Demonic and Divine
This is a Gabby drabble/fluff fic in Gibbs' POV. It was inspired by a passage at the end of My Name Is Asher Lev by Chaim Potok. Gibbs wonders about the two sides to everything in life; particularly his pending relationship with Abby, ergo, Gibbs POV. Please review!
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS, I just like taking the gang out to play my way sometimes. I don't own Asher Lev, either, but that doesn't matter because nothing here is plagiarized. I don't own JAG either, though I only mention it and Admiral Chegwidden once.
Demonic and Divine
Love was both demonic and divine. I had to trust others about the latter, since all I had ever experienced of love had come to a tragic end. Not that I'm bitter about it. No, on the contrary, I supposed that fate was saving the best for last. The best, I was convinced, was Abby.
Abby herself could be both demonic and divine. Demonic in the way her hips swayed when she walked. The way she laughed and the emotion glittered in her eyes. The way she could make any man crazy with a few choice words. Divine in the way that all of the things above could make a man who hadn't felt warmth in years, a man such as myself, feel love and joy again.
I juxtaposed my feelings for Abby and found that though divine far outweighed demonic, there was something sinful about my sentiments. In the yin and yang of our prophetical relationship I could only see the divine, though. The demonic is forced out of existence save for the occasional flicker of the flame of pure lust she makes me feel. After all, one cannot exist without the other, like I can't exist without Abby. It's the perfect imbalance. It has leveled my turbulent love life. It has helped me reach a dynamic equilibrium.
Now, if only I could find it in myself to tell her.
Ours are two completely different worlds contained within one universe.
Still, we are only human. We are primitive souls with primitive needs like those for love and approval, for validation. Oh, the divinity and demonism of it all.
I shook my head to help snap me out of my reverie and stood up from my desk. I decided to go see how Abby was doing in the lab. It was just a platonic visit. Yeah, that's it, platonic.
Trouble is, my feelings are anything but platonic. I sighed as I headed for the elevator, my heart racing. It's a feeling I don't usually get. Not even when I'm faced with a terrorist pointing a gun at me.
Then again, isn't life measured not by the number of breaths we take, but by the number of moments that take our breath away? If that was the case then my life is priceless. Every time I see Abby my breath is forced from my lungs and a warm, unmistakable feeling settles in the pit of my stomach.
I stepped off of the elevator and into the corridor down to Abby's lab. The moment I entered the lab I was hit with a sound blast. Abby's music was blaring as she typed with a vengeance. I smiled inwardly. The whole scene was typically Abby. I walked up behind her and put a hand lightly on her shoulder. She practically jumped out of her boots.
"Jesus, Gibbs! You scared the hell out of me!" Abby exclaimed.
"Sorry," I said lightly.
"What did you need?" Abby asked.
"Did you run the carbon-14 on that skeleton we found in the park?" I asked nonchalantly.
"Almost finished," Abby replied. "I'll let you know as soon as I'm done."
"You don't have to rush," I amended, "I'm not in a hurry."
Abby regarded me through curious eyes. They shone with the reflection of the overhead lights. I quirked an eyebrow and she slowly lowered her guard. Abby was the one woman I could never figure out. Some people might be inclined to disagree. After all; a man with three ex wives looked pretty clueless. It wasn't about reading them, though. I had been an interrogator long enough to know exactly what was going on in any given person's head. Abby however, was a whole other story. She was a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in white velvet flesh. She was a truly preternatural woman and I loved it. She could draw me out of my forlorn spell on any given day with a simple smile. After a few seconds of enduring my scrutiny, Abby sighed exasperatedly and decided to initiate a conversation instead.
"Gee, Gibbs, you're certainly quiet today," Abby commented lamely.
"There's nothing that has to be said," I lied.
There was plenty to be said. Of course, I couldn't exactly become hypocritical by admitting to Abby that I wanted a relationship within the workplace. I would have to resign if Kate ever found out, considering I told her not to pull that crap with me. I rubbed a frustrated hand over my eyes. My rational side was winning over my passionate side, as usual. This is exactly why I can never hold a successful relationship. My brain has power over my heart. My common sense overpowers my passion. It was one of my own personal seven. Common sense was a sin. It was my demonic.
"How's the boat coming along?" Abby asked.
"Slowly," I replied, "no time to work on it with cases coming in left, right and centre."
"No kidding, I barely even had time to eat during our last case," Abby stated.
"In that case, why don't you finish up the carbon-14 and go home? Get some rest," I suggested.
"Nah, I'm fine here. I've still got a bunch of new software I need to install on this computer and then I have to run a bunch of tests for Ducky," Abby said.
The whole situation was becoming cinematic. It was like one of those cheesy romantic comedies where the guy likes the girl but she's clueless and he can't say anything because he gets sick thinking about her rejection. Still, with that came a glimmer of hope. Those movies usually ended with the guy and girl finding each other and falling madly in love.
'Snap out of it, Gibbs. You're going crazy,' I thought to myself.
Abby stared at me blankly before turning away and facing the computer again. I stood there and stared at her in silence. She typed with fervor and I wondered what it would be like if some of that passion could be channeled into a kiss. There was only one way to let her know how I felt. I sighed before putting my hands on the back of her chair and spinning her around to face me once again. She looked momentarily startled as I leaned closer and trapped her in the chair, my arms resting on the armrests. I closed my eyes and felt the electricity surge through my body as my lips met hers.
At first, the kiss was tentative. I could taste the mingled fear and desire on Abby's lips. However, before long Abby kissed me back with equal passion. I brought my hand up to Abby's face and brushed my thumb over her cheek. My tongue traced her lips and she moaned pleasurably. We kissed for another minute before pulling apart breathlessly. My heart raced and I felt like I had just run eight miles uphill. I sighed contently and opened my eyes. Abby's eyelids slowly fluttered open, as well. I could see the fulfillment shining in her eyes as much as I could feel it deep inside my own soul. I gripped her hand tightly and squeezed it reassuringly. Abby took a calming breath and looked at me.
"Wow, Gibbs. That was just… Wow," she said breathlessly.
I smiled and placed a light kiss on her forehead.
"Speechless, Abby? I never thought I could make you speechless," I said lightly.
Abby mirrored my smile with a coy one of her own. She slipped her hand from my grasp and wrapped her arms around my waist. I snaked one arm around to her back and ran my free hand through her hair. The strands were like a tangle of black silk slipping between my fingers. There was something decidedly sexy about the way Abby ran her hands down my back. I shivered at her touch and kissed the top of her head.
"Is your offer of letting me off work early still open?" Abby asked.
"Yeah," I replied lightly.
"Then I'm going to take you up on that, but only if you come with me," Abby agreed.
I smiled and hugged her closer to me. We separated reluctantly and Abby got all of her things together.
"I'll go and get my things and then we can get out of here. Meet me in the lobby in five minutes," I instructed.
Abby nodded briskly and I turned to leave the lab. I turned to look at her one last time and she winked at me happily. I ran up the staircase to the bullpen and quickly packed up my belongings. I left notes on Kate and Tony's computers.
Gone to JAG HQ to meet with Admiral Chegwidden. You can have the rest of the day off. See you tomorrow. –Gibbs.
It was just a little white lie. After all, what Kate and DiNozzo didn't know couldn't hurt them. I grabbed my briefcase and headed down to the lobby. Abby stood by the windows at the front of the building, waiting for me. We were about to step outside when I saw Kate and Tony heading our way, bantering as usual. I pulled Abby behind the nearest plant with me as we waited for them to head upstairs. The wait for the elevator seemed unbearably long with Abby in such close proximity. I kissed her quickly but fervently and when we separated the door to the elevator was shut and Kate and Tony were on their way up to the bullpen. Hand in hand, Abby and I quickly ran out to the parking lost and made a mad dash for my car.
This was the demonic part of the relationship that I so enjoyed. The running and hiding part of the relationship. It was fun doing it behind everyone's backs. The thrill of getting caught just made it more worthwhile. I knew Abby felt the same way.
We drove to my house in a companionable silence. Once we got inside, Abby and I headed straight for the kitchen. I pulled two bottles of raspberry cooler out of the fridge. We went back outside and sat on the porch swing, hidden from the afternoon sun. Abby leaned against me and laid her head on my chest. I wrapped an arm around her waist and held her close to me.
"So Gibbs, where does this leave us?" Abby asked.
Us. I liked the way the word sounded as it rolled off of her tongue. I took a long swig of my cooler and smiled.
"Right where we want it to. I love you, Abbs," I said sincerely.
Her hand gripped my thigh and she snuggled more closely against my torso.
"I love you too, Gibbs," she replied with equal sincerity.
I put my drink down and gently tipped Abby's chin up towards me. I leaned in and covered her mouth with mine. This time our kiss was slower, gentler than the last. It was a kiss of promise, the seal on a pact that was never to be broken. Intuition told me that I would never have to worry about my common sense outweighing my passion again. Abby would keep me grounded. I wouldn't hurt her like I had hurt the others. I made myself promise that I would keep Abby around through thick and thin.
A chilling late-summer breeze began to set in and I felt Abby shiver. I pulled her closer to me as I sat up. Wrapping my arms around her shoulders I left a trail of butterfly kisses from her shoulder up to her mouth. We kissed briefly before heading inside to sit on the couch, away from the cold.
We watched the fire flicker in the hearth as we sat on the couch in a comfortable silence. I kissed Abby again and smiled in spite of myself.
I had finally found the perfect balance between the demonic and the divine.
A.N.: This was written especially for all of you Gabby fans out there! For Jennifer Paris Morgan; thanks for believing in me! Tell me what you guys think, please review! -Julia-