Full summary: Magnus isn't really sure how it happened. One minute, he's a struggling college student living on his own and then the next, he's living with some guy he's only just met—who also happens to be a gay porn star. Malec, AU, Pornstar!Alec, two-shot. Rated for sensitive content, cussing, and smut in the second part.

Notes: For starters, the (long) title comes from the ever wonderful song "Out Tonight" from the musical Rent. Secondly, I do not own these characters. They belong to Cassandra Clare. I only own the plot (which I was kind of disappointed to find out hadn't happened before) and that's about it. Thirdly, this will have two chapters (hence: two-shot). Fourthly, I can't believe I've actually fucking wrote this. It's been in my mind for ages and well… it happened. Also, I honestly can't write a story without some angst (so beware that) and this will have a lot of line breaks since the site doesn't allow spaces.

R&R, my loves! (:

Can't Sleep in the City of Neon and Chrome

He blames Camille for everything.

She's the one who introduced them, the one made them realize that they should move in with each other since they were both struggling with balancing out a part time job, living on their own, and going to college, she's the one who told the other they both like boys. She's the one to blame for Magnus falling in love with a fucking porn star.

Moving in with him had seemed like the right idea at the time and sometimes, it still does. But things change and now he knows Alec becomes Alex Light in front of a camera and does all the things Magnus knows he'd rather keep in the privacy of his bedroom. And now he understands why people at their college and in random stores and at different places miles away from here give him weird looks, give both of them weird looks.

At first, Alec didn't tell him. Magnus had just assumed that he did whatever college students do to get by, like working at a bookshop or a nearby café or the Starbucks on campus or that maybe he was a paid intern at some company like Magnus himself is at Vogue. He never expected Alec's answer to porn star, though, and he definitely had not been ready for that conversation.

But he's gotten used to it by now, all things considered.

He just can't get used to nights like this.

Magnus looks up from his People magazine as the door is thrown open and slams against the wall, causing a loud bang to resound throughout the apartment. Chairman Meow jumps up at the unexpected sound and he hisses viciously before dashing into Magnus' room to hide underneath the bed, where he'll stay for another good two hours before he's sure the threat is vanquished.

"Hello, Alexander," Magnus says and Alec looks at him with those blue eyes, his cheeks dark with what Magnus knows is shame. He tries to say hello, but his voice fails and he gives up a second later anyways. Without a word, or even another attempt at a few, he moves over to the couch and sits down next to Magnus with a heavy sigh.

Setting his People magazine aside, he asks softly, carefully, "What happened this time?"

"It was horrible," Alec answers and he bends down to undo his boots, his fingers clumsy with the laces, purposely not meeting Magnus' eyes. Magnus watches his hands, unusually graceless, and realizes just what he's wearing—he has on a thin T-shirt that's too big for him, slipping off his shoulders to expose the sharp juts of his collarbones and the sleeves hang halfway down his palms, making him look innocent even though his hair is messed up like someone has been harshly tugging at the strands. His deep brown leather boots are knee-high and he's wearing dark leggings that look like they belong on a young woman in a Pink catalogue.

Magnus would absolutely love what he's wearing, if it wasn't for Alex's sake.

"Why?"

Alec kicks his shoes off over to the side of the couch and leans back, closing his eyes, and he says quietly, "It… it was two guys again this time. One of them kept on calling me a slut, while the other one kept on calling me his bitch. It was disgusting. And there was no damn preparation, none at all, so every goddamn thing fucking hurt."

Some nights, Alec will come home like this—agitated and bruised all over, soul and body. Others, he'll be fine and he won't talk about it because he doesn't need to. And still others, he'll bring the guy home (always only one) and Magnus will have to put up with Alec's real moans seeping in through his walls and the anonymous man lingering around until Alec has to leave for his morning classes.

But Magnus hates these nights the most, even when each of Alec's whimpers and cries and the few screams uttered feel like ice working through his veins.

…

"What are you doing up?" Magnus asks before he can stop himself and Alec startles, the coffee he has his hand wrapped around almost sliding off the table.

"I, um…" Alec's voice trails off and he fixes the coffee mug back into its place. With a sigh, he closes his Psychology text book he has resting in front of him and says, "I didn't go to sleep. Plus, I have to finish some work I didn't get a chance to do yet."

"But it's five o'clock in the morning," Magnus says. He takes the seat across from Alec at their small kitchen table and crosses his legs, watching him closely. "You don't get up until seven. And even then you still bitch about it being too early."

Alec shrugs. "Actually, to be honest, I couldn't fall asleep."

"You've been awake for almost a whole entire day?"

Alec just shrugs again. "Yeah."

"Then why don't you just go to sleep, forget about your work for now, and skip out on school today?" Magnus suggests and a second later, he watches as Alec's face shifts for forced unconcern to sudden annoyance.

"Fuck no," he scoffs, like it's the most ridiculous idea in the world.

"You're not going to make it through today, Alexander, if you—"

"I hate it when you call me that," Alec interrupts and he abruptly stands up, kicking his chair back away from him with more force than he needed.

"Would you rather me call you Alec, then?" Magnus questions, only a little sarcastically, as he watches Alec move over to the sink, pouring his coffee down the drain, and throw his mug into the sink to be cleaned later.

Alec doesn't turn to look at him as his hands clench around the edge of the sink, the metal biting into his skin. He shakes his head, his shoulders tensed.

"No," he says faintly. "No, I don't. I want you to call me Alexander."

…

He doesn't stay home, even though he only has half an hour of sleep in his system by the time he's done with his Psychology work. And then he has even less time than that to get ready so he can be on time for his morning classes. He doesn't eat breakfast, he doesn't even take a quick sip of the coffee Magnus made for him in preparation of him needing it.

Magnus knows this is ruining him, little by little, with every passing late night and video and fake moan and sold 'just barely eighteen!' He just doesn't know what he can do.

…

Magnus discovers later that day, when night has long since fallen and almost everyone has gone to sleep (including the Chairman himself), that he never wants to Alec cry ever again.

Magnus has a late class each Tuesday night, which goes well into the double digits every single time, so he hadn't expected to run into Alec when he finally got home. He knew Alec had another shoot today and he knew that it was probably going to end up leaving Alec in tatters, but he hadn't expected to find him sitting on the couch with his knees pulled up to his chest, his arms wrapped around his legs as he quietly sobbed into his clothing.

When he comes back to their apartment to find Alec like this, he stands in the opened doorway for a long time before he can think of what to do. And even then, he knows Alec won't like it, won't be comfortable with being caught. Regardless, he somehow manages to shut the door behind him silently and to soundlessly drop his bag onto the kitchen table as he passes by it on his way over to the couch.

He only hesitates a moment before reaching out his hand and placing it on Alec's shoulder. Alec jumps beneath his touch and whips around, his eyes going wide. He then quickly starts to wipe away his tears, like he's ashamed, like Magnus hasn't already seen them.

"M-Magnus," he stutters, his cheeks flaming. "What… what's up?"

"What's wrong, Alexander?" Magnus asks, even though he already knows.

"Ah, nothing. I just... I-"

"Don't lie to me, Alexander," Magnus cuts him off with a sigh. He moves to the front of the couch, sitting down next to Alec. Alec clutches his hands around his knees once Magnus is next to him and Magnus can now see that they're shaking, tremors running the lengths of his long fingers. "What's wrong?"

Alec stays silent for a full minute and then he says, his voice noticeably weaker, "Honestly, it's nothing. Today has just been… It's been a hard day."

"Why are you crying, then?"

The color in Alec's cheeks burn deeper and he turns his head away, pressing his cheek against his knees still drawn up to his chest. "It's been a hard day," he repeats, like that explains everything—which it does.

"You can talk to me about it, about anything," Magnus says gently and he puts his hand on Alec's back, almost as if it alone can bring Alec comfort. But Alec does relax into his touch, much to his surprise, and he even moves closer to Magnus so that his head is resting on Magnus' shoulder and his hand is clutching at the front of Magnus' shirt, like a little kid afraid of the monsters underneath his bed rather than the real ones out there roaming about the world.

"I know I can," is his only reply.

…

They ended up falling asleep like that, wrapped up in each other.

It almost hurt to let him go the next morning.

…

"Magnus…"

The soft voice tears him away from his book, but when he looks up to see Alec standing in his doorway, his arms crossed over his chest in a purely defensive gesture, his eyes downcast and trained on the floor, he doesn't care.

"Yeah?"

"Can I borrow some of your makeup?"

"What? Why do you want to borrow my makeup?" Magnus asks and when Alec doesn't reply right away, he moves from his laying down position, pushing his book on to one of his pillows to be forgotten about until later, and looks imploringly at Alec.

"It's what they want," Alec finally answers with a small shrug. He's still not meeting Magnus' eyes, even as he moves into the room.

Magnus stares at him for a long moment, dumbstruck. But then he realizes that of course that's what they want. Of course they want Alec to be someone who he isn't: Alex and feminine enough to wear makeup and submissive in all the wrong ways. It makes him sick to his stomach.

But he forces these thoughts down and says with only slight contempt creeping into his voice, "Sure, but let me do it for you. I'd hate to see how it'd turn out if you did it yourself."

Alec just nods and takes Magnus' offered hand, letting Magnus pull him over and sit him down in the chair placed in front of his vanity table. Reaching behind the vanity's back with unease growing in the pit of his stomach, Magnus finds and presses a minute button. The lights lined in a half circle around the mirror's edge all flicker on, like a 1920s Hollywood starlet's.

He pulls the chair over from his desk, which he's now thankful for since this time calls for two, and sits down across from Alec. Alec look like he wants to speak, but he keeps his mouth shut. Sometimes, Magnus wishes he would speak. He grabs Alec's chin and tilts his head to the side, his blue eyes catching very distractively in the light, and looks for any flaws he may need to cover. He finds none.

"Jesus Christ," he murmurs, the words pulled from his lips before he has the chance to stop them. He moves his hand away and starts rummaging around on the vanity's counter, looking for the eye shadow he knows will clash wonderfully with, and bring out, Alec's eyes. When he finds it and unscrews the lid, dropping it back on to the counter, he turns back around to see Alec watching him carefully.

"What?" Alec asks.

"What do you mean 'what'?"

Alec rolls his eyes. "What was that 'Jesus Christ' comment about?"

For a second, Magnus thinks he should lie. But he answers anyways, forcing the confidence out of himself, "You're just so beautiful. It's almost unbelievable."

Alec's eyes widen and Magnus moves his attention back to the eye shadow in his hand, and he runs the brush heavily over the makeup. When the clean white of the brush has been covered with the light purple to mishmash with Alec's blue eyes, he then carefully blows on it until the powder in evened out in the way he can work with it.

It's not until after he's done with this that Alec says, so quietly Magnus almost misses it, "Thank you."

Magnus can't reply, so he says instead, "Close your eyes."

Alec does as he's told, but once he senses that the brush is close to his eyes he flinches back.

"Come on, now," Magnus groans. "Don't be like that. Work with me a little, Alexander."

Alec huffs out a sigh, but this time he forces himself to stay still as Magnus once more leans in closer. He flinches a little once he feels the smooth makeup being applied, but it's nothing Magnus can't work with. In fact, he has to smile because he had thought Alec would be worse than this.

As the minutes continue to tick by, Alec lets him finish the eye shadow and even lets him put on the coal black eyeliner and mascara (even though his eyelashes are already long enough) with minimal complaints, but when it comes to the lip gloss he shakes his head and says, "No."

"No?" Magnus repeats, raising an eyebrow. "No what?"

"No lip gloss."

"Oh, shut it," Magnus says, but when he starts to roll the cap off of the tube of clear lip gloss, Alec shakes his head again.

"It's gross," he intones, sounding much like a whiny teenage girl who's not getting her way. "It's messy and goopy and it's just gross."

"It's just lip gloss!" Magnus says, astounded. Surely Alec's had to kiss many guys that have been wearing lip gloss, right?

Alec looks at him, waiting for him to see his point of view. But Magnus goes on to say, "You're ruining your bottom lip by biting down on it. If you let me put on the lip gloss, it'll pull focus away from the torn skin."

"I—what?"

"I know it's a habit you do when you're nervous," Magnus starts with a roll of his eyes, "but if you let them look ruined, hardly any guy is going to think of how those pretty lips would look even better wrapped around his dick."

"Oh my God," Alec breathes and he leans back in the chair, staring at Magnus with wide eyes, the lip gloss problem now forgotten.

"Hm?" Magnus says, but he's smiling too. He can't help it.

"I can't believe you fucking said that," Alec says and he begins to laugh. Magnus thinks that, maybe, it's the most glorious sound he's ever heard. This time this laugh is untainted, real, and Magnus loves it. It fits this beautiful boy sitting in front of him; the broken side of him, the darkest side, for this moment, is hidden away.

And it's wonderful.

Eventually, their laughter sobers up once the reality of their situation, of why Magnus is putting makeup on Alec for, hits. The silence isn't unbearable, though. It's a bit uncomfortable, a bit sad, a bit bitter—but it's not broken. And that's what actually matters.

"So," Magnus ventures into the quiet and somewhere outside his still opened doorway, he can hear Chairman Meow mew low in his throat, "are you gonna let me put this lip gloss on your or not?"

Alec tries for a smile and says, "Sure, why the hell not?"

Magnus tries to pick up on the mood, too, and he says teasingly, "You just want guys to think about you giving them a blowjob, don't you?"

There's another laugh, but not like the one before. This one sounds tired out and used, like his real laugh has disappeared. Regardless, he says jokingly, "Yes, Magnus, that's exactly why I'm letting you put this lip gloss on me. So that you and every other guy out there can think about me sucking them off!"

Magnus pauses, halfway through reaching out to Alec before he changes his mind about the lip gloss, and says, his voice cracking on the one word, "Me?"

"I-I didn't mean it like that..." Alec mumbles and he looks away from Magnus' eyes once more, his cheeks flushing a deep scarlet red, and Magnus is sure he's the only who has ever seen a porn star blush.

"I know you didn't mean it like that," he says after a long time and his voice comes out strained and breathless. But he can't help thinking: what if Alec had?

…

It's one o'clock on a Friday morning and Magnus should be sleeping since he has to get up so early to be on time for his morning classes. But instead of sleeping peacefully, he has his earbuds in, his iPod turned all the way up to full blast, and he's switching between Lana Del Rey and Marina and the Diamonds to drown out the two sets of porn-like moans coming from Alec's room.

With a disgusted sigh he both hopes can be heard and is too quiet to hear, Magnus flips on to his stomach and taps his iPod, bringing it back to life. He's only staying in Lana's and Marina's sections and now he switches halfway through Lana's "Bel Air" to Marina's "Homewrecker" because he thinks it's a little more than fitting for his current moment's attitude.

For now, he can only hope that the guy's gone by the time he starts getting ready.

…

He doesn't get to sleep until two-thirty, an hour and a half later, yet he still gets up at five—like he always does, whether he has classes or not, or what day of the week it is.

Unfortunately, he's not surprised that Alec sleeps in a little today. He rises when Magnus is just on his way out, at seven-thirty, and he looks dead to the world. The other man's not with him; he must have snuck out sometime during the dark hours, but Alec's shirtless, only clad in his plain black boxers, and the bruising bite marks covering his body are obvious in the bright morning light streaming through the windows. He rubs at his eyes and yawns and has just enough energy to wave goodbye to Magnus before he leaves.

…

Starting Saturday, Alec has a week off from doing anything for his company. He still has his classes, of course, but no videos or movies or photo shoots or threesomes and no random men coming home with him.

Magnus thinks they'll both enjoy his time off.

…

The next Tuesday night, Magnus comes home late into the night yet again. And yet again, he finds himself faced with Alec. But this time he's not crying, not hurting, not trying to hide anything. Instead, he's lying on his back on the couch with his iPhone held up in front of his face and Magnus smiles, knowing he's re-watching American Horror Story on Netflix.

Alec doesn't notice Magnus walk over to him, or Magnus at all, until he pulls the earbuds from his ears with a forceful tug.

"You know, watching something with your earbuds in and the volume turned all the way up at midnight could cause you some problems at some point," Magnus says with a slight smirk before he can complain.

"Screw you," Alec huffs as he rips his earbuds from Magnus' hand, but he's smiling too. He's been doing that a lot this week.

"So," Magnus starts as he walks around to the other side. He shoves Alec's legs off and sits down, but before Alec can complain some more he pulls his legs back onto his lap.

"Yeah?" Alec prompts when Magnus doesn't continue, rolling his eyes in exasperation.

"Since we both don't have classes or work tomorrow due to the stupidest holiday on Earth, do you want to do something?"

Alec watches him for a minute, the smile slipping off his lips.

"Magnus… I-I don't…"

"No," Magnus interrupts, stopping Alec's train of thought. "No, no. I don't mean as a date. God, I should have worded that differently. But no, not a date. I know that seems weird since it's Valentine's Day and all, but I just figured that we could hang out with each other since we both have time off…. You know what? Forget it. It was a stupid idea anyway."

"No!" Alec says, panic tingeing his voice and he grabs Magnus' arm as he stands up from the couch, his eyes suddenly wide. "No, I do want to do something with you! I just… Yes, I want to."

It's Magnus' turn to stare at him. Watching him carefully, he then says slowly, even though he knows he wants it to be, "Okay, but we've established that it isn't a date?"

"Yeah," Alec agrees, but his eyes are still wide.

…

Even though they said it wasn't a date, Magnus takes a longer time to work on his appearance. It's ridiculous, he knows, but he can't help it. It's Alec and Alec deserves everything, even if that is having Magnus take a long time to perfect his appearance.

He's standing in front of the wall length mirror situated in his room, judging how he looks by his own standards since he can't ask Alec this time. Since it's not a date and it's casual and Magnus doesn't want to come on too strong anyways, he's wearing dark wash skinny jeans, a plain white long-sleeved T-shirt with a sleeveless gray cardigan opened up over it, black fingerless gloves and a slim scarf to match because it's a little above ten degrees outside, and gray Chuck Taylors with subtle purple piping.

He's got on the same light purple eye shadow he'd put on Alec a few days ago, just to match the purple in his Converses, and the only other type of makeup he's wearing is lip gloss with a tint of glittery pink to it.

When he decides that he looks decent enough, he walks out of his room to wait for Alec. When Alec comes out of his own room a few minutes later, Magnus isn't ready for it. He's wearing skinny jeans that hug the soft curves of his hips a little too well, that also make a fine display of his ass—which is already too distracting for Magnus without those skinny jean's help. He has on a tight blood red top and boots that he actually wants to wear.

When he sees Magnus waiting for him in the living room, he smiles and Magnus has to remind himself that this is not a date.

…

Alec's pale cheeks are pinched with pink and his breath is coming out in puffs of silvery white, the snow falling from the sky collecting in his hair and on his clothes before it melts into water. Magnus had ended up giving him his gloves once he noticed his hands were shaking from the cold, but now he's rubbing them together as if to generate heat.

"Who knew you'd get so cold so easily," Magnus notes.

"It's fucking thirteen degrees outside," Alec snaps. "I have no idea how you're not freezing, you freak."

"I'm cold a heart," Magnus answers with a smile and Alec looks at him, his eyes narrowing and he murmurs a quiet "idiot" when he looks away. Magnus' smile just widens.

Another five minutes out in the cold and Magnus can hear Alec's teeth chattering.

"All right, all right," he says, a little worried now. "We're here. Let's get inside before you die of hypothermia."

Alec's eyes dart up to the wooden sign hanging above the door to see the name Taki's written across it in fine script before he nods. When they're inside the crowded diner (thanks to Valentine's), it only takes them a moment to be ushered to a two seated table in the front by a petite waitress with fire red hair (whose name tag reads Clarissa). Still, Alec's shivering in the diner's warmth and Magnus has to smile.

"What?" he asks when he sees Magnus' wicked smile, his eyes narrowing once again.

"I just never thought your weakness would be cold."

"I—"

"Oh, shut up," Magnus interrupts. "Give me your hands, you big baby."

"What?"

With a sigh, Magnus reaches across the table and grabs Alec's hands. He intertwines their fingers and squeezes gently, once more reminding himself that this is not a date; this is just them hanging out together on their day off and he's just warming up a friend.

Alec stares at Magnus, an unreadable expression on his face, but he doesn't pull his hands away. Magnus can actually see his shoulders relax, like the warmth is finally setting in. They stay like that until Clarissa arrives with their drinks (Magnus' coffee, Alec's tea), but even then it takes them a moment to part.

…

Alec's laughing by the time they get home.

It's that same laugh Magnus feels like he hasn't heard in years, even though he's known Alec for a few months and he heard it only days ago. It's loud this time, too, and his eyes are shining with happiness.

"Thanks for today, Magnus," Alec says once they're inside and he scoops Chairman Meow off the back of the couch, still smiling.

"What do you mean?" Magnus asks, unwinding his scarf from around his neck. He takes off his coat too and figures that Alec will probably be in his own coat and Magnus' gloves for another good five minutes before he wants to shuck them off.

Alec shrugs and sets Chairman Meow down on the ground.

"You made me feel normal today," he answers and this time, his voice is gentle, "like I'm just a regular guy going out with one of his friends, rather than a porn star lucky enough to have a day off."

Magnus isn't sure what to say to that and Alec must notice, because he smiles again. But it's faint and it does a good job of setting Magnus on edge. Alec walks over to him slowly with that smile and when he stops, he stares into Magnus' eyes like he's searching for something.

"You know," he begins and he reaches out to wrap his hand around Magnus' upper arm; Magnus can feel the chill of his skin even through his long-sleeved shirt, "I don't think either of us is stupid enough to convince ourselves that today wasn't a date."

"I—what," Magnus stutters and he almost takes a step back from Alec. "What—what do you mean?"

"You know what I mean," Alec replies.

And then he's leaning in without another word and pressing his lips to Magnus'.

A/N: And part two should be coming to you soon enough! (: