Guys I'm going to warn you now all these things I'm going to be posting will all be mainly for SkyGem since my wife JUST LOVES GIVING US PROMPTS THAT WE HAVE TO DO! Well this prompt was periods and what the males of KHR would do if they were sent out to get tampons/pads.
I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
The Arcobaleno were all very worried about their female member's well beings. Lal had been in the bathroom for maybe two hours taking a bath, something none of them had ever expected from Lal since she hated baths, Yuni was looking through the pantries shouting about food that they didn't have and every now and again they could hear a blood curtailing shriek from Vipers bedroom.
"This is way too weird; they've all been moody for the past two days! First Yuni locked herself in her room for a whole day, then Lal actually wanted to do some cute couple stuff with Colonnello, and now Viper won't stop screaming! What is going on?" Skull asked the others. It was way too out of character for the three of them to be doing any of this!
Reborn put in his two scents. "I asked Yuni if she would be making any cookies since we were out and no one else knew how to make Luce's cookies and she nearly stabbed me with a fork." He told them.
Fon, who was coming in from the kitchen with a cup of tea that would helpfully sooth whatever was wrong with Viper, sighed. "Viper was talking to me earlier." He added in.
"Isn't that a good thing though? Don't you have this major crush on her?" Skull asked. He was pretty sure Viper talking to Fon was a good thing.
"Usually it would be, but it just didn't feel right. She was too…nice…" Fon said.
Colonnello and Verde seemed to be the only ones who knew what was going on with the girls since they weren't saying anything about the women's drastic changes.
Finally Skull turned to Colonnello. "You and big sis share a bed, what's wrong with her?" He asked almost desperately.
Colonnello didn't even look up from the report that he was doing for Lal. "Do you want an excuse or do you want the real reason, kora?" He asked idly.
Verde, whose eyes were, glued to his laptop snorted, "They won't figure it out unless you tell them straight out." He told the blond.
"Wait, so you two know and you aren't telling us?" Reborn asked looking at the two.
They only nodded and went back to their work.
"Tell us!" The three shouted; they needed to know what was up with them.
Verde sighed and closed his laptop. "They're all on their periods, does that explain it?" He asked dryly.
The three paled noticeably, they've seen the damage that Chrome could do when she's on her period but this was oddly the first time they've seen Yuni, Lal, and Viper on theirs.
The slamming of doors caught all of their attention and an angry shout of "COLONNELLO!" made the five men cringe.
Colonnello, the brave soldier that he was, put the folder down on the coffee table and stood up to go see what his wife needed. "What is it honey?" He asked making sure not to say 'kora' in front of her. He knew how much it annoyed her at a time like this.
Lal was sitting in the middle of their bedroom wrapped up in an extra-long towel with an empty box in front of her. She held out the box to him and he just knew he was going to have to do the one thing he didn't ever want to do. "We're out." She said simply.
Colonnello held back a groan, he knew better than to mess with her right now. "I'll go get more." He said grabbing his car keys off of the dresser.
"Get me some red velvet cupcakes while you're at it!" She shouted down the hall.
He made a noise to say that he heard her and was stopped in his tracks when he passed Viper's room.
"Are you going to the store?" She asked immediately.
"What do you need?" He asked.
"Pain killers, strawberry ice cream, strawberries, and get me the cheesiest romantic book that you can find." Viper told him.
Colonnello nodded. "Call me if you think of anything else." He said. When he was in the military with Lal he would do this sort of thing for her all the time so it was perfectly normal for him to do this sort of thing.
"…Thank you…" Viper said before slamming the door to her bedroom shut again and crawling back into her plush bed.
Next Colonnello went to Yuni, who was craving things that they didn't have and needed to get so that she would be happy. An angry Yuni was not something any of them wanted. He found her searching through the pantry.
"I'm going to the store, what do you need?" He asked patiently. He learned very well to be patient with a woman at this time of the month or he would get hit, even by the nicest of the girls.
Yuni turned to him with a sharp look in her eyes. "I need biscotti, evushagadil, albicocche, and baba al rum…and get me something from that one bakery that we went to for Viper's birthday cake." She said without hesitation. "And I need pomegranate ice cream."
Colonnello nodded and kissed the top of her head. "I'll be back as soon as I can." He told her.
Yuni grinned at him brightly and decided that she would make coffee; yeah coffee would totally be good right now, she thought to herself as she looked through the cabinets for the coffee grinds and the espresso pot.
He walked past the others casually, who were all staring awe struck at the blond. He grabbed his coat off of the couch and looked at them in confusion. "What?" He asked.
"How the hell did you handle all of them and why are you just now doing it?" Reborn asked.
Colonnello shrugged. "I dealt with this all the time in the military; Lal would give us a week off because she was always in too much pain to order us around so I sort of ended up taking care of her. I don't mind doing it for the others." He checked to see that he had everything he would need and then left to go to the grocery store.
The trip to the grocery store was short; they lived close by to the store since Yuni thought it would be a good idea if they did. The trouble was looking for the brand of tampons that wouldn't get him killed, Lal tended to change her mind about what kind she wanted depending on how bad it was that month. From what he knew this month wasn't really that horrid…but then again the other two may be having a bad week and therefor he probably should get some that would suit all of the girls…and not to mention he needed to get Varia Quality pain relievers for Viper or she would have his head on a silver platter. If anything Yuni was the easiest person that he needed to shop for, all she wanted was food.
There was a sigh from next to him and Colonnello found himself face to face with a very confused looking Mukuro.
"Chrome," Colonnello asked, to which he got a nod.
"This is the first time I got sent for this type of thing. Ken and Chikusa fled the area two weeks ago in anticipation for this." Mukuro said grimly looking at the various brands. "Usually the others get stuck with this but she caught me off guard with this one."
"You know you can just call her and ask her what she needs kora." Colonnello said like it was the simplest thing in the world.
Mukuro looked like he didn't want to do that at all. "She can sense fear." He said darkly.
Colonnello rolled his eyes and took out his phone. Luckily he had Chrome's phone number. "I'll call her," He said pressing her number on his speed dial.
"Hello?" She asked tiredly.
"What do you need? Mukuro forgot his phone in the car so he asked me to call." He said as nicely as possible. She was Varia Quality just like Viper so he had to be as careful as possible while talking to the two of them.
Chrome gladly told him what he needed and then proceeded to give them to Mukuro. "Thank you very much Chrome." He said pleasantly before they hung up. "Get her some chocolate as well she would love it."
Mukuro looked at him like he was a miracle worker. "How do you do that?" He asked.
"I live with three women; I've learned a few things." With that Colonnello left to get the rest of the things that were needed and went to the check out. All he needed to do now was to go to La Dolceroma's for Yuni and he would be able to go home. He got a little something extra for Viper since she was in pain; he got her a large stuffed frog.
La Dolceroma was the Arcobaleno's favorite bakery, Austrian owned but still some very good pastries. They've been going there since Luce had decided they needed to get out more and have been coming back ever since. He got Yuni's favorite cakes and then happily went home.
The house was in total chaos when he got home, Viper was strangling Skull with her illusions, Yuni was shouting about a cup missing, and Lal was casually sitting on the couch watching a movie. "I got the things!" He exclaimed hoping that it would calm everything down. He held the bags out in victory and put them on the coffee table.
"Thanks blondie." Viper said taking her things. "Did you get me a frog?" She asked. She was pretty sure that she didn't tell him she wanted a stuffed frog. Of course she had a million but this one was wearing a robe and was wearing a cute little crown and she didn't have one like that.
Colonnello shrugged, "Someone was selling them near the bakery and they said it was the only one they had and I figured you would be pissed if I didn't get it for you."
A smirk played across Viper's plump lips and for once she let down her hood to show her ever changing eyes. "Thanks soldier." She said hugging the frog to her chest. She took her things and once again disappeared into her bedroom.
"Here are your sweets princess, that cup you're looking for is behind the tea pot," Colonnello said.
Yuni smiled that beautiful little grin of hers and kissed his cheek before running off to the kitchen.
"Did you get my cupcakes?" Lal questioned.
Colonnello handed her the box of cupcakes and kissed her. "For you my love," He said giving her a smile he knew that she couldn't resist.
"Thank you." Lal said taking one of the cupcakes.
"It wasn't a problem." Colonnello said leaning back into the couch with his arm around her.
Fon came back inside the house and was pleasantly surprised to see that everything was calmed down. "You did very well Colonnello." He whispered as he passed by.
So there you have it my love, I hoped you like it. I don't really know what I was thinking when I was writing this but all I really know is that I wanted Colonnello to somehow be the good guy. And if you're wondering why Reborn is missing at the end of this story I suspect that it's because he didn't want to deal with the girls and just left.
I'm currently working on your birthday present so look out for that.
If any of you are wondering about the things that Yuni asked for, well I don't really know either I just looked up things on Google...