A/N: I'm currently watching season 4 and I'm just dying for Tony and Michelle to get back together, then I heard this song and fell in love with it. I think it totally fits their situation so I wrote this...it's between season 3 and season 4 but obviously season 4 would be different if this happened. Anyway review and tell me how it is!
Disclaimer: The characters belong to whoever it is that owns 24 (not me) and the song belongs to Secondhand Serenade
Tony Almeida scratched the side of his face, like he always did when he was unsure of himself. He could easily see the familiar form sitting under his favorite tree was shaking with sobs, and though he didn't know what was wrong, he certainly knew who it was. His "thinking tree" was three miles along a trail through the park near his and Michelle's old house, and the reason he loved it so much was because it reminded him of her. They had formed a Sunday-morning tradition of waking up, usually spending about an hour in bed, then jogging together to this place to just sit and talk. Through the drunken days and lonely nights after the divorce, these were some of his most treasured memories, but it took a forceful visit from Jack to convince him to drag himself off the couch and make the three-mile run there. As he tried to put his life back together, he made it a routine to jog here and sit under the tree just to think, since Michelle wasn't there to talk to. Both the jogging and the thinking was painful at first, but he slowly adjusted and found himself becoming more comfortable with both. This evening, though, he rounded the corner and stopped in his tracks when he saw his spot occupied. She didn't see him yet, and he was grateful, for he didn't know how to approach her. He longed to go and take her in his arms, hold her till she poured out everything on her mind, and he could assure her it would be all right. Not knowing how this would be received, he dropped his head and walked over slowly, seeing the shock register on her face when she looked up.
"Hey," he said softly, sitting and leaning against the trunk next to her.
Michelle just looked at him, and the deep sorrow in her eyes cut him to the heart. "Tony..."
Unsure what she was thinking, he said, "I know there must be something going on, for you to be sitting under this tree crying your eyes out...and if you want to talk, I'm here." With that, she leaned into him, and he just held her as she sobbed like her heart was breaking. Tony lost track of time as they sat that way, savoring every moment of having her in his arms again, trying not to think about where this might go from here.
As her sobs subsided, Michelle looked up and whispered, "Tony...Danny was in a car accident yesterday."
He felt his stomach clench in panic. Her brother had never been his favorite person, and the feeling was mutual, but Tony tolerated him because it was obvious how much Michelle loved him. If something happened to him..."Is he OK?"
"Yeah, he had surgery but he's going to be alright. Rachel and the kids are there now, and my parents." Relief flooded through his body, but he still didn't understand. She would certainly be upset after such a stressful time, but he knew she was a strong woman and wouldn't be sitting under their tree crying if there wasn't something else bothering her.
"And Chelle...are you OK?" He looked her straight in the eyes, and she knew he was trying to get to the root of her distress. She looked down and started to talk, not directly answering his question.
"When we were at the hospital waiting for him to get out of surgery...I couldn't stop shaking. I wanted to cry, but I need to be the strong one for my family. My mom, my dad, Danny's wife...I couldn't break down with any of them, they needed me to say everything would be OK."
He knew what she was trying to say, and it broke his heart. Since the days following their first kiss, he realized she leaned on him as much as he leaned on her - he was the only one she allowed herself to let go with, trusting him to handle her emotions and her tears. At the
hospital, without him there, she would have been composed and confident on the outside, while she was scared and sobbing on the inside. He pulled her close to him, allowing her to let out all that fear now, but still not sure how she felt about him. "Chelle, I'm so sorry you had to go through that alone." He picked his words carefully, not wanting to take advantage of her vulnerability.
"Tony...I've been thinking about us. I hate that I left you, but I couldn't just watch you drink your life away." Her voice was quivering.
He knew it wasn't the right time to try to convince her he had changed, so he apologized, "I pushed you away, baby, you did all you could do. I was so blinded by selfishness that I lost the only thing in my life worth living for."
Quietly, so he could barely hear her, she said, "I'm here now."
His breath caught in his throat. Could this be his chance to show her how hard he was trying? "Sweetheart, I think we need to talk."
"Can we go home?" she whispered uncertainly. After the divorce, Tony let her keep the house, and she hadn't sold it even during her brief stint in Seattle.
"Yeah, if you're sure," he said, struggling to keep his voice from cracking.
"Let's go," she said. She stood and pulled him up, then took off jogging along the trail. He paused for a minute to take it all in, then followed her, falling into the familiar rhythm of years ago.
The best part 'bout tonight is we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again, don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you's impossible to find
You're impossible to find.
Half an hour and almost four miles later, the pair arrived at Michelle's house - their house. Tony was breathing hard; obviously the year and a half he spent sitting on the couch, beer in hand, wasn't completely undone. They climbed the front steps and Tony instinctively reached for the spare key to unlock the door, since Michelle hadn't brought hers on her run. Realizing what he was doing as he put the key in the lock, he muttered an apology and stepped back to let Michelle do it - it was her house, after all. A strange, almost pained look crossed her face as she opened the door and they stepped into the house, memories flooding over both of them.
This was the house where they were so happy; lovestruck newlyweds just enjoying each other's company between long days at CTU. This was where Michelle hid away during the months Tony was in prison, not opening the blinds because the light was too cheerful. In this place they were reunited when Tony was released, convinced they would finally get their "happily ever after." And here, they were torn apart, constantly fighting, usually ending with Tony passed out and Michelle crying alone in their bedroom. Not a thing had changed since Tony left. The kitchen was untouched, and he cringed thinking of Michelle eating carry-out meals alone. Then his eyes wandered to the hall leading to their bedroom. Suddenly he was overwhelmed by what he had lost, falling to his knees by the living room couch. "Chelle...I'm so sorry. I was so wrong."
She heard the tears in his voice and went to him, sitting on the couch and wrapping her arms around him. "You weren't the only one, Tony. I promised to stick by you 'for better or for worse', and what I did was pretty much the opposite. You went to jail for me, and instead of helping you deal with the aftermath, I left when things got tough."
"I pushed you away, baby, because I was so ashamed of what I was becoming, I couldn't stand for the love of my life to see. I hated myself for hurting you, the one person I swore I never would. Then you left, and I knew I deserved it."
"I thought you hated me, Tony. You had a right to, I can't even imagine the things you endured in prison - for me," she whispered, tears slipping down her face.
"Oh, Michelle...look at me." He tilted her chin up so she could see the truth in his eyes. "I love you. I never stopped loving you, and I never will. I don't regret saving your life for a minute, because mine is worth nothing without you. And there's no way I could ever hate you - loving you is part of who I am." They were both crying now, the 18 months of loneliness and pain finally released. "I never meant to hurt you, but I knew I was and I didn't stop it. I was so weak - couldn't get a job, didn't have any money, couldn't even get off the couch anymore. I completely failed you, but I never stopped loving you.'
This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start
So hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again, don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day, I swear it's true
Because a girl like you's impossible to find
It's impossible
"I love you, Tony," Michelle cried. "I love you so much. Please stay here." She clung to him like a lifeline.
Tony thought he might be dreaming - a second chance was more than he could hope for. "Baby, say the word and I'll never leave you again. I'll never hurt you again, I promise."
"Stay," she cried into his chest. "I need you. Tony, I'm so sorry..."
"Shh," he said, "You have nothing to be sorry for. It's over now, I'm here."
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words,
'Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight,
When we're asleep
And tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again, don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day, I swear it's true
Because a girl like you's impossible to find
You're impossible to find
Please review!