Author's note: Not too sure how well it turned out. Hoping it turned out pretty good(: Please, review and let me know if I had any luck with this one!
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha
Star-Struck Summer:
I sat on the water logged deck, my bare feet dangling, just barely dipped into the icy lake water. The sunrise crept over the surrounding trees, the water seeming to glow orange as if from within. A cool breeze flew by, tossing my hair around, the black tresses resembling little ballerinas as they twisted and whirled around me. The breeze chilled my demin short clad legs, my light blue tank offering little protection from the morning nip. I chafed my arms for a moment, the wind calming down. I leaned back and set my hands behind me – my palms flat on the deck to support my weight. I sighed, closing my eyes and tipping my head back, taking in the sky that was gradually changing from red to orange to the most vibrant lavender I'd seen yet. A blue bird scurried across the sky, its wings beating rhythmically as it crossed the span of air. Looking away from the tranquil sky, I leaned forward, my elbows placed on my knees, my head held in my hands. My toes sunk a little lower into the icy velvet of the lake and I recoiled them, keeping my toes scrunched against my foot. Another short breeze trickled by, creating the softest disturbance on the surface of the water, a serene feeling coating everything.
Yet it couldn't cloak me, no matter how much I willed it to. Taking my hands away from my face, I folded them into my lap, staring down at them in thought.
I should never have said those things. Heaven forbid they slip from my lips a second time. I surely must be going crazy. I couldn't hold my self control for all of the thirty seconds it would take for him to walk the rest of the distance down that corridor and out of my life. The words had tumbled free of their own accord, leaving me to pick up the embarrassment they brought with them.
I chuckled to myself, though no trace of humor was there. I had wanted him to stay in my life, I had willed him with all my silent might that he would still chose me over her. And in that brief moment when he was about to walk from me – from any possibility of us – my control had faltered and those words came. I shivered as I remembered the look he'd given me when he'd turned back in shock. His golden eyes burned with an uncertain emotion, his face set in a questioning frown.
Then – with unshed tears burning in my eyes – I turned and fled, disappointed with myself with my boldness. I remembered the saddening flip-flip of my sandals on the linoleum hallway floor as I ran, refusing to turn back no matter how urgently he called my name. His voice resounded throughout the hallway, echoing as if taunting me that my name graced his lips, yet she grasped his heart with both hands.
I suddenly didn't want me to find see me. Heaven knows it would kill me, and I couldn't stand to have him see me like this, not again. I wouldn't be shot down a second time, not by the one person I loved more than anything.
In my blind retreat, I had come to the place I knew I could think and feel safe, if only for a moment. I had run to the dock – our dock. I half-smiled at the memory of when it became ours. At the memory of when summer had been just a little too warm, just a little too perfect.
We had always been friends. Not close – not until that summer, anyways. We had been just friends that would occasionally chat at school about quizzes, the stupidity of exams, the complexity of trigonometry. Then, right after the first week that school let out for summer break, he had called me. I had been dumbfounded that he had gotten my number – astounded that he decided to call me of all people.
He had given a nervous 'hello', one that I had returned with just as much unsureness. He had cleared his throat, probably buying time.
"I know this is a bit sudden," he had said, "but do you think you'd be up to hanging out with me today?"
I had nodded vigorously before realizing that he couldn't see me, and was probably still waiting for his answer. Clearing my own throat, I had told him that I'd love to. I could practically visualize his cocky smile as he told me where to meet him before the familiar click of the disconnected line sounded in my phone.
That's when it started. I had met him at this exact same spot, dressed in my favorite light purple sundress, dark brown sunglasses acting as a headband to keep my unruly hair out of my face. He had already arrived, sitting at the edge of the deck, his khaki shorts almost blending into the deck – a little drier then, a little less memory logged. His red t-shirt accented everything about him, from his tan skin, to the white hair that danced around him. I had walked up behind him wordlessly, sitting down beside him, my legs folded under me. He had looked out at the crisp blue sky for a moment, wispy clouds scuttling by. Then he turned to me, his piercing gold glare almost taking my breath away. He smirked at me, his white teeth showing through those full lips of his.
"Glad you came," he had said, and my chest swelled with happiness.
"Of course I did."
And from that day on, we spent every day, every moment of the summer together. We had spent most of them in that exact spot, sometimes joking, sometimes playing in the water, sometimes just laying back on the warmed dock, watching as the clouds moved by with a certain importance to them. Other days, we had visited the local ramen café, slurping at milkshakes and testing every flavor of ramen the small shop had to offer. And whenever it rained and we were caught outside, he would take me by the hand and we would run through the refreshing water until we were drenched, and when our hair was dripping with the liquid diamonds, he would stop and just look at me. I would stare right back, trying my hardest to decifer the emotions that swirled in those golden pools.
It couldn't be helped. I fell in love. Helplessly, hopelessly, hard. I tried, honest, I did. I didn't want to end up like all the other girls who got sucked into a summer romance, star-struck by the love, crushed when reality finally set in. But, just like always, I was ordinary, normal… just like everyone else.
"It was just a summer fling," he had whispered in the hallway one day at school. "We're just friends, after all." I had dropped all my books the moment the confession slipped from his mouth, not matter how decrypted it had been. He didn't love me – I had just been someone to spend time with, someone to pass the boring hours of summer with. Everyone turned to stare as my books echoed through the hall, crashing like thunder. They stared in awe as the tears trickled down my cheeks while I looked at him. He hadn't even had the decency to look me in the eyes. If he was going to break my heart, he should've had the courage to face me while doing it! My mouth fell open in surprise, and I backed away, taking in all the faces, all the stares. Then, like the coward I was, I turned and ran for the bathroom, ready to pour my heart out in the nearest empty bathroom stall.
Then, the next day, he had been with her. God, I don't think I've envied anyone else more than I did in that one moment when I saw him put that strong arm of his around her waist and lean in ever so close and whisper in her ear. Her tinkling laughter killed me, each moment like an arrow all its own. Then he had looked up from where he was positioned between her ear and the nape of her neck, and his eyes met mine. And for that brief, painful second, the only thing I could see in his eyes was… remorse.
I had turned on my heels and walked away, the pain flooding back with the heat of all those summer days.
I never stopped loving him. Never. And I held true to that when I had seen him at the ramen diner we had always ate at, talked at, laughed at. I hadn't seen him at all this during spring break, I had guessed he had been spending time with her. Filling her mind with memories that weren't empty, memories that were true.
"I haven't seen you in forever," I had bantered, trying to ease the obvious discomfort that hung in the air. He had looked down at his feet, shifting them uncomfortably.
"Keh," he snorted, "yeah." It was quiet for what felt like an eternity before he cleared his throat, still refusing to meet my gaze. "I've been helping Kikyo pack."
"Pack?" I had questioned, false hope igniting deep within me. "Is she leaving or something?"
"We're leaving, Kagome."
He was leaving with her then? I felt crushed, unwanted, more unloved then when he had practically stamped on my heart in front of everyone that first day back to school. When I said nothing, He had scratched the back of his head, meeting my gaze timidly.
"So, uh, I guess this is goodbye. For good." He turned to make the trek down that corridor, out the clear glass doors and out of my life forever.
"Wait!" I had called. The words that should have never been unleashed, the words that I never should have let slip from my grasp, were practically sitting on my lips at this point, waiting to jump to their freedom. He stopped, but didn't turn around to look at me, his ears positioned in my direction, poised to hear the traitorous words. "You can't leave, not with her. You can't because… because…"
"I love you…"
And here I sit, the sun rising over the trees that had witnessed so many of our memories. SO many of the moments that led to my heart break. I sighed again, the wind whipping through my hair with a renewed ferocity.
I felt him coming before I ever hear the sounds of brush underfoot, already steeling myself for whatever took place. He came and sat beside me wordlessly, his feet dangling over the edge of the dock. I felt the swell of so many memories rushing to my mind, but I pushed them away. All they would do is taunt me.
It was quiet for the longest time. I could almost forget why we were here, I could almost go back to those scorching summer days. But then I remembered. He was hers, and I had been nothing more than a fling.
"Why did you run from me?"
I didn't look at him. I focused my gaze on the duck that was making its way across the water, its green tinged head bobbing as it pushed through the blue-green water. I watched as it pecked at its feathers, lifting its wings, stretching them in the growing morning heat. It shook its head, dipping it into the water for a moment, the water slipping down its back before trickling back into the water below.
"Well?"
I ran a hand through my hair, the black curls tumbling over my shoulders and down my back. I hadn't cut my hair since that summer, so by this point, it was half way down my back. It picked at a stranded, inspecting a horrid split end, making a mental note to get a trim, if nothing else.
"Why won't you answer me, wench?"
"And why should I?" I shot back, not looking at him. Though, my tone was harsh enough, because he stopped for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "After all," I continued after his silence ensued. "I was just a fling to you. Nothing more."
He growled beside me, a nearly silent rumble deep within his chest. I ignored him still.
"You really are an idiot, aren't you?"
"Wh-what?" I finally looked at him, his golden eyes piercing as daggers – daggers poised straight for my heart.
"How could you think such a thing?" he barked, turning his body so he could face me better. My brows shot straight into my bangs, amazement filling every inch of me.
"You said so yourself—"
"I lied!"
He had cut me off with such ferocity, I had to gasp a little. I hadn't been expecting any of this.
"Lied?" I repeated, unsure of if I should believe him or not. He put both hands on his face, groaning in frustration.
"Yes," he said through his hands. He sounded resigned, tired.
"Why?"
His shoulders shrugged and his hands fell to rest on top of mine. Heat shot through me like a fire searching for a way out inside my body. I stared down at our hands before looking up to meet his amber gaze that seemed to hold me where I was.
"I don't really know," he replied, his voice barely above a whisper as his gaze fell to the water rippling beneath us – around us. "Maybe I was scared."
"Scared?" I spit the word out as if it were poisonous. What did he know about being scared? He didn't have to pour his heart out all summer long into a love that he knew could never be. He had never had to watch as the entire school watched him get his heart torn into little pieces before being through into the air, left to fall back down like this pieces of confetti. He didn't know what it was like to have to face his reason for living day after day after day, knowing that with every stolen glance… it would always be unrequited.
"Yeah," he murmured. "I was scared that you… you wouldn't want me, that I wasn't good enough for you."
How could he say that? I wanted him more than anything, needed him more than air, craved him more than the sweetest chocolate this world had to offer. He was why I got up every morning and dragged on through the torturous day. He was why, even when his smile was directed at her, his smile still made me feel like everything was going to be okay.
"You're a fool," I told him. He looked back at me in surprise. "If you couldn't see how I felt for you all those hot, summer days, then you're a downright fool." I stopped at glanced away, taking a deep breath so I could hold on to my tearless façade. "Every moment I spent with you was perfect, each better than the one before. You say you were scared, but how do you think I felt? Watching as you told me I was nothing to you, watching as you left my side for her."
His gaze held, but he said nothing, his breaths soft and steady. I pulled my hands out from under his and pressed them to my face, slowly losing my grip. "She was good enough for you," I breathed, not really meaning for him to hear.
He grabbed my wrists and pulled my hands from my face, staring at me with such passion, I could feel my throat hitch with unshed tears. He shook his head, though his eyes never left mine.
"She was never good enough. I thought maybe if I spent time with her, I'd forget what I'd felt for you all summer long. Yet, when my feelings for you never wavered…" he trailed off, words obviously failing him.
"But I thought you were leaving with her," I said, still unsure of it I could believe what he said.
"It doesn't matter. After what you told me, I don't think I could ever go anywhere with her again. I'd think of you every time I saw her, every time I closed my eyes."
I couldn't help it – I know I wouldn't have been able to stop myself no matter what had happened. I leaned forward and gave him a short peck on this lips before retreating back, biting my lower lip in a silent apology. I tugged at my hands, trying to pry them free from his grasp. But he held tight.
Then, he leaned in and kissed me – the way I had always dreamed of kissing him. I could feel my lips meld into his, my lips burning as the heat of his mingled with them. They burned, they were on fire.
And I loved it.
When he pulled away, his eyes were sparkling, his cheeks slightly flushed. He released my wrists and placed a hand on each of my cheeks. He breathed in a long, deep breath before he whispered, "I'm sorry for everything. If you'll have me, I promise, I'll never let you go."
I placed my hands on his cheeks, mimicking his action before smiling. All those months of pain, doubt and broken dreams had finally paid off, were finally turning around.
"I'll have you," I told him, "forever and always."
And with that, he leaned forward and kissed me again.
…