Jay's sleeping form turned over and went to wrap his arms around her waist only to be met with an empty side of the bed. The past month had been filled with happy dreams only to be met with the harsh reality of the world. She had been sleeping on the other side of his bed for 3 months until she stopped coming over. They went from talking every day all day, to talking a couple days a week. He was busy with his job, and she was busy with hers. Sometimes their work interfered with one another, but never enough for a conversation as to why.
He finished his residency at the hospital a month into their relationship, if you could call it that. She had been promoted from officer to detective at the precinct. Their careers had taken off; their love lives not so much. All Jay could think of was how much he missed her.
The way her hair fell over his grey pillowcase. The way her skin smelled after a couple beers and great sex. It was something he couldn't forget. But obviously she could drop it like it was nothing. He cared about her, but unfortunately she didn't feel the same.
His alarm clock sounded and he peeled the covers off his body and hopped in the shower. He rinsed off his dreams and memories and changed into his scrubs. He might as well erase her from his memory. She's never coming back. He grabbed a mug of coffee and left his apartment. Work is always a good distraction.
He rounded through different patient rooms with the residents and interns below him. "Report?" He announced.
"Hank Voight," Jay lifted his head, his eyes moved from his clipboard to the man laying on the bed. "58 year old male, cop, came in last night after a bust went bad. He was shot in the chest twice, bullets missed all major vessels; however, one nicked the apex of his left lung. He came in with difficulty breathing and in and out of consciousness, which makes us suspect a concussion. He's 4 hours post-op to repair his left lung," the resident rattled off.
Jay still stood shocked. He and Hank Voight had never met. But this was the man Erin Lindsay spoke so highly of. This was the man who had promoted her to detective. This was the man who told her to stay focused on her career. He took in a deep breath, thankful that she wasn't sitting in here with him.
"When can I get out of here," the man in the bed asked.
"Sir, I'm Dr. Halstead. I'm your doctor. You were pretty badly injured last night when you came in. So, it's going to be a couple weeks before you get out of here. You are on strict bed rest until your lung has healed enough to handle the exertion of walking. If you need anything press this button and the nurse will answer it," Jay said. He followed the residents out the door. He came to abrupt stop when he saw Erin hanging outside the door. Dried tears caked her face. Dark circles hung below her eyes. A coffee held between both her hands.
"Is he okay?" Her voice wavered. Jay nodded slowly.
"He stats look good, for what his body went through. He should be fine," Jay read off robotically.
"Don't bullshit me Jay. How is he?" Jay watched as Erin became angrier.
"I'm not bullshitting you Erin. He has a little damage to his upper left lung, and the bullet wounds. But other than that he's fine. The bullets missed everything important in his chest. He's a lucky man," Jay explained. "If you need anything give me a call," Jay walked away and followed his residents into the next room. Erin walked into Hanks.
XXX
Jay's day had been hectic. He had an emergency surgery right after his rounds in the morning. His day began to slow up and he walked the halls of his floor to check in on his patients. Dreading to open the door in front of him, he took a deep breath and walked through the doorway. His patient sleeping in the bed and his family, or is it daughter, or maybe coworker. At this point Jay had no idea how to describe her relationship with Voight. She never described it either.
"He feels fine. He just wants to get out of here," Erin whispered from her seat.
"I was just checking, you know doing my job. When was the last time you slept?" Jay asked sitting in the chair next to her.
"Well I've been working all day, then undercover most nights the past two weeks. So I'm going to go with a month, maybe," Erin offered.
"You should go home. Sleep, I'll call you if there's any changes," Jay suggested.
"I haven't been able to go home in a couple weeks. Part of the job, you know? I've been living with Voight," she grabbed his hand.
"My shift is over in an hour, come home with me and sleep. I hate seeing you like this," Jay took her other hand and squeezed it.
"I can't Jay," Erin began to tear up. "There's this big mess with my undercover work, hence the reason I've been with Voight. I can't put you in danger like that," she removed the hand from Voight's and wiped her tears.
"Well I'm not taking no for an answer. You're wearing yourself thin, and I'm taking a stand. You're sleeping at my place tonight," Jay demanded.
"Fine."
"I'll be back when my shift is over," Jay released her hand and stood to leave.
"Jay?" Erin barely squeaked out before Jay left the room. He turned around, eyebrows raised, waiting for her to continue. "Thanks for this," she smiled slightly.
"No problem," Jay returned the smile and left the room to continue finishing his shift.
45 minutes later he walked into the room, Erin napping in the small chair and his patient awake.
"So, you're Jay aren't you?" Hank asked.
"Excuse me?" Jay stood shocked.
"You're the kid Erin couldn't stop talking about. She fought me so hard on this undercover job. Said something about a new relationship she needed to work on before she went under. I convinced her to go under, and she hasn't slept in a month," Voight continued.
"I'm Jay," Jay smiled. Knowing she went undercover instead of cutting him off was a small relief. "I'm going to take her back to my place so she can sleep. I'm off tomorrow so I'll drive her back in to see you," Jay explained.
"Take good care of her Jay," Hank instructed and went back to sleep.
"Erin," Jay softly shook her shoulder. "Let's head out of here," she nodded and slowly stood.
"How long was I asleep?" She asked as they walked in the direction of his car.
"Less than 45 minutes," he laughed.
"God, I'm so tired," she leaned on Jay and allowed him to support some of her weight. He opened the car door and allowed for her to get in. He rounded the car and got in the drivers seat and began to drive to his apartment. As he drove Erin's eyelids slowly began to close. Soon she was asleep. He parked his car in the underground lot. The opening of the passenger side door was enough to stir Erin from her sleep. "Already?" She questioned as her eyes stayed close. "My eyes won't open."
"I'll carry you," Jay lifted her from the car and over to the elevators. She nuzzled her head in his chest and wrapped her arms around his neck.
"You're a good guy Jay," she mumbled into his shirt. "I'm sorry about not telling you about the undercover."
"Shhh, just go back to sleep," he encouraged. She obliged, eyes closing and leaning more into him. He unlocked his door and pushed it open. Locking the door and deadbolt before he placed Erin in the empty space on his bed. He released his arms from under her. He began to walk away, when there was a tug on his arm.
"Stay. I sleep better when you're next to me," Erin confessed sleepily. Jay nodded and climbed over her onto the bed. He lay flat and stared at the ceiling. Not quite sure what Erin meant when she said next to me. She flipped over onto her side and curled into his chest. He looked down and was met with her beautiful hazel eyes. He then realized she was wearing her jeans and a t-shirt.
"Do you want to change? I've got some sweats and a t-shirt you can borrow. She shook her head.
"No," she shimmied out of her jeans and pulled her bra off under her t-shirt. "I'm okay now," she returned to his chest.
"Okay, I'm going to change out of my scrubs," he untangled himself and stripped down to his boxers.
"Hurry up Jay, I just want to sleep," Erin pleaded.
"I'm just going to put some shorts on," he walked over to his dresser.
"Forget the stupid shorts. Just get your ass over here," she complained and he complied. She snuggled back into his bare chest. "I missed this," Erin sighed contently.
"Me too. I haven't slept well since you left," he admitted. "Is the undercover the only reason you left?" He asked curiously. He felt her nod.
"These guys are careful, and dangerous. I didn't want you to get hurt. I would've rather me be heart broken then you get physically hurt. So I cut you off. I'm sorry," a tear fell onto his chest. He leaned forward and kissed her head. He tilted her head up to look at him and leaned in to kiss her.
"I've wanted to do that for over a month," he smiled.
"Me too," she laughed.
"So you were heart broken?" Jay questioned.
"I was heart broken. You can ask Hank. You have continuously been on my mind every day. I miss you," she explained.
"I talked to Hank., while you were sleeping in the chair. He said you begged him not to make you go undercover," he rubbed small circles on her t-shirt covered back.
"Begged is a strong word. It was more of plea, like I don't want to but I if I have to," she placed a kiss to his chest. He let out a chuckle that made his chest rise and her head bob up and down.
"I missed you too by the way. Your skin, your smell, your laugh, and that voice, I missed it all. And I'm so glad it's back," he pulled her head closer and kissed her softly. Lips fused for an unknown period of time. She released coming up for a breath of air. She sat up slowly. "Er, come back," Jay tugged at her shirt. She grabbed his hand and guided it up, forcing the t-shirt to ride up past her belly button. She nodded and allowed him to take it off of her completely. The shirt was completely forgotten as he threw it on the floor.
"Only fair right?" She laughed as she lay back down. Jay felt her breasts brush against his chest. He tensed. "What?"
"What What?" he asked.
"What, why did you tense," she questioned.
"Because you're naked, and you need sleep," he explained.
"Why? I can sleep later," she pushed closer to him. Her hand rubbing up and down his chest.
"You're extremely sleep deprived. Go to sleep," he demanded. He felt her hand stop and he settled a little. She turned over and faced the door.
"Fine," she sighed. He looked over and saw her bare back, and her hair fell against his grey pillowcase. He brushed her hair closer to her head and wrapped an arm around her waist.
"It's not that I don't want to have mind blowing sex with you," Erin huffed. "Its just you've been through a lot today, and yesterday, and the past month. I just want you to get a good night's sleep," he all but pleaded. She nodded her head and placed her arm on his.
"Tell me he's going to be okay," she requested.
"He'll be okay. He'll be back to the badass boss you know him to be in no time," he smiled and kissed the back of her head. "Good night."
"Good night," she smiled and fell into a deep sleep.
XXX
Jay woke with Erin in his arms for the first time in a month and he couldn't feel happier. He untangled himself and walked into the kitchen. He figured when she woke she'd at least want coffee and breakfast. He began brewing coffee and started mixing the pancake batter. He grabbed a mug of coffee and poured himself a cup. He sipped the coffee. Just as he was going to pour himself another cup she tugged the mug out of his hands only to find it empty.
"It's empty," she announced.
"I know, I just finished it, I was going to pour another before you took it out of my hands," he laughed.
"Fine, I'll make my own coffee," she sighed and pulled a mug out of the cabinet and poured herself a cup.
"Pancakes?" Jay said as he began scooping batter into the pan.
"Well you're already making them," she laughed.
"These are for me," he pointed to the pancakes on the pan. "Yours are coming next. I've been up waiting to start breakfast. I get to eat first," he laughed.
"Well aren't you just the gentleman," she smiled and sat down at the kitchen island.
"You look better today," he observed.
"I feel better today. Plus I got the added bonus of sleeping next to you last night," she smiled.
"Touché," he laughed and handed her the first plate of pancakes. "Eat up," he smiled and handed her a fork. She took a bite.
"These are really good," she said as she put another bite into her mouth.
"Halstead famous recipe," he began to eat some of his own. "You're only going to have one cup of coffee?" He observed.
"Yeah, I'm trying to get off my huge caffeine addiction," she laughed.
"Not possible, I've been trying for years," he smiled. "Good morning," he leaned over and kissed her.
"Good morning," she smiled back.
"You ready to see Voight?" He asked as he began cleaning up the dishes.
"Yeah, let me put my clothes back on," he nodded his head and she left to get dressed. He finished the dishes and walked into his room to get changed. He put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt as he saw Erin walk out of the bathroom.
"You used my toothbrush didn't you?" She nodded her head and laughed.
"Wouldn't want to walk in that hospital with bad breath," she continued on towards the door. "Are you coming?" She yelled into the apartment. Jay followed her voice to the front door.
"I was just getting socks," he laughed as he put on his shoes and grabbed his wallet and keys.
"The sooner we get to the hospital the sooner I can get back to sleep," she laughed as they rode the elevator down.
"You're going to go back to sleep," Jay frowned.
"You had your chance Dr. Halstead, you blew it," she explained.
"Oh so that's how it is huh?" He reached towards her and grabbed her waist and tickled her until she couldn't breathe.
"Stop Jay, it's a joke," she said once she caught her breath and the elevator door opened. He pulled her hand into his and walked towards his car. They sat in a comfortable silence as they drove to the hospital. He led her through the hallways up to Hank's room.
"Ahhh, there she is," Hank smiled as Erin entered the room. "You're looking much better," Hank laughed.
"I feel much better," she laughed.
"I'm going to go get some coffee, any one want some?" Jay asked. Erin shook her head. "Are you sure? It's from the doctor's lounge, not the shitty stuff down stairs," he persuaded.
"No I already had my cup for the day, I'm good," she smiled.
"Okay then, you're missing out," he laughed and walked out of the room leaving Erin and Hank alone.
"You need to tell him," Hank muttered.
"I told you I'd tell him, I just haven't gotten around to it," she looked down.
"You slept in his bed last night, and you didn't tell him, it was fine when you weren't seeing him every night, but you were with him for over 12 hours. He needs to know," Hank scolded.
"Can we just drop it?" She suggested.
"Fine, only if you promise," Hank stared her down.
"Promise what?" Jay asked as he walked in the door.
"Promise that I'll be careful while outside," she smiled. She stood and walked over to Jay and took his cup of coffee in her hand.
"You said you didn't want any," he frowned.
"I don't, I just can't smell it from over there," she wafted the coffee into her face. "That smells delicious."
"It is delicious, but it's mine," Jay grabbed it out of her hand. "Mine," he took a sip of his coffee.
"Okay, so we came, we saw you're alive and well. Now we're going to head out," Erin winked towards Voight and stepped out of the door.
"Thanks Jay. For everything," Hank declared.
"I'd do anything for her," Jay declared and followed Erin out the door. They went out to the car and Jay began to drive back to his apartment. He parked and they rode the elevator up. They stepped into his apartment. Erin leaned forward and captured his lips in a kiss, soft and slow at first. As their needs grew the speed intensified. She reached down and lifted his shirt over his head. Immediately replacing her lips on his.
"You're sure about this?" He asked as she took off her shirt too. She nodded.
"I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life," he pulled her close and walked her back towards the bedroom.
XXX
"I have to tell you something," Erin spoke after minutes of silence. Her and Jay lay naked in his bed, catching their breath. She was on her back looking up at the ceiling.
"What?" Jay wondered as he brushed a stray hair out of her face.
"We, um…" Erin turned on her side to look him in the eyes. "Halfway through this undercover mission Voight pulled me out. I didn't know how to reach out to you without feeling like a complete bitch for ditching you. I've been living at Voight's for the last month and a half," she briefly explained.
"So you haven't been undercover this entire time?" He asked shocked. She shook her head.
"No the second I found out, Hank pulled me from the case," she confessed.
"Found what out?" Jay asked confused.
"Jay, I'm pregnant," she announced.
"Um, really?" He asked. She nodded her head and looked down. "How far along?"
"10 weeks."
"We're having a baby?" Jay slightly smiled.
"I'm having a baby, yes. If you don't want to be involved, I won't hold it against you."
"We're having a baby!" Jay exclaimed as he pulled her close and kissed her. His hands went from her back, around to rest on her flat stomach. "Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss any of this," he added.
"So we're doing this?" She questioned.
"We're doing this."