Never Was. Perfect. For me, this is a suicide mission, and Xemnas knows it. The way he sees it, if I somehow win, Sora's out of the picture. If I lose, he's just gotten rid of a member who's only hurting moral and pulling everyone else down. I glance at the clock on my bright blue wall. I only have an hour until I leave. Good, plenty of time to say good bye.

I grab my Sitar, dismissing it until I need it to fight. Then I exit my room, closing the door behind me, never to be opened again. Quickly, I portal to the lounge, where everyone but Xemnas is bound to be at this hour, waiting for missions and trying to relax. When I appear, Xigbar is the first on his feet, looking older and more tired then I've ever seen him before. I take a deep breath and abruptly run over and hug him around his unusually skinny waist. He hugs me back and I quickly slip away toward Luxord, who surprises me by hugging me first and slipping a bright blue die into my hands with a tired and lopsided smile. I raise my eyebrows at him questioningly and he shrugs.

"Lucky die for ya." He mutters. Then he sits down as Saïx enters the room. Even he loks worn-out and older than before, and his face falls a bit more when he sees me. I sigh and hug him, despite his obvious discomfort, and pull away to look sadly at my friends.

'Only six of us left, not including Axel, the traitor.' My mind shies away from the thought of my once-best friend killing some of our own. 'Soon to be five of us.' I smile my ghost smile and softly utter the one word not even Nobodies want to hear before I disappeared into another portal. Headed for sweet, eternal sleep.

"Goodbye."

As everyone knows, when even Demyx is depressed, there's no surviving. I was in a really bad mood when I wrote this, so it was fitting. Now I like it cause it proves I CAN write horror/death stories. So HA!

KH2 (c) Square Enix