A/N: Humor never has been one of my stronger talents, but I tried my best to make this vignette at least mildly amusing. Don't flame me if I failed, please.
Disclaimer: I don't own Police Quest, though I wish I did. This is a fictitious Police Quest spinoff I have going here for fun.
It was a pretty nice day in Lytton, California. The Lytton Police Department was humming with activity as usual, figuratively speaking, of course. And in the Narcotics office, two cops who had been friends almost since they had met were enjoying a slow moment in their daily work by chatting about past cases and personal things.
"Hey, Lloyd," said Officer Kim Walters to her partner in Narcotics, "remember that case back in '82, where we took down two gambling suspects in Lytton City Park? I went in and observed the scene behind cover when we heard from our sources about juveniles gambling in the park, and you covered the exit in case any of the suspects did foot bail."
"Oh, yeah, I remember that," said Officer Lloyd Pratt as they reminisced about the past, "You had to run after one suspect who ran deep into the park, while I grabbed the one who attempted to leave by the exit. I also recall that you were pretty damn proud of yourself for running him down."
"Why shouldn't I have been?" said Kim. "Not only did we stop a crime in progress, but I showed that a woman can do the same dangerous front-line work a man can do, while you had to do the lady's work at the exit. It was the other way around when Sonny and Laura Watts took down those drug pushers, Simms and Colby, while investigating the Death Angel case. Sonny, the man, got all the action in the park, while Laura, the woman, covered the exit. I guess we can't all be perfect." She laughed.
So did Lloyd. "Police work is still a masculine job, Kim," he said, "and women who want to do it have to become at least partly masculine themselves. Showgirls can't make it in the business of crime fighting, you know."
Kim feigned disbelief and insult. "Are you telling me that just because I'm young, blond and attractive, I'm not fit to be as good as you, macho man? Look at me! I can handle a nightstick, handcuffs, and pistol as well as any man, and I know how to look professional and attractive simultaneously, too. What do you think of that?"
Lloyd decided it wasn't worth arguing about anymore. "If you say so, Detective Walters. Just don't let any male traffic violators seduce you if you're ever transferred back to the Traffic Division."
Kim glared at him. "Of course not, Detective Pratt," she said mockingly, "I wouldn't dream of it."
"So then," said Lloyd, "what's you're opinion on the latest album, Blam!, Kim? Sonny told me it's one of your favorites."
"Yeah," said Kim, "it's the best. The Brothers Johnson really know how to play music, those guys! And my favorite songs on the album are 'Rocket Countdown' and 'Ride-O-Rocket.' You should hear it sometime."
"Hmm, maybe I will, maybe I won't," said Lloyd, "Depends on how my schedule is and how much the other officers on the force like it."
"But Lloyd," exclaimed Kim, "you should know that I'm the only officer in this police department who has a keen interest in Afro-American pop music! If you listen to them, you'll never give it a chance."
"Well, that's life, isn't it?" said Lloyd. "We can't all enjoy the same things. Besides, where are those guys when the coke hits the fan and kids start dropping like flies? Life isn't all sunshine and roses, or maybe I should say, it isn't all rockets and rackets."
"Why, you!" mock-growled Kim, tossing a pencil at Lloyd. Lloyd laughed and said, "Oh yeah? Take this!" He threw a whole pencil holder at Kim. She ducked. The pencil holder and it's pencils sailed over her head and scattered all around the desk of Detective Steve Jones. He and Lieutenant John Dooley looked at them in annoyance.
"Hey," said Steve, "watch where you're throwing those things!" He started to pick up the pencils.
"Don't bother, Jones," said Dooley, "Detectives Pratt and Walters can take care of that. Now," he turned to Kim and Lloyd, "what's this childishness all about?"
"She started it!" said Lloyd.
"Oh no, macho man, you started it!" said Kim.
"I don't care who bloody started it!" Dooley said sternly, "What's it about?"
Lloyd and Kim looked a little embarrassed. "We were just, uh, lightening the mood in here, sir," said Kim. "We, uh, just wanted to enjoy ourselves a little bit while things are going slowly here."
"You're not comedians, detectives," said Dooley, "You're police officers. And on-duty is not a time for frivolities. You must always be alert for the next call or case to respond to. Try to remember that next time you want to clown around in this police station."
"Yes, sir," said Lloyd and Kim humbly.
"That's better," said Dooley, "Now, pick up those pencils and get back to work."
"Of course, sir," they responded, and got up to clean up the mess they made. But as they did, Lloyd whispered to Kim, "Next time, partner, throw something that won't poke out an eye or stab an important report. We can't all be perfect, but I know a dangerous circus act when I see it."
Kim said, "Don't forget, my man, that you threw multiple pencils, not me, and I know when I've been stood up."
They snickered quietly. Dooley heard it anyway, and gave them a disapproving look. They went back to their desks and behaved themselves for the rest of the day.
They never were fired for their frivolous conversations while on-duty, but even other humorous officers, like Steve, Keith Robinson, and Sonny Bonds, wondered how Kim Walters had managed to help Lloyd Pratt lighten up after his days of using drugs on-duty. Maybe that was just the influence of a California girl with a love of life and the looks of a stunning beach model.
