So to begin, yes I have been lacking in my other stories. Here is my reason, I've been writing this story for the past 3 mouths and haven't been able to focus on anything else. I was reading some other fan fiction about Rose and Dimitri having children and I wasn't that happy with it. I don't think Dimitri would ever abounded Rose nor would Rose not tell Dimitri that she was pregnant. I think Rose has more respect for her mentor then what those stories lead on to be. Not to hate on them since I love some of them, I just don't agree. And, it bothered me that some people didn't know what they were talking about. There is a saying called "write what you know." If you lack knowledge in a subject but you want to write about, please go read up on it. Now, I am not saying I'm perfect but I do have more in sight on pregnancy then most. First off, being pregnant is like holding a grocery bag. You know what you are holding because you are feeling it. Being pregnant is the same way. You can feel when a child is in you. I know this because I have known several pregnant women in my life and they say the exact same thing. There is one part in the story where Rose grabs her child's foot through her belly. Yes this is possible, I use to do it all the time when my mother was pregnant with my brother. It's also normal to have a little period when you a pregnant, you're body is still getting use to the idea of being pregnant. And, even though I haven't been through it, birth hurts. I try my best to explain it in my own context and I hope I get my point across.
So now that I explained a few things I wanted to give a huge thanks to people who have been supporting me. People who have contacted me to see if I am okay, to all those who reviewed, Favorited and followed - you are the reason why I wrote this. That and I wanted some Rose and Dimitri fluff without drama. I honestly think these two are the funniest people together. I think some fan fictions don't get that point across, these two people are the lest cheesy people I have ever read. They are also more realistic. Rose and Dimitri are not about sex and cuddling, they are about just being close to one another. That's love. Just wanting to be near each other. That's what I love about these two, they just want to be near each other and make each other laugh. Not only are they best friends but they support each other no matter what. I love playing around with them because they give me hope and I hope y'all understand that.
We are built on love. We crave it. As humans - dhampires and Moroi included - we just want to be loved. That's the base of everything. We fight for it, we deny it, and most of all we hate it. When reading the VA books, I wanted to kick Rose thinking she could make it through life without loving someone. If you think you can do t hat, then you are stupid because we are a species that need to be together. I think Rose and Dimitri are one of the best interpretations of that. They grow to realize that no, they do love each other and why should they have to deny it. If you love someone then damn it you let them know because life is too short. I mean, that's the truth. Life is built on love. People come and go. That's one thing that bothers me about VA, R.M. tells us about how two best friends that would never leave each others side. Now, yes there are people out there that stick with each other, but it just seems unrealistic.
People come and then they go. They lead you down a path so you go on with your life. I think Rose depend on Lissa for the first 17 years of her life. I think Lissa did too. They were companions. But when other people - Christian and Dimitei - came into their lives, they stopped being companions. Lissa doesn't need Rose anymore like how Rose doesn't need Lissa. But they stick by each other. And I think, eventually, their friendship will fade over the years.
Now let me explain before you raise hell.
No, Rose never stops loving Lissa but it doesn't stop the fact that they don't need each other anymore. Life isn't going to stop, and Rose doesn't need to depend on Lissa. She has someone who is her companion in her life and - as much as people hate it - whom she loves more then the world. When Dimitri came into the question, Rose was no longer Lissas'. The same for Rose. When Christian came, Rose was out. That 'best friend' just became 'friend.' That doesn't change Roses' feeling for Lissa, it's just the truth. I know some people have never been in love this is a little hard for them to understand but, when you find someone you love, they become your best friend. When you find someone that you want to be with for the rest of your life, they become your best friend.
It's just how it works.
R.M. makes it seem like Lissa and Rose will be with each other forever when in fact they probably won't. Trust me, I am one to know. People move on. That's just how it works and you've got to move on too. New people will enter your life and then they will eventually leave. That's why we choose one person to love and to hold and Rose choose Dimitri as Lissa choose Christian. It also makes the friendships even more precious. Treasure it because it will eventually leave.
Don't hate me! This is just my opinion that I felt like sharing.
I dedicate this story to women who've been through child birth. This one is for you lovies!
Summary: 6 years after the Ruby Circle, Rose and Dimitri are ready to have kids! Embark on this adventure with them as they go through some high and some lows of pregnancy. Watch them become parents, how they feel, and how the little moments are the forever.
And remember, always stay Cheezy!
~Cheezy ;)
P.S. sorry for grammar problems!
Disclaimer; I do not own anything, I merely play in this fantastic world.
P.S.S I originally posted this story and I had a wonderful person (under the name of Guest) tell me that I accidentally wrote 8 mouths instead of 9 months. So, I want to thank this Guest for catching me on that!
Rose Belikova's Pov
I couldn't help a giggle escape as I watched Dimitri become nervous around pregnant women. He was tense, his hand over mine, his eyes wide. "There are so many of them." He whispered into my ear. This time, I laughed.
That laugh gained most of the women's attention in the gynecologist office. They all seemed annoyed – and I honestly couldn't blame them. They all had balloon bellies while I was just starting out. I bet they were all thinking along the lines of "skinny bitch" or "why doesn't she have pain?"
I rolled my eyes, partly because I was still so early on and really hadn't felt anything in there. Although, some other body parts – aka my breasts – started to hurt. And the fact that my period was 7 days late, and how when I peed on the stick it had a positive sign. I hadn't thrown up yet, which told me how early on I was. There really was no doubt that I was pregnant. The stick and my period said so - plus my boobs feel tender. I even looked that one up, and guess what popped up? "Pregnant."
There were husbands – or boyfriends – too. So were some mothers. Some were dads. The office was filled to say the least, we had obviously come on a busy day. Dimitri was taken so aback by the so many pregnant women. It was ironic that he found this shocking considering two of his sisters had babies – and one of them had one when he was around. It was all to amusing.
"Yeah, it's called a gynecologist office. It's where women come to check their uterus." I whispered back stoically.
"Yes, I know Roza. But, it's just so overwhelming." I laughed again – cue glares – and patted my husband on the shoulder. Over the years of being with him, we've gotten even closer. He wasn't the same guy when I first meet him. Dimitri was, well, Dimitri. He was still guarder around other people, but when he was alone with me, that's when he really came out. He is one of the most sarcastic people I know. He is also the most loving I know. We've been together for 8 years now, and basically told each other everything like teenager girls at sleepovers. If you were to tell me a secret, you would be also telling Dimitri. It's just one of those things about with being a person for 8 years, you tend to stop hiding secrets and start telling them everything.
"Get use to it." I murmured, checking my watch. We had been here for 30 minutes and I was starting to get hungry. "Do you think that one women who was as early as me has had her baby yet? Or are they just taking their sweet as-"
"Mrs. Belikova!?" The nurse – finally – called. I stood up, Dimitri following, and rushed to the door.
"Hi!" I said as the nurse lead us to the back. She lead us to a room, which was small and cubed. We all – the nurse, Dimitri and I – stuffed ourselves in the room. Dimitri took the seat next to the table and I took the table. The nurse went to the small station only a few feet from Dimitri and I. She pulled out that pressure thing you put on your arm, I honestly never remembered the name.
"Okay Mrs. Belikova, you think you're pregnant?" The nurse said, glancing at her clipboard.
"Uh, yeah. I've been having all the signs."
"Period?" She asked, coming over and placing the arm thingy on my arm.
"9 days late."
"Have you've gotten sick?"
"No. But my breast hurt." The nurse hummed, after taking my blood pressure, and wrote down what I said. She did other things, like check my heart beat and stuff. What a normal doctor would do if you went in for a checkup. Dimitri sat silently, observing us.
"Have you taken a test?" She asked once more and I nodded. "Okay, Dr. Harris will be with you shortly." She handed me sheet, which indicated she wanted me to strip my bottoms. I smiled, taking the sheet. One thing they don't tell you when you are younger about ultrasounds, is that you don't so the tummy and gel thing. They stick a stick up your ho-ha. It's usually the first ultrasound and then they switch to that gel stuff. If, on the other hand, were just going in for checkup – they do the ho - ha thing.
She left after that, leaving Dimitri and I alone. I sighed, stood up and removed my bottoms. Then I sat on the table again, the sheet over my lap. "Do you really think we're pregnant?"
"I'm pregnant Belikov. Need I remind you I'm the one holding the human being, you just helped." I said jokingly, turning to my husband with an amused smile. He gave me a snarky smile back and I laughed.
"The baby wouldn't be there without me." He mumbled.
"You want to hold a kid?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. "Cause, I'll switch. You can have a stick shoved up your vagina if you want. I'm going to be honest with you comrade, it's not that spectacular."
"No, I think I'm good." I shook my head at his response.
"Wimp." He shoved me a little. I batted his hands away, seeing his amused smirk. It occurred to me then that if my 17-year-old self saw me in this position, she would faint. I'm pretty sure his 24-year-old self would too. Dimitri and I held off having kids for a little bit after Adrian and Sydney dropped the bomb on us. After I got the vaccine, I made Dimitri go out and buy a bunch of condoms. I even went on birth control just to be safe. Now at 26, I think I was ready. After Lissa had sorted everything out about dhampirs and dhampirs having babies, she gave us the green light. That was two years ago. Now I was ready. Dimitri and I were trying to get pregnant. This was our lucky shot, we've been at it for 6 months – much to his pleasure.
"Am I interrupting?" Came Dr. Harris voice. She poked her head in, and when she was in the clear, her whole body following.
"No, you're good!" I said lightly. "How are you doing?" One thing about being a woman is that you get to know your gynecologist pretty well. I mean, she's been down under a few times and I've seen her a lot over the last 6 months with trying to get knocked up.
"I'm good! But this isn't about me, I mean we are one step closer!" She smiled brightly at me and then her eyes caught Dimitri. "You must be Dimitri!" She held one of her pale hands out to him, and he took it gladly.
"That would be me." Dimitri confirmed with one of his own smiles.
"So, we think we are pregnant!?" Dr. Harris said, getting back on track. She looked at her chart and smiled. "You are showing all the right signs. But let me get this correct, your period is 9 days late?"
"Yes."
"Your breast hurt?"
"Yes."
"You haven't been sick?"
"Nope."
"And you took a pregnancy test and it came out positive?"
"How many did you take?"
"4."
"Okay Rose, all looks good." She was now in her chair. She slipped on her gloved, pulled her equipment out and began the ultrasound. "Okay, sit back and spread your legs."
She glided over after I followed orders, one hand on the keyboard to the computer and the other sticking that stick up in me. She's multitasking. Woman power. I giggled at my own thought, gaining a raised eyebrow from Dimitri.
After a few moments of silence, as she looked for the possible baby, a smile came to her lips as she stared at the screen. She pointed to a small little peanut of a dot on the computer screen. "There is your baby."
My eyes were wide. We had done it. "I'm pregnant!?" Dr. Harris removed the stick and hand from between my legs, a smile upon her lips.
"Yep. You guys are pregnant!" She removed her glove, throwing it in the trash. I looked at Dimitri with a wide smile, one on his own face. He looked awed, his eyes still on the screen. He turned to me with the happiest smile I have ever seen. He was like a child on Christmas morning.
"We're going to have a baby." He whispered, his hands shaking. I nodded, tears already building up in my eyes. He engulfed me in his arms, whispering Russian nothingness to me. I don't think he could think properly in English at the moment so I did nothing to correct him.
My eyes met Dr. Harris again and I gave her a thankful smile. "How far along am I?" I asked once Dimitri pulled away. His smile stayed, and so did his arm around my shoulder.
"8 weeks." My eyebrows scrunched in confusion when she said that.
"I had my period last month though."
"That's normal. Was it heavy?" Dr. Harris reassured.
"No, but it was little dabs of blood. I just thought it was a light period." I said, my head resting on Dimitris' shoulder.
Dr. Harris laughed and shook her head. "No, you are fine. It takes a while for the baby to make itself known. You just didn't notice it at the 4-week mark and that's completely normal." I nodded my head, that joyful smile returning to my face. "I'll leave you two alone, but go to the desk and schedule your next appointment."
Dr. Harris left after that, leaving Dimitri and I to gush about the baby.
I was 9 months pregnant and I was all about ready to punch someone. I was late too. This baby just didn't want to leave.
Dimitri was on my nerves all the time. I think he was just making the effort to piss me off, I sure he found it fun. It was his game. Urgh! How I wanted to punch him.
"Hey Rose!" Lissa appeared next to me, a smile on her face. I just glared at her. Being overdue pregnant lady wasn't nice. The person inside me – which by the way I could feel every damn move he/she made – thought it was fun to make my life a living hell. I have to pee all the time. My feet – which I hadn't seen in ages – were killing me, and my back felt like death. "How are you feeling?"
"Lissa, I have a person inside me. How do you think I feel?" I snapped, my hand rubbing over my belly. It rested on the side of said belly, where I proceed to grab the foot of my child. Oh, yeah, when your 8 to 9 months pregnant – or at least until the baby has a foot – you can grab body parts. His/her foot rested right under my boob and his/her head on my opposite hip. Dimitri had a lot of fun tugging at my belly. If he grabbed the babies foot lightly, he/she would start kicking.
And I had done just that. "Stop it!" I pointed to my belly, slapping it lightly.
"Rose, what did you say to Dimitri?"
"That he was a little bitch." I said truthfully, ignoring her disapproved look. Right on que, my so called husband walked into the room. "Which he is!"
"Roza, beautiful, you look radiant today."
"Do not try to sweet talk me Belikov! You are the reason why I am so uncomfortable!" I seethed, my hard eyes trained on Dimitri.
"I'm just being honest." He came over and placed one of his big hands on my tummy, rubbing circles. The baby hadn't stopped kicking, it was like he/she disobeyed me because it was fun. Oh, I'm so screwed. As soon as he started to rub, the baby stopped. I moaned satisfied. I shrunk down more into the couch, my eyes closed.
"That feels good. Keep doing it." Lissa chuckled at my demands.
"Olena wanted me to tell you Rose that she went shopping and will be back in a few." Lissa told me, one of her hands going to my shoulders and started to rub. I was in heaven. Not only had Dimitri been by my side, but so was Olena and Mom. And Lissa. All four people had been my rock so far and I was blessed to have people like them to care about me.
"What is she shopping for?" I asked in a low murmur. Dimitris' hand stopped rubbing and the baby started to kick again. Lissa had applied more pressure to her figure tips, releasing the tension in my shoulders. I growled at my child, sitting up and re-opening my eyes to the world.
"Spicy stuff." Lissa replied with a smile. I know I've been a bitch to her, and I had the excuse of being pregnant to back me up, but in all honestly – I just wasn't in the mood.
"Does that stuff even work?" I asked in an irritated tone. Dimitris' hand had moved to my back, rubbing ever so lightly. I pushed into his hand more, loving the feeling of the rubbing. Lissa had stopped, her hands on my stomach. She grinned when the felt my child kick. I sent a glare towards her, which caused her to giggle.
"Sorry. I can't help it when the baby kicks my hand! It's pretty remarkable!" She reasoned, patting my leg. "And yes, it does. It will help with the labor."
According to Dr. Harris, I was already in labor. I was in the early stages – I'd been in these early stages for the last 2 weeks. She said it was normal for the baby to take his/her time, although I might feel a little uncomfortable. By the way, it's not a little, it's a lot. It gets pretty tiring when there is a baby inside you, one that you can feel every move they make and – when they are at rest – are just there. It's not like I hadn't felt the baby before, I have. When I was at 11 weeks, I felt gas bubbles. As time went on, I felt like there was an actual person inside me. Now I was tired of it. I wanted that person out, and I wanted them out now.
I rested my head on Dimitris' shoulder, blowing a strand of hair from my vision. "I'm sorry I've been mean to you guys lately. I've just been so uncomfortable!"
"It's okay Rose. We understand, it normal. And I'll let you be mean to me all day long if you to." She grabbed my hand and smiled at me. I squeezed her hand and gave her a tired one back. I could already feel my eyes start to droop. Lissa told me she had some queen things to attend and she would just let me sleep. I had given her a half heart nod, smiling just a little left quietly.
I was almost asleep when the baby sat on my bladder. I groaned and pulled myself from Dimitri. "Help me up comrade, the baby decided my Blatter is a dog toy."
And so he did, hoisting me up to my feet. I smiled and wobbled my way to the bathroom – Dimitri on my heels. I went to the bathroom, not closing the door because it was only Dimitri. I peed, and it was great. I moaned during it, earning a deep chuckle from Dimitri. "Have you thought of names?" He asked when I was wiping.
"Yes. I like the name Sophia. I also like the name Adam and Charles." I said, throwing the toilet paper into the toilet. Dimitri walked in, helping me off the seat. I pulled my pants up, flushed and washed my hands.
"I like Sophia too. I like the other ones as well, but I also like the name Tom." I laughed at that name.
"Tom?" I asked while I walked back into the living room. He nodded and I laughed once more. "Tom! I'm not a fan." I said honestly. I made my way towards the kitchen when I felt a rough kick. "Oh, yes I know! I'm getting you some damn food, calm your tits bro!" I yelled at my stomach. Dimitri came up behind me and kissed the back of my head. I could fell his amused smile.
"Did you just say our baby has breast?" He said softly into my hair.
"As a matter of fact, I did." I answered, my own smile coming to my lips. "You need to get out so we can meet you." I told my tummy, giving it a rub. I felt the foot of my baby, and then his/her hand.
I felt Dimitris' lips move to my neck. I closed my eyes and sighed. "That baby demands food comrade, not sex."
"It helps with the labor." He argued softly into my neck. I felt him nip and it took everything in me not to moan. "I don't think he minds."
"Okay, then I demand food. I'm hungry." I said, pulling out of his arms. I could almost feel his eye roll. I searched my cabinets for food.
"Spicy food Roza." Dimitri warned, going over to the coffee maker and started it up.
"Really? Do I have to? I've been eating nothing but spicy for the past 2 weeks! I deserve ice-cream." I argued, pulling the tub of ice cream to my face. The cool icy container connected with my cheek, giving me a shiver.
"Put it back." He said with is 'mentor' voice.
"You don't own me." I opened the tub any way and pulled a spoon out. "And-"
The tub was yanked from my hands, placed on the counter, and replaced by flaming hot Cheetos. "Can I at least have these with the ice cream?"
Dimitri thought about it, a hand on his chin and his eyes trained on the ceiling. I bet he's going to say no. "Sure."
A wide smile came to my lips as I mentally high fived myself. Yeah, ice cream and hot Cheetos for the win! I took the tub of ice cream and scooped out some into a bowl. And then I placed my Cheetos in the ice cream. I looked at Dimitri and saw a grimace. "I'm pregnant." I said as my excuse before leaving.
I heard his chuckle as I did so. His coffee was done later and he joined me on the couch with a steaming mug of coffee. I was clicking through shows on Netflix. "We need a new show." I observed. We'd finish our last one so we needed a new one. This was our thing. We would sit around and watch a show together. We did it every night. We sat in the same spot, clicked on our show, and watched away.
"Have you seen Stranger Things yet?" Dimitri shook his head. "Me neither, let's watch it." And that's what we did. Watch our show and just were being together.
That's a thing about love. It's not all about the sex and kisses, sometimes it just wanting to be near that person. Dimitri and I did that a lot. We would sit just close enough because we need to be that way. Or, we just wanted to be near each other.
I was curled into his side, a smile upon my lips. His hand was on my stomach, while mine rested on my hip and my other on his chest.
We stayed there for what seemed like forever.
I can't say that I didn't say that I didn't see it coming, because I did – my water breaking. I knew from the beginning of the two weeks it was going to happen anytime now. But it still scared me shitless when my water did break. That and the fact I was basically surprised into labor.
It was a sunny morning; the sun was fluttering low in the sky warning my world that it was early in the morning. I had woken up to go pee. I rolled out of my bed, slightly pushing Dimitris' arm off me. He tended to find a way to swing an arm around me during the night (day for humans.) He was sound asleep. Hair was splattered on his pillow, mouth slightly open as soft snores left his mouth. His arms were now sprawled out in each direction, his legs tangled in the covers. I had the urge to take a picture, and I did. I took my phone out, snapped a pic, and ran to the bathroom giggling. He looked cute and at peace and I just had to take a picture of it!
After using the restroom, I became hungry. The baby gave a little kick telling me he/she agreed with my thoughts. We trudged into the kitchen, me rubbing my round belly the whole way. I had become big, like really big. I honestly didn't mind, it told me my baby was healthy. But seriously, I was big. I couldn't see my feet, my stomach blocked everything. It was extremely hard to pick something up from the ground and I hadn't shaved since I was 5 months pregnant. Lucky for Dimitri, he got to do it.
"So like, I need to…" Dimitri had trailed off, making hand gestures at my vagina. "Clean it?"
"Yes." I said, flipping through a baby magazine. "I don't want to doctor to think when I'm pushing the baby out is 'wow this girl has a bush!'"
"And I have to do it because you can't see it?"
"Yes."
"I don't think the doctor is going to mind the hairs Roza." Dimitri observed, coming over and sitting next to me. "I think she will be focused on the fact that there is a baby leaving you."
"What? Are you scared to see what it has become? I haven't shaved in 3 mouths comrade! So, for all I know it could be an alpaca down there!" I scoffed, putting the magazine down. "You are going to get down there and shave. It's nothing you haven't seen."
"I still think it's useless." Dimitri told me as he followed me to the bathroom. I laughed, giving him the razor.
I found some pickles while I relived the memory. It was kind of funny really, he was joking when he was shaving me. If anyone were to be watching what he had done, they would have either laughed at the fact that Dimitri carried on a conversation like a champ while he cleaned down under, or they would be disgusted that my husband was helping me out. I found it funny.
I cracked the pickle jar open and took out one. I took a bit and moaned. I had been eating spicy foods out the ass, so it was refreshing to have something that wasn't spicy. I ate my pickles in peace for 10 minutes before yawning and started my way back to my room.
And then I had to pee again. I groaned and cursed my child for using my Blatter as a seat. "You are killing me smalls…" I mumbled to my child as I once again hobbled to the bathroom.
Once I had finished, I cleaned my hands and finally set off to my room. I stepped out of the door when a deep voice came out of nowhere. "Rose?"
"AHHHHHH!" I screamed and jumped. I turned to the intruder, not realizing I had peed myself when the intruder said my name. It turned out that intruder was Dimitri. "Jesus Dimitri! Give a girl a warning!"
Dimitri looked exhausted, but he managed to pull an 'are you serious' look. A raised eyebrow, a tilt of the head, and a small smirk. I hadn't stopped peeing, which was a little confusing since it didn't really feel like pee. "I did."
"Okay, maybe you did." I agreed. He had said my name, I was the one who freaked out. "Anyway, why are you up?"
"I woke up and you weren't in bed so, I got up to see where you went." Dimitri explained, and leaned onto the wall. I sighed, my peeing never stopping. That was when I began to notice it. That it hadn't stopped.
Then pre-labor cramps started. Only worse. It was like a giant hugging me, crushing my bones. I seethed from the pain, bending over. It dawned on me then that I was in labor. "Dimitri, my water broke!"
I never saw once in my life seen Dimitri have a panic attack. Once he heard those words he rushed over to me asking all these nonsense questions. "Dimitri." I said warningly, standing back up. "We need to get to the hospital. Go grab the bag, I'll be at the door. Calm the hell down." My voice was calm and low compared to his higher and stuttering one.
"Ok-okay." He stuttered out, rushing to get everything we needed. I waited at the door patiently, pondering what I was going to name my kid. I was calm. Ready. And also, scared shit less. The first contraction had passed and now I felt normal. My water had stopped too. Dimitri came to the door with two bags and pillows. He had shoes handing one of his figures. They were mine and I took them, shoving them on my feet. I took the bags from him as he opened the door for me. I looked into the hallway for a moment, my mind telling me "this is it. It's no longer about me."
"Rose?" Dimitris' now clam voice said. I turned to him, tears swelling up in my eyes.
"Ready to have a baby?" I asked with so much joy. His face lit up as he nodded. I sniffed wiping my eyes. "We are about to do the impossible."
Dimitri chuckled and pulled me into his arms. "What would we be if the great Rose Hathaway and Dimitri Belikov didn't do the impossible?"
I laughed, nodding into his chest. "Yeah." With one last deep breath, I stepped out of our apartment and we made our way to bring a miracle baby into the world.
Dimitri Belikov Pov
I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to become a father. My hands were gripping the steering wheel of the car hard. I was trying to keep my breath even for Rose, it wouldn't be the best if she knew I was freaking out.
Rose gasped suddenly and then whimpered. "Are you okay!?" I asked, panic lacing my voice.
"I'm great!" She expressed with fake joy. I couldn't look at her, but I did give her a quick side glance. "Just in the middle of having a kid. How about you?"
"I'm great!" I repeated her. My voice was a little too high, my fear sinking into me deeper. It wasn't like I didn't want to have a kid, I did. I've been wanting one for a long time, and when I began my relationship with Rose – I flushed that idea down the drain. But when we figured out that her and I could – thanks to Sydney and Adrian – that hope was restored. But now here I was, about to have a kid and I was so scared. I was terrified that I wouldn't be a good father, or that my child would hate me. Or what if I just screw up at being a parent?
Rose picked up on my tone and started to sense my fear. "Dimitri," Rozas' soft voice said calmly. "Are you – are you okay?" I gulped, my hands tighten on the wheel.
"I'm-I'm fine." I stuttered. I bit my lip and knew that I lied. If I was looking at her, I would have seen concern lace her beautiful features.
"Dimitri…" Roza sympathetically sighed. I felt one of her hands go onto my thigh – giving it a squeeze. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"It's nothing! It's really nothing," I said trying to convince her. Well, I was trying more to convince myself then I was her. This was all utter nonsense, I shouldn't be so scared. I wasn't the one giving birth, I wasn't the one in pain, I was suppose to be the person who was supportive. Not be the one scared out their mind.
"Dimitri, it's okay to be scared." Rose reassured. "I mean, I'm scared too! We are about to become parents! That's-that's, amazing and scary!"
"I know!" I agreed with my too high tone. I concluded that it was better to agree then it was to lie. She knew, and I wasn't going to deny the fact. "It's just all the questions! What if I mess up and make the kids life a living hell?" I gave a humorless laugh. "I don't want to be like my father, Roza."
"And you won't be." Rose – once again – assured. It seemed like she was the one giving me prep talks rather then I her. "In all my days, you are the one person I know that won't fuck this up. You did teach me, and I'm doing great. This kid will be amazing!"
I only nodded. She was right, I could do this. Just like I done her, and others. I could do this to my own flesh and blood. My hold on the wheel lessened, my tense shoulders releasing that tension and one in my hands finding hers'. "We can do this." I told her. I gulped down a lump in my throat, my hand gave hers a little squeeze.
"We can. We'll do it together." She prompted, squeezing my hand back. We stayed quiet for the rest of the car ride. Unlike other times, the car ride seemed short. We got there fast and that was good.
Rose and I rushed into the hospital when we arrived. I had the baby bag slung around my shoulder, both arms around my wife. Someone immediately came to assist us.
And in the blur of getting Rose to a room, there was a pause. A small one, I was stationed outside that room where you could see all the babies. I gulped – knowing my kid will be in there soon.
"Dad?" The nurse said, suddenly. I looked at her and smiled. Over the months, I've been called Dad from the nurses and doctors. I think it was their way of comforting you because you're were about to become a father -or mother. Roza was known as Mamma.
"Yes, I am coming." I said, my voice no longer high. Rose was in a bed, her eyes closed. When I came into the room, her eyes shoot open and a smile came to her lips.
"Comrade!" I chucked at her cheerfulness. "What took you so long?"
"I was looking at the babies." I said truthfully. She nodded and motioned me to come over to her. I did, sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Did you call Lissa? Or Mom? Olena?" She questioned. I sighed and shook my head.
"No, not yet. I'll call them now." I affirmed, hoping she wouldn't burst out crying. She done that a lot throughout the pregnancy, and I always seemed to make it worse. I even had to call Lissa once. Yeah, that helps my fear of being a father…
Rose didn't say anything but I could feel her anxiety and disapproval of me not making those calls. I tried not to take it to heart considering I wasn't in her position, but it didn't stop the lump in my throat or how my stomach dropped. I have everything under control. I thought to myself. I kept repeating those words in my head, trying to make myself believe them when in fact I didn't. I didn't have everything under control. Everything was flying around like bats in the night and I had no idea how to bring those flying bats back to the cage.
I stepped out of the room and called the people I needed to. All of them were excited, all them ready to meet this baby. My mother had said she was already in the car when I called, apparently, she had a 'feeling.' When Lissa heard Rose was in labor she screamed at Christian and her Guardians. I had to hold the phone away from my ear as she shouted for everyone to get in the car. Abe and Janine were calm and collected and said they were heading out the door as soon as possible.
I stepped back into the room to see Rose groaning in pain. Her face was scrunched up as another contraction hit her. I swiftly walked over to her and grabbed her hand into mine. "Are you alright?"
"No, Dimitri, I am not. I am currently having my vagina widen. It fucking hurts." She snapped at me, squeezing my hand hard. "It's like a giant hugging me!"
"A what?"
"It feels like a giant hugging me!" Rose barked, she pushed her hands to my lower back. "It starts here." She then traced her hands around my waist and to my stomach. "And then it goes to here. Like a giant hugging you!"
"Oh, um, okay." I blubbered, one of my hands going to the back of my neck. "I'm sorry." I apologized, hoping to get on her good side. I know it is hard for a woman to be nice during childbirth, but when you put Rose Belikova in labor, then hell is about to get a beat down.
"You better be." She mumbled, crossing her arms. I really didn't know what to do. I was scared – not only about becoming a father but Rose too – and I had no clue how to deal with Rose.
"Is there anything I can get you?" I asked, putting as much love into my voice. She looked at me, narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth. I knew then I had made a mistake and was about to get the Hathaway lecture when the Dr. Harris walked in.
"Ah! Rose, we made it!" Dr. Harris exclaimed happily. She looked like her usual put together self – blond hair in a perfect bun, lab coat in tack, heels clicking happily on the floor, glasses on her nose, and a sweet smile upon her lips. "Let's see how far along we are."
Rose gave a happy sigh when Dr. Harris walked in. As if she need another woman around. "I'm so glad you're here!"
Dr. Harris chuckled and came over. Rose spread her legs apart as Dr. Harris checked up there. Her eyebrows scrunched together, her mouth going into a thin line. "Hmm, well you are only dilated 1 cm. And you have to be at 10."
"That was 1 cm?" Rose asked bewildered. "That pain was 1 cm?" Dr. Harris chuckled, which received a glare from Rose, and explained.
"Yes. Labor tends to be intense."
"Will this go any faster?" Rose said with that surprised tone.
"It depends on the baby and the mother. So far, this is normal speed. When the baby comes, then the baby shall come." Dr. Harris explained, her smile returning. "No food, just ice chips."
Rose grasped my hand and squeezed hard, letting an agonized scream. I did what I knew best; I spoke Russian to her. It seemed to help, her head had fallen on my shoulder as she breathed hard. "It hurts." She whimpered and I never felt so bad.
"I'm so sorry." I whispered back to her, kissing the top of her forehead. Dr. Harris had left to give us space. "Do you want me to get some ice chips?"
"That would be great." I gave her one last kiss before leaving to find some ice ships.
The labor was long. 18 hours. Rose had been in labor for 18 hours. She is a real solider, because as time progressed, the contractions just got more intense. She would whimper, scream, throw threats, hold onto my hand, and cry.
I was out again getting more ice chips when the nurse came to me. "Dad, she's ready to push."
I almost dropped the cup of ice when I heard those words. I didn't, I just threw them in a nearby trash can. The nurse and I rushed to where Rose was, which was in a different room. Rose was sitting up, partly because of the bed had her sitting in a seated position. Her legs were to her chest and opened to Dr. Harris.
"Oh, thank God!" Rose gasped when I walked into the room. I was by her side in a second. One of my hands went to her back and rubbed while the other was holding her hand.
"Okay Mamma, you are already. Do you feel like you need to push?" Rose nodded aggressively, and winced. "Okay, you are going to push when I say to push. Do not push when I don't say it, understand?" Rose didn't say anything but nod.
She let out a scream then, sweat starting to crease her skin. "Alright Mamma, here we go. Give me one long push." Rose followed instructions and pushed. She let out cry, her hand squeezing mine excruciatingly hard.
"It's okay baby, you go this." I whispered into her ear. "You're amazing, just push. It will be over soon."
"Okay Rose stop." Rose stopped pushing, falling back onto the bed. For the next 2 hours, we kept up with the pushing. My head had fallen in between her shoulder in neck as I whispered sweet Russian nothingness to her. I also spoke English, telling her how beautiful and amazing she was.
Rose screamed, her arms tensing and her body leaning forward as she gave another push. Her dark hair was sticking to her forehead from how much she was sweating. Her hospital gown had ridden up far on her legs, and Rose no longer laid back onto her bed. She was breathing hard and looked exhausted.
Her head had fallen onto mine, her chest heaving. "I can't. No more I can't." Rose whimpered, her whole body giving out. We hadn't heard the baby cry because he/she was coming out breech – which made labor even more painful.
"Yes, Roza you can." I whispered into her neck, giving it light kisses. "You can, I believe in you. Bring this baby into the world. I love you so much."
"Okay, Mamma," Dr. Harris said with a bright smile. I knew that smile was starting to test Roza, but in that moment, I think she was too tired to hate it. "One more push and he'll be out."
"He?" Rose bleated softly, a twinge of love in her voice. "It's a he?"
Dr. Harris gave a wider smile and nodded. "Now, if you give me one more long push – he'll be brought into the world." I pulled out of Roses' neck and met her eyes. A boy. The baby was a boy. I saw determination flash in her eyes before giving that one long push.
And then, he cried.
I can't say why, but when those little wails entered the room, all the love I could ever hold was in those wails. I could count the times I have cried in my life on one hand, and this little baby had added another finger.
In those first few seconds it was like a punch in a gut. Having a kid is an experience you will have to go through to fully understand how it feels. All you think it, that's my baby.
I am not a shellfish person, I always try to put the people I love first, but when he entered the world all I kept thinking was it's no longer about me. That sense to protect him, that sense to take care of him, everything was wrapped into that moment.
In the first few seconds of his life, my baby had consumed all my love. How fucking wonderful is that?
Rose was sobbing – of joy – as I was. Dr. Harris cut the cord, and held our child up. "He's so tiny." Roza whispered, sniffling. She was looking at him with so much love in joy it hurt. I guess I was doing the same.
Dr. Harris took our baby away and I panicked a bit. "It's okay Daddy, we are just cleaning him up." Dr. Harris assured, taking her gloves off. "You two are proud parents of a little boy."
Before I knew it, I ran out of the door and ran down the hallway to the waiting room where our family sat. I burst through the entrance of the waiting room, and looked around for my family. Sure enough, there sat Lissa, Christian, Abe, Janine, my Mother, sisters, Adrian, Sydeny, Declan, Jill, and Eddie.
I had the biggest grin on my face as I ran over to them. "He's amazing!" I yelled, not noticing a chair in front of me. I fell forward and tumbled over the chair – hitting the ground hard.
I heard a chorus of "ohs!" But I could care less. I laughed with joy as I stood back up, and looked at them. "He's here! And – oh God – he's amazing!" I crackled with absolute joy. I heard everyone give cheers, but I was already on my way back to Roza.
I came back to the delivery room to see Roza smiling and holding our son. She looked up at me and beamed at me. "He's perfect." She whispered.
I rushed over, sitting on the bed. Rose winced but didn't say anything. He was at peace, his eyes opened as he looked at his Mother and I. "Hey there little guy." Rose said, rocking him back and forth. "Welcome! We've been wanting to meet you for so long."
"Hello there, kitten." I chimed in. I stroked his cheek with my figure. Rose gave me an odd look.
"Kitten?"
I shrugged and smiled even more. "I don't know. It's just a nick name." I smiled even wider as my son yawned, his eyes dropping and eventually closing.
"Do you want to hold him?" Rose asked, her happy eyes meeting mine. I nodded and held my arms out. Rose placed him in my arms and – if it was possible – my smile got even wider.
He was so tiny in my arms but he fit. "You know, he's big for his age?" Rose commented as she observed us. "9 pounds. He's a chubby little thing."
"Yeah he is." I agreed. He looked like Roza. He had a head full of her dark hair, his skin was the color of the inside of an almond, and he had her eyes. He had two little chubby cheeks that looked like a squirrel when they had nuts in their cheeks. They had a splash of red on each. His lips parted a little and let out a sigh. My finger traced his cheek and caused him to squirm. His hand shot up and grabbed mine, tugging on it.
In that moment, all my fears of being a father disappeared. I knew I could do this because I loved him and would go to the end of hell if he wanted me to. I'm a father, this was it. This was that moment when you just knew you're a father – and I couldn't be happier.
I leaned over and kissed Roza on her forehead and then her lips. I was so proud of her, so proud she did this, that she held him and then gave us to him. He was a part of her – which made me love him even more – and he was absolutely fantastic.
"Adam." Rose said suddenly after she pulled away from my lips.
"What?" I asked, giving her a confused look.
"Adam. Adam Ivan Belikov." She answered and waited for me to connect the pieces. It clicked; his name. I smiled when she gave Ivan's name to Adam. He deserved it, Ivan, to have his name carried on. I think Adam would do a wonderful job in keeping that name.
"Perfect." I agreed, bending over and kissing Adams' forehead. It really did fit him, Adam. It was one of Roses' favorite names and it seemed to fit this baby.
"I'm so glad I was a stupid teenager." Rose notified. I looked at her in confusion. "I'm so glad I ran away with Lissa because if I hadn't, we would never be here. I was force to grow up when I left, and although I hadn't completely matured, I did have an understanding of the real world. If I hadn't done that, then I would have been a rude teenager that thought she was better than everyone else." She paused and looked at Adam with more love than I have ever seen. "And I'm glad you came and dragged us back. If those events never happened, we wouldn't be here. I would never know what it was like to be a mother, I would never know what it was like to find my person, I would have never known what it was like to have a real family. So, I'm just glad I made a mistake – because if I hadn't, I would never have known how wonderful my life could have been. Mistakes lead us where we need to go, they lead us to our forever. I believe we made it to our forever." Rose finished her speech with a couple of tears in her eyes. "I'm just so happy I got to love you and Adam. I'm just so happy that I get to live this life I never imagine I would have."
I handed her Adam back and wrapped an arm around her. "Look whose being all wise now." I teased, kissing her forehead. "You are right, mistakes are what lead us to our forever."
"Do you think we made it?"
"Yes, I think we are in the beginning of our forever. I believe forever is just in the moment, and moments don't last forever. They last to what seems like forever, but darling, forever is a long winding road of mistakes. We just have to make sure we are making the right mistakes so we can have our small moments of forever." Rose leaned into me and stroked Adams face.
"This is just the beginning of our forever moments."
"Yes." Rose looked up at me and smiled. She reached one of her hands out and stroked my cheek.
"Then, my love, let our forever moments begin."
The End.