Hi! I know it's been over a month since I've added onto my other fanfics (Grimly Tales and AC Abridged), but don't worry, I'm still gonna work with them! I just thought of this story a while ago, and wanted to share it with you guys! So here you go! It's Cid and Shera's Wedding!
PART I: THE CEREMONY
Cid breathed deeply, trying to calm himself down before the big day. He drained his eighth cup of earl gray tea, and tossed the cup over his shoulder in frustration. The cup smashed against the side of Cloud's head, but is seemed that his Zapdos spike-of-a-haircut did more damage to the cup than the cup did to his head. "Ouch." Cloud muttered.
That's right! Cid and Shera were finally getting married! After months of Cid shouting insults and symbols at Shera's head, the tea-drinking pilot finally let his assistant in on his feelingson the Gold Saucer gondola- he wanted to marry her. And of course Shera agreed.
This was the greatest moment of Cid's life. He pushed his hair back out of his eyes, trying to not look so nervous. Just then, his best man, Vincent Valentine, came walking over. Vincent was in his old Turk suit, just just for the occasion. "Is something wrong, Cid?" he asked in his uber-emo, Steve Blum voice.
Cid looked up, and wiped away the sweat from his face. "What the (BEEP!) do you mean, Vince?! Everything's just dandy! I mean, (BEEP!)! I'm so nervous, Vincent! I mena, gosh, it's Shera and all-!"
"Don't have an ulcer," interrupted Vincent quickly. "You don't want to spaz out on the alter, do you?"
"(BEEP!) no, Vince! I mean- I need another earl gray!" Cid reached for the pot of tea that was on the concession table, but Vincent slapped his hand away. Turks style.
"What the (BEEP!), Vince?!" shouted Cid.
"You shouldn't get drunk just before your wedding!" growled his best man.
The groom gave him a strange look. "How do you get drunk on tea?"
"Believe me, you'd find a way." Vincent replied gravely. Turks style.
--
Meanwhile, the bride and her matron of honor were getting fluffed up before the ceremony. The bride, of course, was Shera, while her matron of honor was none other than Dr. Lucrecia Cresent. The bridesmaids, Tifa, Aerith and Yuffie, were next door with the flower girl, Marlene.
Shera sighed happily. "It's finally here. The big day."
Lucrecia nodded as she fixed the bow in Shera's hair. "I was nervous too on my own big day." she replied soothingly.
Shera raised her eyebrows. "You mean, you actually married that pychotic lunatic?"
"If you mean Hojo, of course not!" answered Lucrecia.
"Then what was 'the big day'?"
Lucrecia giggled. "Well, I guess it all started with Dr. Valentine. Oooh, they all laughed, but when we finally showsed them our thesis on-"
"OK, no talking about work today, alright?" grumbled Shera. She began to powder her face a deathly white.
Lucrecia sighed. "Oh, I'm so worried!"
Shera stopped her powdering in mid-puff. "About what?"
"Oh, err, the young girls here, naturally!" replied Lucrecia nervously, even though it was a complete lie. She was more worried about Vincent. Can she even have the guts to ask him to one itty-bitty dance? Can a matron of honor (she though she claimed that she hadn't married Hojo OO) and a best man have a special dance too?
"Yeah, you never know when an all-out catfight brawl will happen between Tifa and Aerith." said the bride, breaking into Lucrecia's daydreams.
--
In the room next door, tension was piling up faster than Cid's used earl greay teacups between Tifa and Aerith. They smiled their flakiest smiles and talked in a polite manner, but what were they really up to? Yuffie wasn't paying any attention to them or Marlene- she was reading Naruto manga instead.
"Oh, have you seen Cloud yet?" Tifa asked through her fake politeness.
Aha! Guy trouble. Typical.
"Tee hee hee! Of course I have!" giggled Aerith.
"When?" Tifa muttered through clenched teeth.
"Not telling!" came the UNsuper- nice response.
"Grrr!"
"Tee hee hee!"
Of course, both bridesmaids had one goal in common- to beat that boy-stealing hussy to Cloud! Tension, tension!
Just then, Jessie popped her head from around the door. "The ceremony's about to start!" she informed them, pretending to be oblivious to the electrical sparks firing from two of the rivalling bridesmaids's eyes. Jessie giggled.
Heh, if they keep this up, they'll be so distracted that I'LL be the one to dance with Cloud! the AVALANCHE member secretly told herself.
--
The original Final Fantasy song (the one that plays during the main menu of FFXII!- I think.) began to play softly in the background. It took the place of traditional weddign music. The slow tempo really set the mood, which was why Cid was so anxious. While the priest turned his head for half a nanosecond, Cid grabbed a flask from the inside of his tuxedo's pocket, and took a swig from it. Vincent glared at him, then concentrated on the aisle. His heart skipped a beat when he saw Lucrecia -the wonderful and poetic, marvelous Lucrecia- come up the aisle, followed by the three bridesmaids and Marlene, the cute little flower girl. For a mysterious second, Vincent though that HE was the one getting married, and nearly passed out.
The matron of honor and bridesmaids took their place on either side of the wedding aisle. Tifa, Marlene and Yuffie were on one side, while Aerith and Lucrecia were on the other. Aerith smiled sweetly, which annoyed Tifa all the way to Gongaga.
Who does she think she is?! Tifa screamed in her mind. Just because SOLDIER guys don't come crashing through my roof everyday, doesn't mean she can claim them all! Selfish b-
Vincent, however, nearly wet his swanky Turk pants when he saw how radiant and gorgeous Lucrecia was in her violet gown- at close range. His hands became clammy, so he tried to wipe them into his pants as sneakily as he could. He stopped in mid-wipe when Shera began her walk towards the wedding alter.
Cid nearly had an ulcer at the sight of Shera. She wore a stunning white gown, with a twenty-foot-long train decorated in chocobo feathers. Her viel (SP??) covered her face, which hopefully covered her eyesight as well, becuase then she wouldn't notice her future husband wringing his hands or see the dark spot forming in his tux's pants. OO
"Say good-bye to bachelorhood." taunted the priest, who was snickering at the groom for wetting himself.
"(BEEP!)! I love her, so shut up!" Cid snarled under his breath. The priest just shrugged. "Whatever you say." he replied.
--
Shera blushed as she took her place next to Cid. He was still cussing, even in a church. Oh well.
The priest coughed into his fist. "Okay then! Let's get this show on the road already!"
"About time," muttered Rufus Shinra, who'd crashed the wedding last minute with his trusty Turks posse. "I'm getting hungry! Where's my champagne!?"
"Sir," whispered Tseng to his boss. "The wedding hasn't even started yet! Then after the ceremony, there's going to be photographs taken; then speeches-"
"Screw the small stuff!" growled Rufus. "I better get a menu after this!"
Tseng sighed.
Two pews ahead of the Shin-Ra monopoly heir, sat a twitching Cloud. He wouldn't be here if his best friend Zack hadn't forced him to come. How can you have fun at such an uptight occasion? Especially with Tifa and Aerith both giving him the Evil Eye.
"Whatever you do, don't dance with Tifa!" Aerith had ordered him.
"Whatever you do, don't dance with Aerith!" Tifa had ordered him.
Cloud was in quite a gyshal pickle. if he danced with Aerith, then Tifa would give him a full round-a-house kick to the face. And if he danced with Tifa, then Aerith would strike him down with the merciless power of the Lifestream. And if her tried to ditch them both, then both would believe him to be dancing with the other, and he would recieve a double dose of their wrath! This wedding was turning out to be hellish.
Zack laughed and ruffled Cloud's spikey hair, which didn't help his dilemma. Hoo boy.
Meanwhile, on the alter, the priest purposely droned on and on about marriage and family and all that other boring junk. Cid was beginning to fidget, but tried not to display his impaitence to Shera. man, he just wanted to be married and get it over with. Drink a few beers with his best man, and go to the Gold Saucer with his newlywed wife for their honeymoon.
Fianlly, the priest finally reached the good part:
"Do you, Shera, take Cid Highwind to be your lawful wedded husband, in sickness and in health, 'til death do you part."
"I do." squeaked Shera.
Cid managed a smile.
The priest winked at the pilot, and asked him the same thing: "Do you, Cid Highwind, take Shera to be you lawful wedded wife-"
"What do you mean, 'awful wedded wife'?!" Cid snapped suddenly. Silence fell around the pews. "Shera's the most (BEEP!)ing beautiful woman out there, and you called her 'awful'?! Do you have a bone to pick you- (BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!)?!"
The crowd gasped. Shera blushed.
The priest cleared hsi throat impaitently. "Cid, I said 'lawful', with an L!"
"(BEEP!)!"
The priest rolled his eyes. "Whatever! Do you want to marry this woman or not?!"
"(BEEP!) yeah, I do!" Cid shouted.
The priest snapped his book shut. You got it, Highwind! I now pronounce you man and wife! Kiss the bride already!"
The crowd whooped and cheered as the newly Mr. Cid Hindwind and Mrs. Shera Highwind kissed. Rude was silently crying with a box of tissues in his hand.
"Now, where's my menu?!" Rufus demanded.
--
To Be Continued in Part II, The Dinner!