A/N: Helga is 15 when the story starts. She is in her first year of High School. I'll be honest that this is semi-factual. I wrote this needing a reason to let it out of my system. This is how I have helped others by writing about past experiences, and melding it into a story. I won't get preachy. You just know that rape is bad.

Please read the second A/N at the end.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hey Arnold

She was in the far corner of her room. Her hair hung loosely. Limp. She scrubbed her body with a wash cloth, a sponge, and ended it with a loofah. The shower was so hot that her skin begged her to stop, but she couldn't. She still felt unclean. She felt more worthless than before this nightmare happened. Her eyes were so puffy from all the crying she did, she wondered if she had any tears left. She wore really baggy clothes to hide her body away. She burned the uniform she was made to wear for a few years. If they wanted it back, they can go to hell. That's where they belonged. Her parents checked up on her, but she knew she hadn't spoke a word to them. Or did she?

Hearing a male voice outside shouting to someone, Helga tightened her knees up against her chest. Her head rested on her knees and she willed never to hear another guy right now. Her father being the exception. He was now understanding to her situation without pulling the, Pataki pride on her again. For some reason, a reason she was sure her mother had some doing with, he decided to not do that. He offered to pay for more self-defense classes. Classes he will make sure only women train you. Anything to make her comfortable. Anything to get his fighter of a daughter back. She knew that was nice of him to do. It was nice when he sat down beside her a few hours ago to wrap his arm around her shoulder to comfort her.

*Flashback*

Private school had much bigger rules than regular public school. Helga didn't like to be regulated so heavily, but seeing as no one really knew her, she remained more quiet. Her family thought this would be better for her. They believed that with her brain she could do it. Sometimes it felt odd that even her own father started calling her by her actual name. It felt odd to have him patting her shoulder in a almost prideful way. She knew it was nice compared to when she was younger, but still odd.

She only had a couple of friends, but nothing as close to her old ones. With her schedule, it was hard to have that time with the PS118 crew. She hardly saw even Arnold anymore. It was something she hated, but at the same time, she needed it. She needed to move past her obsessive need for him. He was her drug of choice. A drug that could build her up or knock her down. He only knocked her down when he paid attention to another pretty face forcing her to get meaner to him. It was her way of keeping his attention. Soon, she learned not to do that. She loved him far too much to keep up with her own stupidity.

In this new school, she kept to herself. She had two girls she spoke with there, and a guy who couldn't get enough of flirting with her. It was a nice change for a guy to do that so she talked to him. He flirted. She would sometimes mock. He didn't seem to mind her mocking. He seemed to love it more than any other guy around. He asked her out, and she would blush. She never accepted. Oh, she wanted to, but her schedule she made for herself, kept her back. It was the schedule of not wanting to form too much attachment right now. He persisted still.

He persisted to the point of how her current state is right now.

While all classes were in session, she was in the restroom alone. As she was in the toilet stall, she finished off only faintly hearing the sound of someone else entering. She ignored it since it obviously was another girl using the bathroom. Adjusting her uniform, she was stepping out when a person slammed her back into the stall. She blacked out for a bit only coming to at the feeling of another entering inside of her. Helga's eyes flew open. She tried to push him off. She looked into the eyes of the guy who had been flirting with her. Helga hit him. She squealed till he hit her against the wall harder.

He took more than her virginity away that day. He took away her life. She felt dead inside. Felt her soul get ripped away. She was also dirty. Helga stayed in that bathroom not knowing what to do. Does the dead still talk to the living? Do they?

She saw her panties ripped apart. She saw the blood on her legs. She had to clean that off.

She stumbled out of the stall to quickly clean herself up only halting to catch a glimpse of her face. Hunching over, she began to cry. Why her? No one will believe her. No one ever believed her before when she spoke the truth so this wouldn't be any different. She choked on the saliva building up in her throat. Putting her hair out of her ponytail, Helga didn't want anyone to take a gander of her face fully. She had two classes left. She could do this.

Can't she?

Helga almost yanked some hair out to remove that memory, but knew it wouldn't of helped. She will be forever unclean. She won't trust another male. How could she?

*Flashback 2*

After a few days, she couldn't take it no more. His smug face each time he observed her. His sick voice filling her ears. She hated him more than anything. He made her a ghost. He killed her inside. So she confronted him. Confronted his smug face in the quad. She yelled in his face drawing in many around her. She didn't care. Girls needed to hear this. The counselor needed to hear, but it seemed after her telling the counselor this she didn't think it was possible. They sided with the guy. Just because they didn't believe her. Helga heard the faculty talking about her and about him while she stayed inside the office. She ran out. Ran out to the buses.

They sent security out for her. Helga spotted them going through each bus trying to locate her. Everyone was talking inside her own bus, and she knew it was useless to hide. Helga saw them on her own bus speaking to the driver, and she swiftly took her bag to bring it out front. They made her walk all the way back to the office. It was more shame to endure. Shame because they didn't believe her. Shame to be marched back to have all her peers speak immediately behind her back. She wanted to end her life once and for all.

Her mom got her. Thankfully she was sober when she came. In truth, Miriam had been sober for a few years now. Miriam was called from work to get her. She lectured her, and Helga was silent till she finally told her what happened. Miriam didn't know what to say. She was processing the information. Helga wanted to run forever. Leave everyone behind. Move to a deserted island. What will Bob say?

Bob yelled at her. Bob called her a slut, a whore, and does she want to open her legs up to every guy she met. Helga couldn't believe the words coming from his mouth. He never spoke like this to her before making her scream something out before dashing out the door, and going for a very long run. She thought she heard her mother yelling, but it had to be her imagination.

It would be 9pm when she came back softly in the house. She didn't want to speak to anyone, but when she saw her father approaching, Helga flinched holding her hands up to halt him from saying anything more horrible. Bob didn't, he grabbed her, and held her tightly against him. He apologized to her. Wished he could take it all back. Helga wished he could too. The words. What happened to her.

Bob wanted to know what happened so she explained it all. All the way up to how the school dragged her off like a criminal. Bob listened to every word and he said the sentence that made her cry even more heavily.

"You were raped."

Helga collapsed against him as more tears appeared. She was choking, Bob was lifting her up to bring her to her bedroom. He was being a real father to her now. She needed her parents. She needed support.

She just hated guys in general.

As the days progressed, and she was on suspension, they put her through a whole review. They pelted her with questions all at once. Helga was becoming more frightened over adults, sans her parents. She remembered the song that was playing outside the window that moment. It was a song that will make her relive it all. She knew of this. She hated them for protecting the boy and not protecting her. They believed her to be a harlot.

Helga wanted to kill herself. She hadn't wrote since then. She stuck by her family.

"Helga?" Phoebe's voice called her gently. Her dearest friend came when she called.

Helga wasn't moving, but she saw her approaching. Saw her sit down next to her. Helga instantly wrapped her arms around her. She guessed she didn't dry out all her tears since she was sobbing uncontrollably against her shoulder.

Phoebe was stunned. She knew Helga was sensitive, but she never seen her like this before. Helga was one of those soft, but strong girls. Someone she can both admire and fear. Oh the fear isn't nothing like anyone would think it was. It was something of hoping she would never harm herself when she got bold.

"Helga, what happened? Please tell me." Phoebe almost cried herself. She wanted to protect her in ways that her own friend protected her. When Helga opened her mouth up, Phoebe's eyes went wider and wider. This wasn't the horror she was imagining. Phoebe moved her hand into her hair. "I'm never leaving you, Helga. I'll be here for you always." She promised.

Helga knew she will be. She always has been. "You are also my family." She whimpered out the truth.

Phoebe was touched with those words. Loved her deeply. "You are mines too." She meant it. She'll do everything for her. She hoped to see that smile again on her face. The smile that lit up her face.

A/N 2: The part in the bathroom, the conference where they pummeled her with questions, the guy acting like he did nothing wrong, the school not believing her, getting pulled off the school bus by security because I ran off, mother lecturing me, and father calling me all those things before settling down, are all me. I have felt dead for the longest time. I was 15 when it happened to me. I spent a long time talking about this. I never hold back in sharing my own experience. It helps to heal when you have people care about you. Helps to heal when you talk about it. Help others.

I chose Helga to write this story. I always loved this character. I think she is a wonderfully complex character in my opinion. I do write mostly in a few other cartoon shows. This is my first Hey Arnold fanfiction story. Please forgive me on heavy content. Also forgive me if I have some grammar mistakes. This is a really hard subject to talk about at times.