Ten Years Later
FOUR GIFTS
Buffy walked barefoot through the upstairs hallway, with her light blue dress fluttering behind her. At the top of the landing, Buffy watched Xander and Giles run up the stairs. The dog followed them.
"What's wrong?" Buffy asked. "Why aren't you two dressed?"
Xander looked at his watch and slipped past her into one of the bedrooms. "We've got loads of time, Buff."
She turned to Giles. "What's wrong?"
Giles put his glasses on. "We were helping Jeffery's father set up the last of the chairs."
"I thought you finished that last night."
"We didn't have time after we located the origin of the curse."
In England, they didn't fight as many vampires as in Sunnydale, but curses were popular.
Giles smiled. "But it's done now. The guests are arriving."
Buffy inhaled. "Is everything ready?"
"Yes, your aunt is in charge of getting the food set up. Your cousins are out front telling people where to park."
She stared at him skeptically.
"Buffy, everything is fine."
"Maybe I'll go check downstairs—"
He stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. "All you need to worry about is Dawn."
Two months ago when Dawn and Jeffery decided to get married, no one was surprised. They had been together for years after having met in London. But when they wanted to "just get it over with," Buffy had to beg Dawn to let her throw a proper wedding.
The only request Dawn and Jeffery had was that the ceremony be simple. Buffy worked hard to keep it simple. The wedding was outside, the food was catered by a local restaurant, Jeffery worked at a bakery so he made the wedding cake, and the tables and chairs scattered on the lawn were an eclectic mixture of things found at yard sales and second hand stores. Giles, Xander, and Jeffery spent weeks putting together picnic tables.
The past two months had been the most wonderfully stressful of Buffy's life. She planned the entire thing with little time or money. She had not slept in days and loved every minute of it. She felt normal. There were moments when her destiny seemed only to plan the perfect (and simple) wedding for Dawn.
Giles eagerly offered his house for the event. The scenic views and short drive from Jeffery's hometown made it a perfect location. It was a large and old two story stone house about two hours outside of London. Even after Giles sold off half of the land to pay for repairs, the house still sat on twenty acres of rolling hills. After inheriting it from an aunt about five years ago, Giles and the others had slowly gone to great pains to restore the estate.
A few summers ago, when Giles was away on Watcher business, Buffy took down the wallpaper and repainted most of the interior. The new paint was mostly white and pale yellows—it brightened the rooms substantially. Dawn and Jeffery, when they lived there briefly, cut back some of the overgrown ivy from the windows to let in more light. Giles never complained about any of their home improvements.
In recent years, when not traveling to some far away land to fight some foreign demon, they all gravitated to England. Xander, Willow had apartments elsewhere and Dawn had lived with Jeffery for about a year, but when they convened, it was at Giles' house. After selling her place in Rome, Buffy's only real home was his home. And Buffy was the only one who had her own room.
After Sunnydale, the group tried to spend holidays and birthdays together, but they often failed in those attempts. It was Thanksgiving, however, that they were never allowed to miss. Oddly enough, it was Giles who demanded that they spend that holiday together. Buffy know that if it were not for his demands, they all may have drifted farther apart. That yearly ritual was the thing that led them back to something they had long ago.
Last Christmas was the first Christmas since Sunnydale that the entire gang celebrated it together. It was then that Willow formally named the massive English estate Fort Giles. To make it official, Xander carved Fort Giles into the cross sections of an old tree stump and placed it near the front drive.
"People are already here?" Buffy asked. She went to the end of the hallway and looked out the second story window. A few people were mingling on the back lawn with wrapped gifts in their hands.
Buffy went back to Giles. "You need to get dressed."
He was wearing faded jeans and a white T-shirt.
"You can't walk her down the aisle in that."
He put a hand on her shoulder. "How are you doing, Buffy?"
"I'd be better if you put your suit on."
He nodded. "Right."
Jeffery ran up the stairs. The groom was not dressed, either. He was a tall and lean Englishman with red hair. Buffy had never in her life met anyone who smiled as much as Jeffery. It never left his face. At first, she thought it was fake, but over time she realized that he was just honestly happy—all the time. His happiness was infectious. She was fond of him.
"God," Buffy said, "What is it with you guys? Get dressed."
Giles patted Jeffery on the back. "Ready, son?"
Buffy interjected. "He's not ready—he's not dressed."
"Well," Giles said, "that's not exactly what I meant."
Jeffery nodded. "I'm ready. I feel great. Do you have any words of wisdom, Giles? All my dad said to me was, 'If you mess this up, I won't let you move back home.'"
"Ah, I'm not sure. I've not been lucky in love, so I may not be the best person for advice." He sighed. "I have learned, however, that if you put your heart above all else, you'll never lose. I hear it's not easy, though."
Jeffery hugged Giles, and then he hugged Buffy.
"Get dressed," Buffy said.
Giles smiled and led Jeffery into the bedroom Xander had gone into.
When the door closed behind them, Buffy was left alone in the hall with the dog. She took deep breath stared into the eyes of her big, bouncy Boxer.
"Skip, she's getting married," she whispered to the dog. "My little sister is getting married."
She patted the dog on the head and opened the door to the master bedroom where Dawn was getting ready.
Willow and Dawn were sifting through the many shades of lipstick they had spread out on the bed.
"What if I say the wrong thing?" Willow asked, "Could that mean that the marriage isn't legal?"
"Willow, we already signed the paperwork. Technically, Jeffery and I are already married. This is just a party."
"I have a cheat-sheet in case I blank out. I just want it to be perfect." Willow's dress was a soft yellow. Once she'd decided to officiate the ceremony, it took her weeks to find the right dress that was both carefree and authoritative.
"It'll be perfect," Buffy said.
"Hey, Buffy." Willow turned around. "Are the guys ready?"
"Almost." Buffy drew back the blinds and light spilled into the room. The light stretched across the back of Dawn's shoulders. "It's such a beautiful day." Buffy stared out the window. "Everything is in bloom. Giles planted those flowers near the getting-married spot just for today."
Dawn stood and Buffy took her in. Like the ceremony, Dawn's dress was simple. It flowed around her body when she moved. It looked white at first glance, but it was really a very light blue.
Willow sighed. "You're so beautiful, Dawnie."
Buffy and Dawn just stared at each other—eyes locked, knowing. There was so much to say. There was so much to remember.
Since moving to Europe, things had changed between them. It seemed it was Dawn who made the decisions for them now. The first two years were spent in Rome, and they were only there because Dawn wanted to live there. Willow, Xander, and Giles were busy traveling the globe and training the new ones, and that left just Buffy and Dawn. They suddenly had all the time in the world, and they became friends. No longer was Buffy struggling to be a guardian—she instead focused on being a sister; she worked to be Dawn's confidant, her listening ear, and her mentor.
It was after Dawn and Jeffery started watching Giles' house when he was away that Buffy began spending more time in England, and it was after Dawn moved in with Jeffery that Buffy sold her apartment in Rome—a place she loved—and sent all of her stuff to Giles' house. Buffy knew that she would follow Dawn to the end of the earth, and with every passing year, that feeling was more pronounced. Buffy didn't want to live a life away from her. After her years of relative independence in Rome, Buffy realized that she didn't want to live away from any of them. She longed for her family.
As Buffy stared into Dawn's eyes, she knew there no one she would ever love more.
The dog jumped on the bed and disrupted the carefully sorted lipsticks.
"Oh no," Willow said, "We got lipstick on the bedspread."
Buffy smiled. "You better hope Giles doesn't see that."
She tried to rub it off. "You know he will." She tried once more. "I'll get it later—preferably before he goes to bed tonight."
They could hear the chattering of the guests in the back garden.
Buffy looked to Willow. "I think it's about time."
"Right. I'll be back," Willow said. "I'll make sure the boys are on track."
"Dawn," Buffy said once they were alone, "she's right, you are beautiful."
"Thanks." Dawn took her hands. "And thank you for doing this for me. It was a lot of work."
"Yes it was. And I have an ulcer."
Buffy hugged her. Dawn was warm and soft. Her hair smelled like the lavender shampoo she always used. She pressed her cheek against her sister's and was overwhelmingly grateful she couldn't remember a time without her. "Dawn, I'd do anything for you."
"I know. You proved that a long time ago."
"Okay." Buffy let go of her. "Spin around. Let me have a look."
Dawn spun and the skirt of her dress splayed away from her. "I wish mom were here," she said when she stopped spinning.
"I know. I've been thinking a lot about her lately. She'd be so proud of you."
"I've felt her, Buffy. I think she's with us."
"Always." Buffy wiped away a stray tear. "I see her in you."
"I wish we had something of hers." Dawn shrugged. "Everything was lost."
Buffy took a deep breath. "I know. Luckily, Dad says he still has a bunch of photo albums that he kept after the divorce. I asked him to bring copies of some pictures."
Dawn smiled weakly. "Do you think Dad will show?"
"He said he'd be here. When you talked to him, did he say when he'd get in?"
"No."
There was a tentative knock on the door, and the dog's ears perked up. Willow's voice rang through: "I have some guests."
"Come in," Dawn said.
Willow led Giles and Xander in the room. Giles was in a light tweed suit reminiscent of his watcher clothes, and Xander wore what he called "a navy blue suit without the jacket or tie." They all gushed over each other and over Dawn before a quiet fell over them.
"This is such a joyous day." Giles sighed. "I'm quiet emotional, actually."
Willow squeezed Giles' hand.
"What Giles is trying to say," Xander said, "is that we have gifts. And it's kind of a theme. So…"
They all looked at each other.
"I'll go first." Willow stepped forward and exhaled. "Dawn…Oh, I'm nervous. Okay." She sighed. "Tara wrote me a note one morning, back when we were living at your house. She left it by my side of the bed. She used to do that—leave me notes." Willow paused and unfolded the paper. "She wrote: 'Willow, I'm taking Dawn to school. I missed you so much during our time apart, but I didn't realize how much I missed everyone else. The simple act of packing Dawn's lunch this morning while listening to her talk about inventing a new kind of sandwich has filled me with so much joy. This is the family I always wanted. I love you, and I'll be home soon.'"
She folded the paper delicately along the well worn creases. "This is one of the only things I have left of her. She wrote it a day before she…before she died." Willow held the letter out for Dawn. "I loved the way Tara cared about you. She was always kind and understanding. Her heart captivated me. Dawn, this letter is my gift to you. It may not be much, but she wrote it. She touched this paper to write about love and about you. I can't tell you how many times I've read it. I put it in my pocket before we went to fight The First—I knew I couldn't do what I needed to do without her. Dawn, she loved you so much and I know she's watching over you."
Dawn took the paper. "Willow, she wrote this for you."
Willow nodded. "She was the love of my life. I'd be so happy to know that you have this part of her—her words and her flowy handwriting."
Dawn traced her thumb over the paper before giving Dawn a hug. "I loved her."
Xander bounced on the balls of his feet. "Can I go next?"
Dawn smiled.
He held a picture fame in his hands. "As you know Anya loved money. She loved the magic shop, too. It made her feel useful and it made her feel like she was part of the gang. On her first day of work—when she was closing up for the day—I took this picture of her next to the cash register."
He held up the framed picture for everyone to see. It was of Anya smiling with money in her hands the colorful shop all around her.
"I forgot about this picture. I never had the film developed. But luckily, my parents were one of the first to evacuate Sunnydale so they got all of their stuff out. My mom, had the camera, I guess, and she had the film developed a few years ago." He looked at the photo and smiled. "My mom mailed it to me. Doesn't Anya look happy?"
They all nodded.
"It's the only picture I have of her," Xander continued. "There are times when I think about her and for a moment, I can't really remember what she looks like. It's just a moment, but it's terrifying. This picture has helped me remember the little things about her. The things that for so long were part of me."
He hugged Dawn and handed her the framed photo. "I want you to hold on to her, Dawn. I can't tell you how happy she would be for you. She would insult Jeffery's family and complain about having to help clean up later, but she would be here for you. And she would happily enact some serious vengeance on Jeffery if he ever hurt you."
Dawn smiled. "Yes she would."
"I love you, Dawn," Xander said, and then he wiped away tears. "Giles, it's your turn."
Giles patted Xander on the back. "Yes, I suppose so."
Buffy looked from Willow to Xander. She was already on the verge of sobbing and this seemed, suddenly, like a very inappropriate time to bring about the past. She wanted to ask what they were all thinking when they planned this.
Giles lowered his eyes and began. "Jenny was my once in a lifetime—it truly was love at first sight—something I never believed in before her. Even though you really didn't get to know her, I so wanted to give you something of Jenny's." He paused. "And I looked—but sadly I don't have anything of hers. I don't even have a photo." He looked Dawn in the eye. "She was my perfect opposite, as Jeffery is yours."
She nodded.
"But," Giles said, "I'd be remiss if I let this moment go by without giving you a gift." He took a breath. "Jenny wasn't my only love." He held up the vinyl record he had been holding.
They all waited.
"Your mother and I listened to this record one night. She looked through my collection and picked this. It's Cream—maybe you've heard of them." He handed it to her. "After her surgery, we listened to it again, several times."
Dawn slipped the record out of the sleeve.
"I cared about your mother deeply." He shifted his weight. "We had a connection."
Buffy felt a wave of confusion.
"I know she's here, looking out for you. She'd be so proud of the woman you've become—just as I am."
"Giles?" Dawn asked. "You loved her?"
He nodded. "In my own way, yes."
Buffy couldn't remember her mother listening to it, but she knew she had heard Giles play it several times since living at Fort Giles.
He looked to Dawn. "Every time I hear 'Tales of Brave Ulysses,' I think of your mum. Sometimes I put it on when I feel most alone. It brings me insurmountable joy. It reminds me of simpler times."
They were all quiet. Willow and Xander watched as Buffy and Dawn stared at the record.
"I don't have a record player," Dawn said.
"I know," Giles said warmly. "I have an extra in the living room for you."
Dawn hugged Giles. She rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes.
"Ah, Buffy." Willow nudged her. "It's your turn."
Dawn pulled away from Giles and smiled at Buffy.
Buffy opened the top dresser drawer and retrieved a box. It was black and had seen better days. She expected Dawn to recognize it. This gift really didn't need an explanation. She opened the box to show Dawn and everyone that indeed inside was the silver cross.
It was the cross Angel had given to her on that dark Sunnydale night. They all knew the story—she had retold it to Dawn many times. It was scratched and a little tarnished, but all things considered, it was in fairly good shape.
"You know Angel was the one for me, and he was dead before I met him."
They all laughed softly—morbid jokes were their forte.
"He was my Tara and Jenny and Anya. He gave me this to protect me, and it has. I used to secretly keep it with me when the fights were big ones."
Dawn smiled. "Except for the one that destroyed Sunnydale."
Buffy nodded and looked to the others. "Before we went to the school to fight The First, I made Dawn take the cross."
"I had it with me." Dawn nodded. " We argued about it, I think. I told her to keep it and she wanted me to have it. Good times."
Willow lifted her brows. "Good times?"
"I like to be positive," Dawn said. "I gave it back to her in that desert motel we stayed at that night—and we had a fight about that too. I told her she needed it and she said I should have it just in case. I won that argument."
Buffy continued. "I wanted it to protect you, Dawn, and I still want it to protect you. I want it to protect you and your love."
Dawn picked it up out of the box and proceeded to put it on.
"Oh, Dawn," Buffy said, "you don't have to wear it—it's massive and it doesn't go with anything."
"Oh, thank god." Dawn put it back in the box.
"I just want you to have it. It's the only thing I kept of his. It means a lot to me. Like Giles said, it reminds me of simpler times."
Dawn looked at the four of them and said softly, "I don't understand. Don't you want to keep these things? They're from the people you loved—and lost. I don't want to take that from you."
Xander smiled. "Dawn, we want you to have a part of the people we loved because…because we loved them, and we don't want them to be forgotten."
"They were our strength," Willow said. "They made us strong—they still make us strong."
"And," Giles said, "they are always with us. Now they're with you, too."
Dawn took a deep breath. "I don't know what to say."
Buffy sighed. "When we were trying to think of what to get you, we ended up talking about Tara and Angel and Anya and Jenny and Mom for hours." Buffy looked to the others. "It was wonderful. We were laughing and happy. We were so lucky to know them. Their love still brings us joy—despite the pain of losing them. And we just wanted you to know that we love you, and they do, too."
She set her gifts on the bed: A note, a photo, an album, and a cross.
"Dawn," Giles said, "Jeffery is a fine man."
"And don't worry," Xander smiled, "a few minutes ago Giles and I told him we'd kill him if he hurt you, just as Anya would."
Dawn wiped her eyes. "You guys are the best."
Xander shrugged and Giles smiled.
Willow said, "Is there anything else you need Dawnie? Xander and I need a head start to the ceremony."
"Yeah, Xander," Buffy said, "shouldn't you be giving Jeffery a best man pep talk right now?"
"Ah, he's fine. I told him to hang out in the kitchen and eat those little finger foods while he waits."
Dawn held out her arms. "I want a big group hug. That's what I need right now."
They all huddled in and wrapped their arms around her and around each other. Buffy closed her eyes and tried to memorize this moment. She tried not to think of the losses they had suffered or the pain they had put each other through—she tried to remember why they all continued to come back to each other time and again.
"I love you all," Dawn said. "Now let's get me hitched."