Pieces of my Life Part 1
My life is similar to a puzzle. Complicated at every turn and sometimes never finding the right pieces to fit perfectly. But, then again nothing is perfect the way you want it to be. Neither love nor a friendship is perfect but, that is what makes life worth wild; mistakes make you who you are. Pieces to my life are simple: friends, family, God, sports, laughter, love, and most of all living. My family and friends make my life interesting day by day always knowing how to put a smile on my face. When it seems like no one is there God is always standing by your side. Without sports, idk what I would do; I worry about my body and what people think of it all the time. I love swimming and playing basketball but, sometimes I just wanna be a normal teenager. Hang out with friends; go to a party instead of continuous studying all the time. Is that so hard to ask for? It seems like when things get perfect some rain or thunder has to come and shake things up in your world. That flow of rain or thunder is what I like to call finding my sexuality. My name is Emily Fields and this is my story. My love life is not a boy meets girl kind of love story rather girl meets girl. I have had my share of boyfriends but, none of them I can really say I loved. I started having feelings towards girls in about eighth grade but, never really came out of the closet or did not want to. Staying in the closet was my safe haven somewhere I knew I would be protected. But, sometimes your wishes do not always come true and you are pushed out of the closet on your face even when you least expect it. Pain, anger, and trouble finding yourself and who you are bottles up inside of you where you cannot take it anymore. But, once I came out my life seemed to be getting better. My friends were accepting of it now; the only challenge was to get my parents on board. My parents think of it as just a phase that everyone goes through and nothing more. They do not believe me. My parents are my strongest supporters with anything except this. I just want my parents back. The only person that understands me is Maya. I remember it like yesterday when I first met Maya St. Germaine at a camp during the summer. We became close and started talking continuously after summer ended. It was hard saying goodbye but, in reality we did not live that far away from each other. She has big brown eyes, active in sports, funny, pretty, and had a big heart from what I could tell. She is quiet on the outside but, loud when you get to know her. We got along perfectly. I was no expert at that time of telling if people were gay or not but, I had a strong feeling she was something. I would tell her so many things but, I refrained myself and told myself to just remain friends for the better. I would tell her how much I love her smile and everything about her if I had the courage but, I was scared. We made a friendship fairly quick and are good friends now. We help each other through a lot with things relating to our sexuality and are there for one another if need be. But, what do you do when you want something more than a friendship but, just do not know the words to express it? This could be a phase or it could be the start of my life. Finding who I am, my place in the world, and my sexuality. This is only the first part; I will get into more detail later. Let me know if you guys like it and if I should continue writing off this. I am open for suggestions. I had finally had time to write this one since, I got my wisdom teeth removed and laying down with my new best friends an ice pack and pain pills. XD This is for everyone who feels like they are missing something or someone in their life to keep pushing forward, because you will find that missing piece somewhere soon.
PLL coming back in January! :D